gnumanth/dadjokes-tuned-opt
Text Generation
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joke
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Where are the Andes? At the end of your armies.
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19536c80-57ec-4e13-9575-b759b80a551a
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Andes Are In The Candy Aisle
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I am terrified of elevators. I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them.
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377d4fb2-ec20-4213-b06c-dabd4184cd14
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This Joke Expired Years Ago
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What's the difference between a jeweller and a prison warden? One sells watches, and the other watches cells.
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3775c7e2-d5c2-47d6-8329-2d34f01d03f6
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Prison Jewelry
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Did you hear that the police have a warrant out on a midget psychic ripping people off? It reads "Small medium at large."
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47e287a2-e9e7-4208-bb33-b2faae97c1c6
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Small Thefts
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My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
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22dea85e-3954-45dd-9425-d149089515ab
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Bakery Fire
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Who is the quickest draw in the ocean? Billy the Squid.
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0efbad3c-5b35-433a-a984-52de7edafa07
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Wanted For Eight Armed Robbery
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My cat just threw up on the carpet. I don't think it's feline well.
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9d92295e-7b21-402a-bc34-504c7ebbac29
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You Have To Be Kitten Me
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I asked the checkout girl for a date. She said "They're in the fruit aisle next to the bananas."
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47cf657b-8d0a-43f8-a47a-2981efa93db8
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Checkout Girl
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Whiteboards are remarkable.
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8cf94093-4194-4abb-851a-3190f5876d41
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Whiteboards
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What is the richest country in the world? Ireland. Its capital is always Dublin.
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61642a2b-4348-4e9f-bd20-dfefbc618519
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If You Count Alcoholics As Wealth
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A red and a blue ship have just collided in the Caribbean. Apparently the survivors are marooned.
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ac158965-d90d-4b79-94c1-3b00dc22c324
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Color Me Concerned
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Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.
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4970b3b4-3e8d-4d2c-9c62-9e2930c25826
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You Can't Handle The Ending
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I've deleted the phone numbers of all the Germans I know from my mobile phone. Now it's Hans free.
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8007fbad-03cb-482a-9d4e-ea7cc721b878
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De-Grubered
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I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
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0299eb9b-b4d2-4cfa-8292-0ccd8292bb07
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Kleptomania
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Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
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0009b5e4-adbf-48ef-b124-16a863bac35d
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Golfer Pants
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Where are average things built? In the satisfactory.
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ab84a709-326f-4770-bd18-9ff8f5025de2
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Thing Factory
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Yesterday a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
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051227b9-c981-4722-99e3-3a153c22a3fe
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Thoughtful Clown
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What lies on the ocean floor and shivers? A nervous wreck.
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06bac40c-ee53-4122-856a-dee04a99ad80
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These Jokes Have Sunk So Low
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What do you call a sketchy Italian neighbourhood? The Spaghetto.
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f694783c-4b67-40a5-a451-b56c57b7c580
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Italians
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What was Beethoven's fifth favorite fruit? Ba-na-na-na.
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0957a0bf-8ea0-4b2b-aae3-e46dca9d5bae
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Beef Oven
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How does a burglar get into your house? Intruder window.
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7ff5b927-e7b4-4dbe-ba58-f1e5a17d7ac2
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Burglars
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People keep making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
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0790c324-7538-42fd-93bd-af0d354d8368
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The End Of The Joke
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Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera.
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2fdb2916-e33b-45c1-87ce-1200fa581f3b
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Clean Vocals
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Last night me and my girlfriend watched three movies back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the TV.
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cc112fd2-6eb7-4a76-bb92-c66e064b1180
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A Wall Of movies
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Doorbells, don't knock 'em.
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8820ebd8-21ab-43de-aa1c-442d488ef065
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Doorbells
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A proton, an electron, & a neutron walk into a bar. The proton orders a shot, drinks it, pulls out his wallet, and pays the bartender. The electron orders a shot, drinks it, pulls out his wallet, and pays the bartender. The neutron orders a shot, drinks it, then pulls out his wallet. The bartender stops him and says, "for you, no charge..."
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bc3d7a48-0ecc-4a70-a4b4-f34f83465245
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No Charge
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What do you get when you run over a bird with your lawnmower? Shredded tweet.
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2a528ebe-8e66-4908-8930-0778f9385770
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Lawnmower Bird-Man
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How do you count cows? A 'Cow'culator
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4fd6156b-7c92-4923-bec1-81e81fb15a81
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counting cows
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What's the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.
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b3029129-7985-4bb0-a98b-31602741bb23
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Swiss Cheesey
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A Mexican magician says he'll disappear on the count of 3; "Uno... dos... poof...". He disappeared without a tres.
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b5414a1f-0b06-4f06-a08d-ab2599b049ac
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Uno Joke, Por Favor
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Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth. It's pasteurized before you even see it.
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37f952de-ce70-4ac8-b251-08be7f3732b1
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Milking Fast
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I used to be a banker but I lost interest
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fd34db50-820c-4388-b45f-7f97de782355
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Banking
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What do you get if you drop a piano down a coal shaft? A flat minor.
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8cd3b5ea-a375-43a3-b70a-f1f010a67596
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This Piano Jokes Struck A Chord
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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
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db4c6a4a-e4fc-4591-8e2b-babff8d7abc0
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Watch Your Head
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Today a girl said she recognized me from vegetarian club, but I'm sure I've never met herbivore.
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6f003dcc-d043-4bfd-9967-35b3cc6cf041
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Tasteless Joke
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A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender looks at him and says, "Sorry we don't serve food here."
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64e2fc14-5c1c-461e-bec9-5b98ce1906ec
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Sandwich
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How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for the fresh prints.
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fa5eeda3-a605-4f97-9ee1-f464329f588a
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Bel Air
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What's the difference between a well dressed man on a a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a tricycle? Attire!
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1552cf30-012b-4bf7-8678-b5df56212973
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Well Dressed Bicycle
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How do you make toast in the jungle? Pop your bread under a g'rilla.
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7bae6c84-2c88-41f0-a6a6-60758e8ba4b5
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A Toast To Monkey Jokes
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I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night. It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.
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5fc986ec-8e13-496b-ae6a-2a7ef99629d4
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The Dream Was Deep In Soda Me
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I went to the doctor today and he told me I had type A blood, but it was a type O.
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01abc0a0-b3d7-4676-88ce-941f3e44fcf6
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My Type Of Humor
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Why did the banana go to the doctors'? He wasn't peeling very well.
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3719ac94-ffd9-4dbb-8081-dfb872163e32
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Banana Joke For Scale
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Two atoms are walking down the street. One says, "Oh no! I lost an electron!", The other asks him, "Are you sure?", The first one says, "Yeah, I'm positive"
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ab0be3ec-303e-4064-8146-8b2d102e40dd
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I'm Positive
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I hate perforated lines, they're tearable.
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5037edb1-0d24-4f0b-9dde-48b1a64a0b8a
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Perforated Hatred
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README.md exists but content is empty.
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