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t3_34mh3q
|
tifu
|
TIFU by sharing NSFW
|
was chilling with a friend vaping 25e... we'd done so everyday for the past few days so at this point it did little more than a cup of coffee, but it still provided a nice little energetic boost.
some other fellow walks up to the couch we're on in the yard and asks if he can partake. we tell him thats his choice and warn him that we are not smoking crack or meth or something more orthodox, but rather a 25NBO compounds crystals. we implore him that although we are consuming the shit, he should be aware doing so is horrendously stupid due to its power and unpredictability.
the fellow decided he was intrigued and sucked a puff of shit out of the bulb before my friend and i wandered off to get cigarettes.
when friend and i returned we discovered this adventurer in tighty whiteys babbling no english on the couch. apparently while coming up he stripped and incoherently propositioned an (UGLY) tranny before losing awareness of the world around him and being laid ona couch.
unfortunately our adventurer was over 6 feet tall so an ambulance was summoned, as we could not cope with him if he got back up...
popo came with and were not amused, but 25e is not scheduled so they left with the ambu..
tall boy came back from the er and told us all about it some hours later oddly enough...
|
don't smoke 25xNBOx's, certainly don't smoke them with regularity, certainly don't pass the smoking instrument to a curious bystander.
|
t3_t8bnp
|
AskReddit
|
Chronic Plaque Psoriasis Question
|
First off, I am putting this in AskReddit because I was unsure as to which subreddit would yield the best answers.
Anyway, I have a friend who has chronic plaque psoriasis and her medication is too expensive for her insurance benefits to cover for a full year, so she gets about 4 months of shots per year. The other 8 months she tries to eat a proper anti-inflammatory/Mediterranean diet which is supposed to ease the issues brought on by the disorder. What I am trying to figure out is what foods are beneficial to psoriasis sufferers and which foods MUST be avoided? We have done a lot of research together and the internet is full of mixed opinions, so I chose to see what reddit has to say. Thanks!
|
friend has plaque psoriasis and needs to know what foods she can eat ie: Animal Protein, Just fish, no alcohol, etc...
|
t3_1qnfxe
|
relationship_advice
|
Apparently I'm (29M) good at sex, and I just can't accept that.
|
My wife and I have been together for 6 years. We met at a BDSM club, so needless to say, that's been a part of our sex life this entire time. Now I made an effort to understand what makes her tick in the bedroom, as anyone would, but I never felt like I was doing anything particularly good.
Fast forward to the recent past, and my wife and I, after talking for quite a while about it, decided to morph what we have into a polyamorous relationship. On my end, I went on a couple dates, one progressed to making out, and she was seriously into me. Bafflingly so to be honest. In the end, she couldn't handle the actual poly part of the relationship etc, etc, so we parted on good terms. Now, I met another woman, B, who is my girlfriend now. We've had sex a couple times now, and she just goes goddamned crazy on me, and afterwards she makes it a point to tell me how great it was.
Like I said... I don't see what I do as having any degree of actual proficiency. If I were a woman, I would imagine that I would be quite frustrated with me actually. I can't seem to focus, my wrists, fingers, knees, and spine are all injured from working on my feet my adult life, so I have almost no stamina. The only thing that makes any sense to me is that I'm confident in what I'm doing, and why I'm doing it, but even then, it just doesn't seem to add up.
|
How the hell am I supposed to accept the fact that I'm good at sex when everything I see points to the contrary?
|
t3_38gxhx
|
relationships
|
Me [27 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of one year, are having issues because of lack of communication. In basically one day, another woman [20] made me feel and be aware of what I'm lacking. I feel like I need outside opinions to see what I should do.
|
Well, like the title says, I'm in a relationship with someone several years younger than me and we've been having communication issues. In what area are we having issues you ask? Well, everywhere :P
At the beginning of the relationship I figured our age difference affected our conversational chemistry or her confidence in talking to me openly about things, but more and more I realize this is not the case. This was made blatantly clear when I was in training for a new job I'm going into where I met a woman [20] who I instantly clicked with and we haven't stopped talking.
I was shocked into accepting that something is wrong when in the span of two days I had more fun and enjoyable conversations with an almost complete stranger than in the year I've been with my girlfriend. Now I don't know what to do, but I feel like I should do something.
I've tried talking to my SO multiple times about communicating with me, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. I've told her that, despite us being healthy in our sex life and supporting each other in many other ways, I need to be able to talk with the person I'm with. Without communication and understanding how the other person is feeling and thinking, well... the relationship stagnates.
My SO makes me feel happy. Very happy, but I fear that this lack of communication, in every sense, will doom this relationship eventually. I would appreciate any and all advice.
Thank you guys :D
|
Met a wonderful young woman who had me laughing and thinking and smiling for entire days, and now I don't feel like I'm getting the level of communication I need from my GF. Should I end it?
|
t3_1ijy25
|
relationships
|
I don't know how I (22/M) should handle my GF's (19/F) attempts at self-pity.
|
I'm at a loss of what to do or how handle the situation when it comes up which is getting more and more frequent.
If there is an issue between us and we both know that i'm in the right, it seems that's shes so stubborn that she will try and turn the situation around on her instead of just apologising and moving on.
She will start saying things like "Anything else i did wrong?"
"It's because i'm shit isn't it?"
"You can add that to my list of faults"
"why are you even with me when i'm obviously such a horrible person"
When she does this it basically feels like i'm trapped. On one hand if i stop what i'm saying and comfort her, tell her that she isn't any of those things and that i still love her then the issue at hand isn't resolved, nothing is fixed; she is comforted but nothing has been done to fix the problem. Then on the other if i continue to tell her why i'm angry or pissed off then she gets emotional and starts yelling at me for not caring about her feelings or "kicking her when shes already down".
Any advice you can give me?
|
GF is too stubborn to admit when she's wrong and starts putting herself down in order to turn the argument into about her feelings
|
t3_ukl3a
|
AskReddit
|
Trying to find an article about the Wu-Tang Clan
|
Long story: My brother is a huge Wu-Tang fan. He is constantly reading about them. He and his wife just had their first child.
I am a librarian, and jokingly told him that I will have to keep up with his Wu-Tang research for him as he takes care of his son when I sent him an article about GZA teaming up with Neil DeGrasse Tyson to do a science inspired album. He loved the article and took me up the research offer. Specifically he is looking for an article that he read written by a new parent and Wu-Tang fan, it was about how to talk to your kids about foul language in hip hop.
Now I feel like shit because I can't actually find the article. It sounds really interesting, especially now that he is a father.
So now, I'm putting the question up on reddit, and hoping another Wu-Tang fan out there might be able to help...
|
Looking for an article written by a new parent and wu tang fan, it was about how to talk to your kids about foul language in hip hop
|
t3_17uko7
|
relationships
|
Need advice: I'm (F20) starting to feel as if my SO (24) doesn't respect me.
|
So we have been dating for over a year and lately it feels like he just doesn't respect me or my feelings.
I'm having a hard time putting my feelings into words so please bare with me.
The particular incident that has set this off in my head happened yesterday. He likes to go on this website that I absoultely abhor, I have asked him plenty of times to please not go on it when I am around as it does upset me. Yesterday we were laying in bed doing our seperate thing and he went on this particular website with earphones in. I asked him not to once again because even though I cannot hear what is going on, he can't stop his reactions (as in gasping or making loud exclamations about things). Which in turn makes me want to know what is going on, which tends to end in either me either wishing I hadn't seen or him telling me that I don't want to know.
Anyway that ended in a bit of a fight and it just made me think about all of the times where he has said something or something has upset me and he just doesn't seem to care or belittles my feelings, the only time he really listens to how something makes me feel is when it's already gottent to the point where I am in tears or yelling at him.
There is more little things but at the moment I just can't concentrate enough to type anything that makes sense. I love him to bits and have no intention of breaking up with him, I just want a way of making him understand how upset something makes me without me needing to be crying.
|
I feel like my boyfriend basically has the emotional capacity of a teaspoon not sure how to make him understand how I feel without me crying my eyes out.
|
t3_1nv8v9
|
AskReddit
|
My parents think I'm a prostitute... what should I do?
|
I found a folder of old coins in my house (which is really old) and sold them for 1000$ to a local coin dealer (after doing research). My parents didn't know about it. I didn't tell them at the time and I feel bad, but they had no clue it existed.
I saved up the money and got a laptop from my best buy credit card for $500 because my other one was broken. I forgot they send the bill in the mail and my parents saw it was all paid off.
I told them about the coins, I thought they believed me. Later on my dad left his laptop open and I went on to check something before class. He left his email up and I saw my name in a conversation with my mom. I opened it (invasion of privacy I know) and they were conspiring on how I could be a gay prostitute who sleeps with guys for money.
My dad has been giving me weird looks lately and has been suspicious of me going out. I just don't want to confront him saying i'm not a f***in prosistute. It'd be extremely awkward and it would show I was snooping.
I haven't had a job in a year because i've been focused on school so he doesn't know how I got all that money. I saved the money for a while so I have no evidence of proof of selling it.
Is there a way out of it? Or are my parents going to think I'm a prostitute forever?
|
I got a 1000$ in coins, now my parents think I'm a prostitute because they don't know where I got the money from. Or believe that I sold coins to get it.
|
t3_uqjfs
|
AskReddit
|
Reddit, did my friend almost witness a frog massacre?
|
Friend went outside and saw some frogs in unfinished pond (okay, she's embarrassed and doesn't want me to say it is an old bathtub she intends to make a garden tub literally in her back yard...and it will be pretty cool in her defense...eventually), got closer and realized there was a smaller frog in the mouth of a larger frog (head sticking out of bigger frog's mouth). There were two other little frogs that were in the tub trying to get out (hopping up the side, sliding down, it was kind of pitiful as she put it). As she picked up the little ones to help them escape, the big one went to the drain and shoved its face in the dirt in the drain (tub is in the ground) with the little frog still in its mouth. She picked up the big frog, which still had the little frog in its mouth. She tried to save the little frog and the big one would NOT let it go. Then she had to go back to work, so her incredible saga ended with only more questions.
|
friend saw big frog with little frogs, one little one in its mouth, she seriously wonders whether it was eating it, and wants me to askreddit...I told her at a minimum, the answers would be entertaining.
|
t3_3q0fuq
|
Dogtraining
|
Trouble reading body language of rescue dog.
|
I adopted a gorgeous one year old female Wolfhound X Australian Cattle Dog from a rescue yesterday, she was roughly abused in her previous home which has lead her to be extremely timid and distrusting of people (no aggressive signs thankfully) and very small considering her breed (smaller end of cattle dog).
The rescue was not able to get her a foster home and only had her at the kennel a week or two so they have very little insight into her nature and personality, So i was wondering if you kind folks had any advice to assist her.
When I went to pick her up yesterday she was very timid and ran away and hid under a car, i had to carry her to our car to take her home, on the trip home she mostly slept (and farted). which was to be expected, being home she still shies away from us and cowers if we're near, we're okay with this taking a long time and already in one day she has made leaps and bounds of progress. she come to us with a lot of coaxing and time, but it's progress and will take time.
The main thing i am worried about is even though she is feeling comfortable with us to an extent already, walking into rooms with us and sleeping. I am having trouble telling if she actually likes petting, she wags her tail when we're near but stops when we pat her, then resumes wagging if we stop.
She also looks away, yawns and licks our hand during petting, she also doesn't make much of a move to engage the petting again.
I've heard this are typical signs that the dog isn't happy or enjoy themselves. which is understandable given her first year of life, but i'm wondering if we should keep petting her in hopes she'll realize in time we wont hurt her, or if it's better for her not to have that stress?
|
My new rescue dog was abused in her previous home and doesn't seem to like petting, should we keep showing her love, or would it be better for her to remove this source of stress?
|
t3_32gwrv
|
relationships
|
I [27m] no longer feel attracted to my girlfriend [25f]
|
Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 1/2 years. Our relationship is awesome. I could not ask for a better girlfriend. We have been talking about marriage, but neither one of us has popped the question yet.
My problem is that I no longer feel sexually attracted to her and it's starting to show in our relationship. For several months, I have found it difficult to get it up for her in the bedroom. She thinks I am just stressed or nervous. I just don't want to have sex with her anymore. I am tired of trying.
My girlfriend hasn't changed her appearance at all. She is white, blond, blue eyes and she is physically active. She is gorgeous. I've dated similar girls since I was in high school.
I find myself being attracted to darker skinned girls (African Americans, Mexicans, Philippinos). I don't know why I suddenly had this change in type. It's very distressing. I want to be with my girlfriend forever.
What should I do? I feel like there's no hope. I have been thinking about breaking it off with her. But it would crush us both. Should I even tell her about my new attractions?
|
No longer attracted to my girlfriend's because of her race. I still love her. But I can't keep this up.
|
t3_3q4375
|
relationships
|
I [22F] am crushing on a [30M] coworker...
|
So. I know how bad/strange that sounds, but seeing as my own parents are 10 years apart, it doesn't register as weird to me. Anyway, I've been at this place for 8 months and I really like this one coworker of mine. He's gentlemanly, kind and VERY intelligent, but rather shy. I truly do not know if he likes me. I'm very bad at telling if he does. What I do know is that he smiles and says hi when he sees me, i catch him staring at me alot (sometimes he doesn't smile then though :( and I've caught him checking me out once) And, whenever I ask him to get lunch with me, he always goes. (however, he himself hasn't asked me yet.) I've been super professional and tried really hard not to stare at him and just focus on my work. I think he thinks I don't like him now...but I've found a new job and will be leaving in a few weeks.
Should I ask him out on my last day? I'm not even sure if he'll be ok with it, given our age difference. Would guys be offended if a girl does that?
Part of me is worried he'll parade it around the office if I do so. Also, just really not sure if this is ok. For those of you who've met your s/o at work, how did that happen?
Oh, and clicked his schedule and saw that he'd marked "stepstools_are_mybff's last day"....he did that not me, and I didn't tell him when my last day would be
I might:
A. Write my number on a post it note and just be like "here's my number if you want to stay in touch"
B. Write out a cute little card about how I think he's smart/awesome and add my number...basically showing all the cards
?????????
|
crushing on soon to be former co-worker, afraid to ask him out. Should I just let this one go?
|
t3_2znudh
|
relationships
|
Me [30F] with my SO[25M] 5 months, guidelines for seeing ex?
|
My SO's last relationship ended when his ex cheated with his best friend. Obviously, he was very torn up over this. However, he misses and loves this friend, and wants to repair the friendship. I haven't met this guy, and honestly don't have a very high opinion of him considering what he did. He's also flaked several times when they've made plans in the past few weeks/month. But I want to be supportive, and I want my BF to be happy.
My issue is that this friend is still dating my BF's ex. I can't see how they can renew their friendship without him spending time with the ex, and that makes me a little uncomfortable. I feel like I am being ridiculous because I trust him completely. Clearly though, this ex is a cheater, and I'm afraid she might be the type to make moves on him. Would it be unreasonable for me to request that if the ex id's present, that I also be included? I don't in any way want to hamper his friendship with his one-time best friend. I don't want him to think I don't trust him. The ex thing just makes me feel a little uncomfortable. Advice, please?
|
Boyfriend's ex cheated with his best friend. Now BF wants to start hanging out with friend again, who is still dating his ex.
|
t3_3o47pv
|
relationships
|
Need advice on use of words my bf [23M] of 8 years uses towards me [23F] in arguments – he is belittling me?
|
I have recently graduated university and looking for work. I am mostly stuck inside all day as I have 0 money to use outside. I stay with my bf at his place and he works. During arguments he will sometimes say this to me 'I don't sit on my ass all day doing nothing, I have work to go to' during arguments and it always makes me feel like shit. He will say that it's true I do this, which hurts my feelings. I am job searching and trying to stay sane with the isolation of being inside all the time.
Is his use of language belittling? I feel it's a power move, to try and gain power over me. And how can I let him know that I don't like it?
|
bf mentions in arguments I 'sit on my ass all day' while he works. It makes me feel like shit. Is this belittling language? And how to get him to stop?
|
t3_2paavy
|
relationships
|
Are our mutual friends trying to hint that he [24 M] likes me [22 F]?
|
To begin, I (22, F) have had problems in the past about being oblivious to advances and I tend to be shy.
I was at a friends party when a girl I have met a few times before walks up to me an asked 'have you met Tim?' (My friend's roommate (24, M)). I told we have met, but never talked much. That is when she told me that he is a great and interesting guy and we should talk more. Then she said that he is single then smiled and walked away.
Later that night my friend was telling me how smart and accomplished Tim is. And I saw him looking over my way several times during the night, but he could have just as easily been looking at someone/something else.
I don't really know Tim, but I know we have many interest in common and also he seems like a very extroverted person. So is thinking that he might like me reading into this too much?
|
Mutual friends have recently started telling me how great Tim is and that he is single, but he rarely talks to me. I don't know what to make of this.
|
t3_x2mjo
|
relationships
|
Girlfriend's parents dont want me to date her.
|
I've been dating this girl for a while now and she recently confessed that her parents are making this relationship too hard for her because of my religion (They are christians while I am muslim). While my girlfriend doesn't particularly care about that, but she is fed up with her parents making this near impossible for her.
We are meeting up to talk about this today and I'm afraid she wants to end it (against her will), which won't do any of us good.
I've been thinking about it and I've come up with 2 solutions so far:
- Either we date without her parent being aware of it.
- or She convinces her parents to meet me and maybe they will have a change of heart when they realize I have no intention of converting their daughter whatsoever...
Any other suggestions to avoid ending it??
NB: she isn't able to be independant of her parents yet, she still lives with them, and they are sort of over protective...
Age: 20
Length of relationship: 1.5 months
|
Her parents don't want her to date me because of religion (they are christian while I am muslim). Girlfriend doesn't care about religion differences but she might be forced to end it against her will. Any solutions?
|
t3_2cg25g
|
relationships
|
Me [33F] with my BF [33 M] 2 years, found out he cheated & now he is telling friends I was stalking him
|
My bf cheated on me & the reason I know this is because my gut told me something was off so I checked up on him. We dated for 2 years and I knew his habits very well so it wasn't hard to catch him. Last time I saw him, I acted cold but didn't confront him. This happened last week & I went no contact once I had fulfilled some commitments we already had to get my head together. He hasn't reached out to me either but I heard from a mutual friend that he is telling people that I was a stalker & he didn't want to talk to me ever again. I am flabbergasted that he is just saving face & not concerned at all at the relationship. I am hurt on so many levels.
|
BF cheated & is now telling people I am a stalker, should I try to explain myself or keep with no contact?
|
t3_2820ea
|
travel
|
First trip to France - concerned about strikes - Advice please! (crosspost from /r/france)
|
My wife and I have been planning and saving for a trip to France for the past 6 months. We're bringing our two young daughters along as well.
I am very disheartened by the various strikes that continue to be announced and I am concerned that it will impact our trip negatively. We're flying into Paris (CDG) on Air France (arriving on Monday morning). Now Air France ground crews at CDG have just announced a strike. I was already concerned with getting to the city center from the airport due to the rail strike, but now it seems that we may have delays at the airport as well. I've been considering the Roissy Bus or Air France's Les Cars as options for getting to the city center instead of RER B, but with the Air France strike I am thinking that maybe the buses will be affected as well (at least Les Cars). I'm also aware that there is an ongoing taxi strike which will slow down bus travel anyway. We'll be heading to Lyon via TGV later in the week, but last I checked there were no delays on that line at least and then we'll have a rental car for the rest of the trip after that.
Regardless of what happens, we'll make the best of it. We've been looking forward to seeing Paris and Provence for quite a while.
|
Flying into Paris on Air France and it seems that workers from every mode of transportation are on strike ಠ_ಠ
|
t3_12t5gn
|
relationships
|
My boyfriend (22M) won't stop berating me (19F) because I voted for Obama and "Ruined History".
|
Yeah, it's pretty much what the title says. I was stupid enough to tell my boyfriend that I was happy Obama won and he has been harassing me about it nonstop since. We live together and I'm eight months pregnant with a little girl. Of COURSE I was going to vote for Obama, there's no way I'd want my child to live in an America where Romney could start stripping away women's rights, beginning a domino effect which would likely become a huge clusterfuck bringing the female population back to the 1800s by the time my daughter's old enough to need to worry about it.
He sadly voted for Romney... which was his right as a citizen and I don't really have a problem with. What I DO have a problem with is how he's reacting to his guy losing and the fact that he is being so disrespectful of me because I don't share the same political views as him. He won't even let me watch the news and grabbed the remote out of my hand, shut off the TV and told me that I could spend "all day watching liberal shit, just save it for when I'm not home". He told me he was going to deduct "presidential tax" from the allowance he gives me, laughing that "Obama will take care of your baby now, guess you and the baby don't need my money anymore!" (All of the money he gives me goes directly to my medical bills and GAS to keep my appointments. Being pregnant is not CHEAP!)
Before Obama won my boyfriend was talking about marriage and excited to have a child with me, now he wants me to "just give her up for adoption" and is talking about kicking me out of the apartment.
I don't know what to do anymore or what to say to him to get him to be more reasonable. Help?
|
Boyfriend can't stop complaining about Obama winning and doesn't want to help pay for my pregnancy anymore because I didn't vote for Romney like he did.
|
t3_4f4zyn
|
jobs
|
Should I quit my job without notice?
|
So I am currently at a restaurant job. I loved it the first few months, but there seemed to be a HUGE amount of teenage drama (literally, they were all highschoolers fighting with one another) and I mentioned it to my boss due to the fact that I would have guests come up to me complaining about it. My boss then took my confidential conversation and told pretty much everyone in the workplace about it, so I was constantly under stress as that created a lot of tension.
Flash forward to this past week, I had two interviews and was offered both jobs on the spot, and accepted both. I went into work on Thursday and gave a two weeks notice, but apparently my boss AGAIN went around the place and let everyone know about it. On top of that, he took me off the work schedule other than having to work two days this coming up week.
I have been feeling seriously sick to my stomach about this since I didn't want anyone to know about it, and wanted to go peacefully, but I feel so disrespected by my boss and coworkers. So my question is, would it be better to quit without notice or to just stick it out? I am in an "at-will" employment, but honestly I am confused as to what that even means.
|
Hate my job, my manager likes to give away confidential info about me to coworkers, and now I am wondering if I should just quit.
|
t3_3w5zmb
|
Advice
|
Getting married- need advice about our name change
|
In a nutshell- my mother's family ("jones") has no surviving heirs that will produce children and her direct family line will die out. I would like to take her last name and hyphenate it with my future spouses ("king"). He will take this last name as well (we will both be the jones-kings).
Why I need help: I don't want to be a dick and make my dad upset. He is assuming I'll take my new spouses name anyway, but here I'm afraid what I'm keeping will be what hurts. *But* it is so important to me that my new name is reflective of the family I'm creating and includes both our names. I've been using my maternal last name hyphenated with my paternal last name since high school (jones-stephens). I'm not sure how to be delicate about this or if I should just forget the whole thing and hyphenate. In other words: help!
|
should I be the jones-kings like I want or should I suck it up and be the bass-kings to make everyone happy and family reunions less awkward.
|
t3_fu6hh
|
relationships
|
Major dilemma between my girlfriend of 2 years and a girl I just met this semester. Help me, please.
|
I'm a 20 year old college student who's been dating a girl a little over two years now. Probably closer to two and half. We've known each other since high school. I just met a new girl this semester and I'm really starting to like her.
Now, I feel like some of the love between me and said girlfriend is gone... At least on my end. She still adores me but I'm starting to lose it for her. And I can't bring myself to break up with her because she makes me feel like I'm the only thing holding her life together.
This other girl, on the other hand has some terrible issues of her own, but they are just medical issues outside her control. She's always upbeat and just awesome to be around in general, not down most of the time like my current girlfriend.
What do I Reddit? Please help me. I've been feeling like crap recently because of this.
__
|
Losing love for my nearly always sad girlfriend of two years who loves me for this new girl I met this semester.
|
t3_1kji9f
|
relationships
|
I [24F] just saw that my boyfriend [23M]of almost two years contacted his ex about old pictures he found of them?
|
Hi
I 24F just saw that my bf sent his ex gf (they broke up four years ago) a message on facebook about finding a cd of pictures and videos of them and asked if she'd want it? He also asks if she'd have anything like that he might want.
We haven't been getting on this week, rowing, I saw this this morning, the laptop had died so when I powered it up it was there. Should I ask about it or wait and maybe he'll tell me? I feel it's something he should tell me. He would be mad if it was the other way round.
I feel confused and worried. Am I wrong to? Please help. I don't want to row with him over it. The ex gf is also in a relationship with an old best friend of his.
|
Saw a message from my boyfriend to his ex girlfriend. They didn't remain friends when they broke up and he ended it. Feel confused over it.
|
t3_5016tl
|
relationship_advice
|
Affection between friend's fiancé and me making things awkward
|
A good buddy of mine proposed to a woman a couple years ago fairly quickly. The first time all of his friends and I met her, she and I had an immediate, witty rapport. I think everyone noticed.
If I had to make an over generalization, I'd say they have a great physical connection with a pretty classic male-female dynamic, but lack a bit on the understanding and intellectual connection. Perhaps she feels closer to me in that respect.
So we're all close, we're usually all pretty dang happy to be around each other but, sometimes, I think he feels threatened by it, or she uses it as a bit of a threat herself, or I take her side too much... it's all really subtle and unspoken at this point and I have no interest in escalating.
So, should I just bow out and limit my contact with them for a while? It'd be nice to not have to lose closeness over it, but I don't want to get in the middle of anybody's relationship.
|
my friend's fiancé and I get along a little too well sometimes, which leads to subtle awkwardness in which I don't want to escalate. What should I do?
|
t3_1t8dw5
|
dating_advice
|
Pointers on starting a relationship, long distance(maybe not so long depending on your outlook)[M/19]
|
I am a male 19 in college and the girl I like lives a state away, I have only had one other relationship before and it was only a short drive down the parkway. I need pointers on how I should go about this, I try texting her but a lot of the times we will get 3 or 4 texts in and then I won't get a response for hours at a time or we text all day and into the wee hours of the night(yes i used the term wee hours or the night). I just don't know what else there is to do, I really do like her I just don't know how to go about starting this up over the distance.
For some background on me, that first relationship I got boatloads of help from my two friends and i didn't actually ask the her out till we were invited to my friends beach house during the summer. It ended pretty quickly for no apparent reason and it kinda broke me for a couple months until I started talking to this girl now.
If you could actually read through this I thank you and also apologize for probably one of the hardest reads you may ever have, I always saw myself as a really bad writer. So don't be afraid to ask any questions if you need clarification on anything.
|
I need pointers on what to do to start a long distance relationship, or should i just wait till i get back to college in 2 months(i have been told not to wait but i would like some more opinions).
|
t3_1y3j6u
|
relationships
|
I [26 M] have recently started hanging out with an old [26 F] friend, always had a crush on her, no clue what our relationship is
|
There was this girl that I had a huge crush on for a long time back in college. The entire time we were friends she always had a boyfriend. So, I never really made a move, though we did make out a couple times when we were both drunk.
Anyways, I texted her on new years, and the past three weekends she has come up and hung out with me. Once we went out to the bars and she got really drunk and I just took her back to my place to sleep it off. We still had fun, she was just too wasted. The next weekend we went and saw a movie (she paid for both of us), then dinner (I paid). We have a really good connection, there are few pauses, but they aren't really awkward, more comfortable. We went back to my place and talked some more, then I walked her to her car and she hugged me and left.
So these are my questions. How do I find out if she considers these dates? If she doesn't, how do I tell her that I want to date her? I think I'm getting too old to play games and I'd rather just ask her and find out. To me, she's one of those girls who is really hard to read, so that's why I'm here.
Thanks!
|
Old crush back in my life, no clue how she feels about me, want to date her, don't know what to do.
|
t3_3l2495
|
tifu
|
TIFU by sharing my screen
|
Throwaway account for obvious reasons. This morning I was on a WebEx with a member of management (not my manager) and our clients. Lets call her Kim. I was asked to share my screen to show a new report we had mocked up. Things were going fine when the client asked timing on when we could complete this. Kim laughed arrogantly and let them know since they delivered late we were unsure when we could actually get the report completed. This type of behavior is typical of Kim and the client scoffed. Embarrassed by Kims behavior I quickly shot off a IM to my friend. It went as follows:
Me: hate when Kim laughs at the client.
Friend: she does it all the time
Me: Client is concerned about timing and Kim laughs 'well we have other things going on.'
Its so rude!
Friend: i really don't understand why the client likes her
Queue me realizing at this point my screen is being shared and they can see everything I am typing. Call ends and I sit terrified at my desk. I knew Kim was only dialed in and did not see the WebEx, however, the client was viewing the WebEx. Two minutes after the calls ends I receive an email from the client. The exchange went like this:
Client: Was Kim on the WebEx for the last call or just dialing in...?
Me: She was dialed in as she drove into the office.
Client: Good. So she didn't see your screen. You should always shut down your IM before sharing your screen on a WebEx.
Me: I sincerely apologize. I had thought my screen was no longer being shared. I'll make more careful in the future.
Client: No need to apologize. It looked like you were sticking up for me.
|
Shared my screen on a WebEx, sent a not so nice IM to a coworker, client saw IM, still have a job.
|
t3_1tpn2o
|
relationships
|
Me [32 M] trying to figure out protocol for calling/texting girl after given her number.
|
Monday I was working and this girl came into my store. I am pretty weird about trying to pick up girls at work because A) I think it can come off as super creepy, B) I don't want to lose my job. But the more I helped her the more I got a vibe that she would be cool with it. Finally, my shift was over and as I was leaving I asked if it would be cool if I called her sometime. She eagerly agreed and gave me her number. Then later on that night at a bar with friends, someone told me they wanted to set me up with a friend of theirs. They gave me her number, but as it was late and I was drunk advised not to text/call her immediately.
As it was Christmas Even and Christmas today I haven't thought it would be appropriate to contact either girl. I have never been good at this whole waiting period thing. I don't understand the rules about how long you should wait before initiating contact and once you do initiate contact, should I ask her out or do the text/ call thing back and forth for a bit? I hate the games but I have scared off girls before by being over zealous. Should I just let the weekend go and try to talk to them Sunday or Monday? And would it be presumptuous to ask about doing something New Years Eve? Any help would be appreciated.
|
How long is appropriate time to wait before contacting a girl after she gives you her number and what should that first contact consist of?
|
t3_20kofv
|
relationships
|
Me [29F] my partner [33M] of 4yrs' Dad disapproves of me because of my appearance. Need help dealing with this.
|
I've been with my partner for 4 years. We live together and this is it for both of us.
The main issue is that recently his Father is becoming more and more vocal to my partner about his immense dislike of me - he feels I have "no pride in my appearance" - because I'm definitely on the heavier side. Now, he's always thought this of me - even when I was 60lbs lighter! (weight gain is due to the loss of my Dad and the depression / meds that I am on to treat that) so his reasoning makes no sense since I was roughly a size 10 for the 1st 2 years of our relationship.
My partner's Mom is fantastic and she really likes me. His brothers seem to like me as well - it's just his Father. We recently spent the weekend with his parents and even though one of his Father's main complaints is that he doesn't know me, he spent the entire weekend ignoring me! He does this every time I am there and if he does speak to me it's only to put down my job (fulltime, pays well) or to disagree on the fact that we live in a city and rent instead of owning. I am always very polite and even though I am very hurt by all of this I keep putting forward the efforts so he can get to know me better.
This is really hurting me and my partner and I need advice on how to deal with this.
|
My partner's father disapproves of me because of my appearance / he thinks I'm too fat to be with his son.
|
t3_336b92
|
relationship_advice
|
Should I [17M] talk to my Ex [16F] about when we were dating?
|
Alright so background here.
Me and my ex had liked each other for a little while, then we started going out. It only lasted about 2 weeks, but even so it ended sort of badly, with the two of us not talking for a good 3 months or so afterwards, because it was just that awkward. We started talking again recently because I finally got the nerve to say hi, but I still feel as if there's stuff left unanswered or unsaid, and maybe a bit of awkwardness left. That, and I still really like her.
So what I'm wondering is if it's a good idea to ask her about what happened during our relationship to make her wanna break it off, considering how we're still at an awkward after stage. In fact should I ever talk about it again? Again considering I still like her?
|
dated girl, broke up bad, still like her, still akward, started talking,should I talk about our relationship?
|
t3_3haioz
|
relationship_advice
|
I (22/f) am the bad guy here, it was beyond horrible and I know it but i need some advice and insight. (25/m)
|
So before I get started I acknowledge that I am a fucking idiot and I am not excusing my behavior. I also know that this will get a lot of hate.
Ok. So I have been seeing my boyfriend for a while now. We get a long great and I spend several nights at his apartment. Also a bit of background, he is from Guatemala and I am american.
Well Saturday we were at his apartment, celebrating his childhood friends birthday. Just us three. I brought some vodka over and everyone was having a good time. Now Im sure I passed out but honestly it is fuzzy. I drink vodka often but usually flavored and this time it was regular. I got ahead of myself.
Apparently his friend yelled at him for being stupid over something. And my b/f went into his room and slept I am asuming. At some point he came out and saw me and his friend fucking. I honestly do not rememeber that. Not even a little.
I am just confused after he told me what happened he just kept saying he was sorry for bringing his friend. And how it was all his fault. I definitely remember them fighting but I was so out of it I had no idea why. Now he is acting normal. Also english is not his first language so I dont know if Ill ever really know everything that happened.
He isn't acting like he should. Atleast I dont think so. I mean it was probably pretty tramatic. He just insists he is at fault and told me to forget it.
How do I handle this? I do feel betrayed by his friend a bit but in the end I know if I had paced myself better this would not have happened.
Also why would he act normal? Im just confused all around.
|
My boyfriend saw me fuck his close friend in a druken haze and is acting normal. I am at a bit of a loss.
|
t3_45o1dz
|
relationships
|
My [16M] girlfriend [18F] is troubled and I want to help
|
So something has happened and I think it has to relate to when her nudes were leaked a couple years back, although I am not sure, she says that something happened and she isn't talking to anybody and she is depressed, but she won't tell me about it, I can't just walk up to her door, she lives far away, I want to know how to approach her and how to make her feel better, she isn't telling anybody whats going on and I really want her to open up to me, but she says she can't, she finds it extremely hard. Any advice is appreciated, thanks!
|
Girlfriend is troubled, won't tell anyone (not even me) and I want her to tell me and help her out
|
t3_e7o9d
|
AskReddit
|
The "Finale" to Harry Potter should be 1 movie and not 2...discuss please
|
I just had an argument with my gf about the latest Harry Potter instalment. My thinking is that it's bs to split the last book into two movies and it's clearly a money grab to extend the franchise.
Gf got mad at me and said that I promised I would take her and it's bs for me to renege. Without getting into that aspect of it, do you guys think it is OK for a franchise that has generated $7bn in world-wide sales to cynically try and rake in some extra dough like this?
People work hard to earn their money and will have to face so much pressure from their kids and significant others to see both movies and will feel guilty if they say no.
The worst part is the ad campaign which boasts that "The finale will begin!" as if we are all a bunch of morons. The finale is meant to be one piece, it is the FINAL act, etc. You can't split the damn thing and still call it a finale.
|
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows should be 1 movie, not 2. It is a cynical money grab preying on people's guilt to their kids and s/o.
|
t3_3a2h9o
|
relationships
|
I [20F] entered in a local contest to win tickets to a popular band and won! My ex [21F] is upset I'm not sure that I want to take her.
|
So, as the title says, I called a local radio station and won a free pair of tickets to a concert of a very well known band. I was in the car with my ex, Kayla, when I called. Kayla and I are still really good friends and see each other almost every day. I care for her deeply and she is one of my best friends.
Here's where it gets pretty tricky. I called the radio station because another ex of mine, Mary [22F] is obsessed with the band playing, I honestly called for her to win the tickets for her because she has been waiting for this concert for a while and was unable to get tickets for herself. She and I are working on repairing our relationship to one another (not being together but being friends like we were before we dated). I should also mention, I absolutely still in love with Mary, no matter what I do I can not get her out of my head.
Kayla didn't know why I called but I did it mostly for a laugh. I genuinely didn't think I would win, but I did. I want to give the pair to Mary and let her go with whoever she chooses as I don't really like the band very much and I don't want to drive to the location of the concert. I also feel like this would be a great good faith gesture towards repairing us. Now, Kayla is upset that I expressed any doubt in taking her but Mary has no idea I have the tickets. If Kayla didn't know I had the tickets I wouldn't think twice about giving the tickets to Mary but she does and I don't want to upset her or hurt her feelings because Kayla and Mary do not like each other at all.
|
I have a pair of tickets to a band I don't want to see, called with the intent of giving the tickets to friend. My ex assumes she's going with me. What do I do?
|
t3_afpdb
|
relationship_advice
|
Dumped, moving on...but which new situation is best for me?
|
I was dumped by someone I was completely and utterly in love with...someone who told me he loved me more than anyone else in his life. I changed everything about what I thought I wanted in a relationship and opened myself up completely to him because that's what he said was important and what he wanted from me. I move in with him.
Two and a half years later, he dumps me. He dumps me for reasons I feel are unfair and partially cowardly and that I believe stems from his simply not being ready to be in a long term relationship and his unreasonable expectations of what relationships are.
So it's a situation where I am completely heartbroken that he gave up on us and he is ready to move on whereas I didn't think it was beyond repair.
So fine. I am really hurting...but I want to move on.
I have the opportunity to pursue one of two new lifestyles for the next few months (as I am now out on my ass and need to find a place to rebuild my life and confidence). Based on the background I have given you, which of the following scenarios would be best for me?
a) Living in a duplex, party-house style place, with two super laid back guys, off Campus, but literally within ten blocks of where my ex lives. Place isn't that nice, but not bad (just nothing special).
b) Living in a dorm-style apartment with four other girls on campus. Place is nicer, cheaper than above, super cheap for location.
|
> Got dumped on my ass, looking for a place and have two options. Is living with two guys in a party house or with four girls in a dorm apartment better for my recovery and well being?
|
t3_2cmbcj
|
tifu
|
TIFU By getting fuzzy blankets at Costco
|
Well, I just moved into a new house, so I went to the local Costco to buy large amounts of dishware and fuzzy blankets for my new furniture.
As I was browsing the fuzzy blanket selection, I see a girl who looks amazing from behind (there is no right way to type that).
Being the male I am, I let my hormones take over.
I started to walk towards her and on my way I grab two pairs of jeans off of a stack ( these were a part of my pick-up)
I tap her on the shoulder and start in with the line " excuse me, I can't decide which one of these I like more. Can you tell me-"
Then she turned towards me.
As did the old lady with her.
I didn't know what to say, so I said the first thing that came to my mind.
"Oh my god I didn't know you were fucking retarded!"
I swear to god, everyone just stopped and stared.
This was definitely the time to make my escape. As I turned to run, the old lady started screamig "HELP, THERE'S A PERVERT IN HERE".
I made it out the door and to my car without anyone tackling me, thank god.
Needless to say, I didn't get my fuzzy blankets.
|
Went to get dishware and fuzzy blankets at Costco, accidentally became a pervert who preys on special ed girls
|
t3_1hznnx
|
relationships
|
Me[18M] with my SO [19/F] let's people into her lives that don't care about her depression
|
A little background on my girlfriend and I. We dated for three years in high school and continued that relationship into university. She dumped me after she told me that she was diagnosed as depressed and that she couldn't hold down a relationship.
Fast forward a few months we have come back into contact and are back into being physical, telling each other we love each other. When we go to my family get togethers or parties she doesn't say anything when people call her my girlfriend.
My concern is she has let someone into her life who she met when we were broken up. He and her hang out quite often but he has very short patience with her depression. He blames her depression on her family and me while it does not attribute to any of those things. He has called her depression an excuse for attention and calls her stuck up and attention seeking. He openly said he was going to beat up her father. He frequently has arguments with her about her family and harasses her and they stop talking. The next day he sends a text saying he is sorry and they are back to being friends and the cycle has continued about 6 times over the past month. He is extremely clingy, he will get angry when she doesnt answer his texts when she's at work and when shes out he thinks she is out seeing other guys. He has trying to convince her to stop seeing me.
I keep telling her that he needs to stop accepting his apologies but she just says that she is too naive and oblivious and that she doesn't want to lose what little friends she has. I have told her that he won't learn his lesson until she actually tells him to stop talking to her but he continues to harass her and she eventually accepts his apologies.
I am so frustrated right now but I am in no place to say anything since I'm not technically her boyfriend. I don't know what to say or do anymore. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
|
Girlfriend has a friend who constantly harasses her but she keeps accepting his apologies and I am worrying it is detrimental to her health.
|
t3_4hyil6
|
relationships
|
Me [19M] with my girlfriend [19F] 8 moths, I don't know how to feel about her.
|
My girlfriend is a fantastic girl, smart, great personality and cute, when I saw her I immediately fall in love, but now, 8 months later I feel something changed, I'm not even sure if I still love her.
When I'm with her I feel good and happy, but sometimes it get uncomfortable, we're studying engineering so sometimes she just talk about our courses, troubles with calculus or something related. Of course I have some troubles too, but I feel that when she can do something I can't she always says it's pretty easy and sometimes I feel bad, like some kind of dumb.
Also, we have no common hobbies, nor musical tastes, we don't like the same movies or TV shows, I feel the only thing in common is the career and some friends, nothing else. I used to think she listen to me when I talked about my stuff (computers, games, classical music) but once I notice she didn't listen to me, she just pretends, I noticed when I asked something I just said and she just said "I don't know, I'm hungry", I feel sad, because I was trying to explain myself so she get interested in the topic.
She recently started getting jealous and stalking my Facebook just because I added a girl and liked one girl who looked like a model picture, I mean, is just one click and she was really angry and didn't talked about it to me.
What do you think of this relationship? I feel something for her, but sometimes she get me on my nerves, I'm not someone who release his emotions openly or ask for advice to friends, I'm a quiet guy.
|
My conversation with my gf became dull and we have no common interests, I don't know if I still love her. Please give me your advice, how can I be sure about my feels?
|
t3_3a21u1
|
pettyrevenge
|
Might I inquire as to your return policy then..
|
So about a week ago I find myself in downtown Austin visiting my soon to be married best friend who has asked me to be the best man. We have plans to rent a beach house and everyone chipped in about $200 to buy alcohol for the bachelor party.
I had been procrastinating and was running out of time. I saw this sushi restaurant downtown and thought, "I'll park next door in this liquor store's parking lot, by all the alcohol for the trip and then surely they'll let me park there and go eat lunch"
I ring up $1245 worth of scotch, bourbon, vodka and beer and then proceed to pay. The old man at the counter looked like he had the personality of a celery stick. When I got my reciept and everything was loaded into about 6 cardboard boxes I asked him, "hey man, do you mind if I stay parked here for about 30 minutes while I run next door and get lunch?" He looked at me over the boxes of all this liquor and flatly said, "no, unless you're just getting it to go and you'll be back in five minutes or less, I'll tow you"
I looked him dead in the eyes and said, "might I inquire as to your return policy then?"
He looked at me confused, as if he didn't understand the question. "I said, I'd like all of my money back sir". that's when it clicked and he tried to offer the parking spot to me like I had initially requested seeing $1245 going up in smoke. No Dice jack! I made him painstakingly rescan everything while I stared him down.
|
buy $1245 worth of liquor, ask manager to use parking spot to grab lunch next door, he refuses, I return all the alcohol and ask for my money back.
|
t3_4aen9q
|
relationships
|
Me [19 F] with this guy i'm seeing [20 M], he doesn't want labels anymore and I don't know where to go from here
|
So I have been seeing this guy, we'll call him Jack, for about a month, long-distance so we see eachother maybe every weekend. We have been talking, though as friends, for around 10 months, so I felt we were really close and good.
About a week ago, I asked if he wanted to be serious about this and date, and he said yes, and that was that and I referred to him as my boyfriend. I know i was mistaken in being excited, but I haven't dated anyone in a long time.
i spent the night with him a few days ago and in the morning he told me, "I don't think I'm ready for this. Like i want to date and see you and everything, and be exclusive, but i can't do labels yet."
I was kind of taken off guard, so i was at first okay and listened, but later on after I left i needed to get stuff off my chest about it, so i told him and he called me. After a few minutes i asked him why he felt this way - and his words were "I hadn't been looking for a relationship."
I got a bit upset upon hearing this - i am looking for one, and he seems to not be. he could tell I was upset and he said he would call me later this week so we could think, and I ended the call.
I've been torn up all night and day about this, I don't want to end what we have, but I don't like knowing this is all it's going to be. I want to do what it takes to be with him but we haven't really communicated today and I want to call him and let him know I'm on board (even if it means no labels), and apologize for how i reacted.
All my friends keep advising me to wait longer to talk to him, and to give him space, but I don't know because I pushed him away. I Don't know how to bring up this subject and a phone call again without seeming crazy. I just miss him a lot already.
|
Seeing a boy, thought we were official, he wanted to step back and not be, i need to know what to do next about it.
|
t3_3zzr9p
|
relationship_advice
|
I'm [27/m] trying to explain to my [24/F] GF of 1.5 years that I need more space
|
This has always been a point of contention with us because I am in medical school and thus my time is very limited. I study/work in clinic nearly 12-14 hours every day and therefore I have very little free time. She basically is of the mindset that when I have time for dinner or any time away it should mainly be spent with her because I have so little of it.
I am trying to express to here that there needs to be some times when we are apart and I have time to myself. She believes that a truly "happy couple" should want to spend every second together and never be apart. I love spending time with her but want to communicate to her that there are some days where I just don't need to see her.
I have this fear that maybe I don't love her as much as she loves me and that maybe this is a bad sign that I don't want to be around her 24/7. I have tried making a schedule with her regarding week to week activities but I need a good way to express that time apart in relationships as well as some time to myself where I'm not studying and not around her is very necessary.
Any advice would be great, thanks
[
|
have very little free time and want to express to GF that some of my free time I don't want to spend with her but this is normal in a relationship]
|
t3_jlkf1
|
AskReddit
|
Wages garnished from my paychecks, for student loans...is there a way to lower the amount or fight this?
|
About $120 gets taken out of every paycheck, because I owe for student loans. It's keeping me living paycheck-to-paycheck, and I'm hoping I can lower that amount or stop this. You can skip the rest if you have some advice beyond "ask them to stop."
It used to be they'd garnish wages for 3 months, stop for 3, etc. Now it's a constant $240/month.
Before this started, I talked to them and went over all my bills, and what my average paycheck is. So they know I can't afford this. Their reply was "Okay, how about you give us $3,000 today and pay $300 a month?" after I told them I have no money saved up.
So they bypassed me and with no warning, started this... fully knowing it'd fuck me. I'm wondering if I can fight this somehow, since they won't work with me...any advice would be appreciated, I'd be doing good if I resolved this.
|
can I go above the Dep't Of Education (or whatever these thieves are called) to stop my wages from being garnished?
|
t3_1mla7u
|
relationships
|
Me (22m) and my gf's (20f) is straining from recently moving in together.
|
So me and my gf just moved in together. I moved a great distance to be with her and start a life in a new city. We're from the same place but she moved before I did and our relationship was long distance for the time before I got here. Before I came we were so excited to be together, but now we just seem to fight and get into petty arguments. Reopening old wounds, bringing up irrelevant points, making big issues about nothing, etc. We've come so far and invested so much into each other, I'm dying to make it work.
Lately I've been working so much that I barely see her, and when I do we usually argue about nothing. It isn't all bad, we go out, make each other laugh, have great conversations, great sex, but it's just not the way it used to be. Last night it came to a head in the form of a huge argument and we both got very angry and said awful things we didn't mean, and now things are sort of up in the air until I get off work and we can talk it out. I love her to pieces, but the stress of work and the move is beginning to get to me and I don't think she understands. She has a lot of expectations of me that I can't always deliver because of my long hours and it always starts things up again.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? I feel like the shock of the move and living together is the primary cause, but how do we get past it, together? I can provide more details if possible, I'm trying to keep it brief. Thanks in advance.
|
We recently moved in together, I'm stressed from the new city and work, and we're fighting a lot. Anyone have done advice?
|
t3_1qstsl
|
relationships
|
I'm a [21/F]. I lose feelings / get over guys I date like clock work. Will I always be like this?
|
No matter how wonderful or good looking or fun my boyfriend is I will, without a doubt, always end up losing my feelings for him within the first 6 months. I'm currently dating a 21/M who is funny, sweet as all hell, so good looking and just an all around great boyfriend. It's not even been 4 months and I just don't feel like I like him anymore. Not only that, but I get extremely critical and frankly become mean toward everything he does that bothers me. Things I used to think were cute and silly now bother me so much. This has happened with every boyfriend I've had since I started dating at 16. I just want to know if anyone else is like me and if I'm gonna stay like this. ): I just want to be happy and content with a good thing but I'm just *not*.
|
Always fall out of love with every good guy I date. I don't want to be this way but it's how my brain operates. Will I ever stop being this way?
|
t3_18awbx
|
AskReddit
|
To people that have had good relationships that ended, what can friends do to help you in any way?
|
I am usually able to talk to friends about many issues, with the exception of breakups. Mainly because I've never been interested in relationships or really had the time for one. However, one of my best friends recently broke up with his girlfriend (also my friend) after dating for just over a year, as she was insecure, due to many things currently occurring in her life, and felt that she was not able to be in one anymore. He is one of the best guys I know and their relationship was probably the one positive romantic relationship around me. I have invited his other friend over to mine later this week so we could have a sleepover filled with Tarantino movies, junk food and alcohol. I know he'll move on at his own pace, but I don't know if I should do or say something to help.
|
Is there anything I can say or do to make this poor guy feel any better? Any stories or advice out there?
|
t3_10gwos
|
relationships
|
My husband [22] wants to use every opportunity to visit family in Brasil. Is it selfish to want to go somewhere else?
|
My husband's family (parents and sister) moved back to their native Brasil after his sister's high school graduation last summer. He [22] and I [21] got married about a month before they left, settled down, and he started a pretty decent job.
After putting a decent cushion into savings, and went to visit them for a two weeks in August, which was nice, but now that we're back in the US, he wants to start planning to go down for Christmas. I've tried to subtly put it out there that we just got back, and we don't have another ~$3k and time off of work to do another trip already.
Even if we did, would it be selfish of me to want to go somewhere else? There are so many places that I'd like to travel to, and he's flat-out said that any time/money we can sacrifice to travel should be spent in Brasil.
We've discussed a compromise in that next time we go to Brasil, we'll spend half of the time with his family, and half in Rio/Bahia/Amazonia/etc, but there are other cool places that I'd like to see while we're young and mobile, like Costa Rica or Morocco. Hell, even a week in Florida would be cool.
Please let it be known that this isn't a huge issue (God knows the first reaction in any r/relationships thread is "dump his ass!"), I'd just like to know if it's selfish of me to ask for time doing something away from his family, or if there's a tactful way to bring up the topic. Would you be hurt/offended if your SO wanted to go somewhere else for vacation if you only see family every once in a while?
Sorry for the mess of a post, I'm running off of an all-nighter and Monster, so my brain's foggy.
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I'd like to travel to a variety of places, but my husband wants to repeatedly visit family in Brasil when we have the resources.
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t3_2spnhj
|
relationships
|
I [34/F] am turning 35 soon and need some advice about how to celebrate based on recent changes in my life...
|
So I'm going to be turning 35 in over a month. Every year for the past many many years, I've had big birthday parties at my parents' home where 35-50 friends would come. I would kind of feel like it was my own popularity contest, wanted all my friends to come and if they didn't show up I'd be mad at them.
Over the last few years I've been working more and have become more introverted. The last few years, and even to a lesser extent all the years where I had parties, I would get very anxious beforehand and be super scattered during the parties, not knowing who to connect with because so many great people were there. It was never really a pleasant experience for me but I had these parties anyway.
I've had a great boyfriend for a year and a half and Ive become even more introverted during this time. Never have I socialized so little. So now it's about to be my birthday, and to me 35 is a big one. But I don't know how to celebrate it. I'm thinking something with like 10 people, but then I would feel bad discluding other people.
All of this is part of the bigger problem I'm having which is transitioning from a serious people person/extrovert to being more domesticating, working more and wanting to be alone or with my boyfriend in my spare time. I'm one of those people who collects friends from all periods of my life. And I'm likeable so a lot of people want to be and stay friends with me. Its obviously a good problem to have but it's been stressing me out lately. I don't know how to cut people out or limit social interactions because I truly like everyone. I just don't have the energy for everyone anymore!
I appreciate any feedback.
|
I'm turning 35 and I used to have huge parties for many years. I've become more introverted and don't know what to do for my birthday this year.
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t3_1nl4mh
|
dating_advice
|
How to let a guy down?
|
I recently moved to a new city and got a membership to a gym nearby. I don't really know anyone in the area, so over the past few months I've talked with a couple of the workers who are about my age, but never anything flirty- just normal small talk. Just this past weekend I was planning on moving out of my apartment and asked one of them if they could help me move stuff. He said yeah and gave me his number. However, another friend I had asked earlier said he and his cousin would be willing to help, so I texted the gym worker saying I wouldn't need his help and he said Ok sounds good. Then just last night I was at the gym again and we had a short conversation, but he texted me while I was AT the gym saying "We working on legs today? :)" I've never worked out WITH him before, and I didn't see this text til after I left the gym because I leave my phone in my car. So I just responded "Haha yeah." Then he texted a little more and when I said I was going to bed, he said "Let me know when I can take you out to the movies ;-)" I didn't reply last night then today he texted "Or not lol"
I have no interest in this guy and want to keep going to my gym but I don't want to make things super awkward. What's the best way I can politely turn him down? (He knows I don't have a boyfriend, so can't use that excuse).
|
Gym worker asked me out through text. I have no interest in going out with him, but want to keep going to my gym without making things awkward. Best way to turn him down?
|
t3_4um530
|
relationships
|
My parents, mom [50 F] and dad [53 M], caught me [17 M] with alcohol and I think the relationship is ruined.
|
I was coming back from the beach with my friends and my mom [50 F] went through my bag and found a nearly empty bottle of vodka. We had a talk and they wanted me to snitch on my friends [17 M] for getting the alcohol and I've known these guys for my whole life and I don't wanna snitch on them.
My parents got really angry when I wouldn't tell them who I got it from and they told me that I'm not the kid they thought I was and that they don't trust me anymore. I know I messed up but I bed to fix this, my relationship with my parents is really important to me.
|
i need advice on how to fix this problem and gain my parents trust back and try and get the relationship back to normal.
|
t3_45hdjg
|
tifu
|
TIFU by getting too fucked up.
|
So this happened yesterday, I was trying Tinder for the first time ever and I matched with this girl who said she smoked pot. We met up and had coffee at a hipstery place. She invites me back to her place to smoke weed. I stepped into her place and was amazed to find out she was a hardcore stoner, like I thought I smoked a lot of pot. She had a gravity bong and I had never tried one before. So she let me try it and it was freaking awesome, but unfortunately I got a little too high. I got to that point where I was unable to do anything. I was at a solid 10 and I tried to stand up after taking like 5 really packed bong hits, and I fell over it was super embarrassing. She also totally wanted to have sex, but I was just too High. I Cock-blocked myself and it feels bad man. I had to drive home and just sleep it off I was like full on stoner sloth. Worse yet though, I left my phone and jacket there so I had to go drive back pick it up. This has been the weirdest experience of my life I think.
|
Had too many gravity bong hits,I got too high, tripped major balls and actually like fell over, cockblocked myself, and then left my phone and jacket prompting me to come back to pick them up.
|
t3_u7csn
|
relationships
|
Boyfriend probzz
|
I (20F) have been with my boyfriend (20M) for 6 going on 7 months. I never imagined we'd be together for so long, it started off as a FWB type of thing. All has been well except for these past 2-3 weeks... We left off at college sort of on sore terms. Recently though, I feel as though I am the one carrying the team. He doesn't really talk to me unless I initiate something, and even then he does little to keep the conversation going. I feel like he's living his own problem-free world, but it's stressing because for once! He actually asked how I was doing, and excited me responded in full detail. All he said was, "Cool life story bro." I know this probably seems as such a juvenile problem, and it is, but I have no idea how to tell someone I'm mad or upset. I just let it all boil up and now even the slightest things that he does makes me mad. I'm not a possessive girlfriend or anything, but since i'm already not seeing him until a few weeks or so, it'd be nice to hear from him out of his own will. People are beginning to think he's imaginary. What douz I douz, I'll answer any questions if there are any, I tried keeping this post short since I probably could have written out a 10 page novel.
|
Boyfriend's been really shitty lately, don't know how to bring it up casually since we don't talk that much anyway.
|
t3_crq78
|
relationship_advice
|
Dating guy with a kid a deal breaker? & Do I need to tell guys I'm seeing that I'm not dating them exclusively?
|
I have a couple of questions:
1) What is the consensus on dating someone with a kid or kids? I'm 23 Female...and I am going on a date with a 24 year old (we dated back in high school, nothing serious) who has a 1 year old. I'm not sure about the details of his relationship with Baby Mama (I know they didnt spend a whole lot of time together because he was stationed elsewhere). The kid lives with his Mom on the other side of the country and I'm pretty sure neither parent is planning on moving to be closer to each other. Is him having a kid a deal breaker? Should it be?
2) As a female, I'm reluctant to tell guys I'm seeing that I'm not exclusive with them in fear of being seen as a slut/whore since I know a double standard still exists. Should I still tell them? I'm afraid it will cause them to back off. It's not that I don't want to be exclusive, but I only want to be if thats what they want it to be because I don't want to be seen as a girl that wants to jump into a relationship. How long should I wait before telling them or having the talk I guess? I've never actually had a guy ask me to be his gf or had this "talk." So I don't have much experience with it.
|
dating someone with kids a no-no in early 20's? Should I tell guys I'm dating that I'm not seeing them exclusively? or should I just wait until we have the talk?
|
t3_1vbgdp
|
relationships
|
Me [27F] with my SO [36 M] for 4 years, I broke it off and i am wondering how to deal with the guilt/him trying to get me back.
|
We have been together for 4 years. We have lived together for 2 of those years and traveled for 1. He is currently overseas for work and has been gone for a few months and will be gone for a few more. I've had the feeling that this is not the right relationship for me for a while, but we have always had something planned in the near future and we have SO much fun together so I never broke it off.
This past week I was feeling very stressed and unable to sleep or eat because I knew I had to do something. The conversation just happened because he could tell that something was wrong. This isn't the first time we have talked about me being unhappy, but I still think he was feeling blindsided. He has called me a couple of times since and I have been firm and just apologized a lot as I don't want to give him some false hope.
He is devastated and I feel so awful because he has never really done anything wrong. On paper we look like such a great couple, I just feel like something is missing. Today I got a beautiful email from him basically saying how much he loves me and he knows that we can work on whatever is wrong. I have no idea what to do. I am still pretty sure that he is not the one I should be with, but I am having little doubts now. He wants to give me everything I want in life (a house, a happy relationship and kids) but there is some weird nagging feeling I have.
I guess more than "what do I do?" I should be asking: how do I handle this guilt, and is there anything I can do to make this easier on him?
|
Broke up with my now devastated bf of 4 years - how do I handle the guilt I feel for hurting him?
|
t3_1f2b3w
|
relationship_advice
|
I've been dating a guy for 6 months and he left for boot camp 3 weeks ago. I think he wanted the relationship for the wrong reasons.
|
I'm a 20 year old girl and he's 24.
I've known him through a friend for years. I already knew he signed up for the military when when we started dating 6 months ago.
Here's what irks me:
We started talking a week or so after he had broken up with his previous gf for cheating on him.
Every one of the 4 serious relationships he has had ended up with him being cheated on. (At one point it became clear to him that I am not the cheating type whatsoever)
He was engaged a few years ago (fiancé cheated on him later).
I realized that he doesn't like to be alone and even got him to admit to it.
He worked very, very hard to progress our relationship as quickly as possible before he left. He would text me everyday, shower me with attention, be with me whenever possible, tell me how much he liked me. Miraculously he didn't Come off as desperate. He told me he loved me 4 months in and I said I didn't yet.
About a month later I decided that I loved him too, so I told him. He replied with "if we're still together in a year and can handle a long distance relationship, I wanna get married." Of course he said it a lot cuter than that, but you get the idea. He was leaving in a few weeks so I said sure.
We finally had sex about a week and a half before he left for boot camp. Granted we spent 6 entire days together before he left, but I felt like his demeanor towards me changed after that. It's hard to explain. It seemed like he liked me less because of it.
I'm questioning this relationship because 1.) He may have just been too eager to get a steady relationship going before he left for boot camp. And 2.) His feelings seemed to have changed after we had sex.
|
I'm 20, immature and have no idea what I'm doing. Maybe I'm over analyzing things, maybe he just knows he wants to marry me, or maybe My suspicions are right.
|
t3_1un8nj
|
relationships
|
My boyfriend [27m] and I [25f] never spend time at his place for legit reasons. Is this weird? (Together 9 months)
|
My boyfriend and I have been together 9 months, and it has been amazing. He's my first real relationship (I had mostly just had flings before) and he's had a few year+ long relationships. We like hanging out with each others' friends, my family has welcomed him with open arms, his family lives across the country but I've already met them several times, and we're still at a stage where we can't keep our hands off each other.
As for the issue, he's moved several times since we met. The first two places, he was perfectly fine spending time with me at his place and it was an even balance of who was coming over to visit who. However, his current place is a different story.
He's renting a room in a loft-style apartment. His roommates are a couple who live into the lofted room and they have 2 medium-sized dogs. I think he feels like the apartment is more their territory than his. I've only spent 2 nights there, and one of those was when his roommates and their pets were out of town. Once when we swung by his place to get a change of clothes, I tried to come inside with him but the dogs were being aggressive and he got a bit overprotective and ushered me back into the hallway...
I guess he doesn't feel like we would be comfortable there, and I understand that. However, it still feels weird to me to never spend time at his place anymore! He's hoping to move closer to me and his workplace soon and I think that would fix the situation. Is it even worth saying something now? Especially since I'm not sure he can change anything at the present?
|
My boyfriend never invites me over to his current place because he doesn't feel comfortable there. He's probably moving again soon. Is it even worth mentioning that this bothers me a bit?
|
t3_245wvy
|
relationships
|
Revenge Sex situation gone even worse
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So I have had a thing with this guy for about 3-4 years now. He is 21. I am 20. Long distance. About 650 miles from one another.
Unfortunately, I ended up sleeping with a guy a few weeks ago. I ended up telling my SO about it right after cause I felt bad and apologized. Obviously he was very upset and I spent weeks just constantly telling him how sorry I was about it and that i felt awful for hurting him.
Fast forward and we hadn't spoken for a few days. Turns out, he slept with multiple women for his revenge and to feel better. The next day he comes to me telling me that hurting me wasn't what he wanted and he told me he apparently 'loved' me and all that.
I didn't believe any of it at first, but eventually being the fool I am, his words lured me in. Everything was fine for a weeks then one day he told me he was going to sleep with one of the girls again.
I feel so stupid for believing his words, yet so hurt and betrayed that he's still continuing this. I just need help coping and some words of advice.
|
SO of 3-4 years. I slept with someone. He got his revenge with multiple women, told me he loved me and made a mistake, then continues to have sex with others.
|
t3_3swivq
|
relationships
|
Me [19M] with my GF [18F] 5 1/2 months. She cheated. Wants to work it out.
|
She cheated with me on Friday night. She fooled around with this guy (he was her best friend). She confessed to me last night.
She said she felt immediate remorse and cried right after what happened. And, she wanted to tell right after it happened but she wanted to tell me in person. She said she cried herself to sleep. She cried when she woke up. And, she lost it telling me.
The guy (we will call him Matt) has been causing me some problems before. He made it apparent that he didn't care about the relationship with me and my GF. He flirted her, talked to her a lot and confessed that he liked her.
She said that she really doesn't like him in a romantic way. She said she just did it and it wasn't because she was horny or anything.
She said that she was want to work this out. She said that she will distance herself from him but she said she can not NOT be friends with him because he is the center of her friend group(s) and she isn't very social and it would be hard for her to make friends again (all of which is true; she doesn't have the greatest social skills). She said she will commit more time to the relationship (something I noticed that she wasn't doing; mainly a lot of school stuff on her plate)
She said she believe we could work it out and continue the relationship. Everything was fine in the relationship. There was another time where she was flirting with another guy but she didn't know at the time (her poor social skills played a MAJOR factor in that one).
I am not sure what I want to do.
Right now, I am leaning towards forgive her and working it out. But - I don't know if that is smart.
|
GF cheated on me, told me that day after in person, cried a lot, wants to work it out. Leaning towards staying but Idk
|
t3_2w4v57
|
relationships
|
He [M26] cheated on his girlfriend [F23] with me [F26]. I didn't know at the time. Do I call him out?
|
About a month ago I went on a few dates with a guy I've known for a while. We hadn't seen each other for a while, and at that time he had a girlfriend, but it was over a year before. It was my impression that we were meeting as friends but as the first night went on it felt more like a date. When we parted we made out. I didn't know if he was still dating this girl but after that happened I assumed he wasn't.
On our third date he stayed over at my place and we had sex. He left early the next morning and I didn't hear from him again after that.
Though we did get along, I didn't feel any romantic attraction to him, so when he didn't call me back it didn't really bother me. I was down with just a fun fling.
However, today while hanging out with a mutual friend I saw that this guy was still dating that girl and I found out because she had posted a picture of the dozen roses and poem he wrote her for Valentine's day.
I don't feel hurt by this, but I do feel uncomfortable to be put in the position of the other woman. I think it's really unfair not only to his girlfriend but also to me. Right now I'm trying to debate if I should text him and call him out. If I did I would only say that I'm not trying to tell her and break them up but just that I know and that it was a shitty thing to do.
But maybe I should just do nothing! Especially since I don't feel personally offended by it.
Thoughts? What would you do?
|
Guy cheated on his girlfriend with me. I'm not hurt by it but am trying to decide if I should express to him how shitty his actions were.
|
t3_3msx79
|
legaladvice
|
[CA] New Restaurant Job Does Not Take Tip Taxes from Paycheck
|
Hello,
I just started this new restaurant job around a month ago and my paychecks have been the full amount despite the tips I make. In my previous experiences in my other restaurant jobs, we have to claim how much we make in our tips so it can be properly taxed. This usually comes out of our biweekly paychecks. So our paychecks would be around $200-$300 smaller depending on how much tip we make.
However at this new job, I started working the day after my interview without signing any paperwork, which is a little odd. My first paycheck was the full amount even though I have made tips in the second pay week after I was done training so I thought it was normal. However, my next paycheck was also the full amount but I have been serving and making tip money the whole pay period.
I do write down 100% of what I've made on our little check out sheet and supposedly the manager puts it into the system. I am still relatively new so I am not sure if this is a continuing thing. I just do not want to get in any legal trouble outside of the restaurant.
The other is that when we clock in and clock out, it just shows how many hours we have worked that day but we do not have a tangible print out of the hours we work. I have heard that if any of the servers work more than 8 hours, they will move the hours to a day where we have not worked so we do not get overtime. I don't know how true this because my paychecks do not have any hours I worked. It is just a money paycheck with no other statements with it.
I have talked to my other coworkers about this getting mixed answers. Some say to leave it and they'll figure it out and just keep the money for myself. Another told me to put some money aside just in case I have to pay the restaurant back. One told me that I was working at the restaurant as a contracted payer and not actually on the restaurant payroll.
|
My paychecks are not being taxed properly. I am wondering if the fault will lay on the restaurant or on me when it comes to tax reports. Thank you!
|
t3_2ukecq
|
relationships
|
Me [27F] newly dating [27 M]---his sister is really intimidating and I'm about to meet her.
|
I've started seeing a very sweet guy who I've known for a few years. He has been after me since he met me but I didn't live in the area and now I do, so we've been talking/dating.
Our group of friends (~20 people) is going up for an annual weekend in a large cabin and his sister will be going. Their mother passed away awhile back and I have been advised that she took over as mom and is VERY intimidating towards whomever he is dating. I get why--she is protecting him--and I do not blame her per se.
We aren't an official thing yet but I believe we will be by the time we go up there in a few weeks.
Honestly I don't know how to act....I'm a Detroit transplant in the South so I already feel a little like I may come off harsh compared to the southern ladies. I've already committed a lot of faux pas like not letting dates pick me up and buying movie tickets for my date etc. (My sweet friend looked at me horrified when I told her). I don't know if I should try to befriend his sister, ignore her, stand up to her if she tried to boss me around, or what! I have also be advised that she will definitely try to snoop and 'stalk' me (I use the term loosely).
My instinct is to be guarded and very carefully control what she sees but at the same time there isn't anything wrong with me and I don't like being so scrutinized. I'm a caring, honest, nurturing person. But for instance I brought Cards Against Humanity and our group will be drinking etc so I also don't want to come across too rough if those things are the only observations she has about me....
What do I do, reddit? I don't take kindly to being pushed around. I'm not a shrinking violet and I'm afraid she won't like me.
|
Budding relationship and will be meeting his very protective sister via a long weekend trip and I don't know how to act.
|
t3_48945q
|
weddingplanning
|
Poor venue communication (long stupid rant)
|
FH and I booked our venue back in November 2015. It's not the fanciest place and I had my doubts at first but after looking around and mulling over what we wanted within our budget it was a good fit. One of the big selling points was the venue's wedding coordinator who was reviewed (and we perceived to be) fast and good with communication. If it wasn't for her I would have pushed for my first choice of venue.
In December I contacted the wedding coordinator with some questions, add on requests, and for her to schedule an in-house cake tasting for us. It took her a month to respond to me, and I had to email her twice. When I heard back she said she'd be in touch about cake tasting and sent us the new menu options (which was a whole other meltdown for me). I emailed her back immediately requesting an appointment with her to talk about things and haven't heard back. Once again, it's been a month and two emails sent.
What the fuck! I need to send out invites soon, which I haven't ordered, because I need to ask questions about the new menus! I realize I need to bite the bullet and call her now, but I am seriously disappointed and frustrated. I have major phone anxiety and FH won't man up and call for me, because he does too. He says he doesn't know what he's supposed to be asking or some other bullshit excuse he's using, even though he promised he would call and I've told him it's literally just an appointment to talk about menus.
|
Venue coordinator won't email me back, I'm overly pissy about it. Thanks for reading, it helped to write out.
|
t3_2eyzsg
|
relationships
|
Me [32 M] with my boyfriend [38M] of 6 years, broke it off out of the blue after I made it clear I wanted to get married. Sowing wild oats or midlife crisis?
|
I have a lot of experience with relationships but he was my first love, and my first LTR breakup. Last month, out of no where he says he loves me but isn't in love with me anymore. Incidentally, this came weeks after I was questioning about why he didn't want to get married.
Backstory: He was 32 when I drug him out of the closet, never had experience with men or women. The relationship wasn't perfect, but didn't have any issues that I didn't think could've been easily overcome. In retrospect, it probably was a poor decision on my part to not think that he would at some point want experiences with other people.
After the breakup he would call my friends crying about how much he loved me and how confused he was. All the time he was making it clear to me that he wanted to meet other people. At first I thought it was run of the mill breakup stuff but after reading about mid life crises, his behavior mirrors a lot of the experiences of other people. I left him with love in our last conversation.
Since the breakup I've found out that he is dating much younger people, getting tattoos, staying out until all hours. I want him to have these experiences but he literally became a person (even during the breakup) that I have never met before. My question to you, dear souls of reddit, do I hang around and wait for him to wake up? I truly do love him with all of my heart and I know he cares for me. I'm the one who feels crazy.
|
BF of 6 years becomes a new person and leaves me all the while telling me he's confused. Do I wait and see if he comes around or move on with my life?
|
t3_4e1zik
|
tifu
|
TIFU by confusing David Cameron and James Cameron
|
This happened yesterday. Was getting my haircut. Was talking to my hairdresser about a number of things, then I brought up the topic of the Panama Papers Scandal, wanting to sound smart or something. Now, I had read a number of articles on reddit - or had read their headlines and comments - and thought I had the gist of what had happened. I knew powerful people were involved, celebrities, CEOs, government officials, and David Cameron and his dad.
So what I say to my hairdresser is that they found out that David Cameron, you know, the director of Avatar and Titanic, was involved because his dad was involved. And then I went on to say that the Prime Minister of Iceland stepped down and that the Prime Minister of England was implicated too. Worst was that I wasn't talking to him alone, I was speaking in a room where two other clients were having their hair cut.
Sigh. Thought about it this morning. Realized I am an idiot.
.
|
Told my hairdresser and room full of other clients that David Cameron, director of Avatar and Titanic, was involved in the Panama Papers Scandal.
|
t3_4dres1
|
relationships
|
My sister (28f) wants me to move in with her even though I (23m) am currently renting with my best friend (23m)
|
Been renting with my best friend for two years now , living as roommates. It's a sweet set up , we play games, have junk food night, order pizza, talk about guy shit like if dinosaurs could take down a jumbo jet.
My sister recently moved back in to town from another state and has a shitload of money. She found this really nice house in a nicer part of town that she wants to rent . I told get it's great but isn't it big for one single woman? I suggested she also get a friend or someone to rent it out with. She said she asked a few people but they didn't want to so she might put out an ad on the internet.
She told be she'd really really love it if I moved in with her. I wasn't too sure, for starters it would be pricey. She told me she'd be willing to pay 2/3 of the rent herself so the amount I pay would only be marginally higher than what I currently pay for rent.
I pointed out my living situation with my buddy is pretty cool already and we play games. She told me she'd be happy to learn to play games to and watch my moves and even order junk food. She also told me she's gotten quite good at cooking and will prepare whatever meals I want.
I must say, it sounds like a hugely tempting offer and I think I might take it. It would mean my current buddy needs to find a new roommate but I don't think he'd take it too personally.
Any advice?
|
sister moved back in town, wants me to move in and rent with her, she's offering me a sweet deal. However it would mean I give up my current living situation which is pretty comfy.
|
t3_u6vrb
|
AskReddit
|
Do you consider fussy eaters rude?
|
We had some older relatives to stay recently, for quite a long time. One in particular, refused to eat anything he didn't normally eat. He didn't have allergies or dietary requirements, he just didn't want to eat outside his comfort zone. He claimed to like 'corned beef', so my girlfriend got a bit of silverside and corned it - he refused to eat that. When he said he liked 'corned beef' he really meant he liked tin spam...
Personally, I consider this quite rude. If someone has gone to the effort to make you something, I think you should at least try it. Obviously, if you're allergic, that's fair enough, but simply saying 'I don't want that' seems rude. I'd even go as far as saying dismissing something you don't like is rude (perhaps that's simply because I'm an adventurous eater).
|
Do you consider fussy eaters rude? Or are you a fussy eater yourself, who refuses to eat certain things?
|
t3_11ooeg
|
AskReddit
|
Why isn't therapy free?
|
Honestly. I am personally someone who can guarantee I'm depressed. I'm not all bitchy and emo no, but I hate lots of things for no reason, nothings interests me, and I just generally don't care aside from when I'm thinking of my failures. My not giving a fuck = not caring to work as a student = can't afford something that could benefit my life easily by doing nothing but talking (I've taken psyche in school and was considering this a career choice, no offense therapists of reddit, but $140 an hour to talk to someone just to feel better? The fuck?) Anyways just wanted to vent.
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If you have a computer don't be a spoiled ass and take a minute to read. Then feel blessed at your educational abilities! Hooray!
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t3_3bvgxt
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relationships
|
I [23F] broke up with my LDR BF [24M] of one year. The more I meet other people, the more I miss him, what should i do?
|
He was my first real relationship, eventhough we didn't get to see each other as much as we wanted to. In the beginning, everything was amazing. We got along so well that we could complete each other's sentence and we were so happy together, he was very devoted too. Then somewhere along the way and his obsession with fame and success in his career (entertainment industry), he started to care less and less about me. He didn't come see me as often and wouldn't let me go see him when i wanted to.
he stopped being romantic all together and there were so many nights that i cried because he neglected me. I knew it wasn't fair and i wanted to end it because i knew he didn't care about me or saw my values anymore, even though he was always polite with the way he talked to me and never said things that would upset me.
We met up one night, after him ignoring me all night, he finally told me this wasn't working. I agreed. We ended things on good terms. He went on with his life as normal, happy with work, surrounded by pretty girls and cameras. I wasn't fine. I was sad and i missed him so much. We talked a few times but it just made it worst because i knew he didn't care about me or wanted me back anymore. I started to get busy, i went out to meet people and did new activities, but the more i meet new guys, the more i realized that i really only want him. Even though he didn't treat me well but our personalities are so alike that it felt like home when i was with him. It's almost a month since we ended things and even though i'm angry and i hate him, but i still miss him more and more. The thought of him moving on with someone else just hurts me so bad. How do i feel better?
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Broke up with my BF who stopped caring me at the end of the relationship, but the more i go out to meet people the more i realize i only want to be with him.
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t3_4lmd23
|
relationships
|
I [29F] was recently told by my girlfriend [35F] that I cannot visit her family anymore because she cannot visit mine. But mine are extremely homophobic.
|
This past weekend, my girlfriend of nearly seven years said she no longer wants me to visit her family because she cannot visit mine. This is painful and shocking for me to understand because her family has always been open and loving towards our relationship and me. It is important to address that she has never met my parents because they are extremely homophobic and do not acknowledge our relationship; however, she has met my sisters and other extended family members. Because of my parents' perspective I never really had a strong relationship with them, or with family. I can take family in small increments but not all the time.
When I am with my girlfriend, I admit there are times when we spend a little too much time at her grandparents and I vocally express this to her because I want to spend time with her, without her family. She told me she understood, or so I thought.
Six months ago my girlfriend's father passed away unexpectedly. I could not be there for her as much as I would have liked because I was caught in the middle of my grad school program and working 50 hours a week. I think this caused her to form a deep resentment against me, which moved our relationship on the rocks. I notice we have been arguing more and picking up on nuances, like she doesn't say she loves me like she did before or texts/calls me as much while I am away. Then she tells me she doesn't want me around her family anymore, and I am just hurt and sad.
What's going on that I am not seeing? What should I do? I want to make our relationship work but she is not listening to me.
|
Girlfriend, who is very family-oriented, told me I cannot visit her family anymore because she cannot visit mine, who are homophobic. Her father died and now she only wants to be with family.
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t3_4cidmd
|
tifu
|
TIFU by telling my professor she is traffic.
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So I'm sitting in class playing on my phone so I don't have to talk to people. Same stuff, different day. About 5 minutes after class is supposed to start people start grumbling and asking each other questions because the professor has not arrived. This gets my attention and I start to wonder if we're going to leave early, praise jibbers. About that time a TA walks in and says our professor is going to be late because she is stuck in traffic. They then proceed to lead us in a class discussion to kill time. It is a small class (about 15), so we start discussing and the professor hustles in about 20 minutes later, clearly flustered. Now, being that it is a small class, we have relatively open communication with our professor. As such, she starts in on her whole "stuck in traffic experience," which of course lends itself to a plethora of 2 cent comments from everyone in the class. After this round table discussion on how awful traffic is has gone on for about 5 minutes, I decide it would be a good idea to infuse a little perspective into the moment that might also provide some levity. And so begins my moment of fuckupary.
Amidst a lull in the conversation, I don a great, big ole, shit-eating grin and chime in with, "Well you know, you aren't IN traffic, you ARE traffic." You could have heard a pin drop on a carpet floor from a different room.
Everyone starred at me with a look I thought was only reserved for when you spit on their grandmother's grave. And the look of loathing on my professor's face still haunts me.
Moral of the story, don't speak to people in real life from the perspectives you learn on reddit...
|
Told my teacher who was late to class that she IS traffic rather than she was in traffic. Received the stink eye.
|
t3_qkw83
|
relationship_advice
|
GF with cheating experience (not on me) is putting herself in a cheating situation again...
|
I'm a guy. We are both 25 years old, been dating for 18 months. My girlfriend's family is from Croatia, but we both live in the US.
The summer of 2004 after she graduated high school she went to Croatia for a month with her sisters. There she met a guy, and ended up cheating on her boyfriend who was back here in the US.
Summer 2006, same thing happened, now she is with a different guy, she goes to Croatia for a month, ends up cheating on this guy as well, with the same guy she met in 2004.
Summer 2009 she was single but she spent time with the same guy from the previous 2 visits.
I found out all of this from her older sister (I play indoor soccer with her sister so we hang out once a week at least) and her ex from 2006 (who just started working with me). She doesn't know that I know that she cheated. When her sister told me this I just sort of ignored it until I met her ex. When her ex (the guy working with me) found out I was dating her, he mentioned it. I didn't believe it, but then looked through her photos on facebook from 06 and 09 and of course there are a ton of photos of them two together.
I offered to go with her, she said I wouldn't like it over there. I asked why she'd go by herself, she said her parents/siblings couldn't afford going this year. I asked her to just got for a week or two, she refused, saying it's no worth spending plane ticket money and not going for 4-5 weeks.
The worst part of it all is that the guy she spends time with while she is there lives next door to her grandparents (where she stays while there). There is just no way that she will not run into him, spend time with him and possibly cheat. Should I just call it off now and just avoid the possibility of getting cheated on?
|
Girlfriend cheated on previous exes with the same guy, now she is possibly going to spend 4 weeks with him.
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t3_524pl7
|
relationships
|
My roommate [18F] caught me [19F] having sex with someone in our room. She totally freaked out even though she told me she was not going to be there.
|
Hi reddit I have a roommate problem.
I'm a college freshman so I've only been in school a couple weeks. My roommate seemed nice - I didn't think we were going to be best friends as I could tell we were very different people. But I thought she was pretty easygoing as she doesn't seem to care that I am way messier and louder than her.
She told me she was going away for the weekend to visit her family so wouldn't be here Friday night. So I invited this guy over who I have kind of been dating as I knew we would get some "alone time". Last night we were fooling around in bed when my rooommate walks in on us.
Obviously embarrassing for everyone but I didn't think it was a *major* issue as we're all adults and she had told me that she wasn't going to be there. Well my roommate was really fucking mad about it and started yelling at me. She called me a slut for bringing a guy back to our room that she had never been introduced to - said I disrespected her and her living space. My favorite part was when she said she didn't think I was a girl like that because I'm from the south (??). It went on and on like that basically for quite a long time.
So the guy I was with noped out of there (probably the end of that). I stayed and after her outburst tried to talk to her about it. I apologized but did say that I didn't think she would be there. She was like it doesn't matter, it still upset her that I would have sex with someone in that room. Then today she has totally blanked me, like I'm not there.
How to deal with this? I do feel kind of bad that she is really upset by it but also I don't think I did anything that unreasonable and what was she expecting going to college? Or maybe I was unreasonable? I don't know but I think it is unreasonable of her to expect me to get her approval on everything.
Thanks for the help
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My roommate walked in on me having sex with someone and she freaked out and is mad at me. Even though she told me she wasn't going to be there. Am I being unreasonable?
|
t3_uqn6p
|
AskReddit
|
Should a HighSchool combine a class with another School if They are in the Same Building? Important!
|
Ok so sorry if this is long but bare with me here. I am currently a sophmore in highschool and applied for AP biology but the problem is, my school is really small. So when i just found out(today) that not enough kids applied for ap bio, i started thinking! My highschool is a huge building and shares the building with another highschool, and was thinking why cant we just share an AP class because we didnt have enough kids in one school? I mean both schools share the library, gym, cafeteria, auditorium, and sharing the same sports teams as one huge baseball/ basketball teams! I mean, those sports are physically academic and they're sharing so why cant you put good students who are smart in the same class to share a mental academic. I mean I'm going to talk to the principal regardless, im just thinking if this is a nice idea or not?
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my school doesnt have enough people for a class, wondering if the other school in the same building can share classrooms for one class?
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t3_29shzg
|
relationships
|
My fiancé [m/29] and me [f/23] are due to get married in a year. I am incredibly in love with him, but I get the feeling that my feelings towards him are much stronger. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
|
We dated for 2 years, and have been engaged for a year. We get along great, I am completely comfortable with him, and he makes me incredibly happy. I was not really "worried" (don't know a better word to use) about anything until recently.
We started watching the TV show 'Orange is the New Black' where the main character is engaged but ends up having to go to jail for 18 months (or something around there). We were sitting on the couch kidding around about if we were in the situation what would happen. I told him if he ended up in jail I would most definitely wait for him, his response was the opposite. He said "if you did something stupid enough to get locked up I would go out and get laid, why would I wait ?" , That sucked to hear.
I thought maybe cause he thought we were kidding around and it was a scenario that will never happen he felt it was okay to say that. He found out right way it bugged me that he said that but he thinks its more funny than anything. So a few days later I gave him a scenario where I had to go visit my family for an extended period of time (year or two) and couldn't visit would he wait for me. And he gave me pretty much the same answer. "Why would you expect me to wait? A man has needs."
It makes me feel as though if I disappeared tomorrow it wouldn't be that big of a deal to him. Then I shake my head cause I do know he cares for me and loves me. I've told him my concerns before about this but he just tells me to not worry about it, but I can't help it.
I always thought that the man I marry wouldn't want to be with anyone else, would wait for me if he had to, I just don't know what to think of these comments.
|
Fiance made comments about how he wouldn't wait for me if i had to be away for a year and would move on to the next girl. Made me feel a bit worthless and unimportant in his eyes.
|
t3_2y7lw3
|
relationships
|
what does it mean when my ex (m22) friend requests me (18) on Facebook months later after a nasty break up?
|
Short story: I mety ex last summer via a mutual friend and we hit it off immediately, which is incredibly rare for me, as I am usually closed off. Before leaving for the fall semester at an internship several states away, we agreed to try dating with the agreement that no matter what happens, we would try again when I returned home. about a month later, my friend texted me and told me that she had matched with him on tinder. I kinda knew it before hand- he had stopped talking to me or texting me unless he was drunk, wanted to sex, or only replied when he initiated the conversation. Hurt, I broke up with him over text and told him that we should go our seperate ways with a request not to contact me agak. Even though we dated for such a short period of time, I found myself missing him and turned down dates from guys from football to pro hockey players that most women would kill to talk to. I reached out to him three times and after he never responded, I moved on and find myself now in a new relationship with a very wonderful lady. One day, out the blue, he friend requested me on Facebook. I'm not sure what do do or what this means. he was a good person in my life the short time I knew him but I don't know if it's worth having him in my life again. Is it really worth trying to talk things over?
|
months after a nasty break up, my exwants to reconnect I think and I'm clueless as to what to do
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t3_4e2ver
|
relationships
|
Machine Gun GF [22F]
|
I [27M] have a machine gun girlfriend - works in CSR type environment. Similar to what it sounds like she has a barrage of angry comments and very directed angry complaints of her life that she fires at me every day - without fail. I just sit there and "read" the texts/listen to her complaints and ignore half the crap in them and give her the "damn sucks" or "I think that's terrible" responses. It undermines any emotions I have towards those situations and towards her complaints. I hate to hear those complaints. I support but in honesty not exactly genuine support cause I don't care anymore. The complaints are very regular and very consistently the same so I don't ever see the point to enable her anymore. If however I don't read these texts and "feel" them she gets pissy. And I am very easy going and don't like that much. I even told her so many times but at the same time I know it's not going anywhere.
Furthermore, she has complaints about me and how my communications sucks and I feel attacked verbally a lot because there's so much blame from her about me. How I am always so timid and not assertive/don't show my dominance. She thinks it's not the love she deserves.
I don't know if this is how every girl acts. I'm very mentally tired and I know for a fact this isn't going away and I won't be changing.
|
Girlfriend shoots a ton of anger directed complaints about her life or about me towards me. I ignore and get blame for it among other communication related issues.
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t3_2ms2r2
|
relationships
|
Me [20 F] with my fwb [26 M] of about a month, I acted embarrassingly insecure/clingy/needy, is there any way to salvage this situation?
|
So there's this guy, let's call him Mike, that I started talking to back in July (It was on POF or something). We finally started hanging out and hooking up a few weeks ago. (We both kind of put off meeting, distance was an issue at one point, and I think there was a girl that he hadn't gone over yet).
So anyway we meet, we hook up, the sex is good, he thinks I'm a cool girl to hang out with, we both are looking for a fwb situation so it seemed pretty good. But then I fucked it all up on Monday.
I'm a pretty horny girl which means I want to hook up a lot. On Monday he was being kind of distant and instead of giving him space like a sane person I completely blew up his phone. Yes I realize that was completely crazy, I'm extremely ashamed at my behavior and then I started apologizing profusely. He ignored me all day Monday, yesterday he told me to "leave him alone" and I haven't heard from him since.
The texts came from a place of deep insecurity as a result of other guys from my past and I don't want to go into detail about that or what the texts said. But I looked desperate, pathetic, clingy, needy, and just overall like a mess.
There's a bunch of reasons why this situation is convenient for both of us, I'm pretty sure he doesn't have any other options at the moment for sex, and he loves the head and thinks the sex is decent too.
I guess my question is, is there anyway at all to come back from this? I'm not looking for a relationship from the guy but he was alright enough to chill with and the sex was really good, so just a fwb situation. I just want another chance to show that this won't happen again. What now?
I can provide more details if anyone needs.
|
blew up a guys phone, he told me to "leave him alone", is there any way to salvage this if I'm just looking for a fwb/cuddle buddy situation.
|
t3_2xmmcj
|
relationship_advice
|
Should I [17/m] forgive/forget and try again with my ex [18/f] or move on?
|
Of course I'm young so my issues may seem more insignificant but I'd still like advice on this. I originally dated this girl in 9th grade for a long time and ended, then we just started hooking up our senior year of high school, which lasted 2 months. We then ended somewhat recently and we've been kind of on/off since. The second time we got back together this year, we hung out all night although didn't tell me until hours later that she had sex with her ex like a week after we ended. We weren't exclusive when it happened but still... it hurt; after hearing that we stopped. Recently she actually has been hooking up with my teammate from school which has also been rough yet she has told me she loves me and doesn't want to hurt me. We hooked up once again last week and ended shortly after, but this time it seemed more permanent (lol probably doesn't seem that way to you guys/girls). Anyways... do you think I'm being immature by not getting over the sex with the ex-boyfriend so quickly after we first ended, or how she's treated me by hooking up with people i'm close to or at times when she probably realized it would hurt. She says she only cares about me but I really don't trust her that much anymore. To be honest, I've been really torn up about everything and she has really hurt me, especially since I had very strong feelings for her, that I still somewhat have. I've never been this hurt by a girl before and it's been difficult. Do you think I should forgive her and be with her or just try to move on. We both are going to college though in August far from each other and wouldn't stay together for that either, it's just a matter of the next few months. Pretty much all of my friends think i should end it and move on as i deserve better but who knows. What do you all think? Thanks
|
On/off with girl, she hooked up with ex and people that were close to me (when off). torn up and hurt by her. should i forgive her or not?
|
t3_1qk6fq
|
tifu
|
TIFU and got banned from riding my bus.
|
School ends at 2:08; Bus leaves at 2:15
It is currently 2:13, my friend and I need to get home and his bus (at the front) was already leaving so we hopped on my bus. In my district you NEED a pass if you are not on that bus regularly, but of course we didnt have one so I told bus driver that my friend was my German exchange student. On the fucking spot my friend says in a heavy accent "Gutentagen me Ovil *hesitates* Kook" My bus driver believes him than further calls the bus company to question protocol, they have to ask the school of Ovil so they call the school and they have no idea who he is, so 10 minutes pass, me and my friend are to deep to go back so we play along. MY FUCKING PRINCIPLE comes out, sees us, than just shakes his head in disbilef, laughs a little bit and pulls us from the bus.
>
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Lied to bus driver, banned from school bus, recently divorced Dad has to drive me to school and be late for work the rest of the trimester FML
|
t3_2zziew
|
relationship_advice
|
I [22F] am in love with someone I'm not supposed to be dating [26M]
|
I was out with a friend recently, who is becoming a priest, and he finally opened up to me. We've been friends with each other for a long time
now. I knew he liked me, and I'm sure he knew I liked him, but neither of us have ever brought up the subject, until now. I've been so anxious! I knew it was coming and now I'm really really scared that he won't stay with me, because I am in love with him. He is the perfect guy. I can't stop thinking about him and I absolutely have my heart set on him. I've never had the same feelings towards someone like this. The problem is that if he becomes a priest, he can't be in a relationship.
He said that he was torn between me and the priesthood. He said he had very deep feelings for me and that he wished he could do both. I asked him if he would consider leaving his career for me. He said he wants to continue with the priesthood but at the same time he said that he didn't want to hide his love for me any longer. I completely see his point of view - this has been his life long dream! He has invested years into it. How could he just give it up? But then what about me? We obviously both want to be with each other.
Right now we agreed to remain good friends, but I don't want to give up hope. He said he wants to try and find a way to make this work, but we're both unsure of what to do. Is there anyway that this can work? I don't know what to do or where to go from here. Please help!
|
I'm in love with someone becoming a priest. He isn't allowed to date and he is completely in love with me too but doesn't want to give up his life long dream. Neither of us are sure what to do.
|
t3_3ee2b3
|
relationships
|
My [21M] girlfriend [23F] constantly is suspicious of me cheating, and it's driving me away.
|
Me and my GF have been together for about 2 years now. We recently moved into an apartment together in May. Since then I have noticed that she thinks I'm cheating on her. When I ask her why she thinks this, she can't give any explanation why.
She gives me dirty looks whenever I leave the home without her, and there is just no sense of trust whatsoever.
I would absolutely never cheat on her. I pretty much go only to work and back to the apartment, and I have nothing to hide. I know she goes through my phone and PC, buti haven't brought it up yet.
I've tried talking with her before and she said she would stop, but today she says "I know you are hiding something from me and I want it to stop." This is after she has seemed sad all day and I was pressuring her to tell me what's wrong.
Is this cause for a breakup? Our lease doesn't end until December and I'm not sure what to do.
|
Girlfriend constantly thinks I'm cheating, I've talked about it to her, and she just did it again. Not sire how to proceed.
|
t3_3nrdbq
|
relationships
|
Me [22 M] with my 21 [F] dating a month, don't know what to get her for her birthday, suggestions?
|
So this girl and I have met on Tinder.
I got a DUI before we started dating but she's been great and has given me rides whenever I stay the night at her house. So I'm incredibly appreciative of her.
My birthday was late last month and she made it incredibly awesome. We went out to the bar and she brought a friend, while I invited all of mine. I haven't had so much fun on my birthday since I was like 16.
Her birthday is coming up next month and I have absolutely no idea what to get her. We share a passion for anime so I've been thinking about getting her a box set of an anime she likes, or buying her some clothes. I'm not exactly able to take her out since I don't have a car and would suggest us going on an uber but she drives, and is more than likely willing to drive to wherever I'd want to take her out to.
Any suggestions on what I could get her? I just want to show her that I appreciate her a ton.
|
GF bday is coming up. She made mine awesome and I want to return the favor. Don't know how with so little money and without a car.
|
t3_3hex31
|
relationship_advice
|
Should I (F/18) tell my ex boyfriend (M/20) that our old mutual pet passed away?
|
Bit of background: When we dated, we were both very into reptiles. We bought one bearded dragon together (Daisy) that I kept at my place. He bought one of his own (Gingersnap) that he kept at his. We both mutually owned the two of them. When we split up, I kept Daisy and he kept Ginger. He often asked about her, until I got a new boyfriend and he stopped contacting me (because his hopes of getting back together were ruined). We haven't spoken for three months or so.
About three days ago, Daisy passed away. :(
My question: Should I alert him to the loss of our pet? I feel like it's common courtesy to do so, but the two people I've asked have told me it might not be the best idea to contact him.
|
Ex boyfriend and I bought a bearded dragon together. When we broke up, I kept her. She recently died. Do I tell him?
|
t3_26u88j
|
personalfinance
|
Summer Internship Stipend - Is this taxable income?
|
Hi everyone! I apologize for the ignorance I'm about to spew out. I'm a 20-year-old college student with a minimal knowledge of personal finances. I have a savings account and a Roth IRA, but everything besides that I'm pretty much clueless.
Especially taxes. Since my first part-time job 5 years ago, my parents have very graciously filed my taxes for me. However, despite this convenience, it has left me with little knowledge of how taxes work.
This is very relevant to my life now, since I am starting a summer internship soon where I will be receiving at $3500 stipend for the whole summer. Because my internship is through a start-up online company, I will be receiving this payment through PayPal. I know this seems sketchy, but I have received and cashed out their PayPal payments before for other projects.
My question here is this - is this money taxable? A quick Google search couldn't confirm whether a "stipend" is taxable. I am 99% sure I won't be receiving a W-2, proof of employment, or any pay stubs from this company (my official capacity is "independent contractor"), so how would I report the income to IRS? Additionally, do I have to?
I apologize once again for my lack of knowledge on taxable income. Thanks so much for your help!
|
Receiving $3500 stipend for summer internship thru PayPal. Is this taxable income, or are stipends in any way exempt?
|
t3_1dvcp8
|
dating_advice
|
I M[24] Dont understand her [F22] Why ask me on a date when....(x-post from r/relationships)
|
So yeah I met this girl a week ago in a club.
We kissed and I left it at that.
Later I've added her on FB because I thought she was kinda cute and I saw we had a few things in common.
The next day after a little chat the day before she asks ME out and wants to buy ME a drink. I'm pretty flattered so I agree and we arrange a date.
Now the wierd part is: Since then she's almost not responding to what I say, she hardly initiates a talk but she does mention she's excited for the date.
I dont mind not speaking for a few hours at all, especially because I dont know her yet, but I do have SOME interest in her, and I kinda expect the same since she asked me out.
So bottom line: What is going on here really ladies? Is this normal behaviour? Do you ignore your date and give short answers when you speak to him?
|
Got asked out by a girl, said yes, now contact (especially from her) dropped to zero, but says she''s excited to go out with me. wtf?
|
t3_xh36j
|
relationship_advice
|
[23/m] Stupid in love with Filipina girl, and hoping not to screw this up. Advice?
|
I'm stupid, head over heels, in love with this girl. My family loves her. Her family (because they're back in country) doesn't know me so well, but they like me. She's only been here for a year and a half, so her cultural heritage is still really strong and I recognize that I'm an ignorant American man. Is there anything I should know about being in a relationship with a Filipina BEFORE I make that mistake and screw up? So far we've only hit one such pitfall which is that apparently any kind of PDA is a no-go in the Philippines.
|
I'm in love with a Filipina immigrant and I don't want to do anything to make her uncomfortable, so can you guys tell me things I should be doing and things I shouldn't?
|
t3_3sk1t1
|
relationships
|
My[24/F] boyfriend[20/M] pulls himself down and says terrible things about himself every time we disagree or fight.
|
My SO hasn't really been in a serious relationship before. I was his first for a lot of things, and that's OK. He's learning, and he's been a wonderful and attentive boyfriend for the duration that we've been in a relationship. He's mature, level headed and respectful - I see myself marrying him with no questions asked.
However, when we fight, he ends up really turning the attention to himself. For example, in the past I have been upset about something which has caused me to feel a bit anxious. I turn, he will get incredibly upset feeling like he failed me, and that he's let me down when he hasn't. It was maybe just an overreaction on my end. Even when I state that, he'll still be upset for awhile feeling like he should be better?
Today him and I were chatting via the internet and I asked him a question, he didn't answer, so I asked again. Turns out he was watching a video, and just didn't tell me, so I was talking to myself for a few minutes. No biggie, I wasn't upset. SO took this really hard feeling like he'd let me down. Something he said regarding the video didn't add up, so his response was "No, I'm not lying!" I agreed, but stated something he had said didn't click and his response was "I'm just a terrible person, is that what you want me to say?"
I admittedly, and pretty immaturely, hung up the call after saying 'I'm not dealing with this.' He knows that's not what I meant. I just wanted clarification. He sent me a few messages after apologizing and saying he deserves punishment, but that's not what I meant!
Again, this is his first real relationship and he's suffered from major self esteem issues. If this was someone else, I'd say they were being manipulative. My SO is perfect besides this ONE small issue. How can I address this/understand it?
|
SO says terrible things about himself when we fight ranging from 'he's stupid' to 'he doesn't deserve me'. He's a great SO, but sometimes this self abusive behavior is taxing.
|
t3_42qyl6
|
AskDocs
|
Recurring conjunctivitis
|
32 white F, 4'11" 105 lbs. I've woken up with conjunctivitis 5+ times since September. After the first time, I was given trimethoprim drops, which does resolve the problem after 1-2 days. So it does seem like it's bacterial and not viral.
I think it may be from my cat who sleeps on my pillow. Is that possible? I've started stuffing my pillow under the covers when I'm not around, but sometimes I forget. I've also been good about washing the pillow cases frequently (once a week). Most of the infections have been in my left eye, and I have a tendency to sleep on my left side.
|
pink eye 1-2 times a month since September. Poopy-paw-syndrome or something else?
|
t3_43kxeo
|
relationships
|
Me [23F] with my boyfriend [24M] of 1 year, he's got another date.
|
My boyfriend and I have an amazing relationship. That's not to say we don't argue, but we've never gone to bed angry, and we always talk things out properly. I can honestly say I've never loved anyone more - and he claims much the same.
For the last few months, due to work, we have been apart. Tentatively, we've opened up our relationship. I'm okay with that, and so is he. Somewhat, anyway. The rules are sex and only sex, no strings attached, no second-times.
Last week, he told me that there's a Valentine's Day party at work. It requires everyone to bring a date, and his work friends have decided they'll find a date for him (they do not know about me). He does want to go to the party, and I said that would be fine. He also tentatively suggested I, too, go on a date. I've justified the situation to myself. He won't know the girl, he won't sleep with her, he loves me.
I can't help but feel this is the beginning of the end, because we're long distance for a while. It started with open for only sex, and now we're going onwards to open dating.
|
Agreed to boyfriend going on a date. I've begun to have second thoughts. Am I being stupidly jealous? I really need someone to put some perspective on it.
|
t3_310oq4
|
tifu
|
TIFU by showing my boyfriend a karada harness. NSFW.
|
Today, I saw a post on Ask Reddit ( [reddit] ). A girl posted on there that she had been nude in a karada harness in front of her boyfriend and his friends. Not knowing what that was, I looked it up. With my boyfriend having admitted to me that he is into BDSM and me having an intense fear of it (personal reasons, don't judge), I showed it to him and said, "Just to clarify, this will NEVER be okay." He said he already figured that and would never ask. I then asked if it was something he would like. He said he would never press for it or seek it out but that it looked hot. For the first time ever, I didn't want him to touch me or come anywhere near me. I was terrified of him, almost to the point of tears. I didn't respond for a while, mainly because I didn't even know what to say. We then got in a fight about why it scared me, which ended with him saying, "You sent me a picture and I said it looked hot. That's the end of it in my brain. Sorry I answered with my honest opinion."
|
Showed boyfriend a karada harness. He said it was hot. I nearly had a panic attack. We got in a fight.
|
t3_kdzzp
|
AskReddit
|
Landlord wants to break lease early and asked us to move out. We're 5 months into a 12 month contract. Advice required!
|
(We live in the UK) Our landlord called out of the blue at the weekend and has said they want to sell their flat that we currently let and they wish us to start making preparations to move.
I met the landlord last night who said basically money troubles is the reason why. They want us to start looking for other places to live. In the meantime, they will be getting an estate agent to view the flat foe valuation. My housemate is out of the country for the next 2 weeks anyway, so I said we both need to have a discussion first. I pointed out that we weren't exactly in a position to move and that they were breaking the contract which she either didn't seem to realise was a big thing, or assumed we wouldn't make a fuss. I said we'd want to continue discussions via email (as we normally do) and we'd no doubt have some points an questions to clarify.
I've checked a few uk sites about leasing and tenancy, and it looks like we're in a good position legally. They can't legally evict us within the tenancy period of 12 months, Ab even then they have to serve 2 months notice at the end.
What I couldn't find was what possible outcomes there could be? We don't want to move unnecessarily but we're already planning for a worst case scenario. Could we demand compensation? Moving costs? Could we refuse to move until the tenancy period ends?
|
5 months into 12 months tenancy, landlord wants to sell the flat and break contract. Want to know what our rights are.
|
t3_j221m
|
AskReddit
|
Reddit, how do you deal with constant frustration? I am about to quit my phd and don't know what to do.
|
This is a throwaway account.
I am a phd student, about halfway through the program. I feel completely overwhelmed, frustrated and helpless. My project is not yielding any results, I am out of ideas what else I could try and frankly, I just don't care anymore. I would gladly take any other job if it just meant I didn't have to go back to the lab, but in my country and in my field you cannot find a job with a Master - entry level means phd.
There's a bunch of trouble with coworkers and my supervisor is so swamped with work he has no time to care about our projects or our problems.
I am scared about the future, I don't know what to do. Without the phd my whole education was for nothing. Thinking of the lab or my project makes me nauseous. The voice in my head is constantly telling me what a worthless, useless person I am. I have no energy left to do anything and even if I try and force myself, my inner voice just tells me everything I do is pathetic and useless. Sometimes I even start to think about how easy it would be to just end it by jumping off the roof or something. I would never do that, but it still scares me.
I really don't know what to do. I wanted to be a professor since I was a little kid, but now I just want to quit science and never go back. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
|
Constant frustration and lack of any support with phd project is making me feel worthless. I consider quitting and don't know what to do. Please help.
|
t3_3ghizt
|
relationship_advice
|
He's not mine [F;18], but the thought of losing him [M;20] broke my heart. Should I let go?
|
We met through the military, at our annual training. in the beginning he asked me to date him, and i offered to establish a open relationship with him. and so it happened, we had dates almost every day, texted each other without hesitation, and had the usual sex. however, casual sex turned into making love. each time we had sex i could feel us getting more and more closer and more intimate. i was falling for him, mind you, i was fresh out of a break up with my 2 year ex boyfriend. i wanted to be single for a bit but then feelings caught up to me. i made the mistake of confessing my feelings to him after a month of being in our open relationship, and he said he was dating other girls and not pursuing just me. now im stuck wondering what he wants when he displayed jealousy when i was on vacation with my ex, which we planned a year in advanced before the thought of breaking up. not to mention, i was still having sex with him while he was with other girls dating. i explained to him that i was ok with you dating other girls but when i went out with my ex that bothers you? he then confessed that he wanted to be more than friends with me. but now shit really gets confusing. he does not want to fully commit to what he wants because i will be moving to college 2 hours away and will not see him as much. i totally understand this but it hurts on my end because i want to put in the effort to see he and be with him and i doubt he does, even though he says himself that he will want to see me every weekend. rather than saying he does not want to be distanced, he says that I wil replace him. and i keep trying to convince him that i have my heart set already on him but it's exhausting trying to explain myself how much i want him. i asked him today if he's on the same page as me feelings-wise and he said "yeah for the most part." that had me thinking. i really like him, but do you think i should let go if he has a issue with distance?
|
i grew feelings for a fwb, he grew feeling for me, but distance is his main concern in a relationship and will not commit while I want to. are feelings not mutual anymore and should i fix it or leave?
|
t3_2nyr5t
|
relationships
|
My [23 F] boyfriend [22M] of 2 years wants to move in, but doesn't love me
|
So, I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 years now, as the title says. Our relationship is generally good, and we communicate well.
The only thing is that he doesn't love me. He has made it very clear that his definition of love is basically engagement, and that he does not love me based on that. I think he has also made it pretty clear that he does not believe he will love me, although he hasn't flat out said that. I don't tell him that I love him, since in the past any passing mention of marriage\engagement causes him to lecture me about how he isn't looking for a wife right now (even though I'm not looking for a husband right now and have told him that before). So I just go with his definition, and as I don't see myself getting engaged to him in the near future, don't tell him I love him.
But the problem is that I think I *do* love him. He makes me happy. I want to make him happy. We may not be together forever, but I'm willing to put the effort into our relationship to work to make that happen (barring any major life events obviously) if he wants. I choose him before anything else. I choose to re-frame my annoyances with him as something positive. I do little things just to make him smile because I love him, and I would do almost anything for him.
And this is what I don't understand. Why is he serious enough to want to move in with me, but he doesn't love me even after two years? What does that mean? Am I just not a good enough girlfriend to love? Does he only want to move in because it's convenient? Will he ever love me if he doesn't love me by now?
Sorry for the barrage of questions at the end. I'm just not sure what to think, and I don't know how to ask him why he doesn't love me without sounding like I'm trying to push him into saying something he doesn't mean :(
|
My boyfriend of 2 years thinks we should move in together even though he has made it clear that he does not love me, and probably won't. What does it mean? What should I do?
|
t3_g8dgp
|
relationship_advice
|
22, she has a son, need advice on where to go from here. Do I hang on to what I've got?
|
So my girlfriend and I have been together for 3 months, and have known each other for a few years. I really am falling hard for her, and the feeling is mutual. She has a 2 year old son with her ex, who is kind of a douche (I'm falling for the kid, too). Anyway, she and I had a little fight over the weekend. Nothing too substantial, it was essentially a breakdown of communication. We didn't talk for a couple days, and it made me want to talk to her and apologize. Today, she told me she wanted to talk about her "relationship needs". She was pretty stubborn still about the argument we had over the weekend, but was willing to put it behind us. She basically wanted to lay out what it is she needs from me: Someone to participate in raising her son, without being his father (His father leaves for Basic in May and will be stationed elsewhere for a few years). She gets very little help babysitting from family members, and her ex taking the kid was the only time we would have alone together. I really, really care for this girl (and her son, for that matter) and our sex life is phenomenal. I don't want to lose her, but I also am having a hard time coming to grips with the idea that I may be prematurely settling down in my early 20's. My social life is important to me, but I would be willing to take it down a few notches. Has anyone been in a similar situation? I just need some thoughts and advice. Thanks Reddit.
|
GF is a young mother who is (sort of) sacrificing her youth to raise her son. Do I join her?
|
t3_4osu41
|
relationships
|
Me [20] with my girlfriend [20F] 1 month, asked if I would do a threesome
|
First off let me start by apologizing if this isn't the best writing, I understand how hard it can be to help someone who doesn't present his or her issue in a very easily read way. However I just woke up and I'm a bit worried. This is also only my third post on Reddit.
So me and this girl have been dating. We both have never dated anyone before and even though it's only been a month we really love each other. We are very alike in a lot of ways (and very different in just as many), and get a long great. We feel like we've known each other for years, despite the fact that it has literally been a month.
Two days ago she asked me "would you ever do a threesome," to which I replied "no fucking way. I mean I would only do that if it were with another girl, not a guy.... Did you mean with a girl or a guy?" She told me it would be weird for her to do that with another girl because she is straight.
I said something along the lines of "there you go then. I'm actually a little disturbed that you would ask that."
HER: "Why?"
ME: "Because you're my girlfriend, I'm not sharing you like that."
I forgot about it a while later, but now I woke up with it in my head. I tend to overthink things a lot and have considered she was just curious if I would do that sort of thing. However, at the same time I feel as though she wants to do that or maybe even has someone in mind. It made me feel like I'm not good enough for her and I know for a fact that I'm better than enough (as a person), that I'm really great.
So what do I do? Talk to her about it and risk looking insecure or let it go? No body knows this but I can get jealous at times, and if she had someone in mind I would be very jealous.
|
Girlfriend of one month asked if I'd ever do a MMF threesome but says she would never do a MFF threesome. Let it go or be worried?
|
t3_4qq2uu
|
relationships
|
I (F/30) have been labeled a lesbian but I'm not, how should I handle this?
|
I was walking down the hall at my gym and licked my lips out of bad habit. I was scanning the room looking for my trainer who I'm crushing on when a group of girls fell on my line of sight. One of them yelled to her friend that I was checking her out and licking my lips.
I stood there shocked. The girl and I sort of eyed each other up and down like who the heck is this? I walked away embarrassed but had to walk back to get to my locker. The girl that made a scene gasped when she saw me and a male voice asked if I was a dyke. I'm pretty sure now that it was my male trainer.
|
How should I handle things now? I've never been in this position before. The entire gym probably thinks I'm a lesbian, but I like men. I've always liked and dated men.
|
t3_4rhdom
|
relationships
|
M/22 Broke up with Gf F/23. Directionless with guilt.
|
So I broke up with my gf. We went out 2 months but we hung out for 2 years so we got to know one another. At first we both didn't know what we want then we decided to try going out. It was fun at first but soon I noticed that I was feeling irritated all the time, I was being more sarcastic and even mean with her at times. Not in any harmful manner but more like attitude wise. And I didn't know what was going on. At that time too I just moved out my house, graduated and found myself stuck on what I wanted to do next with an onset depression effecting my mood drastically. So I start to notice my behavior and thoughts... and the next day I go to my gf house and tell her how I feel directionless and don't know how I feel about all this anymore and how I'm not happy here. She suggested if I feel that way we should end it. There was a silent agreement... she didn't do anything wrong, she did everything right, I kept reassuring her. And without looking at me she said she'll need some time... that was a week ago..
Now I feel a bit free but at the same time, knowing the cost of a relation with someone I grew attached too... and I don't feel happy at all knowing my choice ended up hurting her. I'm not happy knowing I hurt someone who liked me so much they'd put up with me. I'm not happy knowing I'm still directionless.
I haven't been able to be alone for almost a few months. Work has me 5 days a week. School is coming up and living with housemates makes things hard for privacy or solitude.
|
I didn't want to be with someone, knowing I wasn't in a healthy state of mind with myself. And I especially didn't feel right knowing she was taking my s### and just taking it.
|
t3_e860h
|
AskReddit
|
My Mom is quite the parasite. Thoughts?
|
For the record, I love my momma to pieces, absolute PIECES, and I'd to anything for her. The problem is, she really does ask me to do a lot. She leans very heavily on me (her oldest), and the people around her. She seems completely unwilling to admit or discuss her shortcomings, blaming it all "on the kids".
The few times I've gotten up the nerve to calmly bring this up (I was generally raised with "because I'm the mom"), she'd avert the subject or turn it on me, and it always ends with us both in tears.
This morning I got yet another phone call (she calls almost every day) for assistance. She needs me to download something for her work since her computer is down. This usually sucks up at least 2 hours of my time, time I had thoughtfully reserved to get my OWN work done. I feel like she needs to be more responsible, and handle this stuff before the day of a deadline. So, after 20 calm minutes on the phone, I (more roughly than my usual) said I really needed to get on with this and start my own day. She shot back with a guilt trip (as usual)...
Wtf Reddit. I have no idea how to handle this woman. I moved out to get some space, and she doesn't respect it. She doesn't live by the responsible standards she taught me, and I'm at my wit's end. 20 years of saying "yes mom" and just bending to her will is tiring. It was fine when I was younger - I'm all about helping the family - but I really feel like she needs to learn to stand on her own, or face the fact that she's unable.
Thoughts?
|
My mom leans VERY heavily on me, long after I've moved out to get some "space". How do I confront her about this, or make her realize its impact on me and the people around her?
|
t3_gkbn4
|
AskReddit
|
Hey reddit, so I just moved countries.
|
Okay so hopefully it works this time -_-
I moved from New Zealand to Australia just recently (I know both countries are pretty close to each other but still it was something big for me). The move has been great, Im still having problems finding a job to support myself until my cash suply runs out.
But what I wanted to ask was, Ive been feeling a bit lonely lately, and finding it really hard to make friends since Ive gotten here, the only person I actually know his my cousin who is twice my age and most of his friends are older than me and have other personal interests or just too busy to really make "proper" friends. Inbetween jobhunting and a lot more jobhunting, Im unable to search for any groups or commitments where I can start networking with people and buliding up a friends group of my age, so I was wanting to know what you guys thought would be the best way to make friends in a new country.
|
Moved to a new country, know no one, busy trying to set my life up, how to make friends?
|
t3_10po1a
|
relationships
|
Later today I'm having "the talk" with my boyfriend (24M) of a year and I (22F) don't want to break up, but I think he does.
|
We've been together a year and we've been serious before we ever started dating. We're the kind of people who can't wait to grow old together and be grandparents. A few months ago we started having problems. He's become distant, less affectionate, more irritable. He's asked me to stick it out before because he knows hasn't been a good boyfriend lately. We argue, but we don't yell or swear. We've talked a few times, but problems always resurface.
What happened: After moving out of his mom's he's crashing on a friends couch so he doesn't have a room to himself anymore (where I slept over almost every night). He was trying to save up money for school, but couldn't do it. He had stopped smoking weed because the program drug tests, but a combination of friends and being a boy made him slip and he's smoking again which is also part of why he isn't in school. Combine that with my living situation where I'm still in my mom's place (but for 2 more weeks) and we sneak around the house to have privacy. I feel like it's because we have horrible living situations and we both are struggling with figuring out our lives career-wise that we're unhappy. Potentially, he could get his shit together in the spring and enroll in school and I will be moving out into a mom-free apartment.
A few days ago we were on the phone and he said he doesn't know if he's still in love with me and doesn't know if we should stay together. We're talking later today and I think he will want to break up. I don't want to. I know he isn't good to me right now so I think we need a break, but I don't want to break up entirely because I still want to grow old with him and our problems are situational.
How do I get him to see that I'm the best thing for him? How do I make him stay? What should I say?
|
I think he wants to break up. I don't. I feel like it's just a rough patch, a phase. What do I do?
|
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