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t3_2w0hn6
|
relationships
|
My (16f) (ex)bf (16m) hit me...I feel like its my fault
|
I don't know what to do. I went over to my boyfriend's house to see him before I had to babysit and we got in a bit of an argument. He was freaking out and I told him I was going to find a ride home and we could talk about whatever we were arguing about later when he was calm because I didn't want to have to argue and then babysit right after. I texted my friend Angel (M) and I feel like this is where I made the biggest mistake.
My boyfriend asked if Angel was a guy and I said yes, then he slapped me across the face. His mom heard me crying and telling him I thought he wouldn't hit me again and took me home after my failed attempts to get my phone back from him to call another friend to get me.
I feel embarrassed that his mom knows and now my friends because they called while I was crying. I never wanted to make him seem like a bad person and I feel as though it's my fault for texting a male friend to get me. maybe I should've stayed and talked about it instead of trying to leave.
|
bf hit me after I texted a male friend to pick me up after an argument.
|
t3_2exr1s
|
tifu
|
TIFU by seeing Book of Mormon
|
So last weekend I saw Book of Mormon. And all week I've had the songs stuck in my head non stop. They're all so damn catchy.
In an ironic twist of TIFU fate, For the last few hours I've been making obnoxious "hasa diga eebowai" comments in various TIFU posts. For example "When you give your sister herpes, hasa diga eebowai", ... but substituting giving your sister herpes for whatever the TIFU was...you get the idea. Then I'd sing my comment in my head since the song is stuck there (if you listen to it you'll understand how catchy it is). Well, doing this gave me the urge to actually listen to it, so I found it on Youtube. I had headphones in, and started humming it to myself. Well I was getting pretty into it... and when I got to the "I have maggots in my scrotum" line... without thinking I dramatically sung out loud "I HAVE MAGGOTS IN MY SCROOOTttUUUMMMMM"
Well, of course, my boss was walking behind my cubicle just as this happened. He heard me. Stopped dead in his tracks. Stared me down for a good 10 seconds. And then said "what the fuck is your problem?". I tried to explain it was from a song...don't think he believed me.
|
Saw Book of Mormon ... told boss I have maggots in my scrotum. Hasa diga eebowai :/
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t3_46847o
|
relationships
|
Me [23/F] with [24 M] dating for about a week intensely and exclusively, now it seems he's suddenly backing off???
|
I rarely post but here goes:
Long story short I've been in a very low place in my life and decided along with therapy and medication to make some positive changes in my life, especially expanding my social horizons.
I downloaded Tinder because, despite the reputation, I've actually met some pretty decent (and platonic) people on there. Last Monday I met this guy who was SUPER in to me. We had so many similar interests, etc. etc. and it turns out he lives 10 mins away.
So we meet, have a great time, and click like no other. Everything he's into, I'm into and it's awesome. Asks me to be his Valentine, introduces me to his friends, takes me out, I talked to his mom over the phone so I could "meet" her too, etc. He's talking about the future already, but NOT in a creepy/super attached way, just thinking out loud and mentioning that future involving me if things continue to go well.
We literally spent five days straight together (with the exception of work) and decided to take some time to ourselves this week.
I've noticed far less communication/cutesy texts since Monday, which would have been our first day apart, and my self doubt is getting the best of me telling me he's lost interest and I'm a bore and all I can offer has been exhausted in five fucking days...
I can feel I'm about to become a mess and I just can't understand it if that is the case. I KNOW I'm jumping to conclusions but something tells me I'm right. And I KNOW it's only been literally two days that we've been apart but I'm known to overanalyze.
PLEASE-any of your advice is welcome. Good, bad, overly harsh, whatever. I am just feeling so ridiculous and naive and unsure right now and he is the best guy I've ever met.
****We are both dating exclusively at this point as we discussed from day one.
|
Meet incredible, respectful guy, spend tons of time with him and have a blast, then it seems like he's backing off.
|
t3_548jts
|
Advice
|
My aunt is in a bad marriage and doesn't know what to do.
|
My aunt just moved to the US from South America and married a US citizen (also latino). They have been married since March of this year. Her now-husband had promised her the moon and the stars back when they were dating while she was still living in South America. Now that they are married, it turns out her husband is nowhere near as good a person as he led her to believe. I've met the husband a couple times and he is actually very manipulative (ie: hid her US immigration documents for a couple weeks, doesn't let her see her sister who is lives nearby, and overall basically hamstrings her from becoming self-sufficient here in America), verbally abusive, and drives drunk with her in the car. She was led to believe that if she got married to him, she would be able to have a better life here in the US. Whenever they get into an argument, he threatens to divorce her so that she doesn't get her documents and will be forced to move back to South America. I am afraid for her life since her husband tends to get drunk and get behind the wheel very often, she has confronted him about that, but he has not changed his ways. I don't know what she can do to get out of the situation and stay in the US. She recently received her work permit, which will expire in a year and residency documents are still being processed. She is currently taking English lessons so she is able to converse in English, but with some difficulty. I'm pretty sure she would be much more fluent in English now if it weren't for the fact that her husband is basically preventing her from going out and immersing herself and learning the language. I've given her advice to actually keep a log of all the threats and abuse she's received from the husband and she is currently doing that. Do you have any advice I can pass along to her? I think she should go back to South America, but I think she at least deserves an opportunity at a better life here.
|
Aunt married an asshole that threatens to divorce her "to keep her in line" or else she will have to go back to South America and she feels she doesn't have many options.
|
t3_3xsb8z
|
relationships
|
Me [23 M] with my Ex/Bestfriend[22/F] 8 Months, Broke up but kinda don't know whats happening
|
So, me and my girlfriend/bestfriend talked for like a year before we started dating and it started in October and ended at the end of November and its a long distance relationship and we officially met in October and made it official, so things were great and then one day like a switch just flipped and she despised everything I did, and everything I did just irritated her or at least she seemed like.
Side note, shes dealt/deals with depression on and off and she had told me that the holidays kind of always set it off.
So December comes around and she breaks up with me, and she said she doesn't wanna end the friendship and she doesn't want to be sad with someone and wants to be sad alone, so we continued talking for a bit, and honestly I felt so neglected and it being a long distance relationship texting and all that stuff was really all we had, so that drastically stopped, and she just seemed uninterested but still kept saying that she really wanted this to work and sometimes let me know that. I may of ended it on and off a couple times (the friendship part) because I was struggling with it, because I felt like she just didn't like me anymore, or didn't wanna talk to me or any amount of things. So this week I decided to officially stop talking to her and today she messaged me hearing I had an accomplishment (promotion) so we ended up talking today again and we came to the conclusion that it was a miscommunication on both parts.
Now I'm wondering if shes just depressed and will ever be open to the idea of dating me again or if that could of just been an excuse? Because she initiated dating and said she was happy as ever when we first started dating and even before that, so I'm wondering if the depression could of really made that big of a difference.
|
Talked for a year, dated for a month, got depressed for the holidays and we broke up, continued friendship and I'm wondering if theres a chance we'll get back together? (Long distance)
|
t3_54cevm
|
relationship_advice
|
My boyfriend of a year [18/M] and I [19/F] love each other, but issues are rampant
|
I know we're both young, but this isn't a teen-rant type of thing; we're both quite mature and serious about our relationship. So, my boyfriend and I have never been able to fully connect emotionally, even after almost 2 years together. I'm the type to listen and understand feelings to no limits, but at the cost of being emotionally expressive myself. I cry when I'm sad, I talk about embarrassment, I get antsy when I'm anxious, and so on. However, my boyfriend can't understand or deal with my emotions at all, even the mild ones like embarrassment ("toughen up", he'll say). His inability to understand kills me, it makes me sad, and when I'm sad it all gets worse; he'll call me emotional and complicated and unreasonable, which makes me feel even WORSE (I've upset him by being upset now). Then, as I'm feeling bad and totally misunderstood, I end up comforting him so he can have a good day... **[EDIT]** to prevent bias, from his standpoint, I'm too sensitive.
This has been going on for basically our entire relationship. Just today, I was a little upset because he said he'd do something for me several times and never came through. All it took was a sigh and a little slump of my shoulder, and he was instantly triggered ("Tell me what is wrong, right now." "I'm sorry, but I want a good morning and I really don't want to..." "Tell me, or I'm not taking you to breakfast.") He doesnt understand why I feel the way I do, ever, with any negative emotion.
On the contrary... despite the emotional issues, we have a superb relationship. We can talk for hours about politics and technology and cars, and we're very kind with one another (emotions aside). We share very similar views, beliefs and interests. I want to say he's the one - but I can't live my entire life feeling like my negative feelings are literally satan. What can I do?
|
boyfriend and I are highly compatible, but extremely incompatible emotionally, and it's driving us both insane.
|
t3_2vtxus
|
tifu
|
TIFU by talking to my dad
|
I have been trying to find an internship with a law office for over a year now; competition in my area is very fierce and openings are very few. Feeling and looking a bit bummed after my latest lawyerly rejection, my dad inquired as to what the matter was; I told him and did not think on it for the rest of the day until my mother entered my room with a haunted look. Apparently, my dad decided to Google law offices in my town and called them on my behalf to tell them why they should hire me. I appreciate the intention but I am incredulous right now.
|
Darn it, dad.
|
t3_533q62
|
relationships
|
I [13M] don't have any real friends and I lack physical affection
|
**Sorry if you see any gramatical errors, a 13 year old sad and sleepy boy whose native language isn't English is trying to communicate with you.**
Pretty much the title.
I mean, I go to school and I get good grades. I have a ton of friends (and I'm meeting new people everyday and they start conversations with me because I am a 6ft 13 year old where the average height is like 5ft 8). And that's nice, but I don't have REAL friends that understand me or that I can get things off my chest and tell them things I don't tell anyone else. I mean, we usually shake hands and shit or talk about usual stuff but nothing special.
I also lack physical affection, sometimes I just want someone whom I can open up to, someone that will hug me and tell me that things will get better when I'm sad, or congratulate me and give me a kiss when I achieve something. Someone that would love me.
I did have two people who (at the time) I loved more than anything. They helped me get through some really tough times, bullying, financial problems etc. But I fucked up.. real bad. And I regret it.
Anyways, as I said, I don't have real friends whom I could open up to, nor do I have a girlfriend that could give me a kiss on the cheek and cheer me up when I'm sad. **What's there to do?**
I suppose lots of people will say that I'm too young for a girlfriend or that friends from middle school will dissapear once you go to high school or college, but honestly, I just need someone right now, I feel isolated. Like I didn't have any human contact in years..
|
I lack physical contact and a real friend, I need someone but I'm classified as 'too young for a girlfriend' and I don't feel comfortable opening up to one of my friends because I feel they're just going to tell everyone my secrets. Anything to do?
|
t3_vwr62
|
AskReddit
|
Got hit on a parking lot, when the other driver was backing out. Old car, not big damage. Worth filing insurance claim?
|
I have been hit on the parking lot by a driver who was backing out. I took photos, and insurance information of other driver, but didn't call police. I also do not have any witnesses. Only photos.
I wanted to give the other driver a chance to pay me $300 and I wouldn't file claim, just let him go. He refused, and now he would not even pick up a phone or reply in any other way.
Body shop estimated repairs at $1500. I understand that insurance is also on the hook for resale value and rental, which could easily add another thousand.
My question here is: in a long run, is it worth claiming with insurance? My car is a 2000 Corolla, and I really don't care that much about the dent, it would be nice to fix it, but oh well, it's an old car. I understand there will be an accident record, and probably increased premiums due to that record. I am worried that I would end up paying more in a long run than get in compensation. Are there other repercussions?
|
Got hit by backing up driver. Debating if it is worth filing insurance claim, or just suck it up and let go.
|
t3_301v80
|
askwomenadvice
|
How do I assure my pregnant wife that she's still sexually appealing?
|
I'm 32 and my wife is 27. This is her first pregnancy. She is about 16 weeks pregnant right now and showing. She's not huge, but there's no hiding that she's pregnant anymore.
She also has stretch marks, which don't bother me at all, but about which she is very self-conscious.
Our sex life slowed a little lately, but that was because the first trimester was **very** difficult for her, and not because of a lack of interest on my part. It's gotten mostly back to our usual activity within the past week.
She tells me that she doesn't think I could possibly find her sexy anymore, but I **really** do.
She asked me what I could possibly find sexy about her body, and I told her specifically what I find sexy about her. But basically, she thinks I'm just saying nice things to make her feel better. But I really do find her sexy, and she just doesn't believe me.
How can I show her that I'm telling the truth?
|
I think my wife is sexy, but at this stage of her pregnancy, she doesn't feel it. How can I assure her that I really do find her sexy?
|
t3_347bxn
|
relationships
|
I [17 M] don't consider my friend [17 M] too close to me anymore and with college coming up, am feeling pressure choosing roommates.
|
Me and my friend (let's call him Joseph) are both from the same high school, going to the same college. We've known each other for 8 years and are decently close, but I'd rather room with some friends that I am very close to (let's call them Robert and Richard) but have known for only 6 and 4 years respectively.
I feel like shit for leaving Joseph on his own, even though we all go to the same high school and are part of the same group. It's perfectly possible for all four of us to room together - however, Robert and Richard feel the same way as I do about Joseph- we're just not very close to him at all. I feel this sort of obligation towards Joseph, having known him for so long and being on good terms with him. We've both struggled with loneliness and finding it hard to make friends, which makes me feel like a special kind of dick for leaving him behind when he considers me one of his closest friends, and I sincerely worry for him. What can I do to maintain a friendship with everybody involved? And I get sometimes that friendships just end, and if that's true, how do I go about breaking the news to him?
|
Going to college, I have two very good friends, one not-so-close friend that I feel an obligation towards, and the two good friends don't want to room with the not-so-close friend.
|
t3_4u75m4
|
tifu
|
TIFU by being tired and squelching on a couch
|
Worked 9 hours today after staying up late. Hour before I get off, a couple that know my family text and ask me to babysit that evening, short notice, previous sitter canceled, etc. I was like whatever gotta make that bank, I'll take it. Show up. No problems with the little shits. Theyre asleep, now just waiting for the parents to get home.
Check out the bathroom, and lo and behold, they got those fancy ass, japanezy looking smart toilets with the butt squirter thing. I do my business then start playing with it. Damn I gotta get one. I'm pressing all sorts of buttons.
However, I didn't press the dryer button soon enough. Parents get home, I come out and sit down to put on my shoes.
Squelch.
No idea of the damage inside or out... Booked it out with the lights dim and didn't risk a backside glance
|
^title said it
|
t3_t7686
|
AskReddit
|
My mom has been suffering from a rare disorder called Mal De Debarquement Syndrome for several months now.. Can Reddit help?
|
My mom and dad went on a cruise a few months ago, and when my mom got off the ship she reported feeling as though, while walking on steady, solid ground, she was still on board the ship. She describes the sensation as though she is wearing styrofoam shoes while trying to walk across water. It has severely impacted her ability to function; she quit her job as a nursery school teacher, and she is trying to go on disability.
For some, it disappears after a few months, and for some, a few years. She belongs to an online support group for people with MdDS, and she is constantly doing research about it. As of yet, there are no known treatments that are proven to be effective, and still no known cure. She is due to be admitted (hopefully) to a Johns Hopkins study, which would be a great step if it happens, but she is still not guaranteed results.
In the meantime, however, we haven't been able to find anything to alleviate her symptoms. She experiences the "rocking" every waking second of every single day.
All I want is for my mom to feel better. She has told me that she has been becoming increasingly frustrated, that she is feeling more and more that the situation is hopeless, and that she is trying her hardest to avoid slipping into depression.
I'm not sure what literature or suggestions exist out there that we haven't already looked into, but I will admit that neither of us are expert researchers. I've seen the reddit community perform some miracles, however, and so I turn to you now in hopes that you will be able to find something that we haven't. If anybody has experience with MdDS, or ideas or suggestions that could help, we would greatly appreciate it. You guys are awesome.
Here's the website my mom recommends as a starting point: [MdDs Balance Disorder Foundation](
|
My mom has MdDS and it doesn't seem to be going away on its own. Can reddit help?
|
t3_2gp2zj
|
relationships
|
It's been a year and I [18M] am still in love with a girl. I could use some advices.
|
It's been a year now that I abruptly ended a relationship with my friend [18F], who I have been talking to for three years. I felt really close to her, she did too, but didn't see me as her boyfriend. I wanted to be that person to her, she knew it, but we both kept things still.
I tried clearing things up a few times, stopped talking to her for a few weeks but eventually came back to her. She did the same, we needed each other.
Last year, I figured this relationship was too "toxic". It distracted me, gave me false hopes, and didn't lead to anything. It was the right decision, for me, to stop talking to her. She always felt like she didn't care about anything. If I stopped talking to her, then fine, she would move on.
However, we went to the same school during last year (until a couple of months ago). I kept seeing her around, and it kinda made me suffer. I couldn't be part of her life anymore.
The reason I'm asking for your help, is because I always resisted the need of coming back to her until now. I feel like I need someone close to me. I have nobody.
I'm sure she's very upset with me but the look in her eyes makes me think I still have a chance. Maybe that's just me over thinking. Maybe I'm trying to convince myself. The truth is, I never had someone so close to me my whole life and I'd like to get her back.
|
Went away from a very important girl a year ago, I'd love to talk to her again. Not sure how.
|
t3_1nnh1i
|
relationships
|
Me [18 M] with my [19F]... complicated.
|
Using a throwaway cause she uses reddit I think.
I knew this girl for 4-5 years, and we always got on. Early in our friendship we developed feelings and this eventually lead to 'love' (was it love or not you ask... I'm too young to tell).
However, we never entered a relationship because she was tied up with another guy and didn't want to end it. Naively, I just accepted this.
Her and this guy ended, and we got on fine once more, still meeting up but the furthest we ever went together sexually, was a mere kiss. Nothing more, nothing less. I had sex on the outside with other girls, just because if she can be with that guy, then I can be with girls surely. Right? You might be wondering why we never progressed further into a relationship - she 1) didn't want a boyfriend (which was true, her and this other guy were also never in a relationship strangely 2) didn't want to hurt either me or this other guy.
Then late last year, October perhaps, she dropped a bombshell that she now has a boyfriend...some random dude.. That hurt me more than it ever did with that other guy, and so I said fuck this, I'm done, and that was that.
Side note, since then I tried it on with her friend (not deliberately, I didn't target her because she was her friend, it just happened) but that ended over summer.
I've bumped into her a few times since then, and she's single once more. I've always wondered, 'what if?' and how things would've been if we did get into a relationship. Is it worth pursuing again? At least to be her friend and take it from there? Anyone got any thoughts on this, it's all I'm wondering tbh.
|
Mutual love with a girl, never entered a relationship due to lack of commitment. Willing to try it with her again...thoughts?
|
t3_xmdhz
|
AskReddit
|
My buddy is a cheap ass. Reddit, what should I get him for his wedding?
|
So I'm a groomsmen in my buddy's wedding. We were really good friends in high school, but haven't seen each other much in the past 6 years.
Each groomsman had to pay for their own dress clothes (expected, so not a problem).
The ceremony and reception are both on his parents' property, so there's no cost there.
The meal is all cooked by family, so there's no catering costs either.
There is no bar at the wedding. Its a BYOB affair (with 170 people invited, so I can see this all being a big mess).
We had the rehearsal last night, and the gifts he gave to the groomsmen were: a small bag of homemade party mix, two suckers, a travel bottle of hand sanitizer, and a water bottle that I figure came from the dollar store.
The guy has a really good job he's been at for 5 years, owns 3 vehicles, and is building a house. They're also going to California for 3 weeks for their honeymoon (we live in Atlantic Canada).
The whole process for this wedding has been a disorganized mess, and the gift last night felt like a slap in the face. I personally would rather get nothing at all from them instead of a $6 grab-bag of stuff that had absolutely zero thought put into it.
I know it's their big day, but I feel that they completely overlooked the people who are helping them set things up, and will be up there behind them for support when they actually tie the knot.
Given all of this, what should I get this couple for their wedding? Should I be the bigger man and get him something nice? Do I get him something equally thoughtless? Do I get him nothing at all?
|
My friend gave me a bag of snacks for being a groomsman in his wedding. What should I get him?
|
t3_1fdf0w
|
dating_advice
|
Signs a female coworker likes me
|
Hello, I need some advice on whether a female coworker likes me. First, I am male 29 years old and she is 40 years old. We have been working together for several years but recently I have felt she has been flirting with me. She has always been concerned with my well being and gave me a gift when I graduated from grad school over a year ago. In addition, the both us of seem to have developed a teasing relationship with each other. We both poke fun at each others faults and eccentricity. This is all in good fun. She is very nice to me and even waited for me once when I left the office a different way.
Now, I always considered her a friend and never thought of a romantic relationship but recently I did have a sex dream about her. Ever since I have been wondering if we might have a connection. I want to ask her out I am afraid about ruining the friendship. I am not concerned about her age because I love the fact she is mature, intelligent, and looks great. I find girls my own age immature and all they want to do is get drunk and party.
I got some advice that she does like me but not in a romantic way.
I am wondering what should I do? Thanks in advance
|
Signs a Female coworker may like me
|
t3_33ohf4
|
offmychest
|
To this day, I feel like an idiot for lies my parents told me.
|
Background: When I was younger, I was curious about how glasses worked (my dad wears them). So I had this mind-altering conversation with my dad.
Me: Why do you have to wear those glasses all time?
Dad: Well, if I took them off, I wouldn't be able to see anything.
Me: Would you be able to tell who me and David [fake little bro name] are?
Dad: Nah, when I take off my glasses, people just look like M&M's.
Me: Really?! What color M&M am I??
I believed this for an embarrassingly long time and I can't believe how gullible I was, and still am.
|
Thought people that needed glasses saw people as M&M's when they don't wear their glasses.
|
t3_2ndtx7
|
relationships
|
Is it possible for me [25, F] (a clean freak) to live in harmony with my partner [24, M] (a total slob)?
|
My boyfriend and I moved in together 3 months ago. We have been dating for 2 years. I knew he was messy before we moved in together, but it was never an issue until his messes were in my personal living space. They make me anxious and stressed. Examples of his messes include: dirty dishes in sink overnight that aren't even rinsed (food is caked on in the morning), dirty clothes all over house especially bathroom, food crumbs all over house, bed is never made, wet towels left all over, bathroom is basically a disaster whenever he uses it, laundry basket always overflowing (even throws clean clothes in basket because he doesn't want to put them away). I cook dinner every night. Additionally, he does not do dishes unless I nag for hours. He has not vacuumed once since we moved in. He has done laundry once, and that one time he didn't bother to take the clothes out of the dryer they were in there for days. He gets cranky if I ask him to take the garbage out or put his stuff away. I blame his mother, who did everything for him up until the point when we moved in. I'm feeling so defeated. We are fighting constantly because I feel like I am cleaning up after him non-stop. Is there any way we can live together without me losing my mind? He's my best friend and when we are getting along, I'm so happy.
|
I want to live in harmony with my partner, but he's a total slob and it drives me nuts.
|
t3_325028
|
personalfinance
|
80/20 Careers Pareto Principle.
|
Hey guys,
Didn't really know where to post it. So I thought here might be good?
So I'm a huge fan of Tim Ferriss, love him or hate him, I followed his Slow Carb Diet, lost a ton of weight, put it all back on again (because I wanted to) and I'm back on it.
Anyways, he opened my eyes to the 80/20 Pareto principle. What 20% of effort receives 80% of the results. I've applied this approach to working out, my diet and now I want to see if I can apply it to my work life.
I know Ferriss has the 4 Hour Work Week which talks about lifestyle design and being able to work whilst enjoying your life. But, that's more for a professional environment. I work as a waiter in a restaurant! Typical film school graduate! So at the moment, I put in 80% of effort only to receive 20% income (minimum wage). I work hard and get little.
Obviously, I'm grateful I even have a job! The economy isn't great right now in the UK, jobs are hard to find. And I'm blessed with food on my table, a bed to sleep in at night, friends and family to hang out with. But I just want to sort out or "hack" my work life.
So I was wondering what jobs or careers are out there (worldwide) where you put in 20% of the effort to receive 80% income.
The one that comes to mind for me is blogging / vlogging. Minimum effort required, staying at home typing up a blog post about your daily adventures for example. Or filming a typical day in your life (vlogging).
Anyone else have any ideas of jobs or careers that work around the 80/20 principle.
Thanks!
|
What jobs or careers are out that that can be applied to the 80/20 Pareto principle. 20% of work producing 80% of income.
|
t3_3emgc4
|
travel
|
Traveling the coast of Croatia and using busses
|
Hey Reddit, I'm studying abroad in London starting in August and have a 10 day break in late September/Early October where I will be flying into Zadar, Croatia on a Monday and flying out that following Sunday out of Dubrovnik. So essentially me and some friends will be traveling down the coast, Zadar - Split - Dubrovnik; spending a few days in each city at hostels and such. **It looks like busses are the cheapest and easiest mode of transportation to each city. Is that true? Do you recommend booking bus tickets now or just doing it at each city while there? We have no set plan, nor do we truly want one, just need to make it to Dubrovnik by Sunday.**
Any suggestions are welcome. And thoughts on any hidden secrets/non-commercial places to visit along the way are always welcome. I've done a lot of research already and have a good grasp on what I want to do, but any tips or tricks are always useful! Thanks!
|
Do I book busses now in Croatia or is that something I can do when I am there?
|
t3_th46q
|
AskReddit
|
Reddit, 30 years from now what do you think will be the equivalent to a "classic rock radio station"?
|
This is a very ambiguous question but was just wondering the other day what kind of music will have taken the place of classic rock today when I'm 50 (so in 30 years), and what the equivalent to a classic rock radio station will be.
Just to be clear I don't mean what "rock music" will evolve into. I mean how classic rock was the music (of many) of our parents' youth and something is going to end up replacing it, what will it be? Could it be rap? Electronic music? And will radio stations be completely phased out? Do you think we will still be using online streaming (and if so will it be recognizable at all)?
|
When I'm an old fart, what music is going to define my generation and how am I going to listen to it?
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t3_ktro0
|
AskReddit
|
Can I be like the US and borrow my way to a lavish lifestyle?
|
Recently, I have found out about my parents credit card debt. They've been accruing high interest on them for many years... They had varying cards, multiple interest rates, just a mess to keep track of it all. I decided to consolidate it all under my name through low interest loans. Since then, I have transferred my debt from one bank to another about three times now while making payments on the principle whenever I can, all the while living modestly. What would happen if I borrow big, only pay towards interest, and keep borrowing? And I don't mean investing with that money either. I mean just to spend on whatever whim breezes by. At least until the inevitable US default. I'm so ashamed of my living conditions that only my closest friends have been over.
|
I have mountains of debt and live poorly. What are the **potential consequences** of amassing even more debt to live lavishly only paying towards interest to keep my account in good standing?
|
t3_13cc8f
|
AskReddit
|
What's the most immature way you've been dumped?
|
Since our relationship was long distance (temporarily 1,200 miles apart), my now ex-boyfriend's friend had been sending me "proof" via messenger that my bf was cheating on me for about a month. I kept giving my bf the benefit of the doubt because his friend was just telling me what he saw and I had not actually seen anything happen. After awhile I started piecing things together. About the time my bf met this girl, I hadn't been hearing from him for days at a time. This was the first time since we started dating that I had gone a day without a single text. His explanation was that he had been deathly ill with a sinus infection for a week and then work was so stressful that he didn't feel like talking to anyone. Ok, then...Fast forward a few weeks, this new girl started tagging him in places on Facebook. This was odd to me because he said that they were not close friends, just work acquaintances. Alright. No big deal. He can go out and be friends with other girls. Hmm...the tags quickly disappeared from his profile. Weird. One night after feeling pretty awesome about myself for running a marathon with no training, I got on Facebook to see what was going on and got a huge slap in the face. This girl posted pictures of my bf and her together with him tagged. At this point, he could no longer deny what was going on between them. When I told him that I saw the pictures, he denied it, said he never lied to me, and then blocked me on Facebook because he couldn't handle the stress and drama...
|
ex-boyfriend is a cheating doucherocket who blocked me on FB because he can't handle the drama he causes.
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t3_2zncd0
|
tifu
|
TIFU by laughing about a broken car radio.
|
It started today when my dad and I went to gas up my mom's car. He wanted to listen to a radio show on the way there, but I warned him that the buttons were broken and it was impossible to set, but he's the most stubborn person I've ever met. He attempted to set it, failed, and turned it off. After a few "I told you so"s we headed back home.
This is where the fuckup started. When I went in the house, I told my mom about the radio and she got mad. I was doubled over laughing about how much trouble my dad was gonna be in, but she took offense to it for some reason and stormed out in a rage. She sat in the car puching the radio buttons angrily for about thirty minutes when I realized she had left food cooking. I went out to ask her if I should turn the stove off, and she said "SHUT THE HELL UP I DON'T CARE. I REALLY DON'T CARE." I stomped off and asked my dad. We both got a hot dog not really caring if they were under or overcooked. I left the rest to burn, hoping it would teach her a lesson, but she sat in the car another thirty minutes. I finally decided to turn the stove off, and my dad managed to get her to come in. For some reason, she was in a full blown rage. She almost forced me to eat one of the badly burnt hot dogs until I convinced her that I had already ate. She's still stomping around the house pissed off at me as I type this. Today I fucked up, I guess?
|
Laughed about a broken radio, mom got ridiculously mad at me for it
|
t3_4zukt6
|
relationships
|
I [23M] been with my [25F] girlfriend for 7 years, but I can't handle it anymore in a sense.
|
For starters I'm only holding on because we have kids, growing up in a single parent home I hated it. We've fallen apart over the past year, she's throwing around marriage idea and I'm far from that.
I'm no longer sexuallly attracted to her, we've tried different things in the bedroom, even a inviting another women which was what I thought to be an ultimate fantasy, but her being there is couldn't stay turned on.
Tried date nights, telling her how I feel, gotten nowhere. In my head I believe it's time to end it, but she's so clingy I have no idea how to do it without it ending badly for the kids sake. A year ago I couldn't imagine living without her, past 8 months I've been dying inside to live without her.
|
Doesn't want to end longterm relationship because ofor kids, doesn't see any easy way to end it where she doesn't go crazy.
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t3_3m0o4a
|
tifu
|
TIFU By dropping 3 hours of labor on the floor
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(Sorry for shitty formatting, I'm on mobile)
(Also, this is the first TIFU I've posted)
So this happened about 15 minutes ago.
I'm a high school senior and for my senior project I decided to intern at the analytical lab at the nearby University. Since I'm new, they have me doing simple shit like inputting data in Excel and labelling boxes and whatnot. Today was my second day and they had me grinding up sand in a mortar and pestle. Pretty simple right? However, this isn't your average sand. This is sand with small rocks and shells in it, and it had to be ground into dust. Between me and this other guy we ground probably close to 40 grams of this stuff, but it took almost 3 hours. My hand was cramping and it fucking sucked. I spent almost my entire shift grinding this goddamn sand. So once I finished i was assigned to finally do some actual lab work! It was pretty simple: label the centrifuge vial, weigh the vial, weigh the dust, record it, clean your tools, start over. I only had to to do like 10 of these, and it was during the last 15 minutes the lab was open. So I get to like 5th vial, I go to scoop the dust, and wouldn't ya fucking guess it I drop it. No not just one, but all of them.
There's no saving it, it's scattered everywhere. All the dust samples were in weigh trays that were inside one of those tin foil containers you see at potlucks. And my stupid ass knocked over the tin container. At this point I'm apologizing profusely, informing them that I am, indeed, fucking stupid. The other lab students tell me to go wash off (I got dust all over my arm and leg) and they cleaned it up for me. They assured me that they have extras. However, I feel really awful for the guy who was working with me, grinding the samples. I don't think he knows it all went to shit.
|
dropped samples me and another guy spent 3 hours grinding, only to drop them all on the floor. Tomorrow I have to start over.
|
t3_2rd08e
|
relationships
|
[28M] How do I care about dating again?
|
With the rise in casual sex (facilitated by Tinder, the change in our culture, etc.), I just can't get worked up about dating anymore.
I still respect women and want to make sure their emotional needs are respected, but dating no longer is an existential drive for me. But for the women I meet, it seems very much to be. No matter what they say, they mostly seem to dream about marriage/kids/house/etc. with someone (even if it's not me).
I'm not depressed or anything -- my career is starting to take off, and I find that incredibly exciting. I still love my family and friends, and want to spend time with them. I'm active, I like to keep up with culture and current events, etc.
But dating is no longer mystical. Maybe if I met a woman I really clicked with it would be awesome, but dating and the compromise that entails with a total stranger has lost its luster. I've been single for about 1.5 years, and while I'm lonely at times, I'm mostly fine with it.
Is this a normal progression of feelings in an adult man?
|
Dating, while fun, no longer "drives" my life. The availability of casual sex I suspect has dampened the mystique of women. What should I do -- pretend to care about dating?
|
t3_3o6lfe
|
relationships
|
My (40m) GF (35f) is questioning our relationship because I am friends with waitresses.
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This is stupid. We don't live together but we each have an apartment in the same building, so we spend lots of time together when I'm there. We have been dating for 2 years. I work contract 4 days per week (I stay on-site 4 hours away and don't come home).
It gets pretty boring up here, and we work hard so most nights after work we head to the local pub. Admittedly we drink too much and stay too long. I know my girlfriend misses me, and I know I don't contact her enough. When I'm out drinking I usually don't think of it. I send a goodnight text when I get home. There's never been a problem.
Since I've been hanging out for hours every week at this bar, we get to know all the waitresses very well. Yes, they are all in their early 20s. There is definitely a "look" at this particular bar (skimpy dresses, sky-high heels). It's just the dress code. I know all of them well. I always tip very well and we are all really friendly and have fun together. None of us have ever hooked up.
The problem comes that my girlfriend recently noticed I'm friends on facebook with these young women. She then realized they were waitresses at the bar I go to all the time. It didn't go over well. She said it is one thing to go drinking but to become really friendly with the wait staff to the point that we are friends on Facebook and commenting on statuses makes her uncomfortable. She's also upset because there have been several times where I didn't come home right after work on my 4th night. Sometimes I instead choose to go to the bar first, which means instead of coming home to her at 9 pm I either stay over and come home early the next morning, or get home around 3 a.m. if one of the other guys (not drinking) is driving us all back.
She seems to think I spend more time with all these young girls than I do with her. She even says she is questionning our relationship.
|
My girlfriend never loved that I drink at bars so much when I work remote 4 nights a week (I think she's worried I'm developing an alcohol problem and spending too much money), but now she's really unhappy since learning I'm Facebook friends with all the young beautiful waitresses.
|
t3_2jrwzh
|
relationships
|
Me [19 M] with my friend [19 F] thinking of asking her out, but unsure if she's interested
|
So I met this girl 3 weeks ago at the start of uni at a lecture. We got on well, I got her number, and I've texted her most days to meet up to walk to lectures together. We've done this most times, but it's always been me that's initiated the texting. Not just texts for meeting up, but general conversation texts too.
About a week ago I texted her (as she was home) if she'd like to hang out outside of lectures some time for lunch. She replied saying she had anxiety issues with eating so lunch wouldn't be a great idea. I then proposed just a coffee, and she replied she didn't like coffee but loved hot chocolate. So we agreed to meet for hot chocolate some time in the future. This still hasn't happened.
I've asked her twice about this hot chocolate and both times have been bad times for her. My friend looked at my texts so I could see what her impression of her was, and she felt she was being quite self-centred, especially as I was the one making the conversation go forward.
She also seems to have a few guy friends, and one in particular I think she may have an interest for, or they may be friends I'm not sure. However whenever they talk she seems pretty involved.
But then there are signs that she may like me, such as having a good time with me, and wanting to sit next to me even though she's with her group of friends (but then again that may be a polite thing as I didn't really know her friends so she probably didn't want to leave me on my own).
It's been driving me up the wall not knowing if she's interested, and my current plan is to hopefully see her tomorrow, ask her in person when's a good time to have a hot chocolate, and then ask her out at the end of the hot chocolate session.
Am I overthinking this? Do you think she's interested, or just being friendly? Should I go for it?
|
Thinking of asking out my friend of 3 weeks who I'm unsure if she's interested in me or not. She may have a thing for someone else and/or just being friendly to me.
|
t3_2pmu64
|
relationships
|
I [20M] with my girlfriend [19F] of 3y, I think I'm being abusive, but also think I'm partially in the right here.
|
Okay, Reddit... I think I'm either totally right, crazy, or abusive.
My girlfriend and I have a pretty smooth relationship most of the time. However, yesterday, I lit her the fuck up for not answering me for a few hours. She claims she was busy, and probably was, but I got pissed off at her and berated her. I admit I made a lot of assumptions and that I overreacted, but the reason I was bothered by it is that this was the last thing in a long line of very small things that make me question whether she's really still in the relationship (yes, I realize the irony of blowing up at someone because they may have a foot out the door).
It's finals time, and she's kind of down because of a lot of things not going her way this month/semester/year. That could easily explain why she's been reserved lately, but like I said, I tend to assume the worst when I don't get a forthright explanation. She says she doesn't explain these negative things to her because I'll get mad. I wonder if it's that, or is she hiding something?
During our argument yesterday, I *really* took out everything I've kept to myself on her at once. I called her worthless and threatened to break up with her for being such a dumbass. She mostly tried to discount my argument and tell me I had nothing to be worried about- did nothing to address the logical parts of my side of things.
I know I crossed some lines during the argument but I can't help but feel as if she's using it as ammunition to gaslight me from noticing what she's up to.
Then again, I obviously have some paranoia, so I could be deluding myself.
She reached out today and opened with a breakup line. She didn't follow through with it, but she continued to make me feel as if I was completely baseless in everything I said.
|
Girlfriend fell off the radar for a few hours, and blew up at her. She is playing the victim card, which is logical, but I have a nagging feeling there's more at play. **I need advice on how to control my anger, and also how to assess whether she's simply hurt or blowing smoke up my ass.**
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t3_qqp6d
|
AskReddit
|
Just having a hard time right now.
|
I feel like I have no one I can actually talk to. My best friend is my GF. Been with her for almost two years now, been trying to have a baby for the last four months, but nothing yet. We have both just turned thirty, and we live very well together. She doesn't handle stress very well so I tend to not tell her about my troubles. She panics and it accomplishes absolutely nothing.
My job is slowing down and my hours are going down as well. I have done great things in my past, but now, for some reason I feel worthless. I have a bad heart, which makes sex tough. I am running 3 times a week, but I start to get chest pains and I an feel my pulse in my neck. I still do 4 miles though, even if I have to walk the last two. I skipped going to college to get a job and get out on my own. My life isn't exciting anymore. I work Monday through Friday, hit the bar with a few friends on Friday night and just kick it around the house on the weekend because my truck costs too much to drive.
My gf and I have a decent life together. We both work hard and we support ourselves.She wants me to marry her and start a family with her. But I am starting to think we can't have children, and our credit is too poor to buy a house. Some times I have to be told everything will be ok so I do not stress myself into a anxiety attack. There is a part of me that wants to walk, and let her have the life she always wanted with some one that can give it to her, and the other part of me still thinks that that person is me.
Advice?
|
just a wall of text of me bitching about my life. Feels good to get it out.
|
t3_1qiqdp
|
relationships
|
My GF [21F] of 4 years cheated on me, BF [24M] while I was deployed over a year ago.
|
I found out yesterday that she cheated on me in August 2012 while I was deployed. I read a FB message where she was flirting with another person, and proceeded to question her about it. She said she had sex with a guy friend twice, during a two week period. She does seem very regretful, and genuinely sorry about it. She was hysterically crying while we talked about it over the phone. She said I didn't do anything wrong in our relationship and it was just a mistake. As of now, we are on a break.
Our relationship has been fantastic, other than this ordeal. We get along well, rarely fight, and have similar interests. We were planning on moving in together this January, but thats on hold for now. She wants to continue the relationship. A part of me wants to continue the relationship as well because it was so good, but I don't know how I will ever trust her again.
I guess I just want some advice on how to deal with this. Should I forgive her? Should I end the relationship? How will I get over it if we continue? How long should the break be? I just have no idea how to handle the situation.
Thank you!
|
GF cheated while I was deployed, found out via interrogation, she's genuinely sorry, Should I continue the relationship?
|
t3_13c3yi
|
Advice
|
My Brother
|
I come from an Israeli family. My father, brother, sister, cousins, and my entire paternal side of the family all had to serve in the Israeli Defense Forces. I'm fortunate enough to have been born and raised in Canada. Anyways, my brother Erez is my role model. He graduated from university with a BA, he's a male model, and he's just the best guy I know. Well anyways, most of you probably know what's going on right know between Gaza and Israel. Well Erez let me know today that he has been drafted from the reserves in a last-minute emergency recruitment, and that he has to go fight in Gaza. I shouldn't be worried, as I know Israel can generally hold their own in battle, but I'm really scared that something could happen to him. I know that whenever a military force wins a war and starts celebrating, there's also the families from their side that have to mourn the loss of someone close who "fought bravely to win this war". I just wouldn't be able to stand it if something were to happen to Erez.
|
My brother was recruited to fight terrorists and I'm scared something might happen to him.
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t3_396jmp
|
personalfinance
|
Convince me to pay extra on my student loans
|
Be gentle, PF, first post here. I know the math says always pay extra on loans when you can, but I'm balancing that advice against peace of mind lost or gained, and overall quality of life. So here are some numbers:
*35 y/o
*$34,000 in student loans at 2%
*No other debt except mortgage which is less than 80% value of the house, fixed at less than 4% interest, and on track to be paid off years before retirement
*4 months of expenses in FDIC, liquid account
*4 months of expenses in a brokerage account
*More than a year's worth of salary in tax deferred retirement account
*$75k salary
**I will obviously pay the minimum payment every month.** The student loan payment is ridiculously low, so paying it off early wouldn't affect much in my monthly budget, but of course it's on a very long term with increased payments toward the end. Yes, I will definitely pay extra / pay it off early in later years, but I'm struggling with whether or not I should do so **now** when that later gain might be shadowed by the loss of cash during these years I'm about to start a family.
|
In terms of "cash anxiety" is it worth it to pay extra on my student loans now, or just wait until I can pay them off completely?
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t3_18zh7j
|
pettyrevenge
|
No karma for you!
|
I was volunteering to assist my local police by acting as an assistant proctor for a written test for some prospective new hires. Note: I have zero input regarding who gets hired. I was just passing out and collecting papers. Also, cleaning up, pushing in chairs, etc.
Nobody left a mess, but not everyone pushed their chairs in when they left, which means I have to do it later. Not a big deal, but I'm petty. To anyone who was adult enough to leave a place the way they found it, I whispered "good luck" when they brought me their test, but to anyone who wasn't taught this or just dropped on their head as a child I would give an internally sarcastic "thanks."
|
If you can't push in your chair, then you don't deserve my mediocre karma!
|
t3_brlys
|
AskReddit
|
I know Reddit is a community, but is it a culture?
|
For my cultural anthropology course, I have to write an ethnography about a culture. I chose to write about Reddit, and I want to get your take. I'm hoping to foster some discussion about the influence of Reddit on your daily life, if any.
Some points/questions I've been thinking about:
Reddit as a grammar revitalization movement on the internet; Reddit expects comments to be rational and thought out.
The fact you take up an identity on Reddit, and try to defend its karma.
Does karma determine who you are in any way shape or form?
Do you consider voting a service to other Redditors, or just a demonstration of your opinion?
When a hot story is on the front page 5 times, what do you do?
Does Reddit affect how you act on other websites? IRL?
Are you a Redditor?
What are some constant themes of Reddit?
|
Does Reddit reaffirm your perception of the world?
|
t3_iv0jn
|
personalfinance
|
Identity theft/fraud or a mistake?
|
Looking for opinions from people knowledgeable about identity theft or have dealt with it.
A couple months back I had some fraudulent charges on a credit card I rarely use. I thought it was weird that someone got my card number when I never use it.
This brought me to pull up a credit report on myself. I am 25 and haven't payed attention to my credit. On my credit report I found a card opened in July of 2000 in a state I have never lived in. I was 14 at the time so I did not open this card nor did my parents. The card is in good standing (no delinquent payments) and has a balance of $3,000.
Other than that, I don't see any other fraudulent activity.
**Question**: Is this mysterious credit card under my account a mistake or fraud? It seems weird that someone would make payments on it for 11 years.
Should I go about removing it as if it were fraud or contact credit agencies to challenge it as a mistake?
The funny thing is that it seems to be boosting my credit score because the only other card I have has been open for 4 years.
|
There's a credit card on my credit report that I didn't open with a $3,000 balance. Is this a possible mistake or fraud?
|
t3_1873g4
|
pettyrevenge
|
No one insults my Grandma and gets away with it
|
When my mum was a kid, money was tight. Not quite paycheck-to-paycheck, but not far off.
When my mother was in primary school (about 6 or 7 years old), she was invited to a birthday party for one of the kids in her year. While she was there, this perfect-princess, rich-and-obnoxious girl from her school (who was already on the path to becoming a total bitch) decided it was a good idea to inform my mother that the party dress she was wearing was hideously ugly, because it had been handmade by my grandmother rather than having been bought from a store like hers. She continued to rub my mum's nose in her comparative poverty and insult my grandma's work at length, before eventually getting bored and deciding to go find someone else to be a bitch to.
As you can imagine, my mother was furious. She loved that dress **because** my grandma had taken the trouble to make it for her, and decided she would have her revenge. Now, the girl in question had long blonde ringlets that she was obsessively proud of. My mum had been eating a toffee when Bitchchild came up to her, and as she turned to walk away, my mother very quickly and carefully took the toffee out of her mouth and stuck it dead centre in this girl's hair.
The toffee wasn't spotted by anyone for a while, by which time it was completely stuck. Snobgirl ended up having to have that piece of hair cut off, which in turn required all her hair to be cut short to match. She cried. My mother gloated. And no one ever knew it was her.
|
Rich snobby girl makes fun of my mother for having a homemade dress; my mother causes her to have all her hair cut off.
|
t3_261tny
|
relationships
|
How do I (19F) tell my (25M) boyfriend that his liking models/pornstars on facebook bothers me?
|
I consider myself pretty sex-positive, and I'm completely fine with him watching porn in private, but this habit of his makes me really uncomfortable for some reason. I'm worried though that if I tell him how I feel, he'll perceive me as needy and suffocating. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's pretty tacky that he makes his pornstar preferences pretty public.
Even if he refuses, or says yes and continues to do it anyway, I don't want to break up with him because he is pretty much the perfect boyfriend in every other aspect. Is this even worth bringing up?
|
Boyfriend keeps liking pornstars on facebook, I don't really know how to deal with my emotions.
|
t3_3bpz6o
|
relationships
|
Hey! I'm [24M] in limbo with my ex [23 F] any advice?
|
Here's the story: I met a girl in college. We fell hard for each other and things got serious quickly. She began having doubts and this scared me so I broke it off. The breakup was super messy. After a few months I realized my mistake and I tried to get her to take me back. She was angry and wanted nothing to do with me. I pined for her for a long time. She's was the one that got away.
Fast forward two years and I'm about to graduate and have just accepted a placement with a program called JVC (it's kinda like a Jesuit peace corps) in Nicaragua. She and I hadn't spoken in two years except for sporadic emails and we weren't on necessarily friendly terms. We had both dated other people in the meantime.
Out of the blue I get an email asking to meet up. She says she'd like for us to be on better terms. I tell her I'm cautious and think it's a bad idea. We meet for coffee and hit it off again. We spend the majority of that weekend together and by the end are talking about getting back together. We spendmuch of the next month together. We live in different cities so I was traveling up to see her.
Things begin moving forward quickly and we start talking about how this would work. She is very worried about getting hurt again and me leaving. She then says that she needs an indefinite amount of time to sort some things out of her end. Since then we haven't spoken.
|
rekindled things with "the one that got away" but am leaving for foreign country for two years and things are anything but a sure thing with her
|
t3_3rsg8p
|
relationships
|
Me [00 M/F] with my brother [32 M] and his girlfriend [32F] have both let me know they have worries in the relationship. Anything I can do to get them to talk?
|
I'll keep this short. My brother and his girlfriend have both texted me over the past month that they have concerns about different aspects of the relationship. Both of them are worried that it will be ending soon due to different aspects on the other end. At first it was just her, but my brother just let me know he had some worries. The problem is, they both said they don't want the other knowing that they told me.
They are both my good friends, I consider them both family at this point. They were there for me during a really rough period in my life recently and I would hate to see them split apart. I am considering sending a simple text to both of them 'Over the past month you have each expressed concerns with the other about your relationship. I am telling you this because you both mean a great deal to me and I would hate to see things mess up between you two because of things going unsaid. Please get together and lay all your cards on the table and work this out.'.
Thoughts or suggestions?
|
brother and his girlfriend have both texted me about worries in the relationship (completely different worries), and I would like to somehow let them both know they need to sit down and talk.
|
t3_2hh37k
|
relationships
|
I (23/m) broke up with the perfect girl (23/f) for me...
|
This girl is amazing. Everything I possibly could want in a girl she had. And most of all she loved me immensely. She would have loved me no matter what, in good health and bad.
Yet, I could never say I love you back. She was so in love with me I got scared. I don't know why and it sounds stupid when I type it, but this girl was falling me so hard and I was just not ready for it despite her being an ideal life partner.
Enough doubt came in my mind that I just broke up with her. It wasn't pretty, and I broke her heart after 4 months of dating. This poor girl that loved me so much, I took her heart and ripped it to shreds. It kills me to know that I did this to her. I now feel like the worlds biggest asshole, and am second guessing my decision.
Was this a valid reason to break up with someone? Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did it end up in the long run?
|
I broke up with the perfect girl because I didn't love her as much as she loved me. Did I do the right thing?
|
t3_36b27n
|
relationship_advice
|
What should I do.
|
All right,
There's this girl who I share mutual friends with, she's been over seas and has come home for a few months. So on Friday I invite her to come out with me and well we drank a little to much, end up in bed together making out (we stayed at a mutual friends). That's fine I'm not a guy to get hung up over that, but the next morning she was trying to come home with me, I say no it's a bad idea cause I feel like one of my roommates is liking her, I even asked the people who were with us and we are all in agreement.
So as I'm leaving she goes fine I will spend the day with another guy, this doesn't bother me. But the Saturday we had a people over for a farewell of a friend. So she is dropped off by the guy she spent all day with, she walks in and see's me watching a movie an try's to cuddle I have walls up automatically for about a hour this goes on.
Now the roommate who we all believe is liking her comes home, not even 20 mins later she flirting like crazy with him. Now it's like 12am and she is asking to stay over, I offer to take her home but no she is persistent. So she ends up staying over. Spends the night with the roommate and the next day together. I talked to him that night and said you're playing with fire and talked about what happened Friday, plus she spent the whole day with another guy. So next morning I'm talking to him while she sleeps he says he has huge feelings for her and has for weeks, this is the first I hear of this.
So now I feel like shit for what happened Friday, my roommate/good friend is getting played to a fucking fiddle and she is just going to keep destroying everything she touches. All advice or opinions are greatly appreciated.
|
bitch fucking the whole circle of friends but she ain't no jennifer aniston.
|
t3_339u3c
|
relationships
|
Me [23M] with my ex-GF [25F] 7 months, she turned out to be an escort. Today she gave me some seriously bad news...
|
Some of you may remember that a few months ago I started a post about my GF who turned out to be an escort, gave me gonorrhea, she admitted to lots of stuff like having another guy, paid unsafe sex, anyway... We broke up and I tried to get over her. After a few months I was feeling quite alright, some minor downs, some ups. Things were kind of okay. We started talking to each-other again. Which wasn't easy but it was sort-of mandatory due to the fact that we work on a project together that ends in June. Fast forward to...
Today we had a fight about her not doing her part of the project and why she is able to spend time with her new boyfriend, go on vacation for 10 days, etc. but not able to enter our data before the deadline (an hour ago, today). Then she dropped the bomb on me. She told me she still loved me, she was sorry about everything but it no longer mattered. She told me she has cancer. The prognosis is bad.
I'm torn. Not sure what to do. In fact I don't even know why I'm writing this stuff in another post on reddit. I feel bad for having a fight with her, although I guess she can't blame me since I didn't know. I feel bad for lots of things. Suddenly what she did to me seems so irrelevant. What should I do? Do I get back in touch on a personal level - do I keep her at a distance despite the fact that I loved her, cared about her? I'm unable to decide.
|
Cheating ex-GF told me she loved me, she has cancer. I don't know what to do.
|
t3_zb4o8
|
relationships
|
Pre-cohabitation communication issues. F28 M34
|
He's 34, I'm 28. Together two years, currently long distance but not for much longer. Mostly great, heading toward marriage. We plan on moving in together as soon as my contract is up, but I'd really like to solve a few communication issues beforehand.
Issue #1: we have different definitions of what plans mean. For me, when we say we're going to do something, that means it's actually going to happen unless otherwise specified. He, on the other hand, often flakes or changes his mind. When I complain, he says he knows we discussed it but didn't think it was a solid plan. This often comes up in minor situations--such as dinner plans, or a party to go to--and though it bugs me, I'd let the little things go if it didn't sometimes happen with stuff that's really important as well. When it happens with big things (e.g. plans to visit me), I am left feeling disappointed and a bit betrayed.
Issue #2: when I bring up problems, he sometimes blows them way out proportion. For example, he's pretty messy and I nicely suggested hiring a cleaner as a compromise. He took it extremely personally, started going on about how I must think he's so lazy, gross, etc. This doesn't happen a lot, but when it does, he twists my words and I feel so backed into a corner that I end up crying with frustration. He always apologizes afterward, but these scenarios keep repeating.
He acknowledges that both of these are valid problems and is sorry, but I'm at a loss as to how to change it unless he just stops doing what he's doing. For me it's really simple: I say what I mean--with respect--and expect the same. It makes communication so easy.
We would go to counseling in a heartbeat if we were in the same state. As it stands, it just isn't feasible. I can feel resentment creeping in and I want to stop it ASAP.
Has anyone had similar experiences? Concrete suggestions would be very appreciated.
|
boyfriend flaky + boyfriend takes things waaay too personally. girlfriend sad.
|
t3_10snis
|
AskReddit
|
Why is it bad to tell a girl that she should dress more modestly because she might get raped?
|
Okay guys, your immediate answer is somewhere along the lines of, "Because rape is not a womans fault hurrderr!"
But lets look at a very similar situation. (Hypothetical situation, before you atheist antagonists hop up on this...)
Let's say I am a Jew. Let's say that I would like to express my love of Judaism by running through the streets of Tehran proclaiming my love of God and of my fellow Jews. If I did that though, I know that there is a possibility that a Muslim, upon hearing my joyous proclamation, gets so riled up that he kills me. (Not all Muslims hate Jews. Yeah? Well not all men are rapists, so I will continue before you even say it.)
Furthermore, If I informed my fellow Jews of my yearning to embark on this glorious quest, those same Jews would tell me it was a bad idea, because i could be killed!
If I did get killed, a court would not say that my murder was my fault, it would be the murderer's fault.
But i shouldn't have been there. And I shouldn't have been acting in that way.
I am not saying that rape is a woman's fault. It isn't. But why is it so bad to suggest prudence? Shouldn't caution be taken, given the circumstances under which we live?
|
You would tell a JEW not to go to Iran, but you won't tell a woman to not go to parties.
|
t3_2jfeer
|
relationships
|
Me [24 M] with my Mother [312 /M] Treats Me Like I'm 12.
|
Hey look, a title that can be misinterpreted in some way as incest. I've no idea how old she is by the way, hence the random age in the title.
Alright boys and girls, let's kick this off and get straight to it.
I'm living at home with mother and I have been for some time, shocking I know. She had a mental breakdown a few years ago and I've been looking after her ever since. I know right, aren't I the sweetest thing? But since then she's treated me like I'm 12 years old.
By this I mean, for example, when I take her shopping she'll tell me to look both ways when crossing a road, tells me to look out for traffic and to be careful. When shopping for food she'll tell me what I can and cannot buy or eat because I'm a growing boy or things will make me hyperactive (candy, chocolates, etc). As you can imagine, it's incredibly embarrassing and somewhat annoying. She won't let me go out at night because it's dangerous and there's bad people out there.
She also guilt trips me when I want to visit and stay with my girlfriend who lives a few hours away. E.g. "I'm going to be all alone in this big house..." and then goes off on a long conversation about fires, if something happens which requires an ambulance, etc
What do I do? I've sat down with her dozens of times and told her to stop treating me like a child but she still does. It's becoming a problem and starting to effect my life in a negative way. I've no way of moving out either.
|
Mother treats me like I'm 12. What do.
|
t3_4dvlsv
|
relationships
|
How can I [M 30] explain to my manager [F 40+] that I don't want to be contacted in my free time
|
My job is Mon - Fri, 9-5. There is no special obligation for me to work outside of those hours, although of course it is a good will of employees to sometimes want to go that extra mile.
My job is fine, and my manager is very nice and she really sticks up for me. We have a good professional relationship. My GM though is an idiot who doesn't understand anything about the place or job descriptions and he is responsible for my salary. He didn't give me the desired raise when I asked, and I think that I am not being paid my worth, which others agree with.
Still, I can't complain, I know what it's like to be unemployed, I have only myself to support and I have it pretty good. I just don't have any strong incentive to do more than good job during my work hours, which I do. Actually, even this issue aside, I feel strongly about my personal time.
My manager is ambitious to prove some points in the company though, and sometimes she wants me to send some emails or make some posts in my free time - and it's nothing much at all on case by case basis, I just don't want this to become a thing. She asked me to do something last Friday after work and it did annoy me because I have the right for my alone time and I don't need to be connected to wifi or available to pick up the phone. But then she called me again on Saturday. It's small things, and i don't want to be rude to her, but I don't feel compelled to answer. I just want to enjoy my privacy.
Of course every now and then there will be an emergency and I will eventually have to get back to her, so I would like to just get it out of the way and explain that I don't want to work in my free time unless it's a special circumstance, or be called in my free time.
How can I do this while still being polite and appreciative of her as a manager, and I know that if it was up to her she'd pay me a lot more than I get now?
|
I work 9-5, and care strongly about my private time. I have a very nice and ambitious manager who is very supportive, but the upper management is shit and my salary gives me no incentive to do more than a very good job during my work hours (not that I'd want work to be my life anyway.) My manager has small requests she'd like me to do in my free time and she calls me on weekends/after work. I want to politely explain that I have a life (even if it consists of drinking and redditing) and want to only be contacted for special occasions and emergencies. The things she wants me to do are small but it annoys me to be contacted during weekend over it.
|
t3_1sinn4
|
relationships
|
I [22F] matched with an ex [23M] on tinder...
|
Sorry in advance if this seems like a stupid situation/question/whatever. Anyway, the beginning of this year I met this guy and we ended up dating for a few months. However, neither of us was really sure what we wanted and he wasn't over his ex so things ended up falling apart relatively amicably, though I will say I liked him quite a bit. We didn't stay in touch- we were never friends before we dated- and haven't been in contact since. This ended around 4 months ago.
So the other night his little face popped up on my tinder (dating-ish app). I was curious/missed him/whatever and "liked" him. Well, this morning it popped up that it was a mutual match- meaning he "liked" me too.
He hasn't said anything and neither have I but I would like to. I have no idea what to say or if I should even say anything. Does him "liking" me necessarily mean he would be interested in hearing from me or what?
Really just looking for some opinions on this slightly weird situation.
Thanks in advance
|
Matched w a guy I used to date on tinder. Would like to talk to him but I don't know what to say!
|
t3_w3xgv
|
AskReddit
|
What was your "It's not what it looks like story" where it really wasn't what it looked like.
|
Had a walk down memory lane with my siblings and big sister reminded me of a time she was freaked out and made me cry.
Anyways, when I was 10 years old, I had a huge interest in marbles. Not sure what the game was called but it involved laying down marbles in a center of a circle and trying to hit them out of the circle with 1 marble. I had just set up the game up and my 6 year little sister laid down to watch. Her shirt was small and her bellybutton was sticking out so, so for some strange reason wanted to use the bellybutton as a placeholder for the marble where you would flick that marble to hit the centerpool of marbles in the circle. Little sister was resisting because the marble was cold and I yelled out "Let me put it in the hole!"
Big sister had walked by at the this momment and it didn't look right. So I got called a freak and yelled at. Cried while trying to explain, little sister tells what happens and I lost my interest in marbles because of that. Big sister reveals to me 9 years later on what she thought I was doing and why she was so freaked out.
|
I was trying to lay a marbles on my little sisters stomach, little sister was resisting so I yell "let me put it in the hole!" Big sister walks by thinking I was attempting to anal bead or pussy bead my 6yr old little sister. "Its not what it seems!"
|
t3_319hqs
|
relationships
|
Me [17M] with my girlfriend [17F], I feel guilty of wasting my virginity
|
I lost my virginity a year ago in a way that I am not proud of. I was drunk and being a stupid teenager.
I also just had my first time with my current girlfriend (her first time) last night. She is the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with. She gave me her first time in such a smarter way than I decided to waste mine, and I guess you could say that I feel jealous, and depressed that I could not have the other perfect half. She deserves better.
How do I get over the guilt of wasting my virginity, and focusing on my girlfriend, our sex life, and being happy together? It is taking a toll.
|
Lost virginity last year, just had first time with current girlfriend, her first, and I feel guilty. Help
|
t3_4t70y6
|
relationships
|
Me [23/F] with my [27 M] ex. Ghosted him.
|
Rough relationship with my Ex. We had a slur of breakups and times getting back together. I had not contacted him for 2 months since May and ended things "officially" back then. As I am leaving to start graduate school in a few days I decided I needed closure from the terror that was our relationship and contacted him 6 days ago. He came running back and the abusive cycle came up all over again. He told me he loved me, would make an LDR work all of this crazy stuff and that we would eventually get married.
My family hates him for many reasons. He's broke my car window, hit me with a book, you name it..But boy is he a charmer and a talker that makes you believe anything. Last night I left him with I love you's and I'll marry you's on both sides, spent the night with my brother and realized I was afraid to leave him again out of fear. He sent me an I love you text and I changed my number and blocked him off everything. What do you guys think about this situation. Feel free to ask for more details.
|
ghosted my ex after abusive relationship
|
t3_rqbcd
|
AskReddit
|
Why does r/atheism seem like a bunch of angry teenagers mocking religion?
|
I posted this here because of course it would get downvoted to oblivion in that subreddit. So, before I say anything let me point out that I am not a religious person at all really, I guess you could consider me Agnostic. So I am not biased against them due to religious reasons. I have done everything i can to unsubscribe, however it still ends up on my front page.
The whole subreddit is a joke. Half of the posts are fake facebook posts, and the other half are attempts to mock and show hatred for religion basically. Now I know that maybe Atheists deny existence of any God, but I still don't get this subreddit. A lot of the posts talk about how bad religion is and how religious people are crazy blah blah blah etc. Honestly, this subreddit is worse than any "religious freak" I have ever seen. They claim that they don't like religion because they are against things such as pre marital sex, being gay, etc.(You could really name so many, it really depends on the religion). Yet all I see these people do is generalize ALL religious people and show hatred and make a mockery of what they believe in. It is just sad. One of the most hypocritical "communities" I have ever seen. There is little to no intellectual conversations(You know, what you would think an atheism board would entail), really just a circlejerk of what seems to be angry teenagers trying to "get back" at religions.
I subscribed to the subreddit when I was new to reddit, thinking maybe I could gain more knowledge or participate in some sort of somewhat intelligent conversation. What I see is a bunch of kids trying to show off how they mocked their facebook friend for believing in God. Maybe I am just venting, but I want to know what other people think about this, or if I am alone on this one.
|
r/atheism in a [nutshell](
|
t3_1u1sfe
|
relationships
|
How do I [25 M] and my best friend [25 F] explain to her mom ["49" F] that I will be her daughter's "Man of Honor"
|
My best friend of 8, nearly 9 years is engaged to a great guy and she has asked me to be her maid of honor. The catch is, I am a dude.
Her fiance is happy with this arrangement, but her Mom has a traditional view of how weddings should work. She is by no means a stuffy conservative. This is not going to cause a dramatic "wedding threatening issue."
It will "break her heart" and cause her some emotional turmoil that **nobody** wants her to deal with. She will also probably try to talk my friend out of her decision. I know this will not change my friend's mind, but it will cause my friend stress that she does not need to deal with ** because we already have a goddamned wedding to plan.**
---
The mother knows me pretty well, and she likes me. She even calls me occasionally when she is having problems with her daughter. I know her reticence will have nothing to do with me personally. She just needs to warm up to the idea of dudes being in the bridal party.
---
Reddit, what are some strategies I can use to explain to this woman that I am going to be the man of honor and that is all going to be **okay**?
|
How do I explain to a mother who wants a traditional wedding for her daughter that there is going to be a "man of honor?"
|
t3_qh5wi
|
AskReddit
|
I'm pretty sure that the baby next door is crying way too much. And sometimes it sounds like pure, incessant agony.
|
It's 2pm in the afternoon on a Sunday and all I can hear is a baby crying and screaming next door. I live in a terraced house in West London, England, in a town called Southall (known for it's major Indian and Pakistani inhabitants). The sound is faint because the walls are thick enough, but when I tune into the sound then I begin to feel pretty disturbed.
It was also happening 12 hours ago when I was trying to get to sleep. I was really high, so my heightened sense of compassion made for a pretty disturbing experience. It's being ongoing for a couple of weeks.
Let's cut to the chase, if there is a baby being abused or neglected then I want to save it. But how do I go about this?
I'll provide any information I can to help someone help me. I don't care about the loss of sleep, I just need to know that nothing too serious is going on.
|
A baby is crying constantly next door. I need to know how I can determine if it definitely isn't getting abused.
|
t3_2qzx26
|
relationships
|
My (27/M) wife (26/F) is depressed and in a really dead end job. How do I support her?
|
We have been together for about 7 years, and we were married 4 months ago.
My wife is a EIT/FE(Licensed Engineer in Training), but she has worked in a fundamental testing role for the last year and a half. The requirements of the job are significantly below her qualifications.
Her manager for the last 1.5 years ended his life a couple weeks ago. They were pretty close, and it has been really hard for her. She had been depressed before, but she's super depressed now. I have been encouraging her to find another job for a while.
Not to mention that her grandmother passed away, and her family's dog and cat too in the last year. Her 17 year-old cat we're loving and caring for is having kidney failure and doesn't have much longer.
I'm really frustrated. I want her to be be happy, but she is in a really stuck situation. All her animal companions are passing, her job is well below her skills and qualifications, some of her family has died, and it's a raw deal regardless for the year.
I made cheers on new years for "some good things in 2014" and "for each other" she regarded that the best thing this year was our wedding.
she is really depressed, and I don't know how to help her.
|
My wife is really depressed, and I don't know how to help her.
|
t3_3duckp
|
tifu
|
TIFU by not doing crystal meth
|
Ok, so this happened yesterday first of all.
I was going through the application process of becoming a State Trooper, and I had made it pretty far. I first did the physical test - pass. The written test, high score - pass. I then had an interview.. did well. Then I get to go to the polygraph test. The polygraph test is essentially an extensive background investigation where you admit all the bad things you have done (drug usage, theft (from stores and employers), vandalism, etc. I wrote everything down, and then get hooked up to the machine.
I kept getting caught on the question that was worded, "Are you witholding any information about your past drug usage?" and I would say no, and that would show up as a lie. On top of that, my baseline lies (lies that are intentional during the test) weren't even picking up as lies. My baseline lie was "Have you ever lied to your mom or dad?"
They bring in two different detectives and they sit me down and hand me a paper with a bunch of drugs on it including meth, crack, heroin, etc. He goes "alright forget everything else, what have you done on here that you're not telling us," and I told him the truth with was nothing, and then failed the test for a second time. I could've just said I smoked meth to get it over with, but that would've been a lie too. So after bawling my eyes out in that parking lot, I got really drunk, and here I am laying in bed hungover.
so
|
I failed my polygraph because they thought I smoked meth, when I've never even seen it.
|
t3_44n2pj
|
relationships
|
Me [25 M] with my Wife[35F] 3 years (married 1.5), feel like I'm unhappy about our relatioship because of no/minimal sex...Am I doing something wrong
|
I'm 25, my wife is 35 (big difference, I know). We have a lot in common and get a long pretty well (for the most part).
In 2013, when we met (at work), we hit it off right away. I didn't want to sleep with her on our first date because I was doing this with all these other girls I wasn't really into, and I really liked who my wife was/is as a person and didn't want to ruin that.
After having a child, in 2014 (we got pregnant right away), we got married because we loved each other. We just lost our infant daughter in December due to a kidney disease she had as well, which was hard, but we are doing better now (of course never going to get over it)
Basically, to make a long story short, we haven't been intimate in at least six months and it has now been about seven weeks since our daughter's death, we are both fine mentally about it, but I feel like intimacy is very important in a relationship and I've been dying because I feel like I can connect so much better with my wife when we are this way.
Before this, immediately after we got married, intimacy had slowly started to dissipate in our relationship. I do what females say turns them on too - clean the house, do dishes, play with our son, take care of myself, etc...I even let her be a stay-at-home mom. What am I doing wrong? I feel like if I keep "pushing her" for being intimate with me, we won't ever be that way...she could live just fine without intimate with me, but I can't. It is very important to me. Any advice?
Thanks in advance
|
Wife is much less in intimate than I am and it's affecting our relationship
|
t3_1r3w16
|
loseit
|
Is beer worse than other types of calories for weight loss?
|
Question's in the subject. I was doing great last year, but fell off the wagon around March and have been struggling to turn it around since. Last week, I made the necessary changes and got back on the path to continuing to lose, and I feel great. However, I think my love of beer is one of the big reasons I fell off immediately - I love craft brews, and I think cutting them out entirely, or limiting them to only the specialest of occasions was a mistake. I want to know if beer is evil for any particular reason, or if it's just like any other source of calories.
|
If I can find room in my daily calorie intake for a 200 calorie beer, is there any reason I can't have it?
|
t3_4d9e42
|
relationships
|
Does she like me or does she just want to be friends?
|
I'm a [19/m] college student. I just met this girl [21/f] who sits at the front desk of my dormitory. We had a nice, spur-of-the-moment conversation that lasted over 45 minutes. She was smiling at me the whole time and she laughed at every other thing I said. There were no real dull moments in the conversation, although she did occasionally look at her iPad screen, sometimes showing me what was on it.
I teased her a lot and she seemed to enjoy it. A couple of times she said I was weird, but she was always giggling and smiling when she said it. We talked about stuff like travel, our hobbies... When I mentioned that I want to be a director, she asked if she could star in one of my movies.
At the end of her shift, she had to go to the library to start working on her homework and I asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime and she told me to see her at her next shift.
|
Do you think she was flirting with me or just being friendly?
|
t3_3pttlt
|
relationships
|
[Update]Me [36 F] with my Husband [39 M] (15years married), I found out that my husband has a secret family, i dont know if i can stay with him.
|
1st Post
***
Today i had lunch with the other woman. Shes only fucking 23...
Lets call her Candi(She looks like a Candi). Candi is from Vegas. and my husband flew her out, and put her up. She doesnt work. she goes to school. which im guessing my Husband also pays for.
She says that Ted told her that he had decided to take me back, and he broke it off with her back then. She didnt find out she was pregnant until later. She had planned on taking care of the kid on her own, until her job in vegas fell though, and she had no where else to turn.
Basically, Ted finds out he has a kid, Flew Candi and her son out to us, and has been supporting them every since.
I asked her if she knew that Ted and I were still together. She did.
I asked her if she knew that Ted had been lying to me this entire time, she did. Then i asked her if she and Ted had ever slept together after we had gotten back together.
She told me, that they havent. Candie said that Ted does stay over sometimes, when she has a night class. So i asked her if she is dating anyone. She said no. Turns out that she is in love with my husband. Shes not afraid to tell me that, because she knows that i cant do anything to her. She said that i dont deserve a guy as good as Ted for what i did to him. She said that sooner or later, Ted would realize this and leave me for her and his son.
At this point my hate was fuming over... I couldnt help myself. I punched her. she grabbed her face, and i realized i actually hit someone. I scrambled out of Panera Bread, and made myself scarce.
About an hour ago Ted texted me, asking wtf did i do. was i wrong?
|
Met babysmom for lunch. she said to much. and i punched her in the face, in the middle of Panera bread.
|
t3_33dw96
|
relationship_advice
|
[21/M] vs [20/F] Is this flirting? Or a red flag?
|
I met this really cool girl on OKC. We share a lot of common interests and we just seem to match very well. She claims she doesn't have a phone for the moment so she told me to add her on FB. So we start to chat.. a lot, which is nice. The only thing is this: She has already resorted to calling me pet names like "hun" and "cutie", called me a sexy know-it-all, and said she wanted to run her hand through my hair.
I actually have Asperger's so I'm not the best at picking up cues. Is this flirting or is it a red flag?
|
Is it too early to start using affectionate language?
|
t3_20qrcc
|
Dogtraining
|
With a puppy and a 1-year-old dog, my girlfriend and I are at odds..
|
A little backstory - as mentioned in the title, my girlfriend and I have two dogs, a female one-year-old mutt (Lana, terrier mixed with a yellow lab, maybe?) and a female 9-week-old Shar Pei/black lab mix (Quinn). They both seem to greatly enjoy playing with each other in the two weeks since we've gotten the puppy. Our older dog is very full of energy and will occasionally bowl over or step on the puppy when both run to greet someone at the door, chase a toy, etc.
The conflict between my girlfriend and I comes when she insists that I discipline Lana for doing this. In my view, saying "no" or "bad dog" in that moment will only confuse her. She doesn't know that she's accidentally stepping on or kicking the puppy, she's just being a dog; however, I recognize that I'm not a professional animal trainer and that my interpretation of how a dog sees the world is often wrong.
|
Should I discipline my dog when she unintentionally steps on/body checks our new puppy?
|
t3_251k8s
|
dating_advice
|
What to do in this case? (29M)
|
Hello dating_advice.
I'm looking for advice on what to do in this situation. A while ago I met this cute girl on Tinder, and we hit it off. We're both 29. We talked for a bit and then we moved to BBM. There I asked her out on a date, she said absolutely. The day we were supposed to go out, she messaged me and said she will be late at work so we should postpone it a few hours, I was ok with that. Time came, she messaged me again saying she won't be able to make it still, apologized, felt bad she said, said how much she was looking forward to it etc... I told her it's ok we can always reschedule, but I'll be leaving town tomorrow for the next 3 or so days.
After I came back we talked again, told her what about that date now? She said she would love to, then she found out I've never been to a certain event that she's a huge fan of, so she wants to take me there and we will have a great time. Then she asks me to call her in a bit if I can. I do so around 15 min later, we talk for a while then she gets another call. I hear her say something along the lines of her forgetting to call them back, asks me if she can call me back on this number and that was it.
That was the last time I heard from her, it's been 3 days and I haven't even attempted to contact her. Usually in this case I completely ignore and move on, but is that really the right thing to do? I never wanna seem desparate so I usually just get over it and move on. I also understand fishing and fake accounts and all that, hence why I've been pushing to meet up.
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Met a girl online, we talked for a while. Asked her out on a date and she agreed. Then bailed. Brought it up after returning to town, she said yes and even planned an event. Then after a phone call she vanished. Wat do?
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t3_q7qoj
|
AskReddit
|
Budding programmer needing some advice.
|
I'm about done with the school system. Not "finished", but just done. I'm almost done with my second year of university (Applied CS major), and I don't know how much longer I can stick with it. I had problems with school my entire life and always got bad grades. I never clicked with it. I wasn't trying to be a rebel or anything, I just couldn't ever convince my brain to make it a priority.
Work is the other way around. I have a part-time job (very few hours), and I love being there. I love feeling productive, like I'm contributing to something and getting compensated for it, feeling like part of a machine. I have no trouble applying myself towards work -- it doesn't completely drain my motivation, energy, and emotions like school has after 16 years.
I have a real knack for programming. It's one of the few things I have a talent for. I've always picked up on logic and problem solving, and working on code brings me back to my exploration of logic puzzles and games when I was a child. I pick up on programming principles and techniques faster than any other subject, and I thoroughly enjoy myself even in seemingly mundane tasks. Nothing feels better than working on a structure for a few hours, having it fail, and figuring out the problem. It's like vicodin to me.
What are my options? I know I can stick with school. I know that's what I should do. And I'll try. But I'm having so much trouble with it that not exploring other options at this point seems foolish. Exactly what skills do I need to learn to be hirable? Once I learn these skills, how can I become certified and get the credentials I need on my resume? What sacrifices would I be making by not getting my degree?
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School isn't going too well and I need more options. What are the steps I need to take to be hirable if I can't get my degree?
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t3_1xs2sw
|
relationships
|
Silence - rough patch or more?
|
F (26) dating M (26) for a year and a half. Everything has been great until two weeks ago. We had a minor disagreement about a misunderstanding and I thought we resolved it.
Since then communication has decreased and is only initiated by me and he is very reluctant to show affection and in some cases finds it hard to converse. This has come out of the blue really as the disagreement was minor.
He has labelled it a rough patch and swears we are fin but I feel like a burden and he is seeminly shutting down. I am not sure it is fine. I have triend talking it through with him and he says he will try harder but do actions speak louder than words?
|
Communication and affection stops out of the blue - have tried to resolve but cannot see any change. What now?
|
t3_33cbz2
|
askwomenadvice
|
Ladies, is it my own fault? I (M, +30 years old) haven't had a relationship with a woman or sex m entire life!
|
Here is the thing: I'm now in the biblical age of +30. Since my puberty , when my interest in girls started, I haven't had one intimate relationship or sex.
I was not very good interacting or entertaining girls back then. I always felt kind of insecure, because as soon as I approached new people, I was often ridiculed or asked out of curiosity about my short shortsightedness and my thick glasses that I have to wear. That made me feel like I'm not quiet right, not normal and somehow defective.
So I rather avoided approaching people on my own, specifically girls. This pattern is still alive, even though the women in my age group now are more mature and usually don't confront me in such a openly disrespectful and curious manner about my eye problems, as the teenage girls did back then. Of course they might have similar thoughts on their mind, but just don't speak them out loudly.
So the dilemma right now is that I'm kind of stuck, socially-isolated and I often feel like an outcast - when I see other people having partnerships and talking about their sexual encounters. To make matters worse: I'm still a student and most of my fellow students are in their early twenties (so at the height of their sexual activity and attractiveness). Being around women in their early twenties and overhearing them talking about their sexual encounters doesn't make me feel more confident as a +30 year old with no experience at all.
Even with my age "advance" of almost ten years, I still feel kind of insecure (not as much as during my puberty) and awkward when it comes to interacting with my female co-students. Usually I tend to be the more passive party in the interaction with women that I like.
That leads to a pattern of secretly falling in love with women occasionally, without doing the right steps in her direction and communicating it to her. As you might imagine, none of these "falling in loves" has led to a relationship, but to a lot of bitterness.
What would you recommend me to do from your perspective?
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Not having had a relationship due to early rejections - pattern continues.
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t3_3ck5ca
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relationships
|
Me [30 M] with my wife [22 F] (2 years) she's thinks I'm ugly and hates her life with me
|
I've been married to my wife for almost 2 years. We argue all the time and she has called me ugly twice (both times said she only said it to hurt me and didn't mean it.) I've said things like I hate her but never insulted her appearance.
Anyway we have a 1 year old and another baby on the way but she is depressed and has expressed that she hates her life with me. We always make up after considering divorce, but she goes back to hating me I think. I just don't know hwhat to do- I love her and want to be there for her and the upcoming baby of course but I really don't think she loves me. Any words of advice at all would be appreciated greatly.
|
Wife hates her life with me but we always decide against divorce. Is this marriage doomed?
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t3_2o4hkh
|
relationships
|
I [21 F] have a boyfriend [54M] with a 24 year old daughter and she has no idea how old I am yet.
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We have been together for a year now. Things are as good as they can get besides this one obstacle. We don't get to spend as much time together because his daughter [24] lives with him at the moment until she moves out in a month and he hasn't yet told her that his girlfriend is younger than her. She is aware that her father is seeing someone seriously but is unaware of why he is keeping me hidden. He has told his son about me and my age and he had no issues with it. During the summer we got away with it more because he has a boat and we were able to stay there 4 days out of the week. With winter approaching it is getting harder to spend time with him and I am tired of missing him most of the week to be quite honest. I'm wondering how I should go about dealing with this big elephant in the room. It seems like something neither of us want to bring up but I'm curious as to whether or not he ever plans to tell her about me or if he just wants to keep me hidden from her forever. I understand it being an uncomfortable situation for her but I am truly head over heels in love with her dad and I hope that she will understand our happiness together. Am I being too pushy in asking him what he plans on doing? Should I just let things continue going as they are and let things fall into place naturally?
|
my boyfriends daughter doesnt know her father's girlfriend is younger than her
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t3_3f3709
|
relationships
|
Me [21F] with my BF [23M] of 7 months, doesn't initiate anything sexual with me? Is it normal?
|
We have been together for almost a year and at the beginning things were great with us. He would initiate it all the time. Now that time has gone by, we figured out its really difficult for me to orgasm. He used to get frustrated and i would try to help by telling him I need more foreplay and what not. Now its like i have to jump on top of him to in order for him to have sex with me and that just doesn't feel right. He doesn't even make out with me at all anymore and when i talk to him about that he said he's never really liked kissing. It's super frustrating as a girl because i love being intimate but he seems fine without it now. Do you think its because most times I cant orgasm? Everything else in our relationship is great... I just really want to know what's going on with him.
|
BF doesn't initiate anything sexual with me anymore
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t3_2n5yzi
|
relationships
|
Me [18 M] with my gf [17 F] have been dating for a little over a month, I'm confused reddit. How do you tell the difference between "liking" someone and loving someone. When is to soon to say I love you?
|
Before dating, we spoke frequently (nearly daily) for two months until I asked her to be my girlfriend. I have feelings for this girl, but to be really honest with you guys I don't know how to tell what love is and what liking someone is.
It feels like a month is a short time. But I can't deny that she makes me feel something no one else ever has.
It almost slipped from my mouth today and I don't know if I really mean it or if I am mistaking something else for love.
Help would be appreciated :)
|
Don't know whether I love my gf or like her lots.
|
t3_kvamd
|
AskReddit
|
Hey, Reddit. I just won a slap bet, which means I'm entitled to slap my friend at any time, and I need help with ideas!
|
To be clear, it's a slap in the face, not anywhere else, and I can do it any time, any place. I don't want to shame him completely, because I think that will get him to seek revenge on me in other ways. I need an effective, hilarious way to slap him, such that even he has to laugh at the scenario.
One idea I had was to record the slap at different angles to get his reaction completely. Another was to go in a public place and scream, "This is what you get for cheating on me!" and slap him.
Anyone have any ideas? Also, I can slap him twice, since he lost two slap bets.
|
I need creative ways to slap my friend once or twice.
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t3_3097g8
|
relationship_advice
|
My ex best friend/ crush got a friend with benefit...
|
So some background knowledge, this girl (i'm a guy btw) was my best friend last year and we had a massive fight that resulted in us trying to avoid each other. Whilst in the middle of the fight i started to become interested in her as i was missing her presence so much. Eventually we made up and now we're like two people starting a new friendship. I started to talk to her again and i was being more flirtatious as our relationship grew once again. We both made it quite clear in the past that we probably wouldn't ever have feelings for each other (which i completely fucked up) but nevertheless she was enjoying my flirtatious side anyway. So fast forward about a month, i've been flirtin' my ass off with her and talking to her every other day until earlier today she texts me that she has a friends with benefits (cue dramatic heartbreak music). So being the fuckup that i am, i went all stupid and just told her that i had grown feelings for her. She responded quite well and said that was cool and all but she didn't feel the same because of all our history. I could probably go into more detail but i'm not sober enough to, so i'll try explain any questions that come up. I told her i still want to go on a date with her and she said ok, but reluctantly with the fear of leading me on. I thought what the hell, i still like her so what's the worst that can happen? anyway question is what the fuck do i do now?
|
ex best friend/crush has a friend with benefit, my heart is broken, i still like her, and i'm drinking the pain away.
|
t3_3s6omx
|
relationships
|
Boyfriend (20s/M) and I (20s/F) are from different cultures. It is affecting our relationship.
|
I met my boyfriend online. We are together for close to a year and I will be moving to his country in the upcoming weeks, to study.
**About me:** (in my 20s) From a collectivist culture. Selfless, generous, helping. Trustworthy, so no secrets. No "none of your business" other than very private things like sexuality. I grew up in this, I am happy about it. My ultimate life goal is to provide a good life for my family, mostly my mother, also make her proud.
**About boyfriend:** (in his 20s) Boyfriend is from an individualist culture. He is independent, free, he is really a nice person. But has the "none of your business" attitude about some stuff, that I never experienced before, but I respect him for it. He was pushed to be an individual, and his life goal is to be the best in his career.
We have a lot of issues, like money. What I grow up with is, that things like money is non-private if you are living together with that person. You know how much they have saved up and such. He recently got some good amount of money (thousands of dollars), but he does not want to tell me. I respect for what it is, but because of how I grew up, not only the way he presents it is insulting, but I also see it as a bit of personal attack (he says he does not want me to know so I don't want any of it and such, which to begin with, I wouldn't ask any). I know I will probably get downvoted and get some insults coming my way since Reddit and especially this subreddit is mostly from individualist mindset, but I just want people to realize that is my way of thinking among maybe billions of people.
I just feel hurt by his "none of your business" attitude from time to time. Whatever I earn, I tell him, out of respect that we will be sharing a house very soon.
I know I will be told "you are wrong, convert to individualism or die" but I just want to know how to get over cultural differences?
|
Boyfriend and me from different cultures, and our way of thinking is clashing.
|
t3_1vw0pk
|
relationships
|
Why would you see an ex on a weekly basis and tell them you love and miss them, but not ask/try to get back together?
|
He (24m) ended our 5.5 year relationship a little over 2 months ago, but is now texting me almost daily, we see each other at least once a week, hangout and occationally sleep together or just have a sleep over. He tells me he loves and misses me when we are cuddling in bed together. I am planning on asking him what we are doing, but for right now- why would anyone do this? I am doing it because I want things to work between us. That being said his reasoning for breaking up was that he didn't think he could make a commitment in his mid-twenties and didn't want to be "married" now (we were living together for a year). Originally I (24f) had told him that we couldn't have any contact, but it has been proven to be too difficult for both of us.
|
My ex texts me all the time and we still see each other, sleep together and he tells me he loves and miss me- but hasn't said he wants to get back together, WHY.. is this all just some mind game and so that I don't move on?!
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t3_3td3hm
|
offmychest
|
My mom is having an affair and my dad smokes cigarettes.
|
First my mom. She left on a walk today with my Dad, and I went on her iPad and onto her Gmail. She had several email conversations with the subject as the 'kiss emoji.' She is talking sexually with a large political figure and if any of their conversations were released, his career would be over. She meets up with him after school (she is a teacher) and make out, to the extent of my knowledge. (Email had phrases like bring your lips). I am the only one that knows besides them of course.
~~ ~~
Now my Dad. Not nearly as bad but I saw him a week or two ago go behind our garage and smoke rose from behind our garage. After he left I went back there and smelled cigarettes.
~~ ~~
I plan to go to church and talk to a priest about it (Im Catholic), but until that is available, what should I do?
|
What should I do in this situation?
|
t3_1iqund
|
relationships
|
I think a girl(F/19-20?) I work with likes me(M/22). What should I do?
|
I started working at a catering company in December of last year. It's a part time job so they only call me whenever they have events. About three or four months ago I met a woman who also worked there. A week after that, her daughter and a friend came to work with the company too. I try to be friendly to most people so I introduced myself to them but didn't really have much of a conversation. A couple of weeks go by and we see each other at some of the events but we don't really talk since I'm a runner (refilling buffets/replenishing plates etc) so I'm constantly running around.
The woman's daughter was really nice but I didn't think anything of it. Then about a month and a half ago the girl's mom starts telling me that her daughter is single. I kind of laughed it off because I didn't think the girl would like me. I hadn't been called back to work until today where I saw the girl again since she missed the last event. She was more quiet this time and I saw her looking at me a couple of times. My cousin (who also works there) kept mentioning my name to her and she would get really embarrassed. Finally when we signed out and were about to go home, all of us walked towards the parking lot. I parked on the level below everyone else so as I split up to take the stairs, I said to everyone, "Alright I'll see you guys later." Everyone said bye except for the woman's daughter who said bye + my name. Then as I was walking towards my car I heard someone call my name and the woman's daughter saying "No! No!" but also laughing at the same time. Kind of like they were teasing her. Maybe they were teasing her because her mom thought she would like me but she actually doesn't? I don't know.
What I do know is that a lot of people get into really awkward situations by dating someone at work. If you guys or girls could help me out that would be awesome.
|
A girl I work with might like me and I don't know what to do.
|
t3_33b8dv
|
tifu
|
TIFU by seeing my own mistakes
|
So not a fuck up from today but over a period of time.
Last weekend my SO came at my place and told me we need to talk, I knew where this was going she had been given hints in her texting and body language. I said i'm not ready to give up something that she did not expect me to do since I've been hard on her in the past.
Now thanks to having a lot of time and thinking i've seen where i went wrong and what i did wrong . I'm basicly affraid of commitment and anything that comes together with it. Like when she said she wanted children i said i won't and that i hoped if she was pregnant she'd let it been taken care of, or that i solemly wanted to buy a house on my own not together with her, and a multiple series of these things. Now i've seen that i do want kids with her, buy a house, get married,... I had put up an enourmous big wall around myself due to insecurities and former relationships that i just said the opposite of what i wanted. So now i saw the light we are still on a break but i have seen her sunday and told her about it. She would not believe me znd i cant blame her fornmonths i've been saying the opposites to every thing she wanted with me and to come closer to me. And now i fucked up i feel that we wont come back together she still loves me but she's not sure if she can find the energie to work for the relationship.
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insecure guy so almost dumps me see she's the love of my life blast trough my wall with tnt see where i was wrong now i probably lost ly SO
|
t3_3i112d
|
relationships
|
Neighbors(40s?) too loud, singing creepy rituals outdoors all the time .
|
So I live in what is a usually peaceful neighborhood, but we have new neighbors that do some pretty weird, (and loud) stuff.
They get together every week or so with about 20 people and start performing singing rituals and stuff(outdoors). This, although what they say is unsettling(calling spirits), is their right, and I respect that . But it's really starting to be a huge annoyance.
For example, I was chilling to a cold one with my gramps out on the patio , having a good time and they decide to start doing their stuff. I cooked some ribs out on the grill last week, my wife and I had some friends over, and they decide to start doing their thing. Is this grounds for a noise complaint?
|
neighbors are super loud and annoying
|
t3_2x4s44
|
relationships
|
[29M] with [30F] sweet, cute, got-her-stuff-together, new dating prospect. Issue: Minimal to zero mutual hobbies or cultural interests. What do?
|
Hello reddit,
I am a single 29M freshly into a "new" dating market thanks to a move back to my hometown (large midwestern city). I met a very nice 30F about two weeks ago and have gone out with her twice for 2-3 drinks over 2-3 hours. We have pontificated about life, school experiences, work experiences, our families, and so on. It's all very preliminary but we set up plans to see each other again and have little text conversations once or twice a day. In short, it's brand new and low pressure/no commitment but looking like good mutual interest.
The Catch: As far as I can tell we almost have no points of mutual hobby or cultural interest. I have your classic nerd loves (star wars, hobbits, gaming, etc), follow baseball and hockey, read a lot in a lot of different genres, keep up with the film world and what I consider high quality hbo/amc TV, and so on.
She is with me on casual sports fandom - I'm sure we would have fun at a game - but that is about it. We also of course have almost no similar music taste.
And yet, I like this girl. I feel dumb for being skittish about a relationship prospect because we don't have a common frame of pop culture reference, or because I think we're rarely going to want to go to the same movies or concerts. On the other hand, I'm trying to figure out what our best case scenario is going to be in terms of time spent together. So far I've got sex, happy hour, and home games at the ballpark. While all of these things are very nice, they can't be the sum total of what we do together.
I have had 3 girlfriends before of greater significance than mere flings, and all of them have had large overlapping areas of hobby/culture interest with me, so I'm sort of out of my element here.
|
how do you have a relationship if you like each other but have none of the same hobbies and like none of the same shows, movies, music, or books
|
t3_2jxix7
|
tifu
|
TIFU Cleaning the car
|
This happened a couple of weeks ago. I drive an old Suzuki Swift, probably once a week so I rarely think about cleaning it. It had been a year since it had a good clean out so I mustered up the motivation to clean it, interior and exterior. I drive to a car wash and felt as though the air on wasn't performing well so I let down the windows very slightly. Fast forward to when I rock into the carwash. I get the high pressure hose out to do a quick spray of of the dirt and then get the foaming brush and go around the car. After 15 minutes of spraying my car I realise that the windows were about 3 cm ajar. Needless to say the interior got a good wash as well.
|
Went to wash car and left windows slightly open. Very wet wow.
|
t3_2wrr3e
|
relationships
|
5'F dating 6'2M. Feeling like a kidnap victim.
|
We are 24, and 22 respectively. I am the older one. We've gone back and forth in dating probably beginning around two years ago. We get along great but there always seems to be a snag, usually on my end. One thing that has always bothered me though, is our mismatched heights.
He is 6'2 while i stand at 5' even. Were just in the beginning stages of that sort of awkwardness. Things are fine when we are sitting next to each other, or laying down, but when we stand up it just feels wrong. We ran to the store last night and it just felt impossible to maneuver for me. I couldn't sneak a kiss or whisper to him about the weird hat lady in front of me. He just felt a world away despite being next to me, his head is just so far away from mine. When he would go to put his arms around me it just felt like he was attempting to steal me. It just feels like we dont match up but i like him and im trying not to get hung up on this. I dont mind having to stand on my tip toes to kiss him sometimes but i dont want to live my whole life like that, its not even possible.
|
he is a great guy i always want to try with, but his length makes me uncomfortable
|
t3_tcbv0
|
relationships
|
My bf [M, 25] of 8 months hasn't said I love you (I'm F24)
|
I told him that I loved him the other night; I'm used to waiting for the guy to say it first, but 8 months is starting to be way too long to me. He responded that he's not ready yet and needs more time. Another thing is that he's moving away in three weeks to another country for a year, and we haven't decided on what to do about us.
I'm glad he was honest and didn't say it back if he didn't feel it. He acts like he cares about me, and actions speak louder than words. But this whole experience has left me vulnerable and insecure. This is my first long serious relationship, and the first time I've been bursting to say these words to a guy and mean it.
My friends say that he's trying not to hurt me because he's leaving so soon, but I'm already hurt. My friends also say that I owe it to myself and to him to see this relationship to its natural end. But I don't know about that. 8 months is a long time, and I don't see how anything will change in the next few weeks. I'm going to be so sad if we're together all this time, only to find out at the very end that he never loved me all this time (which at this rate, is probably how things will end). If we're going to break up, I almost want to do it now, although I'm not 100% decided on this...other part of me does want to do as my friends suggest and make the most out of these last few days. If we're going to stay together, I need some sort of reassurance before he goes that he can at least verbalize how he feels about me before I'm willing to give it a shot.
|
BF hasn't said ILU after 8 months, and he's moving out of the country in 3 weeks.
|
t3_4273ur
|
loseit
|
Struggling with stubborn two pounds
|
Hey Lose it,
First off I'm 22f, hw:171, cw163, gw140.
Just last week i was 161.8, and over the week gained a few pounds. School is getting busier and busier so i only have time for 3 hours at the gym a week.
For the last month I have been hovering between 163 and 161. I just want to get below 160, but I can't seem to break the number.
I have just started endurance running and am using the slow build up thing where you walk/run/walk. I'm at 3 minutes now, which feels amazing. However, I have just been hungrier and hungrier and am hungry even when I space out my meals and hit my calorie goal for the day.
Basically I have two problems: I'm always hungry now and want to eat more food than previously, and I don't have time for 5 days a week of gymning.
I could really use advice from anyone who has overcome this stage in their weight loss journey, and can recommend affordable filling foods.
|
Not enough gym time, and too many calories. Help!
|
t3_1fo3d8
|
AskReddit
|
Do you think the ailments Americans suffer are caused by our food process? What does the rest of the world think?
|
I was diagnosed with a kidney disease last year in Afghanistan. I was medevaced back to the US to receive care.
My diet is a very delicate balance & I'm a big foodie. I craved things constantly I couldn't have. I decided to teach myself, watch YouTube channels, cooking channel, food network, it became a passion.
I love cooking & entertaining now, but back to the question. I noticed that a lot of Americans get their food from highly preserved & processed sources. My brother told me how he and his family usually eat out or get fast food on a regular basis and it made me cringe. I prefer it all fresh & natural and I notice an amazing difference, especially with the balance I need to maintain.
So what are the thoughts of those in America as well as those across the pond in how we approach food.
|
Food habits of Americans vs overseas and health impacts
|
t3_3v0pie
|
relationships
|
Me [22/F] with my BF [23/M] 9 months, should I just tell him I love him?
|
I [F23] have been my boyfriend [M23] for over 9 months now. Things are going well, and he has recently invited me over for the holidays.
At the beginning of relationship he told me he has never told any of his exs he loved them. The only time he felt like he loved a girl was after they broke up from a 5 month relationship. He has warned me it may take a long time for him to say it, because he wants to be sure.
I'm not trying to put a timeline on it but it's been 9 months... I have been sure I love him for awhile now. While, he constantly assures me that he likes me and feels that I have been the best girlfriend for him, I don't feel that he loves me. I feel really discouraged and anxious. I feel like at this point I should just tell him how I feel... At the same time, he is the type to feel pressured. I don't want him to say it back and for it to be disingenuous?
I feel like by 9 months, you either know it or you don't? It's not a deal breaker to me if he doesn't say it back immediately, I don't know how long I should wait before giving up.
|
Been dating my boyfriend for 9 months, yet to exchange I love you. Should I just say it? How long is waiting for too long?
|
t3_4f48m6
|
relationships
|
My [26 F] petsitter/sister [27 F] shaved my dog without my permission.
|
Jasper is my rescued wolf/husky/malamute mix. He doesn't have much wolf in him, so he's a great companion but those who are familiar with wolfdogs will know that they are easily stressed. As a result, I hire petsitters to watch him when I go away instead of kenneling him.
He LOVES my sister. So when I made it known I was going away for a couple of days, she volunteered to watch him for me. I agreed since she is responsible with her own dogs and it would save him some stress (and save me some money!)...
So, Jasper still has some of his winter coat, but it sheds naturally and leaves him with a short summer coat. It's a natural process, and after having him for 5 years I would have expected my sister would realize this. Unfortunately, when I got home, he had been shaved. She had done it herself with a pair of clippers for men.
You are really not supposed to shave a dog with a coat like his because there's a chance the coat will not come back properly. He also looks absolutely ridiculous, like a thin greyhound with a giant fluffy head. It's horrible. People who already know him and know what he used to look like are laughing at him on walks and asking me why on Earth I would do this to him. To make matters even worse she texted me this afternoon and asked me to reimburse her for the clippers because the store wouldn't take them back in used condition. She said I should do that since a professional shave costs $60, and the clippers were $20, so I saved $40.
I have not told her how upset I am. She claims she shaved him because he was "hot." He lives inside with central air!
I feel like I'm going to literally scream. I have not seen her since I got home - she was not there to greet me. I did respond to her a little bit this morning and didn't bring up the shave job. I have not responded since she asked me to pay her for the clippers.
How can I talk to her about this while saving our relationship?
|
Sister shaved my dog without permission and I'm enraged.
|
t3_1aydew
|
relationships
|
25M confused about 21F
|
So I've been kind of seeing a girl since October. She knew I liked her but she never told me she liked me back. She left for a job cross country a couple months ago. While away, she told me she liked me and she'd like to have a relationship with me when she returns, in about 6 months. She's currently only able to talk on weekends, since her workweek is rough. Weekends are the only time she can take care of any personal business, laundry etc.
Lately we've been talking less and less, and every time we get some phone time, I get really nervous and barely speak out of fear of making an ass out of myself. Sometimes I just force things to talk about, which makes me feel weird. She tells me about all the stuff that she doesn't like about out there, and I can't be anything else but apologetic and supportive, I need to think of ways of keeping our conversations at least a bit interesting.
Anywho, lately we've been talking less. I understand she's got things to do, but sometimes I feel like she just doesn't want to talk to me. We have some of the same friends, and I know her sister, and sometimes she doesn't even text me, but she'll talk to everyone else. It makes me feel a little sad knowing that I seem to be the only person she doesn't bother to make time to talk to, even though she says she really likes me. She even sent my 4 year old son a very expensive present, and people tell me that if a girl likes your child that isn't hers, it's a very good sign, but I just can't help but to feel like there's something going on.
Please help me understand what's going on, this girl is incredibly amazing and very beautiful, and it would suck to lose someone like her without ever getting to hold her in my arms.
|
been seeing a girl for a few months, told her I liked her, didn't tell me she liked me until she was very far away. Says she likes me a lot and even likes my son, but we barely talk, and sometimes I feel like she doesn't make an effort to talk to me, even though she talks to a bunch of other people
|
t3_ej4fm
|
jobs
|
Any job suggestions?
|
I'm graduating in August with a double major in history and political science. I was pretty sure I wanted to be a history teacher, but my constitutional law professor keeps wanting me to go to law school. I know I don't want to do THAT, but I am good at those sorts of things. It got me thinking that maybe I can pick a career that's a little more ambitious, anyway.
I know I love to work with people, and I love history. I do well with academia, but I don't have any special desire to end up there. I want to avoid the need for an immediate master's degree. For example, I planned on being a teacher and then eventually getting a degree in education administration. Being a teacher required some certification, but the point was that I could get in my field and save up some cash before I go back to school again.
And just for the record, I'm not hating on teaching. I'm sure I would like being a teacher. I just thought maybe my love of history, politics, and teaching might lead to more than just one place. People always pretend like there's only five kinds of jobs in the world or something. x_x
|
Graduating with degrees in history and political science. What jobs can I get aside from your standard high school teacher?
|
t3_1jw0wi
|
relationships
|
Me[21M] with my ex-gf [21F] Ex girlfriend might be about to get cheated on.
|
I'm not sure what subreddit this should go in because it's only kind of relationship advice I guess. If this isn't the right place, I can take it down and post it somewhere more suitable.
So, I was dating a girl for a year and a half and then she broke up with me for what seemed like another guy. Not a big deal, the relationship was starting to crumble due to emotional issues and stress due to finals and such.
So, Carly and her new boyfriend James have been dating since shortly after her and I broke up in January. Carly went to Amsterdam for part of the summer and then to her hometown three states away for the rest of it while James is in our uni's town, and I know it really stressed our relationship last summer.
I heard through my really good friend James asked someone I know on a date.
Should I tell Carly about it? We're on speaking terms and there's not really any hard feelings, but we don't really talk often because she's not in the state. Should I wait to see if James and my friend go on a date first? Or should I just not get involved at all and maybe somehow let her know through indirect means?
Thank you for any advice that's given.
|
Ex's new boyfriend asked another girl out on a date
|
t3_4kt7am
|
dating_advice
|
What am I doing wrong (F, 28)?
|
Hi reddit people! I thought asking your advice would have been a good idea as I am a bit lost.
I'm a 28 year old girl. I'm very independent, I work, I have a lot of hobbies and loads of friends. According to the people who know me, I'm nice to talk to and fun. I am average looking, nothing amazing and nothing too bad (I think...) and I don't usually have problems attracting guys.
Now, I've been on a couple of long relationships in my life, last one was seven years long and I ended it two years ago for a lot of personal issues that I won't be able to explain here. However, since then, it's been pretty much a disaster. I've dated, and dated, and dated a lot of guys and they all seem the same. They are happy to spend some time with me and definitely happy to be my friends with benefits but no one wants to really get involved. We go out on a few dates and then everything ends abruptly. I've been ghosted and treated like shit for no reason - people close to me know the whole stories and they all agree I haven't done anything wrong. I'm not clingy, I'm respectful, despite my insecurities I try and take things slowly.
This whole dating mess reflects on me really badly, I get hurt every single time. I can't help but thinking that it's my fault, and I've done something wrong. Plus now, after a few bad experiences, I start feeling I'm kind of "cursed" and if someone asks me out I get extremely nervous, which is so not me. I really don't know what to do to break this pattern. Am I giving too much too early, should I tell the guys I go out with that I don't want "casual" fun, what should I do?
|
My dating life is a mess and all the guys I go out with disappear after a few dates. What am I doing wrong?
|
t3_4f0v4w
|
relationships
|
Is it creepy I (21/F) sniffed my crush's (34/F) cardigan she left on a desk at work?
|
I am a 21 year old female and I am in love with my 34 year old female coworker/supervisor. I work in a warehouse.
She left her cardigan that she had been wearing earlier in the day on a desk that I was working at.
I looked around to make sure no one was looking and then kind of leaned over and pretend to get something off the floor and buried my face in the cardigan and sniffed while i was doing it. Then I did it a second time a few minutes later. It smelled exactly like her and my heart was pounding so fast after I did it.
Is this creepy or not too bad a thing to do?
I am fairly certain no body saw me do it. I have been in love with her for two years.
She is also in a relationship with a man who works with us also but there have been signs she likes me too. Im in love with her
|
Is it creepy I smelled my coworkers clothes at work
|
t3_1k7hlo
|
legaladvice
|
[UK] I don't think I've passed my 2nd year at Uni. Contract for new flat says I must be a student to live there, but I don't think I will be...does this negate it?
|
I have just finished my second year at university in another city, and I have some exams this week I need to pass in order to pass the year and progress on to my third and final year. Due to various unforseen circumstances this year I don't think I'm going to have even a slight chance of passing one of these exams, and will therefore fail my second year.
If I do fail the exams this week I can resit them in January, but doing so will require me to postpone my third year until September of next year. Due to this, I won't be needing to move back to the city my university is in next month, as I'll have no reason to be there.
I have signed a contract on a flat to live in from Sept 2013-Aug 2014, but I obviously don't need it if I don't need to be in that city. The contract says
> "IT IS HEREBY AGREED AND DECLARED as follows:
The Tenant is pursuing or intends within three months to pursue a course of study at an education
institution."
Will I still count as pursuing a course of study if I'm basically having a year out, but still technically a student there as I'll be going back next September (hopefully)? If I don't count as a student, is this an out for the contract, and if so will there be repercussions? If I do, am I just going to have to move into the flat anyway and try and get a job for the next year to pay for it? (I won't get the student loans if I'm not at uni for the year).
Sorry this was a bit all over the place.
|
Don't think I've made it into my next year of uni, can I get out of the contract on my flat?
|
t3_zc3zh
|
relationships
|
Am I[19M] crazy for still wanting to try with her[18F]
|
So after 3 months of love together and her begging me crying not to end it because of school (would become long distance and I get paranoid and depressed) she breaks it off, goes on a drunk bender, fucks 4 different people within the week, and tells me she has been crying from missing me almost every night and still loves me, Its been about a week since I last saw her in person still skyping, and I don't know what to do because I still love her too, and I feel like I shouldn't, she says she wants to still want to have something, I just don't connect with almost anyone, and she was/is my closest friend, of which I have very few, and I just feel torn to both ends of love/hate right now, should I give it a go or just try to make breaking up as painless as I can?
|
I love a girl I feel like I should hate
|
t3_34pa7b
|
askwomenadvice
|
I [F26] don't know how to deal with my workplace bully [F23].
|
About a year ago a girl that I work with tried to have me fired from my job. On paper this girl ought to be my best friend, and I thought we would socialise outside of work; but she made it clear very quickly that she didn't like me, she wouldn't say hello to me and would only give 1 word when I asked her questions or tried to get to know her. I love to bake, but she won't ever eat anything that I bring in, and she will make a point about how good other colleagues baking is. Everyone else would tell me how nice she is, and I would often see her talking in a very animated manner to others.
Things got worse a year ago when she tried, and nearly succeeded in having me fired. I had a video on my phone (not rude, violent, explicit etc) but of something that I shouldn't. she saw me show it to our manager who thought it was funny. Instead of talking to me and telling me I should probably deleted it, that afternoon she went straight above our line management to the Head of Operations. I had hearings and meetings and I, and most likely she, was expecting me to lose my job.
For the last year I have kept my face and not let on that I know what she did to me and I still manage to say hello to her but it leaves me physically shaking. I'm incredibly insecure and fake my confidence completely and I hate that she has made me feel like this.
I have never confronted her about it, or told her that I know it was her. My boyfriend has told me that she is jealous of me, well there's nothing about me to be jealous of and that doesn't help me deal with how this has left me feeling. I really don't know how to move forward from this situation.
|
a girl at work tried to get me fired and has gone out of her way to make me feel shit about myself.
|
t3_4a786v
|
relationships
|
Me [18 M] with my friends sister [17 F] why is she taking care of me.
|
So my friends sister has always had a crush on me and I'll admit I've found her attractive.
She's always thought about me when she's went out from getting me gift to food as well. I've never acted on it out of respect for my friend because he's very protective of her ever since their dad died.
Recently I got bad food poisoning \allergies and have been vomiting a lot. She texted and asked if I was okay and I told her about how I was feeling. As soon as I sent that text she said she was on her way.
It's been 2 days and I'm starting to feel better and can hold down solids. But it's made me pop the question of why has she been taking care of me? I tried to tell her I was fine but she wouldn't take no for an answer.
She cancelled on her friends on Friday because she was with me but I never asked her too. She has made me soup and stuff and has gone to the store to but me medicine.
I tried asking her why and all she said was it was because she was worried about me.
Question's:
Why would she take care of me for no reason?
Should I do something for her to show her I appreciate her taking care of me?
If so what should I do for her?
|
wondering why my friends sister took care of me when I was sick?
|
t3_1rk3cz
|
relationships
|
I[19/m] need help cutting it off with my lady-friend [22/f] of about 2 months
|
So a few months ago i met this really awesome girl and we have a great time and we seem to hit it off and everything. Before i met her, I was kinda lonely and I wasntt a fan of the dance-around dating game type thing. So, s things go on, she starts to like me more and more and though i was stricken with her at first it didnt really grow at all.
a week or so passes and on a skype call, she asked me to be her boyfriend. i didnt know what to say. so i told her that im not ready yet and for her to be patient. I mean, thats understandable we'd only even known about each others existence for like two weeks or so and she understood that i needed time. But she kept bothering me about it, saying how much she wants me to come back to visit and how much she wanted me to be her boyfriend, and i was growing weary of her but i was still smitten so I went over again and asked her out. HOURS after i asked her out i had an epiphany that this wasn't right so i broke it up through a bunch of tears on both our parts and told her i needed more time, and we kept the relationship going.
Fast forward a couple weeks to now and ive learned that she is clingy and high-maintenace, which isn't any fault of hers thats just the way she is but i dont even have the time for that sort of relationship if i wanted it. and im not technically her boyfriend now, but i really need to cut things off completely with this girl. I work/go to school/ hang out with friends every night and i dont have the time for the constant texts or skype calls everynight, and i was wondering if you had any tips on how to severe ties with someone?
I know its only been two months but shes clingy and i have a hard time with this stuff
|
met a clingy girl, now i need help to get rid of her
|
t3_23jogh
|
Advice
|
Online harassment advice
|
This has been going on for over a year now and it's reached ridiculous levels.
Story goes like this: About a year and a quarter ago, I joined a gaming community, all was well. I ended up doing well, got on with the owner, ended up in a position of responsibility and all was well. Over time, the community decided they didn't like me and started causing trouble with me, eventually leading to attacks regarding my personal life and clearly making me emotionally uncomfortable. After it got too much, I left and went about my own life and tried to seperate myself as far as possible from them. Apart from a few little things, it eventually faded off, for the most part.
Then, today, they decided to come and bother me again. This consisted of joining my Teamspeak server (which, admittedly, is public, and I like it being public so people can join easily). Fortunately with a heads-up from a friend in the community, I was able to make my channel private. Following on from the previous episodes with them, me and the 5 friends I was talking/gaming with just decided to ignore them.
In the mean time, they constantly poked, whispered, and otherwise tried to cause a nuisance, including using photoshopped pictures of me for no other reason than to annoy and belittle me. We knew full well if we engaged them, the situation would get worse and they'd just keep coming back.
Now, I'm tempted to let them slide, but if they do come back again, despite the fact we gave them no attention, I'm not eager to put up with it again. I could just change my Teamspeak IP, but they've found my Facebook again and are bothering me through Steam.
So, I'm here asking for advice, **what should I do?**
My initial reading suggests I need to clearly, evidently, and through recordings tell them basically to leave me alone, call it quits and be done with. From then on, I'm in the right to persue stopping them by contacting their ISPs or the police.
Has anyone got some input? I really don't want this hassle, I just want to be able to get on with my own life without a load of immature idiots constantly bothering me and dragging me down.
|
Idiots I fell out with still bothering me a year and a quarter later, don't want to just keep letting it slide, what are my options?
|
t3_2kdek4
|
personalfinance
|
Interest only mortgage for soon to be graduating professionals?
|
Ok so, quick key bits of info on us. Me, 23 pediatric LVN (full time pay potential $35-40K) Wife, 27 homemaker/CNA (FTPP $13-15K) Son, 2.
My grandmother left me the money from her home in the estate which will settle in the next few weeks for $30-40K. We lived with my grandmother until she passed suddenly, and with both my wife and I starting undergraduate in speech pathology we decided to move closer to the school 2 hours away. Now the town we moved to has an ordinance that requires 2 rooms for 3 people. So we ended up in a decent place for $1029/month rent (utilities not included).
We really feel like we are throwing our money awat renting and want to start a life in a home, and we think we can with the money from the estate as a cushion during college. I've been looking into interest only loans (if anyone would even do one) because while our income would be very random/limited during the main parts of school each year or so would see a dramatic rise in potential income for us. Ex: 1.5 Years, Me BS (SLPa FTPP $40-60K), + 3.5 years Me MS (SLP FTPP $70-100K). Wife 2 years BS (SLPa FTPP $40-60K)
We want to use a community bank, maybe an FHA loan? We really don't even know how realistic this is.
|
Our combined potential income will increase from 50K/yr to 100K+ in less then 5 years. Plus we have 40K inheritance. (Also for last 3.5 years of me in graduate school I wouldn't be able to work much at all.)
|
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