question
stringlengths 3
9.81k
| answer
stringlengths 0
32.7k
|
|---|---|
I know life has been hard for all of us here and can make us feel hopeless with our current situations, but I was just wondering if any of you here have a favorite song that you would love to share with someone? IRL interactions can be stressful, but I think we all wish we could connect with other people, so I'd like to take the opportunity to reach out to you all and discover some new music! It can be any artist, genre, or mood that you want, don't hold back!nnEdit: I wish I could respond to all of your suggestions, but it's a little late where I'm at. I found a lot of amazing music and I absolutely plan on listening to the rest of your suggestions! I hope you all can find something new that you like here, too, and I hope you all have a very happy rest of your day/night! Also, if you were wondering, my favorite song right now is Baby, We're Ascending by HAAi.nnEdit 2: You are all amazing. Thank you so much for taking the time to open your hearts up and share your love of music with me and everyone here!
|
Hi
|
Soo I have thought about joining a gym since a long time now probably 2 3 years almost. But every time I think about it I suddenly feel anxious about joining one and thus I just postpone it but Its been the same since 2 3 years and idk I just have zero idea about workouts, diets, etc and am also not that great to make a friend and idk rn i feel like my unhealthiest self and I kinda want to join a gym but i am just to nervous about it.
|
I have a similar anxiety about joining a gym! But I managed to conquer it before (even if just for a little while). I made sure to put together a little work out plan before going (just on my notes app on my phone, using workouts I'd seen in YouTube videos or online etc) to get me started. That way when I got to the gym I wasn't standing around awkwardly without a plan. I personally find it easier to deal with gym anxiety if I try to go tunnel vision. Focus on my workout and only my work out, dont stop and look around, just focus on the movements and reps so that I can be in and out of there ASAP. I also would try my best to go to the gym at quieter times, so that I'd feel less intimidated by the amount of people and wouldn't need to wait for equipment. Oftentimes people are focusing on themselves in the gym, but even if someone looks at you - try to pay no mind because this is your time to focus on you and not what others may think! It also helps to have a goal in mind you want to achieve from going to the gym. You need to want to achieve this goal so much, that it deters you from skipping the gym due to anxiety. You'll have your off days for sure, but do keep trying! I'm rooting for you OP! :)
|
My mental illness always makes me the toxic asshole. Years upon years of professional help. Nothing has worked. nnIf I wasn't scared of death I'd be gone. And I would be doing everything a favor.
|
Everyone's an asshole lol. People have their own way of being dicks to each other. I'm not sure what mental illness you have, but I'm sure the people who care most about you, understand for the most part. No one truly will understand what you're going through, besides you. nnCan you maybe try a different way of thinking? Like looking at a situation from the other persons point of view? Like REALLY from their point of view. Like thinking about how their whole day began and how it led up to that current point where you want to be an asshole to them. That's honestly what helps me be a decent person throughout the day.
|
for the past few years, i've been working in the restaurant industry (host) because i thought it would be good exposure therapy. i still dread going into work everyday due to the fact that there's so much social interaction. i don't know if i should keep trying to push myself or if i should just accept the fact i'm never gonna be good with people and find a job that's less customer service based. my sa hasn't gotten better or worse while working with people but i'm so sick of being so drained all the time bc of my job
|
If it were me, I would start looking to work somewhere else, (or a different position at the same place if that's possible). I don't think you should give up on improving your social anxiety. But I don't think a job is worth it if your constantly anxious about it. Improving your social anxiety won't make you an extravert all of the sudden. I don't see any shame in getting a job that has less social interaction. In fact, most jobs, especially part time entry level jobs, require some interaction. So there is still an opportunity for some exposure therapy. Just less intense.
|
I was in the hospital a couple months ago, almost died but that was nothing compared to asking to use the bathroom there. Plus I was being given iv fluids so I had to use the bathroom even more often. Actually hell. I would spend like 2 hours holding it in thinking of the perfect time to ask.
|
Damn dude. Getting all those fluids id be running like hell to the bathroom but on a unrelated note I hate using public restroom that have two urinals next to each other...scratch that I hate using public bathrooms periodt.
|
Or at the very least not have any effect on anxiety.nnA lot of sources say coffee is not good for anxiety, but I'm just wondering who on here are the exceptions to the rule. Personally I drink coffee just like soda, it tastes good but it has very little anxiety-related effect on me.
|
It also maybe the sugar (if you use it), because I read somewhere, that it may rise mood.nnBut in general I think, because by drinking tea, you distance yourself from all problems for that moment.
|
I think i've seen posts similar on here. I'm a 21 year old female at college. I've had pretty bad social anxiety my entire life. In elementary school i barely had friends, in middle school and high school I made a suprising amount of friends, and in college i've made no friends. I'm a junior now and I live with 2 roommates who were my friends in high school. I have like 4 ( 2 I see constantly, the others not so much) close friends. I'm very grateful for them.nnRecently, i've noticed I have a hard time being happy for other people's accomplishments. Especially social accomplishments. My roommate joined the soccer team and made friends. I of course ACTED happy for her but inside I was just envious, angry, and sad. When my other roommate talks about making small talk with people at the gym or meeting someone new friends (this happens a ton as she's very social), I don't feel happy for her. I feel upset because I want it so desperatley. It isn't that I dont want them to be happy and have friends, it's that I want to be able to experience that joy too. And if I don't get to have it, why do they? It's awful. It's crazy how this illness can turn you into such a miserable person. I feel really ashamed about these feelings. I love my friends and I wish I was secure enough in myself to be happy for them.
|
Think that although it is important to have friends or/ and family, I think we are lonely all our life and our most faithful partnership is nobody else than ourselves. Although I also get really attached to people I love but I learnt best way to keep relationships is giving space and boundaries. Then, if a relationship will last or not, only time will tells.
|
My psychiatric clinic has made a referral for me to get the treatment. A bit scared and sceptical it'll make a difference. Anyone here with experience? Did you notice any difference in your mood and energy?
|
Not sure how to answer that; I guess my condition has been steadily declining and adjustments (mainly increases) of my medication hasn't helped. That's pretty much the reason they've given me, as they don't think I'm well enough to even get therapy due to my lack of energy.
|
Anyone else use a mask to feel better? Like wearing it in public makes me feel safer and makes things easier.
|
Yea last year but now I can't stand wearing them
|
i cant belive i havent made any friends in all of highschool so far. ive been so scared to. im almost half way done and i havent made a single close friend this entire time. i used to have a fuck ton of friends in middle school but covid, i lost them all. now im just an anxious wreck that cant talk to anyone new. I honestly dont really know how to make friends anymore. Isnt highschool supposed to be the time in your life where youre super social with a lot of friends? I feel like im wasting my highschool experience. Almost 16 and i havent had a single close friend since 14
|
I only have people who display basic politeness in high school; I've never had a close friend in my entire 18 years of existence, and I feel lonely and disregarded by everyone else. Except for me, everyone has someone to talk to. Everyone is so self-centered; no hellos, no pleasantries; they only talk to me when they need something from me, and I'm weary of thinking that if I help them, they'll be friendly. People took advantage of my vulnerability.
|
I find that with a lot of people with social anxiety a common issue is a lack of eye contact but I'm the complete opposite. I'm always living in a state of being hyper aware-of what's going on around me because I'm so anxious socially that I'm completely disassociated. So when I'm talking to someone Im riddled with anxiety and trying to appear as normal as I can I end up giving them really intense eye contact. I'm afraid it's like I'm almost staring at them? I can tell it makes people uncomfortable because while they're talking to me they frequently look away and a little bit of me dies inside. it's driving me crazy, I'm just trying to be present enough to actually listen and try to think of something to say but instead I give off weird vibes. Ugh how do people give normal non intense eye contact
|
This is 100% me. It makes me feel as though I'm on a different
|
I know texting isn't something you shouldn't do. But Its a former co worker who I haven't seen in over a year. But have contact (instagram and snapchat but not her number). And what if it's the only way I can reach them? What is a good conversation starter? Also if I were to call. Should I let them know via text before doing so? Or should I just text?nWhat if I do ask her if she would like to meet up for coffee or lunch and she thinks it's not a date and just meeting up as friends? What do I do?nIf she were to say yes. Should I say “then it's a date”?nnHow would I make it so she knows I'm asking her out on a date?nYes we've chatted via text bit it was more of catch-up than anything. Though I was iffy on weather I should. In the end I didnt.nnWhat if she sees this as abrupt? (Also what if she's busy and can't call right now or prefers to text because she doesn't see a need to call) what do I say?nnThe problem is that I can't date right now due to omnicron though it's been rapidly dropping. But should I plan a date for like one or two weeks ahead?
|
When exactly should I ask her?nnAnd should I say “hi nShe says hi and say how are you nnThen I ask how her week is going.nnnAt one point do I ask
|
People who have had bad physical symptoms like shaking,dry voice,walking awkwardly,stiffness,poor or no eye contact etc. nHow did you do it?
|
The best way I can say to help this is to get as much exposure as you can. Try to force yourself to interact with others more. Also, remind yourself that your symptoms and feelings during interactions are perfectly normal, and that you will be ok. Take some deep breaths, and acknowledge what you are feeling, but try not to dwell on it. It might help to let the other person know that you are having some anxiety. They may even reassure you that you will be ok. What about interacting with others gives you anxiety (the silence, eye contact, saying the wrong thing, etc.)?
|
I want to play among us with strangers (through discord). All I have to do is press one single button to be put into a lobby. My social anxiety is not letting me do this. nnI've been staring at all the invites passing by, u201creadyu201d to join one. Yet I just can't do it. Absolutely nothing bad is going to happen if I do, but I just can't do it.nnI know I can join and stay silent. I know I can leave if the people are toxic. I know people don't care about what I do. I know joining will help my anxiety. Yet I still can't press the u201cjoin callu201d button.nnI u201cyoloedu201d it once. As soon as I pressed join, I went and pressed the leave button. nnI don't know what to do. How can I fight this anxiety and press that one fucking join button?
|
I had a thought... have you tried talking in the social anxiety discord? Since everyone in there has that in common it may be an easier place to start. You may even be able to find others in there who would be interested in playing Among Us.
|
I've begun taking 50mg Sertraline tablets and I am one week in. I took half pills all week. Today was first whole one.nnI understand it is normal for symptoms to get worse before improving so I've basically been curled up on my bed with my teeth clenched all week not talking to anyone.nnI had a drink tonight even though alcohol I know makes this worse. I find that I do lots of things that don't help. I am getting in my own way of living a healthier more fulfilling life. I find it near impossible to have fun and relax. I'm either serious and doing something because it's productive or I'm down/anxious.nnAnyway just sharing because I feel low. S/o is gone on a trip since yesterday until next Monday so it's just me and my cat.nnFind it hard to reach out to friends when I feel like this.
|
You got this.
|
Just cancelled an interview for a help desk position because I can't bear to be on the phone for most of the day and took a lower-paying job to work remotely/not in a customer service-oriented field. Is anyone else the same? Next time I will try to do the interview for practice. I beat myself up about it so much this week.
|
Don't worry, you are not alone. Not too long ago, I cancelled a customer service job because I was too afraid to do the job interview although I would have probably gotten the position. Ever since I don't apply for customer service jobs anymore because I really hate making phone calls or answering customers. nSocial anxiety sucks.
|
I'm a (21F,) I'm a full time real estate agent, but I decided I want to go back to college to pursue nursing. Well, all my life I've had a terrible phobia of public speaking. I faint, puke, cry, and run out of rooms. Well I realized for my core classes to transfer to any university that I need to take Speech, and English Composition. I just can't do that, I just can't put myself through that. I faint when I have to get up in front of a classroom. It's not good for my mental health either. I've been diagnosed with Bi Polar type 1, Borderline Personality Disorder, and anxiety. I'm on meds to stabilize my mood. It will never get better, I would have to take nerve pills to even be able to get up to speak. I really want to be an RN, I work wonderful one on one with people, I'm very passionate, and caring. It breaks my heart that it comes down to this. I don't think it's fair that colleges do this to people with glossophobia. I believe I can take speech 100% online. I'm feeling so hopeless….
|
I did this when I took a public speaking class except reversed! I have good eyesight so I went out and bought unneeded glasses that blurred my vision so that I couldn't clearly see my classmates' faces when I spoke, lol. They were a godsend
|
Hello im struggeling with several trust issues relating to relationships and i dont know how to get on the right track but ill give some backstory as its needed for context purposes but here i go:nnSo a few years ago i got into a relationship with someone and at the time i thought they were the one but things quickly dove and then we split and i found someone new and i fell in love again and things werent always great but i tried to trust this person but eventually i found out the truth and i had been catfished badly and after that i broke into a pretty bad depression as i suffer anxiety autism and deppression irl but i ended up getting back with my ex wich was a really bad decision as i would know cause it went south again and i was left on my own again but i ended up opening up to this one person who helped me feel better and i soon fell in love again but i kept it hidden as i was afraid what would happen if i confessed but i eventually ended up confessing and everything went well and we eventually get together but if any coinsidents happen my mind makes me instantly jump to ‘'shes cheating on me isnt she?'' Or something like that nnAnd i dont know what to do anymore
|
Thank you for sharing, bets wishes.
|
So I usually talk to my friend about annoying situations I get in and she thinks, from what I've told her, I might have social anxiety. I have no way to know for sure but this is the best way I can get something close. nnI had told her about something that happened in Art class recently. We were doing this project for art and we had one week. We only had 3 days in class tho so we had to start it at school or we'd have nothing to work on at home. We weren't allowed to do it at our separate tables so we all had to work at one. On the day we started the project, I couldn't bring myself to even get up and go do it. So when I want home I had nothing to work on. I only started the day before it was due. A week long project. And even on that day it took me 20 mins to get myself up and over to the table. I felt really stupid.nnThats one of the stories I told her that she said makes her think I have it. There was also this time I walked out of History class the day we were presenting projects and just cried in the hallway. It was mostly bc this girl was being rlly hard on me recently but also bc public speaking is terrifying. I was just really scared and I couldn't rlly breathe bc of all the crying.nnI personally don't think I have it, or at least I don't think it's bad, but I was wondering what others think. nnIs anyone willing to tell me what they think?
|
Social Anxiety is mainly about our fears of being judged by other people. Everyone has this fear but it can be mild for some and severe for others. If the fear makes you socially avoidant to the point that it negatively effects your life and limits your day-to-day activities then it becomes a problem that requires therapy like Cognitive Behaviour Therapy and/or Exposure Therapy.
|
ERROR: type should be string, got " https://nationalsocialanxietycenter.com/liebowitz-sa-scale/nn(Apparently, the maximum value is 144. )nn(https://www.reddit.com/poll/vzw8dw) " |
95, insert _guess I'll die_ meme.
|
Does anyone else feel anxiety or stress even when looking a close family member in the eyes (when talking for example) ?
|
Yes, but rarely.
|
Why are you afraid of people? Why do you feel like you deserve being judged? Why do you think you don't deserve to be treated with human decency?nnI'm trying to work this through at therapy but I'm at a halting point. I've no idea why I think so little of myself that I've come to _accept_ that I'm not worth enough to be respected and not judged 24/7.nnI wanted to gather my thoughts by asking around and would love to hear all of you out regarding this.nnEdit: This got a lot more comments than I expected and I feel too overwhelmed to reply to some of y'all even though I rlly want to. You're heard. You're seen. You're valid and you deserve respect. If anyone needs to vent about anything, I'm available in PM's. Can't promise advice, but I can just be there and listen :)
|
Oh my god. I've been apart of this sub reddit for months now and you are the only one that has the same issues to me but some slight differences. Like my dad used to confine me to my room and ignore me for days sometimes weeks just for a bad grade and it really affected me as now I only remember negative from my childhood and my parents almost always shutting me down (mostly my dad) even if it was just showing them something as simple as a drawing. They would say that's not nice or do better. And I think it affected me to the point that I became this recluse that sits in my room all day just thinking that nobody will every think I'm good enough with a SAD and borderline agoraphobia. I just wanted to ask if you've found a way to cope with it or any practises that you are doing to help you heal?
|
So throughout this year (freshman year of college) I thought I had befriended my roommate and some other people on the hall. We all started to hang out, but I noticed that I kinda drifted apart from them. They would leave me out of stuff, like going places and group texts and things like that. I kinda started getting the vibe that they didn't like me, but I wasn't sure, as I still would hang out with them daily. nnHowever, earlier today I accidentally came across some texts between my roommate and another one of our friends that basically proved that my group of friends (or at least those two) don't like me. I can't say I'm really angry or upset, I just kinda feel numb. nnSo here I am. I don't know what to do next. I don't know whether I should just go along with it or whether I should confront them. It is the end of the semester, and I'm going home in a few days, so I probably would confront them about it if I wasn't already sharing an apartment with three of them next year. Because of that apartment I don't really know what to do.nnTL;DR: started noticing my group of friends drifting away from me. Found some texts proving that they don't like me. Don't know what to do next.
|
I went back and read it again. I must admit that the way I worded it could come off as rather aggressive.
|
19 F btw)nThis is going to sound kinda awful ig but I've dealt with what I thought has been social anxiety my whole life. It started bad in school thru presentations but I've realized now I have progressed to be so bad that I've even lost a lot of interest literally hanging out with anyone, and feel as if I have no idea how to make any new friends. I used to be the super enthusiastic and happy u201ccrackheadu201d energy kinda friend that everyone wanted to be around. Now I feel drained and I overthink social situations so much it is honestly exhausting. It's why I don't want to do anything anymore. Every small thing someone does (that may be innocent ig) , I will overthink and twist in my head to make the person be against me, like I'm extremely over sensitive or smth. Its to the point where I'll be somewhere and genuinely don't know what to say In a situation/conversation. Like I freeze out of fear , or do I just not care? I honestly can't even tell. The most f'ed up part is after a lot of research I think I may have autism or aspergers. Social situations hav never been easy and I've always felt kinda u201cdifferentu201d compared to others. Honestly I just don't know tho. I'm wondering if anyone can possibly relate and lmk what they think of this?? It's honestly ruined my life so far cause naturally I want to be social so bad but I constantly am thinking of how I'm weird to literally EVERYONE 24/7 (seriously). I was diagnosed w anxiety and depression and have been taking medication lately. It helps a little but still socially I feel like I literally am so off. Also side note: I tried taking adderall in college and it made me much more confident and ready to be social. I read that adderall works for ppl with autism, so this Is why I'm wondering if I have it.
|
Thankyou , and yes exactly u hit that spot on. It's like maybe we're naturally extroverts so that's why we want to be social so bad? And the anxiety holds us back? Idk that's what I think sometimes, could be wrong tho. Anyway, I think adderall could be great if you can get it prescribed. Normally I don't think a doctor will do that bc it's meant more for just adhd. If you can somehow talk to your doctor alone (since you're 18) maybe that would work bc of your parents? I get anxiety even calling and doing things on my own lmao so maybe just wait til your next physical check up if you're the same & serious about trying it. Otherwise please don't buy it illegally like I used to. It wasn't smart of me tbh. I really hope you can feel better soon. just know you're a lot stronger than most ppl out there for dealing w this shit lol.
|
Ima just start by saying ever since this happened I've been avoiding everyone i know, locking myself in my house, and only coming out to bring in groceries I ordered for delivery from my local Walmart. It's been about 2 months since it happened and I haven't been able to face anyone I'm making this post in hopes someone will know how to help me with this weird anxiety that has honestly been crippling me.nnA friend I haven't seen since freshman year tracked me down over Facebook messenger and invited me to a party along with a lot of other people from my old High school. I was thinking it was gonna be a small get together between our old friend group. Party time rolls around and I pull up to my friends house surprise turns out it was almost half our graduating class like a reunion come early, FMLnn I go inside already nervous due to the fact the majority of these assholes treated me like shit for years, I ignore that majority of assholes so I can find my friend that invited me or my old friend group because he told me they'd be coming. I find my friend but not the others I ask where everyone is he says don't worry have a drink they said they're coming it's a party have a fun time. In my head I'm thinking fuck it I drove all the way here might as well.nn 2 hours go by and I'm getting hammered, playing beer pong, joking around with people that never even looked twice at me in High school I was honestly pleasantly surprised and enjoying myself. Now let me just say I'm not the best looking dude, average but not ugly atleast I've never thought I was and due to all the alcohol women were drinking I'm willing to bet beer goggles were working in my favor.nn In my drunken state I thought it would be a wonderful idea to try and flirt with a girl that basically refused to talk to me for 4 years straight and holy shit I thought the world was ending she hugged me and greeted me like an old friend I didn't even think she knew my name I was so happy for awhile and I hadn't felt like that in a really long time. It was really needed, I felt validated like I might actually have done something right with my life I decided to keep talking to her one thing led to another and she's leading me down into my friends basement bathroom.nn I didn't even hesitate when she closed the door behind her I kissed her pulling her body as close as I could to mine making her fall into the door from my weight, she's kissing me back and I'm elated. She starts snaking her hand down my pants and can definitely feel I'm ready to go she smiles at me and starts getting on her knees my pants fly down I'm beyond ready for this. I'm in her mouth loving every second of it I can't be sure how much time went by being drunk and basically in a state of bliss but it all ended as fast as it started the door bust open to someone I recognized but wasn't sure why then it hit me, fuck she has a boyfriend I've seen this dude on insta pictures of him with her a few years back I felt like shit I just helped her cheat on a dude and it's been a pretty long term relationship from what I can remember I'm a scum bag. nnA flash from a phone turns on and stays on, there are more people behind him videoing how they knew I'm not even sure, we locked eyes his gf still bobbing her head not caring that he was there I started drunkenly rambling about how sorry I am dude doesn't care he rushes me tackling me to the ground while his gf is still blowing me refusing to stop. He starts beating the shit out of me I can taste blood and I honestly felt like I deserved it. At some point I blacked out and woke up in the hospital not only was my cheek bone broken along with my nose but I had to get stitches in my dick from her teeth where he apparently kneed her in the back of the head while he was beating me half to death.nnlast i heard he was in prison and the girl blames me for everything, I'm currently hiding in my house because i don't know who has those videos I'm ashamed and embarrassed about what happened and I'm even more ashamed of the fact that if the girl wanted to pursue a relationship with me I'd probably say yes
|
I'm sorry all of that shit happened and you didn't deserve to get beaten up for that. nnnThe girlfriend made the decision to cheat on her partner and it's not your fault - sure after you may have realized that they could have been dating and it sucks but how are you to know if they were still dating after not seeing them for ages? nnnI find it weird how she continued to give you head when he was taking photos and videos. Of course idk the behind story but it seems like it was planned or she was being vengeful. If they were still dating and she did that and rubbed it in his face she was doing that with another dude - it's fishy imo. nnnObviously the dude is an asshole and probably was abusive but it's not your fault for what happened and I wouldn't feel to bad that she was dating someone and did that. She violated her relationship and he was a dumbass to blame you for his cheating girlfriend. nnnI'd recommend seeking some kind of therapy/counselling because that is horrible to go through and also consider charging them with taking videos without your consent. That's fucked up and if they send it to anyone or share it, that's leaking sex tapes without consent and you have a reason to charge them. IF you need help connectign to mental health services feel free to let me know your city if you're comfortable with that so I can help! I work in mental health and don't mind connecting poeple to services - especially men because you guys don't get the support you need especially when it comes to shit like this.
|
I can handle it if it's someone I know well, but when anyone I don't know fairly well touches me, I shut down. It's like alarms go off in my mind and I just want to get away. Last night, I was at a concert, having an awesome time (by myself) when some drunk chick fell on me. All that happened was she tumbled and her ass plopped on my foot. A couple other guys helped her up and sat her in a chair, then laughed about it. I had a hard time enjoying the last 5 songs played by the headlining band because a girl fell on me. It sounds ridiculous, but when my personal space gets breached, I feel violated. Are you other SAPs the same way or do I need to get over it? nnTl;dr: I shut down when a stranger touches me; drunk girl almost ruined a concert by falling on me.
|
Oh man, definitely. Don't feel bad about that. I used to really go nuts when people I didn't know touched me. I'm still super uncomfortable with it. A friend of a friend once came up behind me and tried to rub my shoulders and I whipped around and almost punched him in the face. I startle really easily because I tend to be lost in my own thoughts most of the time. I've had to force myself to have physical contact with other people over a long time - I still feel uncomfortable touching my parents at all. I have to tell my SO's friends that I do not like being touched - it's sort of embarrassing. nnThe only person I'm okay with hugging / touching are really close friends (known them for 6+ years) or significant others - because socially, I logically know these people are safe and are not attempting to foist their will / dominate me. nnThe pat on the back from bosses seems like a method of social assertion and I hate it. Handshakes are not okay.
|
I try to avoid neighbours as much as possible even if I seem rude. Does anyone else do this? And does anyone else avoid people in general and then worry if they have ro meet them in another social context and it will be awkward because you have avoided them this whole time
|
Yea all the time. The worst part is my next door neighbor is also my sister in law. I hate myself for it, but how hard it is to change my behavior. If I see her and her family outside, I try to stay inside. They probably think I'm a tremendous asshole and I wouldn't blame them at all. n I also never say “hi” to my other neighbors. Not even wave. I can guarantee you if you don't say hi to your neighbors, they think you're an asshole. I know this because i was visiting my dad and another neighbor was outside. My dad says “Man that guy never says hi. What an asshole.” It's funny because we have neighbors that just moved in 2 weeks ago and they are already having parties with other neighbors.
|
I don't know what to do,I am most of the time depressed,anxious and stressed,if I am not all I am at least one of them,literally all the time,can't sleep,eat or do anything at all properly,the nightmares don't come when I am sleeping,they come when I am trying to,there is nothing soothe the pain most of the time,so I kinda just try to understand it,like having a talk with a demon in hell because the torture became less painful and more boring and even though all the effects of all those things are still as bad as they have ever been if not worse and everyday is a day worse than the last because I find a new reason to commit suicide,but I can't because I am too anxious to do it,most of the time I am kind of just existing and this is getting annoying to people around me and the worst part is that I cannot muster the will to tell them what i feel and even if I did i don't even know how to explain,so i am just looking around my room all day wondering why the hell i haven't died yet,like for fucks sake I have lost my way,no talents,no motivation,nothing for my future and everyday I feel like a waste of everything that keeps me alive and I can't even try doing anything about it because if I ever try to force myself to do anything I will get enough willpower to kill myself,so it's either die I'm a way or another and I hate both so if anyone at all has any idea on how to deal with it in a better way I would be grateful for any advice and sorry if my English is not the best,haven't talked to anyone in a while,reddit is the best place I can think of to try and tell someone without anxiety almost killing me for trying
|
My therapist said it looks like it doesn't work,but there is a reason for what he asks me even if I can't see any improvement
|
I am an art student and these days a project has been eating my mind. So my friends and i were invited to a bday party. Although I wasn't in my best mood, I decided to force myself to go with them and have fun. Who knows maybe that would be the party i will always remember or i will meet new interesting people or i will just take the pressure off.nAs it turn out, I tried to make some small talk in the begining but i just didn't want to hear the answers or to think what to talk about. So while my friends were having fun, i just couldn't force myself to do the same. My friends tried to cheer me up and even other people tried to talk to me and i just couldn't give a funny or nice response. I just blocked myself. Couldn't enjoy it or try to force me to get out of my confort zone and talk to others. I just wanted to leave and cry.nNow i don't understand, was it my fold for not trying hard enough? Should I not go if i don't feel like it? (Naturally a more introverted, shy and anxious person) I feel so bad that my friends had to be preoccupied for me and not annoying the party with me (although I went to parties in the past and had fun)
|
It's alright. Sometimes we don't feel up for things but it's often hard to tell if you truly are just mentally drained or if it's anxiety preventing you from having fun. Sometimes you have to take the gamble and try socializing. In this case it sounds like you were already checked out mentally from the project and couldn't get into your groove for socializing. It happens. Just apologize and try again next time you are in an open head space
|
I'm 20(f) and I've been on prozac (20mg) for about a month now. I have pretty severe panick attacks along with anxiety and depression. Lately it feels like nothing will ever get better and that I'm just going to miss out on having that u201cregular fun 20 year old lifeu201d and it sucks :(. My triggers and unknown and these panick attacks hit me like a bus, they usually last all day sometimes even for more than a few days! I feel lost and I know that you also have to help yourself get better when it comes to meds because they don't do all the work! But I don't know what to do if I'm doing all I can and I just keep falling back down this dark hole :(. Feeling like I'm back at rock bottom tbh. Any kind words would be appreciated:))!
|
The only way to go from rock bottom is back up so thing can only get better
|
I feel alone and alienated from everyone. I cannot talk to anyone or even make an eye contact. I want to be alone but not lonely. In school also I dont have any friends, and from the 8th class I am feeling like I am invisible to the whole class as no one notices me. Most of the time I am in my room, overthinking. I want to enjoy my teenage years but my anxiety and depression is not letting me. I want to be like a normal teenager, who have friends, goes out on weekends with a bunch of friends and is most importantly happy, but I have non of that and seeing others going out with their friends makes me more depressed. This has also affected me in my academics. I think I need help.
|
Yaa I tried that but it doesnt help. I feel anxious when i get in a group of people of my age or any age. And I cannot talk to me parents about this as they think I'm too young for all this as I am only 15. It's quite depressing.
|
I've had excessive sweating of the underarms for over a year and it is the #1 reason behind my social anxiety. When do I sweat? Playing FPS games. When I'm driving. When I'm nervous. Especially, IN THE COLD.(counter-intuitive process to homeostasis) Sitting in class. I think the biggest reason why I sweat is... wondering if people will notice i'm sweating. God help me.
|
Beta blocker prescribed by psychiatrist helps a TON. Also, clinical strength deoderant (not prescription, but the 10 buck stuff). Doc also said they have creams/patches that you can put on specific trouble areas as needed, but the med/stronger deoderant did it for me. If you are a girl, carry a travel size deoderant in your purse and re-apply each time you use the bathroom. If you're a guy, maybe in your backpack? nnAlso, you may want to speak with an MD to make sure it isn't something besides (or in addition to) anxiety. Might be some easy medical fix. Hope this helps! :)
|
From the (http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/social-anxiety-disorder/DS00595/DSECTION=complications)nn>Left untreated, social anxiety disorder can be debilitating. Your anxieties may run your life. They can interfere with work, school, relationships or enjoyment of life. You may be considered an
|
Everything on this list besides substance abuse defines me. The thing is I feel like I don't wanna change. I feel if i become more social i'll just be pretending to be someone i'm not. I feel like I was born to be a loner.
|
I have talked to many therapists about my current situation, and none of them have been able to figure me out and help me. And I truly have no clue what to do.nnI have crippling social anxiety. I overthink social situations to the extreme. I regret most everything I say when talking to people, and I mull over it for ages. Yet I am also a singer and actor. I have less anxiety when performing in front of hundreds or people than when approaching someone backstage to talk. It's strange.nnMost adults say that I am wonderful to talk to, but it is the exact opposite with people around my age (18-20). I think this may be the case because I have a very mature and
|
Damn I'm getting old. Now middle aged and the elderly make me anxious, teens and kids I feel myself relax more. nnJust remember nobody's judging you but yourself
|
Please leave comments about your experiences, whatever you choose, good luck and thanks. nn(https://www.reddit.com/poll/zkbue9)
|
When I was doing it myself, I didn't know that's what I was doing. I was more focused on trying to widen my comfort zone without planning long or short term goals.nnWith a therapist we looked at what I wanted and made a plan on trying to get there. Basically a lot more focused with a professional involved. It also has a lot easier bite-size goals rather than me biting off more than I can chew and just creating bad experiences.
|
how do i stop this i just try to remember everything i said and think that everyone hates me so much
|
There's a great quote that I like to remember when I start doing this that seems to help “You'll worry less about what people think about you when you realize how seldom they do.” Basically people are too busy caring about what themselves and really don't remember the small things you did or how you said something or how you stood . You know all those things that's SA makes you think everyone is fixated on , for me it's breathing and I often think everyone's thinking about how loudly I'm breathing but in reality I'm sure people are probably too busy thinking about what they're having for tea or where's x to care about what I'm doing
|
I'm 20 and suffer from depression and social anxiety. I can't study, think critically or focus and I start losing all motivation to even try to. I have very strong issues with my concentration and memory at the moment.nnI'm inarticulate when I used to be well spoken.nnI don't have opinions on certain topics. I canu2018t find anything to talk about in conversations. I canu2018t follow conversations because I just canu2018t focus. nnFor the same reason I just canu2018t focus in uni online classes. Iu2018m present all time but I donu2018t remember what the docent said two seconds ago and so after classes I leave without remembering anything from it. You can imagine how this makes university and life even harder for a person that already suffers from depression and social anxiety.nnOften I donu2018t remember what I read in books or texts, what happened in a movie I watched, what I talked about with someone, what I experienced last day/week/month and so on. nnI feel like I can't even think anymore... like my mind is empty. I feel like I don't know ANYTHING. It's like I forgot everything I've ever learned or experienced.nnI start to skip classes more often because of this adding up to my depression and social anxiety. Itu2018s just so incredibly hard focussing and understanding. nnMy brain turned completely empty, unable to function and dumb in the last time. It seems like I canu2018t access my head, thoughts or memories. I have no concentration and memory, I canu2018t learn new things anymore. I read things I'm interested in and and then I forget them. And seriously how could someone develop not being able to learn?nnIu2018m not sure if Iu2018m able to complete my last two semesters of my psychology bachelor being like this. Even if I would complete it, I donu2018t know in which job someone like me, a young man with depression, social anxiety and now also cognitive deficits, could work and get his job well done. Then how would I ever be able to socialize when now even my cognition lets me down. How would soneone like me ever be happy and confident? These thoughts worsen my depression but itu2018s so realistic when I stay like this, disabled.nnI think having depression and anxiety for many years is the cause of my cognitive deficiency. Does/did anyone here experience similar? How can I demolish those problems? They really took the last ability I had in life as depression and social anxiety took the others...
|
So SSRIs did help you or worsen it?
|
I don't know why I'm like this. I never used to be like this at all, until the last couple of years.nnWhen I talk to people of any race besides white, I get extremely fearful that they will think I am racist. This makes me nervous, which, in turn, makes me look racist, which makes me more nervous because I'm visibly shaking, which makes me look even more racist.nnI started working at a Mexican restaurant last year and it helped a lot, but only with Latino people. I walked to a gas station and hung out with the Indian attendant all the time, and he was awesome. My fear around Indian people has subsided. I know for a fact that he thought I was racist at first, though.nnIt drives me crazy. I delivered pizza a year and a half ago to a white man in his car. I didn't know where he was, so I asked the black man on his front porch where he was. He replied in AAVE, and I was so nervous that I accidentally replied back in AAVE and embarrassed myself so badly I wanted to die. I was mortified.nnI feel like such a horrible person. I hate to think that when I come across people of color, they see my reactions and they think I'm scared of them! I hate that I am just adding another day of what they view as racism to their lives. Things are already bad enough as it is and I hate to think I'm hurting anyone.nnPlease give me advice. Please be nice to me about it. I know how polarizing this topic can be.
|
OCD is definitely possible. I believe I may have OCD myself when it comes to intrusive thoughts. Intrusive thoughts can be a form of OCD. nnThe best thing that has worked for me when it comes to intrusive thoughts is to not take my thoughts so seriously. nnThis is going to sound horrible but sometimes I have intrusive thoughts that make me question my own sanity. For instance, if I see someone on a ladder, I get this random thought that what if I just kicked the ladder and they fell. I immediately feel like a psycho who needs to be locked away from humanity forever in a mental institution. And I get extreme remorse and beat myself up about it. But when I started responding by saying something like
|
nn(https://www.reddit.com/poll/mkmj1w)
|
i did, and failed miserably
|
I have many habits that don't really fit a specific mental disorder but are unhealthy regardless. To name a few:nSuicidal thoughts but only for a few months at a time, then I'm happy as anythingnI can barely talk infront of a lot of people and my heart starts racing at the thought of itnWhen I'm scared or nervous I dig my nails into my wrist or scratch at itnI weigh myself, a lot, and get annoyed if I gain weight. nnA lot of it can probably be put down to just teenage u201cangstu201d or whatever (I'm 14 years old) but I've started contemplating suicide again and just feeling really down and I can't really tell my parents or get any proper diagnosis or help unless there's some kind of way to see someone without them knowing but I doubt that. What can I do? I wish I could just see someone and get told whatever and then get help and just go back to normal but I can't so I'm stuck.
|
Not all depression is constant. In fact most people experience it as something that comes and goes to varying degrees. My depression is always there, but I don't really feel it strongly more than a couple of days a week. My husband has seasonal depression (the winter is a rough time for him, that only his obsession with football season seems to get him through.) n At times I have been tempted to question my anxiety and depression, because when I have days where I feel really good, part of me wonders if it was all some kind of dream. Then I get hit with it bad and spend all day wanting to lay down and hide from the world, while obsessively googling things I worry about.n This being temporary or a u201cphaseu201d does not make them less valid or less dangerous to your well being. Life is a temporary phase. Talk to a doctor/therapist if you are having a hard time. Family sometimes helps, but other times they have trouble taking your struggles seriously, and that is really not what you need right now.n Good luck, I know my mental health got much better after therapy and medication.
|
Hey everyone, this is my first post to this community. I'm a 22 year old female currently in my last semester at college. I have been dealing with social anxiety issues since I was a little kid (though never actually officially diagnosed with social anxiety) and I've always been shy and introverted. I have very few friends and I've always found it very hard to put myself out there and make friends. I remember being so anxious in grade school about my hair looking stupid that I always wore it up. I've always felt this need to hide myself because I never felt confident enough in who I was (and still don't, really).nAnd recently I've been going through ups and downs emotionally trying to deal with my issues and until pretty recently I thought I was starting to feel better. I really started having problems when I went away to college. I thought going to a new city 3 hours away from my home would be a good way to get a fresh start from high school. Part of me knew that high school for most people is definitely a confusing time but coupled with transferring schools at the end of my sophomore year of high school and already having trouble making friends it seemed to feel a lot harder than it should. nnSo, I thought I had made it out. And for a few months things were going alright. I was slowly making friends but then my roommate at the time broke up with a guy we were all friends with and I lost contact with him and the friends I had made through him. In retrospect I know that I pushed them away and I could have stayed friends with them but my m.o. is that as soon as I start to get close with someone I back off because I am so afraid of them knowing the real me and not liking me that I feel more comfortable breaking off all communication. So that put me into a spiral and I was having panic attacks, I couldn't sleep, I was crying all the time. I finally saw a counselor on my campus towards the end of my second semester and I was feeling better talking about my problems. However, I ultimately felt so overwhelmed that I transferred and I haven't spoken to any therapist or psychiatrist since. I was also really embarrassed that I had left my school and was so afraid of people asking me why I left. I told everyone it was a money issue (which was partially true). But still, since transferring 4 years ago I can't say that I have really made one friend at my school. I have tried to strike up a a handful of relationships but they always ending up going nowhere because I was too afraid of rejection. I lived in the dorms for 2 years even and I didn't make any real connections. nnThe one thing that is constant in my life though has been my sister and my boyfriend. Without them I don't really know what I would have but I'm at the point where I need to be able to do things on my own. I am graduating college and applying to grad programs soon. I am tired of being person every calls the
|
Being called quiet is probably one of the most annoying things when you're on the shyer side of things. Especially if you're dealing with social anxiety where you're always wondering how you're coming across. All that does is give you more things to think about and spend more time judging yourself than interacting.nnHonestly though, if anyone does say that, you just have to try and have enough confidence in yourself to not care what others think of you. I know that's easier said than done, but the only person you should really be seeking approval from is yourself. When you can start accomplishing that, life gets a lot more simple, because you're not caring about how you're coming across all the time and it helps a ton with anxiety.
|
Whenever I'm in a social setting and my anxiety starts to kick in, my neck, arms, and legs will become stiff and shake. With my arms and legs, my movements are rigid and it's hard to have a good posture. And with my neck, it shakes uncontrollably to the point that I have neck spasms and people will quickly turn away from me when this happens.nnI want to know if anyone else has problems similar to this and if there is any treatment for it? I really hate that I have to deal with this and it's causing me great distress. I want to appear normal in society, but it feels like that chance is robbed from me when I can't socialize correctly, yet alone control my body so people can approach me.nn----------------------nEdit: This was a pleasant and overwhelming surprise waking up to this much messages in my inbox. I didn't know a lot of people struggle with muscle stiffness or neck shakiness when their anxiety increases. This makes me feel a lot less lonely and crazy considering everyone in my life sees me as unhinged or mentally unwell. Thank you to everyone who responded! I appreciate it.
|
I think as you get more exposure to social situations, the shakiness becomes less prevalent. My level of anxiety and neck tremors 5 years ago compared to now is almost a night and day difference, since I was constantly interacting with people during college (which also drained me most of the day). But anytime it happens it sucks regardless because once people notice, it's like my only chance of giving a good impression is gone and I can't get that back.
|
Constantly scared to death to the point I'm paralyzed to move, speak, or even breathe loud enough for others to hear... I'm 33, kind of homeless.. having difficulties finding a psychiatrist and therapist.. I'm Bipolar 1 with massive constant anxiety.. heart is always over 100 beats per minute.. drenched in sweat always, especially my hands, feet and armpits... so scared to try again.. don't feel capable of anything that u201cnormalu201d people do constantly everyday.. hate myself, not giving up but this is horrible.. fuck these shaky sweaty hands.. the fear I am constantly feeling is like having a gun to your head kind of fear and it doesn't make any sense..
|
Hard to say then. Other than stress
|
Is it too late y'all? I feel like it'll be much harder now compared to when you were 20.
|
I finished a masters today and Im 31
|
My dad thinks that online school is bad and that I have to attend university. Truth is I get really anxious when I attend school - I have to work myself up for a couple of hours before I step out of the apartment that I have to live. nnI hate it there, I hate how cold it is and how uncomfortable it is. I hate that I don't have my mom. Sometimes I don't eat because I'm anxious to go outside and buy food. nnHe said he won't be paying for my university unless I attend it in person. But I love online classes and I only got 1 anxiety attack in a class where I had to participate. In the rest of the classes I can just listen and not worry about anything. All of my lectures are streamed and you can attend them either in person or online. nnAnd now I have to work which isn't so bad but I was starting to like university. I like to study on my own and have time to do other things. Fml.
|
you probably should attend university in person, It actually is not terrible, it's anxiety provoking yes but it gives me reason to leave the house.nnnhow can you expect to be in a competitive field if you cannot even make yourself go to college? you can't. nnI dread my classes in 1-2 years because i will have to do presentations and shit, but if i can't do that there's no way i will get a successful job. I have to face it
|
I'm going into these make a friend discord servers. Been in them about a year now yet not one long term friend made. So I decided instead of introducing myself over text, I join group calls where random people go to make friends. I keep joining these, yet I am unable to actually speak in them. Too scared. I only listen.
|
Look on the play store and search
|
I have two presentations to give at some point in the coming weeks, and I'm dreading it. I'm seriously thinking about just skipping them because the anxiety of even thinking about it is killing me. I can't sleep because of it, I always have this nervous feeling in the chest and I just want it to go away. Plus I already have a shit ton of other school work to do and I don't want to spend a single fucking second stumbling through words trying explain to some teacher about a project that i barely know anything about or even care enough for. Fuck presentations.
|
I wish presentations didn't even fucking exist tbh. Personally I find them pointless for the most part. Most people don't even care to watch the either, at least that's how it was when I was in high school. I've never had to give a solo presentation yet fortunately, but I've done group ones and I could barely do that without forgetting what to say and avoiding eye contact with everyone. I even developed bad sleeping habits weeks prior to any presentation which prevented me from sleeping or waking up 5-10 times a night with my heart beating really fast. I've even skipped school on the days I knew I had to present even though I got yelled at for it. Really hoping for the best for you.
|
this bothers me so much. Let's say i'm walking past someone on a street. i either look at the ground (sign of weakness) or stare at the other person (threatening or some sort of sexual tension) or stare directly in front of me (obvious to them i'm purposely ignoring them). i can feel so much tension whenever this happens. I don't want to be wearing sunglasses anytime this happens. i don't know where to look and it's giving me so much anxiety
|
what i wanna know is WHEN do you greet somebody you know if you happen to be walking towards each other
|
The constant anxiety is eating me up. I don't know what to do anymore. Therapy isn't helping, medication isn't helping, exposure therapy isn't helping. It's so hard to live like this. I can't even sleep because I am so scared of a social interaction this weekend. I was so excited for it months ago because it's a concert of an artist I love but I don't want to go anymore. I regret it. If it was only the ticket I would resell it but I already booked a hotel and a ticket for the train so I can't. I can't do this all anymore. It'll just keep getting worse even if this thing goes well.
|
It helps me cry it all out.nnDrained the next day but that 3rd day I feel like a champ
|
Basically, I used to get social anxiety even around friends and interacting with anyone other than family, unless I was super, super comfortable with them.nnBut now, I only get social anxiety at work. And I have no idea where it even comes from 99% of the time. It seems to be worst when I'm interacting with customers. It can vary from mild to severe, and I think I had a panic attack at work once or twice. Sometimes I feel like I can't make it through my work day, but every time I stick it out anyways and I do make it through the day.... be it through aids like fidget toys or work accommodations (taking short breaks from my register), or by taking up to three doses of hydroxyzine, or just toughing it out.nnRecently, I had some severe anxiety because I had a very irritable, very difficult supervisor. That's about the only time I've been able to identify a specific trigger. Thankfully, said supervisor quit because she didn't like her position.
|
Opposite - used to have primarily social anxiety, and now I have generalized.
|
Has anyone else experience this situation I'm 4 weeks in. I also have trouble eating at times. It feels like I'm short of breath but I'm not.
|
I am going through something similar currently. But mine is very hard to explain. It almost feels like somebody is squeezing my stomach or throat area but it's a weird sensation type feeling, and when I talk it just like a sudden rush sensation to my stomach. I can't even really explain it. It's so so weird. I can't eat hardly and have lost so much weight, and sometimes when I eat I feel like it's hard to breathe. Anyone else get these strange rush stomach feelings that you can't even really explain? I keep thinking it's not anxiety but I've had so many tests come back normal!ud83dude22
|
I always go and say something like
|
I don't think I used 'fillers' much but I learned a long time ago many people do use them, from life experience and some other medium I no longer recollect that painted them as 'fillers' because people don't like awkward silences etc. n nThing is I am mostly okay with awkward silences. I'll either speak or not and take as much time as I need to say something or not at all because I don't feel the 'need' many do to fill silence. By using uh, um, er etc you appear more normal than I do taking all the breaks I need/want to say exactly what I want to say, except for the times I trip over my words and stutter or say the wrong word.n nMore on fillers and the like:nnhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speech_disfluency
|
I think this is the right place to write this. nI'm 14 female and I may be just being a hypochondriac but I just wanna make sure. nnSome days I'll be sat alone and just get hit with the fast heartbeat you get when you're scared or anxious, but there's never any cause to it that I can really find. It lasts hours sometimes and I can't really explain it but you know when you have a feeling of dread that makes you feel unable to really move much not because you're incapable but because it's just hard to do anything more than trying to figure out if you're missing something?nOkay so while writing this I remembered an experience I had which was fairly similar with the panicky feeling so that may give an idea: basically I once effectively accidentally drunk 9 cups of coffee and had the same feeling except this time it's like randomly, sometimes in the afternoon, regardless of my caffeine intake. nBut as it's happening I'm constantly thinking like u201csomethings wrong, I'm forgetting something, etcu201d and it's so weird how come this is happening does anyone else have anything similar and sorry if I sound randomly or don't make sense.
|
I thought they tended to have a cause or can they just come randomly?
|
Hey, has anyone tried weed to counter the symptoms of social anxiety like people do with alcohol. And if yes, then does it help? Thanks.
|
It helps me tremendously
|
Should there be a dating application for Socially anxious people.nn(https://www.reddit.com/poll/pu60oe)
|
My ideal date/partner is someone who is far more socially competent than me tbh
|
Does it make a man weak to confess that they have social anxiety
|
Have I posted yet? I am drunk. No. It makes me feel weak to have PTSD from Iraq. I struggled hard with SA when I served. Don't worry about gender roles. Having SA isn't something you can control so you cannot expect to regardless of gender. I know the Same goes for me and my mental anguish from war
|
So at my age we can finally drink alcohol. Hurray. Alcohol has become the source of all fun anywhere: You can't enjoy going to a bar, club, or a party without alcohol. It's just not
|
Thanks for the website, looks really good!nnI always wanted to see a psychologist for this, but honestly I'm even anxious to go there. On top of that, near my parents I'm usually happy / semi confident, so telling them that I have social anxiety would be really hard. And I'm pretty sure it's not acknowledged here by a lot of people. Like if I tell them about my social anxiety and that I can barely talk to people without calculating and planning every sentence beforehand, they'll probably just say
|
i think I parked crooked asf too and I don't want them to put a face too the person who's always parking crooked (I stay in my lines) anddddd ITS HOT ASF nI've been in here for too long already and once I walk out they're gonna think I'm weird for sitting in a hot ass car nWHY WONT THEY GO INSIDE ALREADYnnUpdate: I'm inside now , I just said fuck it , plus I'm hungry
|
I understand the feeling. I had to pay the rent last week and waited about 10 - 20 minutes because I saw the neighbor talking to someone outside . It was bad enough my husband put it on me to go to the office to give them the check, but to maybe have to chit chat with the neighbor was too much to handle. I cleaned up a little to act like I was busy. I know my husband would think I'm weird for going out of my way to avoid someone. She is nice, but I'm afraid of doing something wrong, so it's easier to just avoid her.
|
There's a guy in my friend group that I know likes me and texted me if I wanted to hang out sometime and I don't like him like that at all. It makes me feel nauseous thinking about it and I just don't know what to say. It wouldn't make me feel comfortable hanging out with just him alone and I don't wanna be an asshole and hurt his feelings too bad.nHow should I respond to him?
|
“You seem like a really nice guy, I'm just not interested”
|
After 20 minutes of talking with someone, I always run out of things to say. A sort of wave of depression washes over me and I withdraw back into my shell. I'm also constantly analyzing how people react to what I say, like did I say the right thing? Comparing myself to my imagination of another one of their friends who they'd be joking and laughing with, therefore having a better time. How do people joke and riff off each other... I feel hollow/emotionless and minimal things make me laugh. People tell me just not to overthink it, but I've been stuck in this mindset for years. When I'm around social interaction, I go in a shell, and when I'm not I crave attention. Anyone else struggle similarly?
|
Just be attractive. Thats what we need to do and everyone will want to talk to us and things will develop naturally from there
|
I've spent a lot of time introspecting lately and I've identified two major problems. The first is my inability to do anything productive, fuelled by a lack of motivation. The second is my uncomfortability (read: terror) in social settings unless I am chemically intoxicated. The former I attribute to being depressed like many of us here so of course it is expected to view the world in a negative light and see things as an
|
I do the same things with silence. I can over speak and feel stupid after...and consequently beat myself up over it. Also, when I am
|
I got an image of me being injured or killed in an accident and then I looked up people who predicted their own deaths and I'm scared that's what I'm doing and I'm not ready to go I'm so scared to even walk down the street. I just want to live a normal life but I'm scared that by thinking of these things they'll happen to me.
|
So you would have around 7ish years of practice that's pretty long you might not be professional but I bet it looks really good
|
I've always struggled with general and social anxiety. nnAt age 4 I stopped talking to everyone except my parents and brother. My parents didn't want to take me to a doctor though, because they thought it would absolutely traumatize me if a doctor tried to force me to speak. By age 6 I could talk in school to teachers, but I still couldn't talk to my peers. It wasn't until 6th grade when I was 11 that I could finally talk with everyone (albeit very minimally). I later read about Selective Mutism and burst into tears because for once in my life I didn't feel so alone.nnI am 22 now. Over the last 11 years my social anxiety has remained. I barely have any friends, I can't meet new people, and my loneliness has spiraled me into a depression. I go through periods of feeling like I want to die. I've even started getting what I would call panic attacks. nnAbout a year ago I went to my doctor for chest pains, and he said everything looked ok but that its probably anxiety. He was very intuitive to the fact that I get very stressed out and prescribed me 10 Xanax pills, of which I have taken only 7 in the last 12 months. I wish I could have more, but I am too shy/scared/anxious to go back to the doctor.nnI would really like to schedule a full appointment with my doctor to really discuss my anxiety and depression before it gets out of hand. Its already out of hand. I really just want to die and hurt myself in the process. But I don't know how to talk to him. nnWhen the nurse comes in and asks
|
I had to do this two days ago. I actually printed out a sheet of paper with what I wanted to say so I would be able to get my point across easier and not forget something. I honestly felt horrible and really stupid about it until it was done and my doctor said he completely understood and told me we'd get through it together.
|
Haven't stepped out of the house since Covid 19 started and today got the news that uni lectures are starting offline from Monday. Idk how to prepare myself for the situation. I'm shaking and sweating since I learnt about the news, I'm very scared. I don't want to interact with people or professors but I've got no choice. Will appreciate some tips.
|
Oh, feels like I'm not alone.
|
I've been banned from two groups without any warning after apparently advertising products, I definitely wasn't, I saw other people share their logos that they designed so wanted to as well.nI messaged asking if I could be un-banned and they literally spoke to me like I wasn't human. nThey were groups I posted in regularly and wasn't all my karma from.nI also recently had a question about dog breeding and funnily enough another fellow dog breeder decided to patronise me with questions as if I didn't know what I was doing, Bare in mind I've rescued dogs my whole life and doing one litter, whereas she has been breeding miniature daschunds for 20 years?! nPeople are so assy on here I don't get it. Do I need to change?
|
> And really just don't give a fuck. People suck everywhere, that includes Reddit. nnI second this emotion!
|
I had a very hard time in my last 2 years of secondary school and had to go in for after hour classes because I was so nervous about talking to people and seeing them. I left this august and have been stuck in the house with an occasional weekend outing with friends/family. Now is the time to start thinking about further education or getting a job but I'm so anxious because I havent spoken to anyone I dont know in about a year except waiters and such. I dont know how to function or speak to people as an adult, or make friends. I'm 17 and I feel like such a failure because most of my friends have boyfriends and jobs and actually do stuff and I just sit in my room and read and play the computer and be lazy. Please give me some advice!
|
How about joining some place where people share your interest. Gym or language classes might be hard, but hey, it can be even some online group where people play games that you like.nnMy recovery started when I joined some online games communites. Then later a forum with people in same business, and it helped me a lot.
|
Ah even writing that title is crazyud83dude33 anyways I haven't left my house in 7 years, I feel like I should be insane by now but I amnt? I have extremely low self esteem & social anxiety of course, I am 24 now and really really want to live my life without fears & limits. I could go into more detail but basically my question is how I stay sane? Maybe I'm not sane& I just don't no it lol, seriously tho I feel very frustrated & stigmatised by my situation as in...How will I ever live a normal life after this? Who would love someone that spent their youth in their house? What is wrong with me? Is it possible to live a normal life after this? Thanks!
|
You have to start somewhere or it won't get better. Take baby steps. Your situation sounds extreme so I would take it very slow. Maybe just walk around the block a few times at first. When you feel comfortable enough with that go to a store or somewhere more public. You don't necessarily have to talk with people but it might prepare you for it if you choose to do so. Maybe chat with people online first. Text only if that's comfortable and then maybe mic chat. You have nothing to lose online. nnI used to be like you too until I came to the dire conclusion that if I was not proactive in changing my situation I would be alone forever. I still am alone but I have made tremendous progress over the last few years. Stay positive and good luck!
|
Hey, all. I really need some help. I suffer from pretty bad depression and social anxiety. I know many people have trouble working or getting a job, but instead of never having had a job, I've had plenty. Too many, actually. I graduated high school in 2011, and due to an extreme situation at home, I had to move out at 17. Even though I had anxiety/depression, I had to find a way to make employment work, and bounced from entry level job to entry level job trying to stay afloat, but at every job I would have severe anxiety attacks and would either quit, or get fired for missing a day, and then not show up for fear of being judged or criticized by my employer. I'm 21 and I think I've had about 10-12 jobs so far, which I'm sure severely hurts my record and my ability to get hired in the future. nnI'm not working at the moment, and haven't been for about a year thanks to living with my boyfriend's family and subsisting off of financial aid, and I'm deathly afraid of getting another job. I can get through the interviews fine, but working with customers and having to show up every day leaves me emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted. I feel like the customers, my boss, and my coworkers are constantly judging me for my appearance and because I'm just a naturally quiet, introverted person. I literally have to fight with myself every morning to go to uni, and rarely ever speak to anyone there due to my social anxiety, so I feel like having a job would make my anxiety spiral out of control. But i'm so afraid of being out of work for so long, and with my already spotty resume, i'm afraid I'll never get a job even with my degree because I'll have no experience. I can do the interviews just fine, but when it comes to actually sticking to the schedule of having to interact with people 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, I break down into fits of tears and just can't leave my house.nn I've been on meds for depression/anxiety (namely fluoxetine and clonazepam) before, but they didn't help and only made me gain weight because I was always fatigued. These days, when i'm not in class, I can barely leave my bed, and only get up to get food/water and to use the restroom. I'm usually sleeping or on my laptop. I'm afraid of the effects it has on my health, because I'm been slowly gaining weight and the last time I went to get blood work it showed I was pre-diabetic, but the thought of going out for a walk or exercising makes my anxiety go through the roof. Please, any help would be appreciated, I don't know what to do anymore and I feel like my entire existence has no purpose.nnEdit: formatting, wordsn
|
Thanks for the encouragement and helping hand! :) I wanted to wait until I got home to respond so I can really thank you for taking the time out to respond so thoroughly. You're awesome. That being said, let's move on to my response. Also, I'm sure you look fine, and you seem like a beautiful person.nnI guess one thing that I have trouble with is disability. I feel like going on disability, and having that on my permanent record, I feel like I won't be able to be a successful psychologist, which is my career path. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the most knowledgeable person when it comes to disability, so I might be wrong. Also, I feel bad leeching off of the system, even if I do need disability and am justified applying for it. The thought just scares me, yet I feel as though there are so many other people more deserving of that help than me.nnAs for meds, do you think all of the side effects and having to switch meds so often is worth it? I hope you don't take it the wrong way, i'm just curious -- when I was on meds, I felt intensely awful -- brain fog, constant fatigue, headaches, intense breakouts all over, weight gain, nausea. And the depression and anxiety didn't even really subside. Not to mention the lack of insurance is a factor, and I don't think they prescribe anti-depressants at my university clinic. Despite everything, i'm also really cautious about what I put into my body, I eat mostly fruits/veggies/lean meats and don't smoke or do drugs, so the thought of having 7 potential medications that had such terrible side effects floating through my bloodstream in the future makes me kind of queasy. It might be because I have no idea what it actually feels like to have working meds, but I've heard so many terrible things...nnThe therapy, you're absolutely right. No arguments there. I need to go. In fact, I think everyone should have their own personal therapist, the world would be a much better place, haha. In high school, I used to visit the counselors all the time, and they knew me on a personal level. But when my second-parents (i'm adopted) found out that I was seeking out therapy, they banned me from going, and I received a lot of flack for it. They were the
|
I notice I am much less socially anxious when I am one on one with someone and I can actually function and can force myself to communicate much better when there is only one person to talk to. But when I am in a big group conversion or even if there are other people within earshot, I just freeze up and it's very hard to communicate. I just feel like everyone around me is watching me and judging what I say and thinking I sound stupid. But when it's just me one on one with someone I'm more like so what and I care less of what they think of me. 99% of the time other people are within earshot so social anxiety really affects me badly. Even with just one on one I am anxious but like I said not as much.
|
I get more anxious being with one or two people in the same room. Because I feel like I am on the
|
Can you still go shopping or socialize at all?
|
Doesn't matter put yourself in there challenge yourself anxiety won't kill you
|
It feels so excessively artificial and it makes me sick
|
Aye aye captain that's me!
|
This is a disaster the worst case scenario
|
It seems fast pace hectic that's what I'm scared of. A fast paced job will just make me have more anxiety
|
was I in the wrongnnHey everyone I don't know if I was in the wrong or not just need some clarification. Just a bit about me I have severe anxiety, autism,adhd, depression my anxiety has got much better this year i have been able to socialise more but I really struggle in social situations to understand when people are joking or being serious I am also very gullible people used to take advantage of this before I found my partner and she helped me get my life together. I really struggle to understand things she is usually here to explain but she is away right now I can't get hold of her so thought I would ask on here instead I'm not looking for sympathy I'm looking for complete honesty it's how I learn thank you. nnnSo what happened was. I was in my local store and the self checkouts and I put my basket down went to grab a bag the bags are kept by where people queue there was this guy there who was grabbing the bag first I waited I did not look at him as I struggle with eye contact so I can't tell you how he was acting I can also tell you I did not say anything to him due to my anxiety but he goes to me jeez patience I ignored this grabbed my bag walked to self checkout the guy then walks past me shouts at me fucking inbred. I don't know what come over me but I'm so upset with people thinking just because I'm quiet just because I act timid that they can treat me this way I got angry turned to the guy I said
|
You stood up for yourself and that's a good thing! That guy has problems of his own for saying that to you.
|
I haven't really had any luck as far as dating goes. If I like the person I try to let them know what's in store for them and educate them as much as possible on how social anxiety affects me and could potentially affect the relationship. It seems like they are okay with it until they actually see it in action. My anxiety makes me very moody because I frequently go into a state of overthinking and shut down. I've had social anxiety for over 6 years so I'm pretty high functioning and know the exact triggers to stay away from but I'm scared as hell that it's going to be the reason I am never able to be in a relationship. Any advice?
|
For me at least I've found that getting the date and the first 15 mins of the first date are the hardest part. After that it's really not that bad, and honestly finding someone you really connect with and can share vulnerable things with feels good. We (people with SA) tend to be super guarded to protect ourselves from embarrassment, it's really nice to get into a serious relationship and have someone you can let your shields down around. As for advice I like to do activities for a first date, it's a lot less stressful to play mini golf or go on a hike with someone than it is to sit across a table face to face and talk since you have the distraction of the activity.
|
There are random days where I suddenly have the confidence to talk to a large group of people and connect to them well. Other days, I just feel out of the loop and feel super awkward.nnI am not referring to the social battery that runs out over time, moreso being in social situations in general. Throughout a whole event, I can end up being weird and awkward or I can be super friendly and talkative.nnFor example, I'm comfortable with some family gatherings and participate actively in discussions. However, even with the same people on a different day, I don't feel confident at all and end up being completely silent/disconnected.nnI can't think of any reason why this happens because there's no common element I know of that makes me feel more anxious. It kind of is a roulette of, am I going to be social today or not.nnAnyone else feel this way? If so, how do you deal with the anxiousness/awkwardness?
|
Right? It's so unpredictable and I wish there was a better way to control the anxiety.
|
I think I am seriously socially awkward, in that 5 minutes ago I basically third-wheeled a conversation and ran off without saying something. And I'm really confused about this whole issue. I can't hold conversations with more than one person in it, and I always feel very very left out during conversations. Perhaps it's the way I interact. But do you guys have any advice on how to hold a conversation in a more... normal manner? I suppose I type like how I speak so I guess we can observe from here the odd mannerisms or what not. I was just wondering if there is something off-putting about this and in that case how I can change it? Not sure if this is the right subreddit to post it in. But regardless, thanks, guys!
|
>I was just wondering if there is something off-putting about this and in that case how I can change it?nnnThese thoughts that your conversations is off putting is leading to this problem.nn>I always feel very very left out during conversations.nnnAs you probably speak less because you think you are conversating wrong. The truth is there is not really a 'wrong' way to conversate. There are unusual ways but there is probably nothing wrong with them.nnThe only thing you can do is to try, keep trying and if people say that you are being weird then to improve on it. nnnBut honestly your problem is probably your social awkwardness, and do you know what's causing your social awkwardness? The fact that you think/know that you're socially awkward, so you speak less and maybe act weirdly because you know your socially awkward. The solution? Just keep trying and you will slowly improve. You just have to try.nnGood luck!
|
But then, that friend I talk to basically just admitted that he doesn't want to talk to me. It feels so heart shattering cause he was the first person I actually tried effort to be friends with. Sadly I got too clingy and too talkative.
|
Oh that kinda sucks, but you talked to someone and even if it didn't work out well this time it will at some point! don't give up and try not to worry about it too much.
|
For example, at work- I feel like my coworkers developed this instant rapport and just became friends (maybe surface level, but still friends) almost immediately. Whereas it takes me time to open up to people, so I'm stuck in the acquaintance stage. Nobody dislikes me, but I can't make that instant connection. You know, the one where they barely know each other but feel like they've been friends for years. nnIdk if I'm articulating this well, but if you get what I'm saying and can relate please let me know! I feel so alone sometimesnnEdit: I just want to thank everyone who responded, it's good to know there are others in the same boat! Hopefully we can all work through this. I also appreciate the advice (although a lot of it, like “matching the extroverted energy,” seems to require overcoming SA…). Hope I can do that one day lol
|
I have a coworker where we wouldn't talk at all really for years and now we're like besties lmao. No one can even imagine that we weren't best friends from the start, i would be like what are you talking about, this just happened. nnWe joke about it now. nnAnd I know exactly what you mean, I used to be jealous at my colleagues when I saw them talking so easily. But after 4 years now, I've noticed that I am just a part of their team as the rest, so it really was all in my head. I sometimes get surprised at how much they want to include me.
|
So I've faced a lot that actually caused me to have terrible anxiety around people, (injury that interfered with social skills/reading body language, abusive friends, etc) But I'm just so tired of letting it control me. I've never really gotten better because I never actually tried. I was comfortable in it, anxiety kept me away from people, which in turn eased my fears about fucking up in public. But it's gotten to the point where I can't go to college classes without music on my phone.nnI did something I never in my life thought I would be brave enough to do. I left my phone at home to do shopping and actually tried to have conversations with people. I was absolutely terrified the entire time but I knew pausing or taking things slow for myself wouldn't end well, it gave me too much time to think about what I could be doing wrong and undo my progress.nnI've been forced by friends and family to be social before, but it's a lot different when you do it for yourself. The entire time I was out (3 hours, big difference from staying inside just about all day) I just repeated that I was a stranger, nobody cared what I did. And even if I did something stupid, I most likely would never see these people again. It was.... really surprising how much it worked. It was exhausting and I probably won't go out for that long at one time again, but I'm really happy for doing it.nnI think for anyone suffering the same severe levels I do, don't be afraid to try new things. You obviously don't have to do what I did! I know that would really not work for most people! But figuring out a crutch or excuse for not going out or talking, getting rid of that will do you wonders. The world can be a big scary place, especially when it feels like all eyes are on you, but you aren't alone. And chances are those people don't care anyway. nnTl;Dr- Nobody's perfect, so don't worry about trying to be. Do what you can in your own way!
|
Man, I have to tell you that reading your post has inspired me to try to go out there and do something. It's only by pushing our comfortable boundaries that we grow, and it's something I've not done quite enough. Thank you for posting this and I hope people can see that we can take small steps that push us little by little out of those comfort zones we cling to so easily.
|
Is puberty and sa connected
|
Mine started in grade school. I had a pronounced speech impediment and was mocked relentlessly for it. Middle school was horrible for me. The bullying stopped in high school but by then i was so overwhelmed with social phobia
|
I know this is silly, but I'm on a skype call with a guy I've been interested in, listening to him snore. We talked for so long that he actually fell asleep on me!nnI had been putting off talking to him for weeks on Skype , and here we are finally voice chatting. I didn't think he would like me or that I had anything interesting to say but here we are. He's actually a really sweet guy..nnSincerely, nnA girl had been previously too terrified to use voice chat. Ever.
|
aww, that sounds really sweet! nnI've been longing for being in a similarly exciting, romantic situation for a really long time.
|
Yep, not a lot to say. Was talking to his best friend (former FWB) the entire time. I'm pretty anxious and struggle with trust issues. I (regretfully) asked I this would be something I could be concerned about and if he would cheat Told me he couldn't guarantee anything because she's his best friend. Asked why he didn't just date her, said it wasn't the right time. Also said doesn't love me at all but that he cares for me. nnYeah, I'm not feeling the best right now. Little upset because I've been working in therapy to put myself out there more and not let my anxiety dictate my decisions. It was really hard to confront him as I have a fear of confrontation. This triggered an episode this weekend and I haven't been able to get anything done. I managed to at least get out of bed to get some groceries.
|
I usually doesn't encourage violence however this MF deserves Slap straight to the face.it's his flute because if he knew he wasn't ready for a relationship he should have said so to begin with. nHe could end things as well and don't waste your time.
|
I have liked her since the end of last year until now. We have only spoken once and I feel everyday I don't speak to her my chances with he dwindle. I really really like her and I am looking for some encouraging words to help me talk to her. I feel that its either my SA interfering with this or I just really like her and can't speak to her. Thanks! nEDIT: Thanks everyone for the advice, I'm working on strategies to try and talk to her.
|
It's a bit hard to give you much advice without more context. How are you with small talk? Sure, it's maybe not the most interesting thing you could possibly say, but at this point, you just gotta make some words come out of your mouth, dude. With time, you can build a rapport and get to the point that asking her out won't be completely out of the blue. nnI really think the SA is making this more tough for you than it needs to be. Most people get nervous around crushes, but SA makes it so much more difficult to push the nerves aside and act. I recently started medication and it costs me about 5 bucks for my prescription. If that's a possibility for you, maybe check into that. nnWords of encouragement: As a girl, I can confidently tell you that if you just talk to this girl, she isn't going to think you're a creep. Plenty of people have struck up conversations with me, and I always talk to them (even though I have SA) unless I'm seriously feeling threatened. She's just going to think that you're being friendly. Start being friendly and work your way up. Just smile and say
|
There is this girl who I have liked all year since I got moved into some of her classes. She sits to the left of me in maths (technically as I'm facing forward and then a. Gap and she is at on the side face left words) but she sits in front of me in science (a few rows with a lot of people in between but when I look at her in looking straight and she will be looking at me.) I've been looking at her all year saying I'm going to talk to her, I'm going to talk to her. Just yesterday she broke up with her boyfriend. I've known her now ex boyfriend all my life (we have been in the same class at school until we were 11), so I've tagged along with him after I found out he was dating the girl. The girl I like and her friend always say to me hi an fall I say is hi back every time I always say in my head, just say somthin more than hi but at the last second I back out and say hi. Recently I made a facebook account to add a friend so he can link his steam. I went on it about a week later expecting to see some /r/thathappend or some /r/facepalm type posts like my friend liked as he's a troll and found a single friend request from the girl I've left it pending for about 4 days and yesterday I plucked up the courage to accept. Today I sat there for 2 hours with the word hi typed in the message box really wanting to send it but to afraid to do. Today she broke up with her now ex boyfriend and now that she is single what should I do. nnSorry for bad formating I'm on mobile and I'm tired and nervous from wanting to speak to her and I wanted to try to talk to someone and didnt have time to make it flow. Thank you for reading.
|
Thanks for the advice also good luck on your flight (always say it to people as I get really ill if I have to go on a plane as I hate hights and fast things and if it helps me saying it to other might help them if they don't like it). Also I would not be able to take her on a date as I will get all ready and at the last minute I will chicken out it's also very hard for me to get there as I'm 14 my dad will just try to embarress me and so would my mum.
|
I complained that I was bored this weekend- just chatting, I spent the whole time at home. and my mom said to me, why don't you catch up with your friends?nnnnn
|
All I know is the longer you avoid something the harder it gets. As hard as it is, we have to push ourselves constantly. Baby steps is key, forcing yourself to do something way out of your comfort zone will just make it worse. Do something that overcomes your social anxiety everyday, start small and work your way up. Even if that means just giving a pizza delivery guy a call and making an order. It will make you feel so much better and confident when you actually follow through with something your scared of, then it can grow from there. nnIf your anxiety is completely beyond your own control, then seek professional help. I know with social anxiety just stepping into the door to talk to someone can be hard. But know that they are so used to seeing people who need help and they wont judge you. And again, just heading in a direction which you know will improve your anxiety will make you feel so much better. Progress is so important, depression sneaks in when we get to complacent
|
I feel like my bed is pulling me in. I want to workout or draw or read or do something, but I feel this heavy negative energy pulling me back down to my bed. Ive gotten more negative about situation like I can do anything or accomplish anything. I'm supposed to graduate in the spring and idk what I'm going to do. I don't know what I want to do. I feel like I'm just disappointing everyone around me including myself. And my comfort is laying in bed and sleeping for hours at a time. I want to be more positive and idk where to start. I'm so nervous to start school again. I just want to have a starting point to get back to a positive mindset
|
I get the same way. I feel like there is a heavy cloak on me weighing me down. It's hard to focus. My mind races. I can't get anything done. It sucks.
|
For me , moving to Europe and inability to speak the host language and negative feed back about my nationality , made me to suffer from a high level of social anxiety. Especially northern Europeans are not really open and warm and friendly. nI don't even bother to learn the language because I have not enough confidence to talk with a shitty level of the language. Nor people are actually interested to talk about it with me. nWhat does trigger your anxiety ??
|
Shame. I don't know why, but it's been with me all my life. I am ashamed of different embarrassing situations that happened to me. Because of this I am afraid to do any social things, because I am afraid that people will think badly of me. All my attempts to fit in socially ended up being awkward and ridiculous. And now I even try not to think about it because I am ashamed. I think shame is one of the main reasons. The more things happened to me the harder it is to communicate with people now.
|
I try to live alone if/when it's possible. Any time I live with roommates, I feel like a prisoner to my room because I want to avoid having social interactions when I'm not in the mood to have it, which is a lot.nnI will sit in my room starving rather than go to the kitchen to get food because there's people in it. I will wait to use the bathroom if I have to pass by people in say a living room on the way to it or during a time when I know the bathroom gets busy with people coming and going.nnI usually emerge at night when everyone goes to sleep like some nocturnal creature to shower, eat, or do anything in the common areas of the home. I feel so ridiculous sometimes.
|
Hey seriously. Living with a large household is annoying. Everybody's moving around and you cant just block everything out.
|
As someone with social anxiety I'm more fragile and sensitive with insults/rude comments. And it sort of just makes me feel humiliated and depressed. nnI just posted something earlier and someone decided to insult/mock me instead of answering my question :/. I don't want to get into details please don't ask but that was the gist of it. And that person got upvoted with their mean comment and my post got downvoted.nnI know exactly why people are like this here. It's the internet. You get to say things you wouldn't say to people in real life. You're more harsher than you are in real life.nnBut I can't help but feel hurt when someone makes negative comments despite knowing this.nnJust needed to rant. From now on I'll just shut myself out and never post nor comment. Just stay a lurker so I don't get hurt :/
|
I used to react pretty strongly to people online. Now I'm in the habit of immediately blocking everyone who says something mean (to me or anyone else). It's pretty cathartic - i feel like I'm cleaning my feed, one little scrubby at a time.
|
I was bullied as a adolescent, teen and adult and it has had catastrophic consequences on my anxiety and depression and view of the world, especially men
|
I was bullied, verbally by the class and mentally by my only friend. I think that my anxiety does stem in some way from there, yes, even though I'm in a supportive friend group now. It's taken me so long ti be even okay with people thinking of my as a friend, and i absolutely will not even consider a best friend or even a friend, the friend group are family. It sounds weird, but i guess it's how i cope with still being social.
|
Does anyone get nervous talking to their boss? Every time I talk to someone at my work I verbally vomit.
|
Yes, I avoid talking to them and it's ruining my life.
|
Idk if this goes here, I just need to write. I just left the most embarrassing situation of my life and I want to shoot myself. I can not think of a worst situation. Make a LONG story short w/ a tl;dr.. A woman I wanted for so long, and I left the friend zone. At first no friend zone, then friend zoned.... she goes quiet and reconnects. nnSo after a great date I leave and head home, and I probably should not of been driving but I did. Lets not focus on that. I need to take a shot of whiskey, cause this is so difficult to think about. If I had a gun I would literally blow my brains out. Thank god for being a democrat. So where was I? another shot of whiskey first. this is bad. Not even Brand New the band can save me from this. So you are all probably wondering what happened. nnDate goes well, chick calls me over to fuck. So Imp like fuck yea brt. Idk if it is stress, meds I am on, the beer. But I was not able to maintain an erection. I want to blow my brains out, there is nothing worse and obviously that is a hyperbole. nnBut god damn, what cosmic joke is this shit????? I am a former addict and on suboxone and I admit right now I am wasted. But no I was not this wasted when I drove. I was actually coherent. I had to get out of there and she basically threw me out. 3 times in my life this happened. Once was very high. once was very high. BUT NEVER ON THE FIRST FUCK, and when I say this chick is hot... she is fucking hot. She tried working it too. I couldn't maintain a erection. and now she wont respond. so.... options to stop the extra hate towards myself? I actually found someone who I connected with. But how good is a connection, if it doesn't weather thisnn​nnSo I am ready for the roasting. Id roast me.
|
take tranylcypromine or its gonne be another pentobarbital case
|
I really want to work in medicine and hopefully become a doctor but I'm afraid because I know I'd have to talk to people all day. Most of all I'm afraid of having to tell someone bad news and having to comfort them because I know my awkwardness will make the situation 10 times worse.
|
I'm in engineering right now, about to graduate. It does suck for that reason, but also because networking is important for finding a job. However, if you make good grades (~3.5+, not me lol), finding a job becomes significantly easier without having to go as hard on the networking. Idk what to tell you about the group projects lol, but if I got through it, so can you. If you enjoy it, definitely go for it.
|
I scheduled a phone appointment with a general practitioner ($75) hoping to get some kind of medication. He talked to me for 3 minutes, recommended I talk to a mental health professional. nnI talked to the therapist today ($99), and apparently she cannot prescribe medication. She wants me to talk with a psychiatrist. I checked the prices for a consultation and it's like $290. PLUS the therapist wants me to keep doing sessions with her that I can't afford and that I know won't help (I've done therapy a couple of times and it's always just a lot of BS that never helps). nnI NEED some kind of medication but I'm running in (extremely expensive) circles trying to get it. Why? It doesn't make sense to me and I'm really pissed off because I'm trying to get help and it's impossible to get. nnWhat do I do? Short of drinking myself halfway to death every day or calling it quits right now, I can't think of anything.
|
That sucks. That's all I can say. It sounds like you are being robbed. I can't help because I don't know how it works where you live. I hope someone else can help you.
|
I was seriously overweight a few years ago, and it was a hard won fight to me lose all of the plus weight over the years. This was one of my biggest insecurity of that time, and she had sent me a photo of that just now.nShe didn't have any bad intention though, she just wanted to point out my success, but it didn't workout the way she wanted. nnAlthough my breathing got better a little bit by the time I writing this, the pain in my chest is still persist.nnI asked her not to do it again, but I'm afraid it wasn't a nice thing to do from my part.
|
That was a really well written comment. Congratulations on your weight loss. I just read the comment and I concur. Hope all is well
|
So I have a public speaking class coming up for a college course I'm taking. This is the only class that I'm worried about because it's the only one in which my performance is beyond my control. I can study for the math and physics classes, but no amount of study will take away the physical side effects of SA. I know that I'll pull through, but it will be rough. I'm not normally one to turn to drugs for my problems but I'll take all of the help I can get for this.nnWhen I start speaking I will almost certainly get noticeably shaky and my heart rate will sky rocket. I feel like I loose a lot of control over my muscles because I get so tense. This leads to some odd twitching because I'm trying to stop shaking. I can deliver a speech if I'm nervous, but I would do much better if it weren't for these physical side effects. Are there any over the counter meds that might be able to help? Something to relax my muscles and calm me down? n
|
It very well could be just a deficiency that it helps with, or there's other stuff in it that they're not advertising on the site... But I've used it off and on for at least 4-5 years and there is a very big noticeable difference. I originally got some from my mom, who'd used it before and had fantastic results, and she'd gotten it on recommendation from someone else who had similar results. I don't know the chemistry of what's going on, but I'd highly recommend trying it for yourself to see. But like I said, for severe stress, I'd say take 2, or even 3 at once and you'll feel it.
|
I just can't handle it unless my anxiety goes away
|
Exposire therapy might work. My panic attacks have improved leap and bounds. Tasks that seemed impossible are now routine for me.
|
How did you guys finally learn how to talk to people without running out of things to talk and without being too awkward.
|
Reflect on yourself after talking to someone maybe? Learn what you could have said, literally anything
|
I'm going to go to the counselor some day this week to talk to her about my shyness/social anxiety and I'm so scared I don't know when she'll call me up. it can be any of these days and at any time and I'm gonna cry of how anxious I will be and embarrass myself
|
My lips were somehow my fingers aren't maybe I didn't bite them that deep
|
Does anyone get nervous poops? and if so, what do you do to combat it?nnWhat i mean is, every time i have to go out, I start REALLY needing to use the toilet for a number 2.
|
YES. It's the worst at school and you start to get anxious..I feel like at school there's this unspoken rule that you should never poop at school (understandable, because bathroom stalls), but I just feel like pooping so bad, but I refuse to do so because I am at school. That familiar drop in your stomach, haha.
|
Subsets and Splits
No community queries yet
The top public SQL queries from the community will appear here once available.