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1. I hate talking on the phone Especially if I don't know the person very well. I prefer to text. nn2. When I finally feel comfortable enough to talk to someone I feel like I talk so much that I actually hyperventilate. I get lightheaded. nn3. Waiting in lines or waiting rooms are the worst. nn4. My anxiety is amplified 100% if I have to poo. nn5. I can't do Sit down restaurants without constantly going to the restroom to have control of the situation. Unless they have outdoor eating areas then I can do it. nn6. I feel physically sick like I will throw up when my anxiety strikes. nn7. My home is my safe area. nn8. If I have to drive people even family I need the windows down or I will start freaking out. If I'm alone windows are always up. nn9. I can't say no, I will agree to something with no intention on doing what ever it is. nn10. Ticks. In my case it a click-snort. It's very embarrassing. I click my mouth like I'm tasting something louder than normal with a snort immediately after. Sometimes there are a lot of clicks before the snort will be satisfying.
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1) Absolutely. My job requires answering the phone a fair bit, and I've gotten used to it, but I have to psyk myself up every time before I pick up the receiver, and any thoughts in my mind tend to just evaporate as soon as the phone call starts.nn2) Not that extreme, but yeah. Once I actually get going, I will just talk and talk until I realize what I'm doing and then I go find a corner to die in.nn3) Yep, for sure. I take public transit, and I would much rather walk to the next stop than spend five minutes waiting for the bus to arrive. I go to a pharmacy in a supermarket so I can shop/wander the shelves instead of waiting for my prescription.nn4) Don't have that one thankfully.nn5) I can do restraunts on a good day. In fact, sometimes I love being surrounded by people while invisibly staying by myself. On other days however, I ain't going out of my apartment.nn6) Never feel the need to vomit, but I hyperventilate, get a migraine, experience muscle pain, and my hearing gets super sensitive.nn7) My room is my domain. Sometimes I can't even stand being in other rooms of my apartment.nn8) I don't drive. I hate cars. They are high-speed metal death boxes and I get very anxious just being in one. I'm also claustrophobic and motion-sick.nn9) I HAVE to appear reliable, and I cannot refuse a request. I do my best to avoid people in general, but if someone asks something of me at work, I'll do it, even if alarm bells start going off in my head.nn10) My leg shakes up a storm. I always have to be moving some part of my body or fiddling with something. I have lost many a watch because I kept taking it off to play with it and eventually leave is somewhere accidentally. My left eye will sometimes twitch too, and I have this awful laugh that I make all the time when in unwanted conversations.nnBonus) Running into people somewhere I don't expect them. Like, what are you doing here!? No! Stop existing! You are only supposed to exist at work, and that is the only place I should ever see you!
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I wanted to post on r/familiesyouchoose, but the rules are that before posting you have to have a 10+ day old account and also a comment history.nnI don't mind waiting, the 10+ days is understandable, but I'm worried about not being able to get a comment history going. Just posting this is terrifying enough, I can't imagine having to figure out random things to keep commenting on here. Not to mention it feels like I'll be judged and rejected because my posts aren't revealing enough about whether or not I'm a creeper or deserving of friendship or something.nnI guess this post is, does anyone have tips on gaining a little karma without having to put oneself out too far? I've thought about commenting in other threads, but what could I possibly even say when it's so uncomfortable saying anything at all?
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Thanks for the encouragement, and the reply, much appreciated. It's a self-esteem problem I think, just feel like whatever I have to say has either already been said or is completely unnecessary to the discord. This whole posting and replying thing makes me feel sick inside. I know interaction is the only way to form connections, but the inner tension is hard to handle.nnr/FamiliesYouChoose is a community a friend recommended to me for trying to find people to connect with and possibly a mentor. I'm not exactly young(30-something), but I've often wished I could find a parental figure to lean on and look up to, so he thought maybe I could try there.nnI could also awkwardly ramble on about that, so I can relate. I don't mind a bit of rambling though, for what it's worth. :)
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Any gamers in here. Any gamers have as hard of a time as me just trying to chat or talk during a game or anything? nI can't even make friends over a gaming console.
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Same, I can talk to people on Skype without anxiety, for some reason I get nervous when I'm face to face with someone.
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The problem is that introverts are the minority and it's hard to impress people when being
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My friend is a programmer who sees me more often than his coworkers. I see him about once every 6 months or so
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Due to social anxiety I feel like I've missed out on life such as opportunities for growth and joy. I created boundaries and restrictions to not go places or enjoy or put myself in those situations to learn something new or explore the world. I feel such a loser. Seriously for real, I hate anxiety and low self esteem. Why can't I just be normal.
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The good thing and bad thing is that overcoming social anxiety is 50% rebuilding your self esteem and 50% socializing through the anxiety.
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Everyday recently I've awoken and done absolutely nothing productive with my day, the only thing I do is sleep and play video games that bore me. I lack any and all motivation to do anything to make progress in my life and I am absolutely broke due to not having any money saved or any interest in working. I dont seem to have any idea of what the hell im doing with myself and I'm stuck in this pickle of fantasizing about killing myself because of how shit I feel while also being absolutely terrified of dying. I'm currently dealing with some really freaky & strange physical symptoms as well that have lasted months, which exponentially worsen everything going on in my head, but there aren't any doctors appointments available for at least 3 months since my health insurance is absolute shit. Its as if my life is hanging by a thread yet I can't do anything to fix whats going on, I've tried reaching out to my family and friends but have given up doing so because they don't really understand what exactly I'm feeling and don't consider what I'm dealing with as an urgent situation. I'm only 21 years old, which is very young in the eyes of many people on here I'm sure, but I can't stop myself from thinking that I'm just doomed to die early by whatever the fuck it is that I'm experiencing, I have a past history of hypochondria too so when things like this arise I start to go insane and panic immensely. I dont know if anyone will actually read this but either way I'm leaving this here as a way to try to relieve some frustration and not completely internalize my thoughts until I have an extreme mental breakdown.
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I fantasize about my funeral too! I've been doing it ever since I was a kid. I saw this seen when I was young:nnhttps://youtu.be/84zjn6WdtHwnnEver since then it's been a thing for me. I imagine dying. Whether it's a fade to black or just an emptiness, like flipping off a light switch. Or is it like turning off a video game that you didn't save the progress on. You just turn it off and it's meaningless.nnA couple books that have helped me in the past are u201cUnfuck yourselfu201d and u201cthe simple art of not giving a fucku201dnnUnfuck yourself was a big one for me. I suggest you listen to the prologue on your tube and see if it helps you. nnhttps://youtu.be/ohIUuwZcLWE
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So I was in a call with my best friend and he said let's game tonight and it was 22:23 so I was like no we can tomorrow. Then he said well we're busy tomorrow, and I said no we aren't it's Friday. Then he said yeah we are, I replied saying, I'm not doing anything tomorrow what are yo my doing and he said nothing it's on a need to know basis. I said oh ok then we got off of the call. nnI feel like I am always being left out of things. I see one of my other closest friends putting pictures on his social of him and others having fun at a lake. I used to go to these things then I just stopped being invited. I would hear about them and it would make me sad. Does this happen to anyone else?
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It hurts and i feel like it shouldn't.
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It's an online dating app and I've set up an account because I think I'm maybe ready to start doing this kind of thing (I'm 36, never had a relationship). She asked me about my cat, I asked her about hers. nnBut now... what do I do? How do I make conversation, by text to a person I don't know? How long before we try to meet each other? If I ask too early will that seem creepy? nnThere's a message waiting right now, but I'm afraid to even look at it! Now I'm getting a headache. nnAny advice? Particularly if anyone with severe social anxiety has done this kind of thing??
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I'm not familiar with Tinder but I'm going to assume it's just like any other dating site.nnThe key to keeping a conversation going is to ask questions until you reach something you both have a common interest in and you can just share feelings and experiences.nnSo you both have cats? What kind of cat? How did she get the cat - a breeder or adopted? How about yours? Does she exclusively adopt? Why?nnIt can be awkward but don't give up. nn
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Just a backstory, I work at Tim Hortons and I'm constantly meeting new coworkers. Most of the time, there's no proper introduction because of the busyness of the environment but when its slower, you actually have time to talk. nnIt's in these moments before they realize you're different that I really have no trouble. I've gotten pretty good at asking people about themselves, etc, etc but no matter what I do, I can never joke around or get into the comfortable stage with them. That's when they start thinking I'm not normal. That I'm awkward and weird and maybe even stuck-up and not just shy.nnIt hurts honestly. It hurts to see them try and joke, tease you for fun and just not being able to reciprocate. My mind goes blank at that point, my words fall out of my mouth like a skipping record. They think I get offended and apologize when I know it's just a joke. Then they see that you are always uncomfortable, avoiding their presence, trying to look unnecessarily busy. They try to engage in conversation hoping it'd be
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To do something that seems scary or something that you don't feel confident in your ability to achieve. For example, if you see someone you're attracted to and want to talk to, there is risk involved in talking to them. They might reject you. They might ignore you. The possibilities are endless. But by avoiding risk over and over, you are closing yourself off from trying new things and gaining experience, and failure is the best way to learn from mistakes and improve. nnThe best way to treat any phobia is to expose the subject to that phobia over and over until they finally realize their fear was irrational.
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I (21m) was sitting outside with three other men (45m+) one of which was my uncle and then this happened.nnI just came back from the market complaining about the high price of pineapples, and then I said
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What do you exactly mean?
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How do you go about looking for a job, or staying at your current job when you have social anxiety
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This is great and a lot of information that I needed. Your step by step method has lessened the anxiety I feel by breaking down the approach. nWhats hardest is knowing once I get a job, every time I have to work I'll have to face up to the anxiety, when not having one just lets me forget about it as if I don't have it. nI fear rejection, and also not getting along with co-workers as well, but this fear has slowly drained my funds and I can't afford to do much else which is wrecking all other areas of my life. The worst is, I've been pushing it away for so long, that I have no real skills to offer. So then I think of going back to school, but how classroom environments will trigger the anxiety again. It's like a cycle and I don't know what to tackle first. Gets too overwhelming so I've been pushing it aside for years.nnI feel like there's a lot of go go go in my head, especially as I'm getting older, but in reality nothing is happening and it's giving me intense anxiety. I do write a lot but it takes so much to put it into action. I will take one step at a time, as I'm sure there is a tipping point if I keep on trying where it will just feel more natural. It's so easy to avoid it all so I can pretend it's not here, because sometimes I almost feel it's not there, I can ease into other things like hanging with friends and tending to hobbies, when really it's a distraction so i can let life pass by without any real responsibilities. I needed this from someone, so thanks!, everyone else I know can't understand why I don't get a job seeing that it's such a menial thing for them. It's a nice breakdown and writing this response has actually exposed more into my own thoughts than I had expected. It's given me a chance to look inwards.
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My washing has been piling up for like 1-2 months and I still can't do my washing, even though I need to wear fresh clean clothes - it doesn't motivate me to do it
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Yup and then finally that one day you have the motivation and you do it all then you don't fold it for another 3 months…
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Has anyone else started on this amount and then worked your way up? Starting low since I had a TERRIBLE reaction to prozac and ended up in the er. That freaked me the heck out so I'm starting off this one slowwwww. I figure maybe a week in 2.5, then a week on 5, then on to 10. I've only taken it 2 days so far. Only reaction has been some stomach upset, but I'm not sure if that's due to the med or my anxiety about the med (since my anxiety manifests as nausea and stomach upset a lot of the time). I'd be curious to hear about others experiences.
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Jumped right into 10 then 20. Worked great despite the weight gain
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I think I have social anxiety and I litterally have no self confidence even writing this makes my chest tight because i think what if no one replies then ill look so stupid. Main reasons I believe I have SA is have difficulty interacting with strangers and people, if they start a conversation with me I will say something back, but I can never keep it going because i think what if i say something embarrassing or what if i mess up and they hate me or think bad things about me.nnIf i think i said something wrong or stupid, my face goes so red and i hide behind my phone or pretend to look at my phone. nnI also think I look embarrassing and that a lot of people think im weird or hate me straight away (i think a lot of ppl hate me and i have to remind myself they dont)nnI struggle to go find work or if i have the option to cancel a social event i would without a second thought because socialising stresses me out. nnBut one of my family members tells me everybody experiences that and that i just don't put in enough effort and that i need to pull my head out of my a. Its comments like that, that make me think i don't have social anxiety, maybe i really am just lazy which makes me think the worst about myself. nnI have more reasons why I think I have SA but the list will go on and on, but yeah I just want some grounding do you guys think I have SA and should i get help?
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Already onto it have to wait about a week to hear back from them.
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This was a while ago but just popped into my head.nnNot to be big headed but I was considered 'good looking' nAnd it's that horrible feeling when you can tell that ppl are attracted to you by your looks, and then after speaking to them, they aren't anymore.nnI started a new job and my line manager saidn
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Uhhh what? That's a weird one.
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I have reflected a big on myself/my behavior and wanted to share this thought with you. nnI have been diagnosed with social anxiety about 1.5 years ago and have been in counseling ever since, and it helped somewhat. Although I have made some progress, for instance it's easier to connect with friends of my roommates or so, I have developed a behavior which is a
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Would you have remained friends if you had stopped appeasing him? Would you still be friends if you had asserted yourself and become more authentic? Was there room for growth and change in that friendship? If you can answer yes to those questions then reach out to him. If your answer is no then let yourself off the hook and move on. It's not toxic to free ourselves from controlling, manipulating people...especially the ones who claim to be friends. It's those people and those kinds of relationships that are toxic.
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four years and I still have a long way to go. Along the way I've discovered how much of a difference, for better or for worse, a medication can make. When I started on 10 mg of Lexapro (escitalopram) my social anxiety had loosened its grip on me ever so slightly, which was a world of difference for me. When I went up to 20 mg and worked my ass off at CBT I overcame my social anxiety completely. Turns out I have a lot more anxiety than just social and the depression didn't budge, but it was a step in the right direction.nnSome time ago I started taking Wellbutrin (bupropion) as well. I started having a level of energy that I never thought existed and it helped a great deal. Then my anxiety went on a rather heavy bender and suddenly I was unable to sleep at all. My body was incredibly tense during the day, I was anxious to the point of panic attacks and I barely slept minutes each night. From what I read online, the Wellbutrin may very well have contributed to this.nnNow I'm going to try to change up my medication again, with a psychologist, a psychiatrist and a regular doctor whom I trust and who know me very well. I am very motivated to get it right, which is why I wanted to ask you about which symptoms were relieved to what extent by a medication you used, and if there were any side effects. Thanks in advance, a big big thanks.nnI'm interested in SSRI's, SNRI's, buspar/buspirone, whatever you got to help your anxiety and/or depression.
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More than anything all I can really tell you is you have to keep trying different things. Lots of medications have crazy numbers, like for some, 50% of people just won't tolerate it well and shouldn't be taking it. There's no one size fits all solution here - what is a miracle drug for one person is a fkn nightmare for something else. At least from my experience, I'm u2018treatment resistant' so I have to kind of live with some awful side effects, it's just a question of picking which I can kind of live with. I won't say which specific side effects I get from which drug because you probably would have a different experience anyway - I've tried medications that other people swear by that really fucked me up.nnIt's good that you're doing all the other stuff like cbt and meditation. The truth is all these pills have some adverse side effects, some of which can get worse over time, like if you're taking medication for your whole life it can wear on your liver and kidneys, so the ideal situation is to wean yourself off them and be naturally happy. For some of us that might not ever be an option, so finding minimal side effects is essential. Having a weak appetite sounds like one of the least bad side effects out there haha, but maybe it's worse than it sounds. I've taken pills that just make me throw up everything even water until I stop taking them, or make me bleed when I poop or I no longer have any sex drive and just want to die all the time lol so I would say that seems pretty manageable lol.nnYeah I'm not sure what caused the panic attacks but if that happened soon after taking the bupropion then definitely stop taking it (if you're sure that's the problem, I'd just stop taking it ASAP personally - I don't think Wellbutrin has much withdrawal issues anyway? Def google that first though). Don't be afraid to question what your doctors give you - they're just guessing, it's all just probability in terms of what might work.
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For the past 3 years of hs i have been dealing with what i think is severe social anxiety, i can't look at someone like i normally use to when i was younger without getting horrible thoughts and blushing. Because of this on going issue, i believe i have developed coping methods to help hide away my fear of blushing, i feel people can sense my deep down thoughts and are disgusted and dislike me because of them, whether this is my brain playing tricks is hard to know. Because of this i have acted dumber than i am or
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Have you looked into OCD, since you were talking about intrusive thoughts? Of course I dont know, just throwing it out there. I have OCD and social anxiety and get these types of thoughts too, I have slightly different fears and thoughts but yeah what you wrote sounds so familiar. Sorry to ramble about myself.. I'm so sorry you're dealing with all this, that's so so stressful, you're definitely not alone and I hope things will get better really soon, internet hug.
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I am in high school and have social anxiety. I constantly feel really warm or hot inside and can't look people in the eye. I always blush over the littlest things, and I don't know why triggers it. I recently got a counselor that I am scheduled to see tomorrow, any suggestions on medications to calm me down or something? Anybody know any minerals or vitamins I can take before class to help calm me? I have recently given up masturbation because I heard that can lead to social anxiety. Help is wanted!
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Yea I brought that up to him and he said if some of the techniques he showed me didn't work, we could talk to my doctor about prescribing something, he said maybe Xanax, hopefully I will make it to the medications, because so far the techniques aren't working.
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Lots of people hate it and literally deny it. This is the most powerful and best solution that ends social anxiety completely, and is just putting yourself in the situations you avoid and fear by setting a goal, commitment, and staying in them for a short time. Sure, this is the biggest obstacle for you that you don't want to put yourself out there but make sure with a serious and ambitious intention you will once and for all get rid of something called social anxiety in a shorter time than you think
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This. It's kind of like your clueless uncle who tells you to
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I have a meeting scheduled for sometime in the next hour (whenever they come get me) to review my yearly bonus with my bosses. So it's a good meeting, yet my heart is literally pounding so hard right now I can practically feel myself shaking. I feel tingly and hot/cold all over. I hate that I have reactions like this any time I have even a semi-formal sit down with my boss. For context, I work at a pretty small company and have a good, relatively informal relationship with everyone. So why do I still feel my anxiety shoot through the roof in situations like this??
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Yes anxiety get really high around authority figures.
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Hi Guys , please help me, Seems like I'm kinda big Zero nI don't wanna die , What should I do ud83dude14
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Therapist here.nnThere are many things you can do. Medication is not a panacea, it is not going to fix or resolve your depression. What medication does is to stabilize your brain chemistry so that you can do the things you need to do in order to overcome your depression without it getting in the way. nnWith that said, here are a few suggestions, as well as a few questions.nn How is your diet?n Are you physically active?n How are you sleeping?n Are you drinking enough water?nnThe questions above are very important, because depression is, in part, a physical illness. If you take charge of your body, many symptoms will resolve in relatively short order. Now for a few suggestions:nn Get activen Prioritize eating well, sleeping more, and drinking more water n Begin practicing mindfulnessn Begin identifying triggers for your depression. n What are you depressed about?n Why?n For how long?n What aggravates those thoughts and feelings?n Once you begin to answer those questions, begin picking apart the answers. What I mean by this is, think about your answers. This is called meta-cognition (thinking about your thoughts). This will allow you to separate the true things to be depressed about from the secondary or tertiary causes that were most likely caused by the primary causes, and which are most likely untrue.n Meta-cognition becomes easier once you begin practicing mindfulness, as mindfulness slows down the speed and lessens the ferocity at which your thoughts, particularly your invasive, negative thoughts, come at you. It's a bit like tetris. Mindfulness is the early stage when everything is slow and you have plenty of time to consider where each and every piece should go. Depression and anxiety are like the later stages where pieces are falling like rain and you're just slotting them wherever you can.nnThese are just a few general thoughts. If you want to talk privately in greater depth, feel free to DM me.
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(TW - (sexual) assault/suicide)nnSo in the last few days I've just fallen back into another depressive episode, and while I have a fair amount of energy and physical motivation this time, my thoughts are not in a good place (not in terms of sh/suicide but a strong dislike of myself and feeling unworthy and such). nnFor some reason, I have started having intrusive thoughts. I have experience them to a degree in the past, but I took a walk today and had serious problems in regards to my thought process, but I don't know at what point it becomes paranoia. nnBasically, I've had it in my head that people are going to hurt me or assault me. Someone walks past and I think they're going to try and grope me, or I see someone walking or driving in the distance and I think they're going to start following me or they're going to corner me. I'm thinking of the best escape route, the closest house I could run to, what's the most efficient text message I could send if they do take me to help the police find me. It's to the point where I'll be walking down the street and a van pulls up in front of me, and I have to memorise the number plate and walk far around them because I think they might try and kidnap me. Also, whenever I disagree with someone, my brain goes u2018what if they kill them self, you're to blame if they do'. Even people who have shown zero signs of mental illness, my brain keeps telling me that they could at anytime. Or sometimes I'm convinced everyone is trying to purposefully exclude me. That everyone is conspiring against me to be mean to me behind my back because they all hate me. That everyone secretly hates me, no matter how much they say otherwise. They're all lying and they'll get up and leave one day, and they're only putting up with me out of pity because I'm pathetic, or they can gain something from me. nnI've no experience of any sexual assault, and non of this has ever happened in my area. Non of these people have mental illnesses or suicidal ideation that I'm aware of either. I can see everyone outside has a genuine reason too (eg, construction workers) and it's the middle of the day on a fairly busy road, with other witness around, yet I can't help but think about it. I've experienced some friendship problems in the past in regards to trust, but some of these people I have known for 5+ years and part of me is still convinced they're going to get up and leave one day. nnI know the thoughts are illogical. I know it. But my brain just keeps telling me u2018what if'. Like, I know they probably won't kidnap me, but also I need to remember the number plate just incase they try to. nnThey mostly occur when I'm depressed, and vary from minor passing thoughts to ones that are everywhere and consume me, but I don't know at what point it is a serious problem, as opposed to normal intrusive thoughts.
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It sounds like you have major trouble trusting people. Things like that generally start in childhood. Can you remember a moment when you were very young where somebody whom you should have been able to trust let you down?
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You know what beats my willpower five times over? 3 beers.nn6(usually 7) days out of the week I think to myself
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>on my meds I'm nervousnnSSRI's?nn>when I'm drunk I'm just like everyone elsennXanax does the same thing. I'm exactly the same way OP.
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I used to love driving and never get anxious about it. Now when I drive I am always afraid of accidentally hitting something or someone. This anxiety I have while driving seems to be making me have a lot of driving errors lately and feel worse about it. It has become a catch 22, i am afraid of making errors when i drive so i get anxious, and my anxiety makes me make errors when I drive. Has anyone else gone through something similar?
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I failed eleven times despite the fact that I like driving :|n
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My English teacher set a project to improve our oral skills and we can do a presentation on whatever we want. I thought I would be fine because I chose a topic that I am very passionate about, Lego. I am doing the history of Lego but I am legit shitting myself for that time. Any tips so I don't faint out of anxiety in-front of my class?
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I had a presentation on wednesday as well lol. As soon as I got there in front, all the emotions were gone, but my brain made sure to stress me out the entire week before. It didnt go that well, but surprinsingly I didnt overthink it too much. Nobody cares! Maybe that helps you. Even tho you may stutter or it doesnt go according to plan, keep in mind, they arent even paying attention to you and if they do they ll forget what you say a few minutes later. I was especially paying attention while others were presenting and everybody was on their phones and man do I hate SA for thinking otherwise
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For anyone who has watched Finding Nemo, do you remember the scene where nemos father takes him to school and meets up with the other parents and tries to tell them a joke? He isnt able to catch anyone's attention as he speaks unconfidently and messes up the joke and at the end, one of the fishes interrupts. nnThats how i feel whenever im around other people. I can't really figure out how to communicate well with them and its always like i either get interrupted or i cant really catch anyones attention. Even when i tell jokes i end up looking just like marlin, nemos father. Lately ive been trying to let loose and stop being so antisocial. There was a point in my life where i isolated myself from everyone and now I'm dealing with the consequences. nnWhat techniques, videos, seminars, books, bits of advice/wisdom can you guys reccomend? At the end of the movie marlin ends up being able to tell the joke perfectly and making the other fishes laugh and he's the complete opposite of what he was like in the movie. I know i can be that guy that people gravitate towards but i feel like im missing a piece to the puzzle. Im in my early 20s and i know this area of my life is crucial and mastering this will improve every area in my life.nnI just compared myself to a fish from a disney movie..
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I forced my self to get a job as a server. It sucks at first but personally I have improved over these past 7 months although my coworkers call me quiet still I feel like I'm more avoidable and talking to people all day makes you good at knowing what to say in conversations.
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When I start talking to someone I have something to say and I always mix it up because I get nervous. My words just get jumbled and I end up saying the wrong thing. I have a difficult time with annunciation too. I don't think I used to have this problem before when I was younger so I think it's social anxiety related because my social anxiety is at its worst right now. nnAnyways it makes me feel even more like people think I'm weird and dumb so it's not helping. nnAnyone have any tips or has anyone else experienced this? Feeling lonely ngl.
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That's ok. I do that all the time too. It can be really frustrating and embarrassing. nnWhen I notice that I'm messing up my words, I take a second to stop, and then I repeat what I said slowly and more focused. I think it's normal to jumble up your words every now and then, even without social anxiety, so most of the times people are empathetic about it. nnIt can also help to just explain to the other person that you have social anxiety and are nervous. Usually when I tell people, they're quite supportive and patient towards me.nnI think you're doing well. Keep at it
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I hate when people tell me they don't have friends but then i later on found out that they do have some, that shit annoys me so much
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I don't know if the two best friends I used to have count as friends anymore we don't talk almost at all anymore so probably me
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I can't stand it anymore i fell overwhelmed by nothing i fell sad alone and the probably of something changing in the future are small .They are too blind to see the pain in my eyes. I was always happy because i helpedpeople around me no matter how much pain they did to me because i was focused on being there for others and never had the time to realize how sad and crushed i realy am . I don't believe in god but i am still afraid of death, but for how long ,for how long because i feel like in a few days the sadness and frustration will be bigger than the fear of death. I feel like is already too late . I tried to be happy to stay alive but i just feel defeated . If somehow someway will drastically change the circumstances i will dust fell worse and worse until the day I can't wait to come when i will look at the thing that is holding me back and say
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Wish you the best.
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Hey guys. I've posted here once before, I believe, and now I'm here again. I was just wondering if anyone else did this or not. I assume it's all part of this sort of social anxiety or whatever it is that I have. Anyways, I talk to my friends and stuff, and it's fine, but if I talk to someone that I either just met or don't really know well, I often times do not look at them.nnI usually just look down at the ground or something, and everything seems fine, but if I think about it later I'm just like
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Yep, me too. Often I look in their general area, but find it hard to make eye contact.
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Hey,nnSince I have been trying to work on my social anxiety my anxiety has just becom worse over the weeks.nAt the beginning I was able to write with the people in the group chat but now I can't even type in one message at all. Everyone there is already getting along and I feel like a burden if I would butt in on the conversations there. nBecause I am still stuck in this akward first-time,getting to know each other phase and I feel like that would majorly disturb the conversation flow.nHaven't written anyone in the group for nearly one week now.nMy motivation to change is going down again and it is becoming harder to actually talk to people.nnWhat should I do here? Like do I need to change my approach here or should I take a break?
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No problem!nnThat's really cool that you journal. I've found it to be a game changed for my battles with social anxiety
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Hey, this is a cry for help and a vent at the same time. I started college this week (I was only accepted 2 weeks after the classes started) and I hated it so much because everyone already has defined groups so no one talks to me <33 the only friend I made had to shift classes and I've tried to talk to a few people but I ended up being excluded and ignored. The thing is that I think it can be easier for me to adapt to the fact that I don't have friends than to try and make new ones. If you felt this way too were you able to make friends?? Idk everyone says college years are the best of your life but I already want to quit ahahah please help me stop my urges to go to the bathroom in the middle of the classes to have a breakdown :'))
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I shouldn't be, not until I've atleast overcome social anxiety
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I'm scared af to start back at school. PE is hell for me as I'm always getting shouted at by my classmates for not being good at sports, I feel humiliated, the teachers hate me they always shout at me. nnHas anyone else been through/gone through the same experience?
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I hated PE in school. I too had the same experience and was always picked last. Dropped it as soon as it wasnt compulsory. I would stand around most of the time. I do alot more exercise than what I did in school. It definitely was something to work on after I left school to get more exercise done
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Dont get me wrong she's basically my closest friend ever,we're kinda like best friends ?but not rlly,,in a good way she isnt toxic or anything,anyways I'm like nervous idk uGh I was fine jn and I got reminded of it suddenly and my heart sank and I felt a sickening feeling in my stomach and I'm getting sweaty helpnnSomeone give me advice
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Well if she's your friend then she must already like you, so I don't see a need to worry about anything. :) Take a few deep breaths and take the pressure off yourself.
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If yall have any advice please let me know cuz im strugglingnIm supposed to visit family that i haven't seen in a while and they're in another country and im scared asf idk how i will do thisnI have physical symptoms that makes things a lot worse
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Going to another country?! That sounds fantastic!nWhat do you think could go wrong? You say hi, everyone catches up, eat some food, maybe see a site or two and take some pictures. And your done.
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Hi all a little background about me: nnThroughout highschool I was builled to a pretty extreme extent, I was kicked by girls, mocked on a daily basis and literally humilated constantly. I spent 6 years of my life dreading school every single day. The way I dealt with this was to be as quiet as possible to avoid attracting any attention, as most people start off doing. Then of course by doing this you become conditioned into this negative isolated mindspace and after all the bullying was finished I was left as an extremely awkward individual. I spent years trying out different drugs, diets and meditations to help with my social anxiety. Tried avoiding certain things and incorporating additional activities which supposedly helped. I am now 20 years old and I have above average social skills and little to no social anxiety. As a reference, just 4 years ago I was literally terrified at the thought of leaving my own house. Now on my journey I spent many years browsing social anxiety forums and reddit and most of the info there just reminded me of my condition and did little to help. So I'm thinking about creating a place where people can access the information I've gathered over the years and the experience of dealing with SA. This place will be a positive place to find all relevant info on SA and help others recover. Any thoughts on this?
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Yeah, bruh, do it. I know its probably therapeutic, but so much of this reddit is dwelling on the bad. Let's get shit done!
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Basically what I said in the title !nnPeople push themselves into situations again and again in an attempt to lessen the anxiety but it doesn't work because the underlying psychology hasn't been changed. nnYou have to change how you view yourself and how you think people will view you in a specific situation in order to have sustained improvements. And you do that by collecting evidence that people do accept you.
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I think it's called
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I've been feeling like this everytime I go out with a face mask. I feel a little less anxiety, maybe because I don't feel so exposed. Anyone else feels like this?
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Yess!!! Working in retail has been a tiny bit easier knowing people arent looking at my face and they are too focused on finding hand sanitizer lol
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This pretty much happens to me when I'm at work, but It's so awkward when someone walks past me and says something random like “it's so nice and warm over here” and I don't know if I'm suppose to respond or even what to stay, so 9/10 I will say nothing. I'll become nervous about saying something stupid and then that moment will remain on my mind for the next 30 minutes or so. I bet the other person thinks I'm very strange and quiet. Can anyone else relate and if so share how you handle these situations
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Good one
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I wish movies and tv shows creates more characters who struggles with sa
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Because one of us cant work in that industry because of this anxiety and being in media requires you to be social
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I've only ever left my house about 3 times in the past 3 months and while I really enjoy the lack of social contact I'm finding that my anxiety is becoming much worse. Before I felt as though I could finally function in society, I could drive myself to college and appointments and get things on my own but now I feel as though I've lost all that. I'm terrified of driving once again and I have to drive myself to an appointment tomorrow, just the thought of that stresses me so much. I'm scared of college starting up again because I'm worried of going through all that pain I felt back during my first semester. It's so sad to see all of my progress fade away like this :c anxiety sucks.. It feels like it makes life a thousand times harder than it should be
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I just got back a while ago, I'd have to admit that was the most stressful thing I've done in quite some time. But looking back at it now I'm pretty happy that I made it through, feels like a huge accomplishment
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I don't drink alcohol. I have like $10 in cents, (and coke costs $3) and I have to go to a bar alone because non of my friends are avail.nn.........I can't explain why, I just have to go there to see someone (who won't even notice I'm there but if I'm not there they will ask why and I dont have an answer.)nn...How do I do this? Do I just walk up to the bar? Should I sit on a table alone? Should I take my hansfree??nnidk what to donn&#x200B;nnUpdate: I went, and I saw the guy who dumped me. He came to sit with us and bought me my drink because he drank from it
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haha this did make me laugh!
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So umm I'm not sure where to start but I was talking to a new co worker for the first time and we were talking about her side business which is Private Investigation but specifically for catching cheaters. I thought that was cool and interesting and asked her a lot about it. nnWell during the course of the conversation her eye contact gets weird and she says she had a good intuition about who is and isn't a cheater. Cool that's a good trait to have I say. I'm kind of getting weirdness and start getting anxious. Well she says most guys are cheaters. I just go oh like yeah well that's good for business ha ha. She says that she is good at noticing people's breathing patterns. Which mine at that point are probably way off normal as I'm trying to scoot to my car. I told her I would love to see this as a show or something but I'm tired and need to go home.nnGod I hate talking to people. How was I suppose to prepare for that?nnNo I haven't cheated on my fiancee despite what some random coworker that I finally had a conversation with in the parking lot says.nnI wanted to say I'm anxious already at a new job AND talking to this new person who then uses my anxiousness as a proof positive that I cheated on my wife.
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I watch these Odd Man Out videos on Youtube, basically if you don't know, the premise is all but one are part of a group (like dog owners, Taylor Swift fans, etc) and one isn't but has to convince everyone they are and you try to find the odd man out. Anyway, I'm always like I could never do that because I look like I'm lying even when I'm telling the truth.
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I hate myself, I'm all alone, every conversation I had in the last 3 months was devaluing, I push my parents down, they drink alcohol to cope with the fact that their child is a loser. I need to get out of this house, I had traumatic experiences here as a child, I still can feel the bad energy surrounding me it won't get better if I stay here, it's chaotic, I don't get anything done, I eat bunch of shit. It has gotten to the point we're I stay up all night an talk with myself. I need to get out of here but how do I do that when Social anxiety dissociation and depression are ruining my life and I screw up any relationship that I have. I will be alone at New Year's Eve like I was at every other occasion the last 2 years. Would be a good time to kms.
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Thank you for the kind words. What would it help me if I am neurodivergent? Is there some type of other therapy method for it?
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I'm very sorry for a long post, but I beg, beg you to read it. I just need someone, I feel SO alone right now. I don't know if I'm falling into depression, but I've noticed that I'm currently feeling sad and broken very often. This was happening to me for the entire life for some short periods, but now I feel it gets worse. It's not that I can't get out of bed to do stuff or something, or I'm constantly sad, I have very very rare mood swings, like every day for few hours I will be happy and the rest of it I'm sad or numb.nn I wouldn't say I'm suicidal, but you will probably say I am, after this post, because I think that suicide is not a very bad option generally if you can't do anything, but I guess it sucks. It's currently better to me to live even miserably than to just die. (probably because of the moments I feel happy)nnI already coped with some of my insecurities, for some longer time I've struggled with them, but some are still there. I'm 19 and I think I don't look good even tho I'm really trying. For example my nose is big and ugly, and I've had some acne (still have them, but way less because I fought it with some skin-care, healthy eating etc.) Even tho I don't want to think that way, sometimes I think that's why I dont get close connections with people.nnAlso, I'm very bad with people. I don't know if I can rate my social skills. With the people I know and I love I'm talkative, but I'm just scared of new people. For example, it happens that grocery worker tell me something random criticising me I'm slow or something like that and it changes my mood and make me nervous or sad. My fear or new people is the reason I didn't post these kind of posts before, but I wanted. Actually, I did, but with way less details and in some comment sections, and people gave me 0 support (actually they were negative). I got 0 advice, just criticism. Also, in all honesty, I don't really like new people. I must know someone well to like him, but I don't like 90% of new people I meet.nnBut all that is not the reason I'm sad. It's just the way I am and I know it can get better. My worst thought right now is that I'm worth NOTHING. I feel non-defined, I feel that nobody besides my parents care for me. I have some friends, actually more than you would think for a person like me but I think nobody actually cares for me that much. I have no best friend. The best explanation would be that I don't feel I belong anywhere. I have a group of friends (15-20+ of us, and surely about 10 are my very good friends) and we play football often (now not that much because it's winter), but the thing that makes me sad is that there are some groups of us, like few groups of 3-4+ people that are
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Thank you for this.nnI hope too I will make it, thank you so much for your support. :)
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I see her every day lol
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My wife is dealing with a lot of same issues. No mental health people no how to deal with this. No one understands how everything like a light switch goes from great to terrible. Is there a group others talk on? Let me know. Good luck to all as I understand.
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I just hate myself so much because of SA. It has ruined my life. It is the reason I can't get a job. I cant do a job where i have to communicate with people, even the slightest thought of having to talk to people makes me sick. I can't even get to the job interview, every time i try i am a shaking mental wreck before I even reach the interview. my parents just think i'm lazy and I try to explain myself to them but they think i'm just using it as an excuse... I will probably be kicked out within a few years and be homeless too I guess. I dont know, I really just want to end it all. I feel like a failure and completely worthless.
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Sure, go ahead.
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I'm the middle child in my family, all guys. Anyway out of the three of us I feel like I was the most sensitive growing up. I remember one time I spilled milk and started crying, because I thought my dad was going to yell at me. Anyway he had a bit of an anger problem and he yelled a lot. Every year he seemed to make a new years resolution not to get so angry, but he always inevitably blew up. nnTo this day I'm not comfortable around him. I mean I love him, but I feel like I developed strong feelings of anxiety during childhood that carried over into adulthood. I feel like I'm always constantly trying to repair a broken relationship almost. Just wondering what everyone else's father was like growing up.nn
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My father was terribly abusive , mostly emotionally except he would never admit it. He was literally from nazi ancestry and had no idea how to raise a child, so he repeated what had been done to him onto me. I'm pretty sure I don't love him though I would love to. I always try to re-hash that relationship but it never works. He's a little colder than I, and I have almost undetectable emotions. I live very close to him and even work across the street from his work and I hardly ever speak to him.
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It hurts.. for the past few days, I've tried, contemplated on, on socializing on discord chats...and in the end, im still here. Still the same. nnAnother thing, I tried to talk and use my mic online, via Xbox. Talk to random gamers, but im still here. Still the same. nnIts been nearly 2 weeks I think.... of TRYING. nnMore like, not trying hard enough. nnThis whole social phobia or social anxiety is a fucking curse. I swear.
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1) two weeks is an extremelyyyyy short period of time. keep trying! 2) I myself used twitch chats for that. you can leave at any time, you can choose a stream with thousands of viewers, with hunderts, with tens or with no viewers at all, and try to interact with either the chat or the streamer. Again, the point is that you can leave at any time! And you won't be judged, cause on twitch people only see your username, not even a profile pic, and what you write. Also, it's completely fine if you decide to first lurk in chats (just watch and not type anything), for like a couple of months, before gathering the courage to try it out yourself.
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I feel like I wasted 30 years. Allowing my poor mental health control me. nnI hope I can turn this around soon :( nnRant over.
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I think society as a whole makes it seem like if you're not successful by a certain age then you've missed it, but that's so not true, some of us are late bloomers! The fact that you understand that your mental health has held you back and that you want to change is a BIG accomplishment. Seeing what's holding you back is the first step to figuring out how to start turning things around. Nothing is ever wasted, we can take something even from the worst situations and we can choose to see how each of those moments has prepared us for what's next. Make a vow to yourself that this year you're going to figure out a way to turn it around. That the last 30 years have prepared you in more ways than you've even realized. You can have better control over your mind, but it takes practice, and you have to train it, by speaking and encouraging it just like you would if you were helping a small child learn something new. I know that may sound ridiculous, but it's true. Ok, novel over ud83dude09 Happy birthday ud83cudf82ud83cudf88
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Voice chat has always been that one thing I run away from as I'm to anxious to talk to someone so I always disable it.nnRecently, I started playing Overwatch and I join the voice chat to hear if people say something. I will Mute myself, but I won't disable it.nnMost of the time no one talks and everyone is on the voice chat muted, sometimes one person talks to mostly themselves, and few time 2 or 3 people talk. I always enjoy hearing people talk about the game or anything, it amazes me how easy it is for them to talk. Most of the times the people in voice chat are positive and to this date I've had 2 persons that were toxic.nnNow, I don't talk in voice chat I hear to what the others are saying. But I worked the courage to talk for once. It went so fucking terrible I had to get off the game.nnIt happened in a competitive match where people try their best so I know some people will be upset if they loose. The match began and I joined voice chat, we are halfway through the match and loosing badly, we would need 2 miracles to win the game. I've been quiet as no one is talking and I can't be the one to initiate so when another one of my team asks if anyone has a mic I respond that I have. Inmediatly he starts trash talking me and telling me how it is my fault we are loosing, how I'm shit at the game and should kill myself. In my opinion I wasn't playing bad, and on top of that I'm playing in the lowest rank/division. People here are just as bad as me. So there I go trying to explain to him that I think we can work on something to change the course of the game when he starts to attack me and my voice. English isn't my first language and so I have an accent that he starts attacking. I just took off the headset, muted my mic, and ended the match before turning off the game.nnI feel as absolute shit and my self steem is close to none. I am sensitive, I overthink things, I think about every word that I say so that I don't end up in situations like this. I know it's just some kid that I will never meet, but I still feel like shit.nnJust wanted to get off this
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overwatch has become extremely toxic over the years and if you're on console, the addition of text chat didn't help at all. i would say just don't join voice chat/mute those who are rude or stick to QP/arcade because your mental health is more important than winning some games
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I (28f) went to therapy today after the last 3 weeks have been absolutely hell for me. Well, I found that I have fearful avoidant attachment style meaning that I crave closeness in a relationship but have a wall up because of fear of rejection, abandonment, etc. I am trying really hard to work on this. nnI have struggled with it all my life. I felt alone the majority of my life. I isolated myself. I didn't have a lot of friends. I was embarrassed most of the time. nnI know people like me but I don't let anyone close. I look for flaws so people leave me alone. nnMy therapist told me today I have borderline traits and stated that it's because I have intense emotions in regard to my relationships and I basically base my mood on how my relationship is. I would like any help with this. Please.
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Ok, that's great. That and giving yourself time are the most important things here. The only advice I can give personally as someone who has some wacky personality and attachment stuff is just noticing your actions in relationships and how and why you're doing what you're doing and whether it's something that is good to be doing based on typical or constructive behavior. Not sure if that makes sense but I'm tired.
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Hello,nSorry about formatting, I'm using my phone, and the fact that I don't post much on Reddit doesn't help.nnSo, I'm a huge fan of this band. Like, it's been my dream to see them for 16years now. Their music has been with me through so many phases of my life and literally saved me from myself multiple times. nI finally got to see them live last week, after buying the tickets 3 years ago and waiting so long for it to happen due to COVID. But, I can't really remember it.nI have black outs, missing moments. I remember singing along (to which songs I don't remember), I remember being happy, I remember one thing or two they did on stage, but not everything. And since this happened only a week ago, it feels strange and off to not remember.nnI've had very bad experiences before and have been in denial about it. Like I've been rped and it took me months to realize what happened and I still don't remember exactly what happened. I've done some serious fckups and I don't remember what happened or don't realize it for some time or ever.nThis feels the same. nnNow I'm sure nothing bad has happened during the concert as I was perfectly sober and with my husband the whole time. But it shocks me that I don't remember a big part of the event and I'm wondering if denial can happen about something positive and you're just super excited for and don't want to admit that it finally happened.nnDoes this make sense?nnTLDR : I've been to the concert of my favorite band ever, I was sober and fine, but I can't remember much of the event. Is it 'normal' ?
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You're not in denial. When we say someone is in denial, it means they know something is true and choose not to accept it. You didn't choose to have holes in your memory like that, so
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I haven't visited this sub in a while, but a certain guy named /u/ZFree2013 always used to do this and I thought maybe some of you might be interested in a revival.nnAnyway, my week was okay I guess. I didn't speak to anyone except my family, but on the other hand the Steam Summer Sale started yesterday so that's nice. Is anyone else studying for their exams?
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My friends had a cocktail party, so I went. It was my first time wearing a dress in maybe 10 years? So I was uncomfortable to say the least. But I went. I was so anxious, and one friend even shouted (it felt like shouting at least), asking why I wasn't breathing. Then proceeded to shove drinks in my hands all night.nnThe comment made things worse, as everyone then turned to look at me. By the end I was ok. Probably because I had a considerable amount of alcohol in me. But when I realized I could feel the drinks having an effect, I got anxious again because I needed to be able to control my speech and I was too anxious about losing complete control. So there was maybe an hour in there I was ok. But it definitely was a tough night.nnThe rest of the week was mostly solitary. And I'm mostly ok with being alone.
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During periods of stress, anxiety, racing thoughts, etc, I'll sometimes start to feel warm/overheated inside, kind of moist/sweaty, dizzy or out-of-it and just really yucky. So, I'll take my temp and BP/pulse and they are completely normal.nnOther times, I'll have all kinds of really wild and strange anxiety/stress/ocd dreams and wake up feeling like I'm in a daze. Sometimes the dreams can affect me for part of the day and it isn't until the evening when I feel normal again.nnOther times, during periods of anxiety/stress, I'll just feel
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I get tired/exhausted and a bit sore sometimes from being so tensed up all the time without knowing, mental exhaustion not just “oh I'm tired from work let's take a nap” nah it takes me out completely , also stomach issues out the azz (literally). However I have been able to manage them sometimes it just gets out of hand.
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So, I'm looking for anything really here - it doesn't have to be strictly about anxiety. I'm reading a few straightforward books about the history of anxiety and things like that, and I'm also reading a few books about spirituality and intentionality in the vein of *When Things Fall Apart*, but I can't help but get the sense that there's so much more I ought to read.nnMy cohost also has depression, so if you have anything to recommend to me that I can pass along to her, then let me know!nnAt this point, I'm invested in the podcast and learning for my listenership, so I want to be as helpful as possible. I'm fine with fiction or non-fiction, really! I guess I just really feel like I need to expose myself to as many stories as I can that aren't my own in order to actually encapsulate the experience of others. I have a cohost as well who experiences anxiety very differently, so I think we're effectively talking about different aspects of anxiety, but I'd love to be more versed overall and pad my knowledge. nnThe podcast is really more about creating laughs and smiles than anything else (and showing folks they're not alone), but I feel like it can't hurt for me to know as much as possible.
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Awesome thanks!
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I struggled with social anxiety for the past 10 years and I struggle a lot to look at people or talk to people . My eyes keep squinting involuntarily, i start shivering and really uncomfortable . For the past 2 years i was single but also pretty much anxiety free . Now that i finally found a girl i like and as it so happens a new job in a new town my anxiety is ruining me . I don't even want to see the girl because i know I can't look at her because my eyes will close for some reason . I'd appreciate some thoughts or advice how to manage being like this . As I'm writing this I am seriously struggling not squinting and fearing the next social contact with people to the point I'd rather hold my breath untill all i can hear is my own heart. nI'd love some help .
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Ok take a couple deep breathes right now. Breathe in with your nose two times then exhale. Now share with me, if your comfortable doing so, of what's causing all this anxiety. I'm sorry your going through this op
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I'll first admit this might be a little fucked up, nnnBut I started playing characters at work and extending it to other parts of my life. First off I'm a good liar so it was kind of easy for me. I'd pretend I was certain characters from movies or give myself a fake personality/ backstory to REALLY get into it. nnnI've done this for every interview and never been turned down, and managers are so happy when I go in. Problem is since it's not really me they get it for 2 weeks and then I'm myself and not preppy every 2 seconds nnnHere's the weird thing, I'd get so much compliments and customers hyping me up to managers when I played these characters. I'd have a different personality, use phrases I'd never use otherwise , it's SO FUN. nnnI also find it really funny to be a different person, today in class I decided to play into my awkwardness and make it weirder when I get there. I'm going to go in, talk in a higher part of my voice (without making it obvious) , and start acting more preppy despite being dead 99% of the semester. nnnIdk I think it helps with the anxiety, and it literally makes my family and I crack up when I've done it in public. I'm great at the awkward characters since I'm naturally awkward, but I definitley need to try more confident, social characters since it makes it way easier for me to socialize if I'm not myself.
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Thanks for this comment, it's nice to know it's not because I'm a sociopath! (I've always been vaguely aware that I do it and recently a coworker heard me talking to a delivery driver and when I stepped back in the office she was talking to colleagues about it and told me I might be a sociopath as my accent and demeanour was different to when I'm with them.)
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whenever someone gives me advice, they always say u201cyou have to push yourself,u201d as if it's that easy. i get their intentions, but honestly it's just really hard?? esp when you've had plenty of experiences wherein you pushed yourself in a specific situation, but it ended up badly.
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yeah.
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I only communicate with like 2 of my coworkers, and the other 90% don't seem to be bothered, which is fine as I feel at least I'm not adversely affecting people because of my issues. But then there are a couple of coworkers (all female, if that means anything) who seem so offended that I don't try to strike up conversations. Like I get I might seem rude, but it's not personal and I know they've seen that I treat them like almost everyone else so why the hell do they act like I'm targeting them?
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there's this one bitch who used to work at my place. she left long before I started, so while my other colleagues are quite friendly with her when she visits the shop, I had no idea who she was. And she made a complaint about me because I kept her waiting at the till, and she said I was very rude to her. I treated her just like any other customer. And that's what offended her - I didn't give her any special kind of treatment. Somehow being a former employee who is mates with other members of staff entitles her to special treatment. Bull. Shit. Try pulling your head out of your ass and you might realise being treated like a regular person isn't so bad.
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The most difficult part of social anxiety is the regrets i keep having while going to bed. The regret of not having a decent conversation with the girls i liked, the regret of having only a handful of friends, of wasting an entire weekend on a movies. It all just comes back while going to sleep. Seeing all the insta stories of ppl actually just enjoying themselves, makes it all worse. I wonder what life would have been if it wasnt for the anxiety i had since childhood.
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Yeah, thanks for the advice. I know i should be focussing on the positive aspects of life. But the problem is, a person with social anxiety is often too focussed on the negatives. Its like a constant battle between my feelings and my intellect. And often, the feelings win over, and the loop just goes on. ud83eudd74
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I been feeling so down lately because I have no friends in college. Currently in my second year.nThe only person I can only connect to is my boyfriend, but I'm so bad at socializing with others. And he already has new friends of his own. nIt's so hard to make friends when everyone is already in circles of their own and you're this new person in the room. It also makes me sad I don't have any circle of my own in general ever since. nntldr; No friends in college and no circle of friends ever since so I feel lonely
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I got a peer review in college this Monday where we have to group up and review each others essays. nnI can't believe it nnIt's gonna suck so bad lol
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Just curious. Feeling like garbage as we speak at a party. I'm new here..so. sorry if this is a regular topic.
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It's more like nobody cares about you but not in the sense of
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nhttps://www.mind-diagnostics.org/social_anxiety-test?utm_source=AdWords&utm_medium=Search_PPC_m&utm_term=social%20anxiety%20test_e&utm_content=85545497963&network=g&placement=&target=&matchtype=e&utm_campaign=7208757594&ad_type=mind-diagnostics&adposition=&gclid=Cj0KCQiA7oyNBhDiARIsADtGRZYVuhEjSyK-6TV10Ecs8xiPaoB6bwNfGgJ00p5JxwJ68XyXXnCxIngaAhJGEALw_wcBnnnFound a SA test not sure it's that good , wondering what everyone would score
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I was 39/72. nnHas anyone ever tried these services before?
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I just turned 17 around a month ago and decided that it was time for me to find a part-time job. I have been struggling with social anxiety for 6/7 years now (maybe even longer than that) to the point that I haven't been able to make a single friend in the past 6 years. So, finding a part-time job was a big and scary step for me.nnMy first day at work went pretty smooth if we ignore the awkward/mildly embarrassing moments. It's the second day when I, in my opinion, did something that was absolutely embarrassing. (I should probably mention that I'm working at a store that sells building materials.)nnSo, when we are working we have these little devices that you can use to talk to or ask questions to your colleagues. The only thing is that when you use it, literally every single person with that device can hear you.nnMy second day at work was yesterday (Saturday) and it was a lot more busy than my first workday which was on a Monday. Of course, because there were a lot more people, there were also a lot more people who would ask us questions. Since I just started to work there, I have no idea where every product is located. The first few times when someone approached me with a question I just said that it was my second work day and pointed him/her to one of the colleagues who were showing me the ropes of the job.nnAfter a few hours at work, when I was left alone to fill the shelves (cause the two colleagues who were showing me around had other things they had to do), a customer approached me with the question where the sandpaper is. I didn't know the answer to the question, so I told him the same story as I told to the others who asked me something. But this time, there was no colleague nearby. So, I said to the guy that I could try to ask my colleagues for help through the device and he said alright. This is when arguably my most embarrassing moment of the past year happened. I pressed the button of the device and said:
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Just continue going to work you'll soon forget about this
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nI'm struggling to study because of constant procrastination. Any advise?
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There is various reason for procrastination such as boredom, exhaustion, frustration, motivation, etc. Start by acknowledging why you're procrastinating. Understanding the nature of the problem that you're dealing with is very important. Try to understand why you're putting off things that need to be completed, and how you feel when you think about doing certain tasks. After acknowledging, try to write down your thoughts related to a certain task and see how you'd feel once you complete the task that you're putting off. Create a plan of action as it can help you deal with the reasons behind your procrastination. Simultaneously, remind yourself of your goals and how completing this task would help you achieve your goals. You can also break these goals into smaller, achievable goals, so that it becomes less frightening to you. You can set deadlines as they'll motivate you to work. After completing a task, you can try to reward your desired behaviour
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I'm not even sure if these are social anxiety symptoms, or if I am just weird as shit. But here they are.nn•fear of being rude to people or coming across as rudenn•feeling weird when laughing or making facial expressionsnn•constant hyper awareness of what your face looks like/what expression you are showing. nn•Worrying about making a misleading facial expression (looking mad, depressed etc)nn•fear of making too much/too little eye contact.nn•not knowing how to exit social situations properly etc etc. nnThere is a lot more but here's some of them.
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Yes, and not knowing how to start conversations either
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I moved to my current town nearly 3 years ago and I've still not signed up with a doctor. I did send in registration forms but I never heard back from them about a new patient assessment etc. My SA is stopping me calling into the place and chasing up my registration, I've tried for the last two days to either be on hold for ages or just simply been put down on because of a busy line. My only choice now is to go in myself but I've never been into the place before and I usually freak out about going in new places and no one's available to come with me. Should be simple right? Not according to my overthinking new change hating and phone phobia'd ass >_<
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Thank you :) I'll try my best~
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Honestly I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel happy one minute then I don't. I've never tried to hurt myself, but I've thought about dying. I feel so empty sometimes. I don't want to get out of bed often and when I do I wanna go places. I have enough energy to do stuff and I'll do it if my parents ask me. My mood swings are weird. I get supper depressed by myself (I cry sometimes but I've gotten used to it so I don't cry that much, maybe like 3-4 times a week). I hate myself but then another day I have so much confidence!? I act like I'm high with my friends (with my family I kinda do)I feel like people are watching me judging me constantly and I sometimes feel like I'm being laughed at. I feel empty like something missing. This is probably nothing and I'm just being annoying again I'm sorry if I wasted your time. :(
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Could be bipolar disorder, always advice you to seek professional opinions
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Woah.
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It does u know ur being dumb and that no one truly cares but u still feel like everyone is staring at u
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So I've had pretty bad anxiety most of my life, and I finally got medicated about a year ago. I take escitalopram 20mg daily and I found it really helped me and I stopped having daily panic attacks which was huge for me. And then quarantine hit and life sucks blah blah and my mental health got so much worse. My dr has given my quetiapine to take in addition to my current meds but for some reason I am terrified to take it. I have the bottle sitting by my bed and I do all of my calming exercises but I just cannot get myself to take the pill.nnAny tips? Experiences taking this med?
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I can only take a half of the smallest dose of this medication. It practically knocks me on my ass for 12 + hours, it is so sedating.nnWe are talking Zombie.... I use it sparingly for very severe anxiety periods.
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I have physical problems which seem to be connected with my anxiety (but probably not 100 per cent reason of my physical issues). I am thinking to try medications and I want to know personal experience if medications did help you with psychological problems. How soon your muscles become relaxed? Does heartbeat becomes slower? Etc.
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Well, it sounds promising. Thanks! I am glad that meds helped you :)
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I have Social anxiety,which made it hard for me solcialize,meeting new ppl,freinds.....nnAnd for the past years i was chasing ppl,i was looking for friends i was trying to be fake to my friends so they like me etc.....nnBut now i just came to the conclasion:i dont need friends,i need to stop chasing everyone and go on and accept my new life with social anxiety.nnSo now i like being lonely i stopped chasing
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same.
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Been a hard day, every-single-interaction has gone awful, feeling like a complete fuck up and questioning what is wrong with me!nnWhat's your go to thing when you just get so tired of the SA?
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Running and music. nnAlso, I have this self-guided therapy form that I use to check in with myself. Doesn't always help, but it keeps me honest with myself about how I'm thinking and what I'm doing with my life...
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I don't have anybody there.My grades are good,but sometimes i feel so lonely that i don't want to study anymore.I lost motivation in everything. nnAnd today,i came early to the university and i saw my crush standing with some dude waiting for the doors to be open(a guard opens the university doors).So i come a stand next to them.I try to say hi but i just stare at her (she also looks at me).We basically are staring at each other and i fail to say anything.So i just turn around and watch the birds near me.They continue their conversation.I pretend to smile and look happy,while inside i wanted to fucking cry.nnGod dammit i hate myself.
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So what would you be doing in a lap, if you know? Blood samples? Would there be a specific thing you would look for in genetics? Hah best part of growing up is not growing up!
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I feel like I can't really point to one thing but perhaps there was one. What about you?
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I think mine started because I grew up with evengelical parents. I was forced to go to church as a kid and up until I was 20 or 21. They forced us to sing and recite bible verses infront of the church every Sunday. I had to go 3x a week so I didn't feel normal from a very young age. I always felt like i had something to hide.nnOn top of that two of my cousins were bullies to me and one actually touched me inappropriately. We were both around 11 I think. I kept a lot of my feelings in and have never talked to my parents about anything deep. nnThen there was the fear of hell which took me a very long time to get over despite not believing in god. nnMy dad would also hit my brothers with a belt ( because that's okay according to the bible i guess) when they acted out and didn't clean their rooms. He never left bruises or anything but hearing my brothers scream was traumatic. I'm pretty sure my dad also slapped my brother once for embarrassing my dad somehow at church. My brothers would always fight so my dad tried to make one of them sit next to him and my brother pushed him away. I remember him saying sorry to my dad over and over. I got spanked a few times but i learned quickly very young to behave.nnI have a good relationship with my mom now at 25 except i don't tell her anything personal. She would ask me occasionally if i was a virgin when I was with my then boyfriend. I never answered questions like that cause it seemed like she was going to judge me. My parents probably don't know that I'm atheist. I think they just believe that i just don't like church or that I'm rebellious.nnI didn't know anything but church. My parents never even took me to the movies and they didn't want us to listen to regular music. I think just feeling weird translated into my life. I never knew what to talk about with certain friends and i never really told them anything deep either.
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Why is it I always ask the effort to reach out to people and they don't do it back. What kind of friendship is that? nIt's not fair nIt really really isn't fun being depressed and being the only one maintaining communication.
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Hey there, I'm so sorry you're going through a hard season. I have battled depression throughout my life too, and know how hard it is. I have not been alone through covid but know ppl who have been and it is such a hard road, and esp when friends drop off the radar. I feel like that has been happening some in my circles as well. I think everyone is exhausted by it and is battling with low grade angst as we all try and get through this. nnHoller back, and would love to talk.
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I would imagine the majority of those who suffer with Social Anxiety are introverted but I'm curious if there is any correlation with the MBTI type. nnSince there is no poll option I'm going to comment the types and you can just like the comment if it's your type. nnI'll also place a link to the free test if you don't already know your type.nnhttps://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
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nn
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By the age of 11 I was severely socially anxious and depressed. I spent my entire childhood/teenage years severely mentally ill, but my social anxiety wouldn't let me tell my parents. Even just the thought of telling them about my interests or expressing myself outwardly at all made me feel so embarrassed and ashamed, so there was no way I could tell them about my feelings or ask them for help. That being said though, I know that they knew. At 14 they found a text I'd sent to a friend about how badly I was doing and they said they were very confused, but that they were there for me if I ever needed anything. I have still never willingly expressed just how badly I was suffering to my parents, but they had a very clear idea from that text and they did almost nothing. As a 22 year old I'm traumatized by my experience of growing up with severe and unaddressed mental illness, and I am constantly torn between being mad at my parents and being mad at myself. I refused to tell them and I hid as much as I could but I was just a kid and I know I couldn't have been hiding that well. I don't know what my parents could have done for me given the situation but I know they should've done something. Does it even count as emotional neglect if I was trying so desperately to hide my emotions? How could they have helped me if I was never able to ask for help?
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I went through a similar thing, was depressed and had no friends as a teenager and I was too afraid and ashamed to talk to my parents. They never initiated any conversation about my mental health. I especially don't remember having any conversation about it with my father. It made me feel worthless, like they didn't care about me, like I wasn't worth to be helped. I too think it traumatised me and I always wonder what could've been if I just would have been more open. But I also think that they wouldn't have been able to understand it anyway.
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a Day of school or work takes a lot of social skills and a lot of stress, and when i'm alone i sometimes i suck my thumb. does anybody else do that? or does anybody know how i can stop it !
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That is not good to hear. Considering the timeframe you may also run into issues related to compulsive disorders. This would be an issue in the anal phase (I told you to not look into this anymore but just for ammusment's sake 1. is the oral phase 2. anal phase 3. phallic phase 4. is the latent phase 5. is the genital phase) Yes everything I laid out was written ba an austrian that loved cocaine which was legal at that time.
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Everything is in the title
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Clearly not, you're there to already know how to do it cos no one else going to teach you or do it for you. /snnIt's so annoying, why are we paying all these tuition fees when they seemingly expcet us to teach ourselves? I really struggled with programming, I'm not good at independent learning, and now I'm a university dropout.
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I am really lonely and i got nobody that cares about me please talk to me i feel so sad
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And why do you think people don't talk to you?
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Yes I have family and one friend and a boyfriend. I have some people around me. Having more friends would be nice but idk I just feel like I don't truly connect with anybody. Even with my best friend (and my only friend) she has others and I still feel like there's a void there or something idk. I don't think I'll ever find someone I feel truly connected to to be honest I think I'll feel like this forever. I don't know
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I can relate to you on this. Finding friendships can be hard finding emotional connections is even harder. Even though we value the friendships we have sometimes we have to keep looking for more.
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He views depression and anxiety as choices. Tells me I'm a stupid little girl, that he can't coddle me and I need to be a big girl, I need to stop being so weak, I need to fix it, just be normal, etc. and oh yes especially worse. It makes him so mad and frustrated. I don't understand it at all and he will never understand me. nnThey way he reacts makes me hate myself. but that's my fault. nnI just want support from him. I feel like I would be better off if I had it. nnI tell him off my (one) friend who is respectful of my struggles, and will notice when I enter my “so anxious i look spaced out and also can't look any one in the eye for more than a second, fuck it, i'm actually just staring at the ground or table now, and i'm barely saying a word” phase, and offer to change locations if were in a decent position to, but were planning to stay and talk. Example, having milk shakes and this happening and my friend offering us to finish them at the new apartment he was about to show me with his roommate. He later told me that's why he offered and I really appreciated that. When I tried to tell my boyfriend this, he said that he was “just a pussy trying to kiss up to me so one day maybe he can get me” and “why don't you go date him?” He also said that normal people are supposed to stay and fight it. nnAlso worth noting, I did receive a diagnosis of social anxiety but I have not been to therapy in so long, so I'm not using/remembering many tools to ease anxiety and fuck sometimes I need to leave is that really so wrong?
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RUN!
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I need advice guys.nnA little background info: I'm 25 m and a recent college grad (graduated in December '11). I was diagnosed with SA back in 2007 and it's been a rough ride. I was seeing a shrink years ago but rather than helping me cognitively I was put on medication. My experience with most medication has been bad. It either hasn't worked at all or worked very mildly and caused more negative effects than positive effects except in one case. I was put on cipralex in 2009 and it changed my life for almost a year. Completely smashed my SA and I've never felt better. But over time it's effect started to wear off and I was back to where I started.nnAfter a few years of doing nothing for myself I started an audio program in November 2011 for SA which I'm still in the process of finishing. I kind of feel like I'm taking psychology as a side study for myself. I've learned so much about SA and how our minds work and what exactly needs to be done to overcome SA. I've seen some progress and have had some really good days / weeks with the program. To give you a jist of it without going into too much detail there's an audio tape about a hour long you have to listen to each week and readings that are included that have to be practiced and read each and every day. Sometimes I spend an hour and a half reading these and putting them into practice.nnThe thing about making progress is that it constantly puts you on a roller coaster ride of emotion. You may feel great for a few days and then bad for another few which is understandable because I'm essentially trying to break up an irrational thought cycle that I've been using for the past 10 years. You're really supposed to see a relapse as a good thing because you can't have one if you haven't made progress. nnAnyways the last week has been a bit on the down side for me, every morning when I wake up it's a constant battle all day that leaves me tired, and mopy. I've turned down a number of interviews simply because I felt too nervous at the time. Being unemployed is also adding to the struggle. nnI'm not sure what to do at this point, I can't keep feeding off my parents and just moping around, and I also can't keep on fighting with myself forever. I'm tired..
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When I was in therapy, I had some really up and down times emotionally. One week, I'd feel awesome after accomplishing something, and then the next week, when I was too scared or unwilling to try something, I felt like a failure. The only thing that really got me through it was a combination of my therapist and friends. My therapist could see I was starting to get inside my head and over think everything and just kept telling me to not beat myself over it. She sent me a few emails over that following week just to check up on me too and remind me to try not to stress about it. The next week we slowed down a little and focused on my problem areas one small step at a time.nnThe main problem is, you probably have a negative mental filter that decides to show up when one thing goes wrong. You may have had 2-3 months in a row with great improvement, but one thing goes wrong and it's like you'll never get better. It's unfair to expect perfection from yourself and you have to step back for a second and take a non-biased look at your situation. I'm sure you've been doing great overall, so don't look at as if you're plateauing, you just hit a rough spot on the way to a better you. It happens, so just take it easy a few days maybe, remind yourself of all of the good improvement you've been doing, and then push through whatever issues you're facing. I'd also recommend sharing your situation with family/friends and trying to get some strength from them. Sometimes it just helps to share and get some positive feedback from those close to you. Best of luck to you. :)
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I'm a woman in my late 20s and I deactivated my Instagram about a year ago. At first it was because my social anxiety was so bad, but after a while I liked not having it anymore because there was no longer any unneeded pressure for posting my life, so I've never reactivated it. Social media just seems so toxic and fake to me, and I was using it to paint my life to be so much better than it actually was.nnIve always thought about this but today I mentioned it to my psychologist for the first time and she wrote it down as if it was important information, and it got me thinking “is it concerning to not have it?” I might be overthinking it, but wanted to get other peoples opinions on this. And will this effect my dating life? Because my social anxiety is already hindering that lol
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The only question you need to ask yourself is whether YOU want to use Instagram or not. Who cares what others do? It seems like you don't want to use Instagram so you don't need to.
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wanna try this to beat SA but only a couple of days to talk with people i never use to talk, any experiences?
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why? Its just 2-3 days to talk to a few people and feel more confortable. Can be that addicted?
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So my big sister and I are going for a drive later today and I want to tell her I am going to kill myself. nnHow can I do this?
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I think you need to reconsider killing yourself before you tell anyone anything. And understand that it's okay to not be okay and that you have feelings of wanting to die. But I would look for reasons to live another day.
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My dad touched floor polish and he's going to go in my room today to clean everything and I'm at work. What do I do? Hes going to touch everything and I'm so frustrated will I not be able to use everything? If he touches ny sheets I'm going to have to take them off and wipe everything down, does anyone know how safe this is? Can I wipe the electronics down with cleaning wipes or alochaul wipes? I'm so upset , tomorrow will be 24 hours so everything will be dry by then probably but I need to know how safe this is.nnIf he does this will it be safe to go to work? He might get it on something and it's not even dry yet. I just don't know what to do
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Well I don't really know what to because he washed qll my bedsheets qnd all my clothes which would be fine if he washed his hands after or ever at all. He's not letting me wash them again so there's nothing I can really do. Tomorrow will be 24 hours I think and it will probably be dry by tomorrow morning it's already almost dry is it okay or should i still wipe everything down? To be honest I'm lazy qnd I'm really not in the mood. If there is a small trace on my bed, will it dry just like on the floor ? Bc there really is nothing I can do now
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Years upon years of isolation, I've probably spent 80% of my life within the confines of my room. One untasteful or awkward social interaction is guaranteed to make me not leave my house or try to interact again for months. I feel crippled. For the first time yesterday, I have truly realized the shackles I carry around with me. The shackles social anxiety has imposed on me. I sat in my car helpless, crying because I am nervous 99% of the time and barely calm the other 1%. I realized how unnatural it is the way I am going through life. To be this nervous all the time. I look around me and people seem to not have a care in the world. They seem so at ease. Yea they might have other problems.. but they don't carry it around wherever they go. They don't obsess over how awkward or stupid they might look half the time. They don't have second thoughts about walking a certain way or emoting a certain way. I feel so alien among them. I have been so alone all these years that verbal communication is just an odd and tiresome activity to me. I can't even verbalize my thoughts anymore. I try to make friends but then halfway through getting to know each other, I run away. Because I know that I will be obsessive, awkward and anxious half the time with them. I know from past experience it won't work. So I always call it quits before it progresses. I self sabotage because I can't bear going through the suffering of it all. I don't want to deal with anxiety anymore. I really am so over it. I feel so unhuman.
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I completely understand I self sabotaged and isolated on and off for 10 years. You stop feeling real after a while, reality becomes warped. It's a really hard to explain feeling and I feel like only people who experience it could understand it. Obsessing over wanting to be normal but not having the guts to do anything about it. It takes so much effort to finally make the decision that you will not allow yourself to sabotage yourself into an early grave. All I can say is Therapy, Psychiatry, and little bouts of exposure is helping me. It's terrifying but you have to know that what's more terrifying is accomplishing nothing and having no one to blame but yourself. I wish you all the luck in the world. feel free to dm me if you ever need a friend.
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nHey reddetors am a new user here and it my first ever time publishing something here.pardon my french English is my 2nd language and its been ages since I've wrote in English so yeah nnnnSo am a big dude with 204 pound and 6 feet tall am not in a great shape I feel uncomfortable being shirtless around people I can't even change my shirt around someone because of my fatass and my aka man bbs (gynos) so I never went to the beach even though It's less than 10 miles to reach the beach I never swimmed for 3 years now cz on top of this I also feel ashamed from not being able to swim I never went to beach with my friend because of this nI want just to learn how to swim I want to go to a learning swimming pool but am to afraid to go idk why but every time I want to do something for my own self to be butter I get this feeling to push away the date that am going to do it like am running away please some advices just to force me to learn at least how to swimnUpdate :nI enrolled today in swimming lessons hope for the best guys
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My man you're 204lbs and 6ft you're not fat, body image is a huge thing for many people but going off of your BMI I'd say you're in relatively well shape. That being said it's a mental thing and if u wanted to shave a couple lbs off youre definitely capable especially while you're young. Just remember tho your weight, appearance or any of that doesn't matter it's about what's inside my friend.
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im in high school, my grandma live about 20 minutes away and i see her once a month maybe. i try and call a lot. i have a really hard time calling her because every time i do she starts to cry towards the end of our call. we could be having a total normal conversation and as we start to hang up she starts to sniffle and i can tell she's tearing up. it's usually like a few seconds before we hang up, but it makes me so sad and i can't help but cry after we hang up. it makes me so sad that she's crying. she's not old or dying, she lives alone and has for over 10 years but me and my parents and siblings see her often. i just don't know why she's crying or what she's thinking.
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She loves you. Can you go see her? Maybe take her a little gift, even a teddy bear or something for her to keep in her space and remind her of you
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.
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I just want to remind you, if you start trembling, turning red, forget what to say etc it's 100% alright. Just take a moment or even admit out loud that you're nervous. Fellow students tend to be more understanding than we give them credit for, especially if performing is mandatory. As long as you get through the presentation fuck it lol. It will (most likely) be uncomfortable but you got this.nnYou could also try to contact a teacher and ask if you could make a video presentation instead. Some are very understanding when it comes to anxiety disorders.
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My whole life I have been rather quite and reserved, since getting my first job my confidence levels have definitely gone up alongside when i drink alcohol (which I know is obviously normal for anyone). But lately i've noticed my social skills and ability to speak to people fluctuates, almost as if i go through phases of being able to talk to someone and then completely forgetting how to speak to which point gibberish floods out of my mouth. This is so annoying and lately i've noticed it happening a lot to me especially when i'm with my friends i just don't have anything to add to the conversation. like i said i have always been like this but since getting my job it hasn't really affected me as what it used to, but lately it's so worse i just get depressed and i just feel as if it's so much effort to hold a conversation. It's even worse when i'm at sixth form because i honestly feel like an outsider i just can't talk to anyone. any advice of how i could overcome this would be great.
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Dude I completely empathize with you. Some days I feel totally natural and all my conversations flow relatively well. I don't have a ton to say, but I'm willing to contribute new ideas and topics to the conversation.nnOther days I just stand around panicking in conversation. Whenever I do try to talk to someone I just feel like I come off as so weak and sad because I've been ruminating on my anxiety for the past 4 hours.nnHonestly man if I had solid advice for you I would not be on this subreddit and would be on r/chadtopia. The feeling will probably never go away, but I think you can get really good at limiting those days. Just don't give up and keep at it. The people who matter will stick around
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1-2 months ago I was feeling around my vagina and found a weird bump thing inside my vagina to the right close to entrance but still inside. I recently started having sex and noticed it hurts in that area kinda achy. I went to the dr, first time she said it just looks like skin and second dr I went to said it looks “very NOT cancerous” it's the same colour as my vagina and it's not big or round, but is still referring me to gyno. She said it could be a polyp but from Google it doesn't seem like that to me. I have bad health anxiety and I'm so scared it's vagina cancer. Now I have to wait probably a long time to see gyno and I want to die because I'm so friggin scared it's bad.
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Dr. knows best, but to put your mind at ease. I have the same thing in the same spot. I found it around your age and am now 47. It doesn't hurt during sex, but I do get a sensation from it that is not always pleasant. I hope that eases your mind a bit. I have health anxiety also. This time last year, I was convinced that I had three different cancers and completely went off the rails. All three issues were nothing concerning and now completely resolved.
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Hello~I (20F) have not gotten my license yet and I still need to go take my permit test but I don't really know how it works? Especially for walk ins. I'm sorry, I feel like I should know these things but getting my license has never been a huge priority but now I've been getting pressured by my family to do it. To them it's super easy and I would just go do it, but since I don't even know where to go or who to talk to, it really stresses me out just thinking of the fast-paced environment that it already is. The only time I've ever gone was to get the handbook and granted this was in like 2018, pre-quarantine so everyone working was short fused and the lady who pointed to where the handbook was looked really irritated. I guess that experience scarred me and I'm so stressed to go back. Any steps on what to do to go take my permit test?
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Thank you so much! I too hope for a nice dude to be there haha :) thank you, thank you!
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I come here once again hoping someone can help.nnI've known I had social anxiety and ineptitude for 7 years. This causes me to be lonely and in extreme pain. But I've never really told anyone. Not even my parents. I feel an intense need to keep it hidden.nnDoesn't matter how much I try, how much I tell myself I HAVE TO do it. It always comes down to the fact that I'm extremely scared to say it. And it looks like I'm willing to ruin my entire life just to avoid those conversations. 7 years have passed since I realized I had a problem.nnWhen I talk, it's always half truths, and even that destroys me. And, believe me, I know I NEED therapy and a diagnosis. I'd go to the doctor, but they'd find out.nnWhy so scared? I don't want to see them cry, or shout, or argue with me. I don't want them to know me/control me.nnI'm saying this now because I'm having a big crisis (the only times when I truly reflect on my problems).
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for me talking about it is really difficult because I might feel so shameful and pathetic admitting it out loud. maybe you should see a therapist cause that's what they are for, they are expecting it
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Hi guys, so I wanted to get some advice. I usually get anxiety around my bfs family. I'm okay with some people and i usually do fine but then with others I always get nervous and butterflies in my stomach when they come around. For instance, his younger sister and her boyfriend give me those feelings. Like I always get anxious when I know she'll be coming home or she'll be around. I think it's because with her my energy doesn't like her energy because she's very loud an obnoxious and annoying. And if her boyfriend comes over I get those same feelings. I think it's because I don't like the younger sister and I don't want to be around her at all. She's always a huge extrovert so I feel like she always overshadows me or anyone else. Because of covid, I don't want to do family gatherings even more. I prefer to stay with just my boyfriend. I don't know why but I just want him to myself because he's the only one I can truly be free around. I always feel so bad because I feel like I have to force my self to be an extrovert around his family just to fit in. Even when do try to, I still feel out of place. I feel out of place because people don't really make too much conversation with me. He is also Spanish so there is a language barrier. Sometimes I just want to cry because I feel like something is wrong with me. I can be so outgoing around people that I get along with and that I like but for some reason I can't always be like that with all the people in his family. Am I crazy for not wanting to be around his sister and feel anxious when she's around? Is it bad that I feel this anxiety that I feel? How could I overcome this? I honestly don't even know what to do at this point. If anyone could help me that would be great. Thank you.
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Thank you for the reply! I try to tell myself that it's okay but I just always feel bad because everyone else is really extroverted and comfortable but I'm the quiet one. I have to keep reminding myself that I'm trying my hardest and that this is how I am. Thank you again for the advice and I hope things get better for you too.
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TW for emetophobes.nnThis get together I'm supposed to go to this weekend is hosted by someone who just recovered from a stomach bug, and while I've been able to manage my anxiety pretty well lately this seems to be stirring it to the point where I literally cannot calm myself down (not panic level, but consistent and thoughts swirling and it's effecting the other plans I've got going today. Having phobia of vomit is not fun). nnSo, my question is: at what point do you allow yourself to cancel plans? How often do you cancel plans? How do you stop yourself from spinning when you really what to cancel if it's actually something you want to follow through on?nnAnd opinions on if my desire to cancel is warranted?
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Fellow emetophobe. I would cancel it and not even think twice. Norovirus can linger around in feces for a couple weeks after and it's just so freaking contagious. It's totally okay to cancel if you're worried about it.
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