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I've been banned from two groups without any warning after apparently advertising products, I definitely wasn't, I saw other people share their logos that they designed so wanted to as well.nI messaged asking if I could be un-banned and they literally spoke to me like I wasn't human. nThey were groups I posted in regularly and wasn't all my karma from.nI also recently had a question about dog breeding and funnily enough another fellow dog breeder decided to patronise me with questions as if I didn't know what I was doing, Bare in mind I've rescued dogs my whole life and doing one litter, whereas she has been breeding miniature daschunds for 20 years?! nPeople are so assy on here I don't get it. Do I need to change?
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Thankyou so much! Makes me feel better
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Title
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Shift all the focus onto my other various anxieties, probably.
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I cannot function like a normal human. I cannot “just go out and get a job.” How do you do that when your social anxiety leaves you heaving in the bathroom or trembling so bad not even clasping your hands under the table stops the tremors. I have no one I can share my struggles with. Family who'll never understand. I know just from sharing watered down snippets of my struggles with anxiety/depression that my family (in what I'm sure is their effort to help me) will skim over my struggles, minimizing what I've shared till I feel sorry I ever mentioned the subject, and then attempt to encourage by adding more pressure. Trying to help by saying: Everyone's nervous about interviews, just gotta put yourself out there! You'll never know till you try, you gotta grow a thicker skin, etc. or saying it was hard for me too (from the sibling who applied for jobs at 15 and got out into retail jobs when I couldn't even step a toe into a store without feeling an impending panic attack) etc. I wish my anxiety wasn't so debilitating. I wish to god I was normal and could continue this charade that I'm just like everyone else. I'd work in a dead end job flipping burgers, or take 12 hour shifts if my health would allow and I could just move passed this. My social anxiety leaves me so ashamed, I'd almost rather those close to me just believed it was because I was lazy or demotivated that I had difficulty going to school or apply for jobs when everyone else my age has already worked their first jobs and entered into a stable profession by now. I'm suffocating.nnI'm sorry, I don't want to complain when I know others must have it so much worse than me.
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Wow, thank you so much, really. I'll start fighting those thoughts, it's hard not to feel alone and your comment really helped me get a different perspective on things and negative self talk
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If I wasn't forced to be in social situations or interact with people, I think I would be much less reserved and happier. At work, at every instant I'm overthinking what I said, what I did and even things I didn't say or didn't do. nn:( I find comfort in silence at times but I know others find it uncomfortable and will try to fill that awkward gap with small talk. And this expectancy from them stresses me to try to find something to talk to fill the awkward silence too. nnMy coworkers also hold a monthly gathering to eat together and I've been avoiding it from day 1. They know how uncomfortable I am to eat around them and I don't know what to even do. Pre covid I could eat with people but now I cant. But now even eating with 1 or 2 people, I get so so anxious that I want to eat really fast and put on my mask asap. Also my current coworkers don't even know what I look like, they're also highly curious and it's eating me alive that I won't live up to their expectations too ud83dude14. I have started to hate my face and feel that legit everyone is a model and I'm just a mistake. Also when I see them without their masks, I just try to erase it from my memory cause that's not who I'm used to seeing. I feel like if we ever go back to masks off, I will have to quit my job on the spot ud83dude14. Everyone knows what everyone looks without a mask except for me, I refuse to let them see me but also I don't want to see them as well. I don't know what to do regarding this at all
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Thank you! I do enjoy the silence and I follow exactly the same phrase you do ud83dude02. I don't mind but I know that it gives off the feeling that I'm just cold. But thank you for that question, I'll use it :)!
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Will be starting it tonight. History of schizophrenia and bipolar in family. I have severe social anxiety and panic attacks unless I drink alcohol during the situations. nndropped 40 lbs in six month from 175 to 135. Don't sleep, don't eat. nnJust got prescribed 100mg of seroquel a night and that should help with increased appetite, sleep, and anxiety. Any one have recent personal experiences?nnThanks!
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I'll try depression, thanks! Seriously, last two nights I have been OUT on seroquel. 100mg. Second night even let me ignore my wife and dog snoring. Best nights sleep I've had in a long time!
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I hate myself so much right now. The University that I'm starting at in the Fall just called and I couldn't even pick up the fucking phone to see what they were calling about. I immediately started sweating, my heart started racing, and my stomach tried to kill itself. I just sat there frozen staring at the phone until it stopped ringing. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. FUCK.
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Oh. Shit.nnI was in the war? lol, months I'm not sure. Best of luck, my friend.
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So I have been wondering about this for some time now. To give some background information I have had periods in which I had bad social anxiety. I was the kid in the class that would turn red every time a teacher asked a question or that was shaking during presentations or refusing to do them. Additionally, I was always too afraid to ask girls on dates, talk to strangers or put myself in front of a large group.nnHowever, I have been wondering whether those symptoms were not merely a result of low self-esteem. I have had periods in which I was on an all-time low, not taking care of myself, not following my own interest, and having few meaningful contacts. However, in the past years, I have made changes to my life, I began incorporating a normal sleeping schedule, working out (especially running and weight training) a couple of times per week, eating cleaner, cutting down on caffeine, and doing things I wanted to do. And it seems that my 'social anxiety' decreased a lot to maybe even normal levels. Of course, I still get anxious when doing public speaking or sometimes in meetings and try to avoid karaoke but it seems that my anxiety has settled.nnI am not saying that this is the solution because my knowledge of the topic is very minimal, I was just wondering what others would think of this. Especially since my therapist is also not convinced with my theory
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I'm curious, what does your therapist think?nnI'd think there's a correlation but not necessarily caused by that. If that were true anyone with low self-esteem would have SA.nnA lot of the things you mention work on their own to improve anxiety, like cutting down on caffeine is more likely to affect your anxiety than your self-esteem. nnMaybe it's more of a chain reaction?
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So I'm on this graduate programme to enhance development and today I was in a group of 8 people including the instructor. We had ten minutes to prepare a speech on a quality you think is important. I chose being articulate because I feel I'm good at written communication but terrible at actually putting my thoughts into words, it doesn't help that I'm super introverted and shy at times, often seen as too quiet. nnSo I was second to last. Everyone sat in a row and I had to walk out and walk in and start my speech. My nerves were going through the roof everytime everyone spoke and they spoke so well. So when my turn came, I was so anxious. I tried to speak properly but ironically my speech on why being articulate is so important was not so articulate, lots of umms, repeating phrases and I was just hoping for it to end already. When I finished, the instructor asked me how it was and I said I was really nervous and could have done better, and he said are you always this nervous before speaking and I said yes.nnI'm so angry and disappointed in myself. Why is it so hard for me to be good socially, when for others it seems so natural and easy. Feels like everyone's always way ahead of me. nnAny advice for me going forward and recovering from this?
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Ok thank you sir or madame
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Can social anxiety really get cured like totally without having any left and coming back to normal?I don't know but the way I feel is maybe it can get better but I don't think it can disappear.Thoughts on this anyone?
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Maybe it will disappear for a while when I'm drunk? Haven't tested it yet
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right okay so I have struggled with soical anxiety for a few years, and have always noticed that strangers stare at me more frequently than what is considered normal, if im sitting in a cafe i notice different people staring at me multiple times, I've tried smiling back they just keep staring at me. I've been trying to figure out what it is that people are staring at me for but could never seem to figure it out, for the longest time I have been certain it's because of my skin, (I have clogged pores, loads of blackheads etc and have oily skin). Because of my soical anxiety I feel like it's because I must be ugly , or else why are people be taking the time to analyse my every single move you know? Anyone's opinion on why strangers could be staring would be amazing, and what might help me fit in :)
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are u thinking in ur head that they are ugly or just curious?
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I was just wondering if there was any correlation between SA and personality types. Im an INFJ. Thanks for commenting :)
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ENTP disregarding social anxiety
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I can still get the emotions or like know it but I can't feel it. Like a blockage or a void or wall in the brain. Can't feel stress anymore. Can't feel the prickly feeling and the adrenaline rush feeling. Can't feel tempature, hunger, sleeping. Like a blockage in the brain that stops feeling those things like before. Like a void once again. Me and another person are having the exact same symptoms we are trying to figure out if we are insane or not thx u
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I just had this a couple of weeks ago. I hadn't been eating or sleeping enough at all, and was just kind of numb and out of it without realizing it. I realized it when I was watching the news and they were going off about Delta in my area again, and I felt no anxiety (I have a lot of health anxiety) - like I could tell I wanted to panic, I just couldn't feel it. nnnYou two aren't insane <3 Your brain and body are just feeling a bit disconnected right now, but you're okay and not alone in this <3
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I have social anxiety when it comes to talking to females I always subconsciously think that I'm not good enough for them because of my rough pass with not finishing high school and my living situation right now I am 20 years old I live with my uncle and has a girlfriend and I don't think I could get a girlfriend in these conditions it's not like I am struggling I have a good job and I am working Towards bigger things right now but I just get lonely from time to time every time I think of having a loved one.nHow should I handle this feeling?
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I never heard a single person take issue with it until generation snowflake, which I assume you're part of. I've also never heard anyone complain about men being called males, which further proves my theory that it's part of feminist/snowflake culture.
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The world needs to stop asking this after people give an answer. Yes, I am sure or I would not had given you that answer. Now you made me second guess myself and I didn't need that.
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I totally get it when it comes to food. But when I offer to do something or say I am gonna do something, thats when I hate the question.
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Any body have any advice you used or know will help get someone out of a slump? I've been depressed beyond belief since I had Covid in July and I just can not seem to shake it.nI've been diagnosed and medicated for extreme anxiety and moderate to severe depression since high school and I was doing okay motivating myself for the last several years until I got sick over the summer, now nothing that use to work is working. Ive been trying to force myself to do things but my body won't do them. Sweep? No, I'll just hold the broom and drag my feet. Do the dishes? No, I'll fill the sink and stare at it. Go outside? Sure but I just go out there and sit just like I sit inside, I'm still depressed now I'm just depressed outside haha.. I'm finding no joy in anything anymore. I love cleaning and sitting in the sun and just vibing out in my simple life but Covid has caused me to fall into a hole deeper than the one I fell in back in highschool that nearly caused me to end it all. No I'm not suicidal right now and I'll never be again, I'm just saying this is comparable to my high school depression which was the beginning of my mental health history. Any advice? I'm an artist and not even picking up my tablet is doable anymore. My head is empty. I plug it in and just stare at the blank canvas for hours..hugging my cats bringing some joy but not enough to get me out of bed. I can't get myself to focus on anything.. Thank you for your time.
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I really do. In a therapeutic setting. I wouldn't advise self experimentation as I've had risk of the
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I don't understand why everyone looks down on me or looks thru me. It's EVERYWHERE. School, work, church, even at home. Why does everyone look at me like I'm not human? I'm just a normal guy, why am I so different?
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Then perhaps there's something off about how you're perceiving others reactions to you. It might just be that you're reading into things too much.nnWhatever it is I hope you're able to work things out and it's nice to hear that you do talk to a therapist :)
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TLDR : I am too scared to tell my friends the way I feel, if you have any advice that would be appreciated.nnnI want to tell my friends I have social anxiety, I want to tell them I have depression and that I've been self harming, but I'm so scared to, I haven't willingly told anyone about it not even extended family. I don't even know if my sister knows. I know my mom definitely knows and my dad might. But I have told nobody about the way I feel. I want to, but I am so scared they will hate me or think of me differently or something else. I always seem to find a way to think of the worst possible thing to happen and that stops me from doing it I guess. nnI haven't really even opened up to my therapist about anything either. I just hate everything.nnIf anyone has any experience or advice please share it with me. Thank you in advance.
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I think addiction tolerance is genetic, so be very careful that you don't begin drinking or doing drugs.
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Replying to texts makes me anxious. Most of the time I genuinely don't know what to say. I don't know how to carry conversations. nnnnI just replied to a text after 2 days. Is that too long? I know if someone left me on read I would not feel great, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. How long is an acceptable/unacceptable time?
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I recommend the same day but st night or if its a very late message do it on the morning of the next day. Everyone knows that you've already received and read it if you take more than 2 days, so it's seen bad
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For me it started in my early teen years
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Honestly for a very long while, I was taken from my biological parents by CPS and I live with my grandma and my aunts with my brothers now and I didn't say a word to my grandma or aunts u til I was 4 (was taken at 2 yo)
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I have access to a doc who is open-minded about treatment options for my social anxiety. What meds have worked best for you? What are my best options that have the least side effects? Not using anything prescription or nonprescription at the moment but I need a chemical solution to see what I'm capable of without SA
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Psilocibin. That's all that's really worked for me.nnHow open-minded is your doc?nnEDIT: Downvote why? (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychedelic_therapy) is a very real, very important thing.
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I wish i could get a job but my sa just don't let me do anything i'm so tired
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Boomers just don't understand how fucking hard it is to get a job nowadays, even if you are mentally healthy. When they were young, they literally just applied to the first job advert and got the job within a minute, the next month they bought a house and a fucking car. Now what? You are lucky if 1 out of 100 replies to you, and then you have to go through 10 interviews and rounds, just so they can say they hired someone else or you are overqualified/have too high expectation, etc...
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I really want to have some sort of resemblance of a normal social life but here I am nearing 30 years old and I have absolutely no friends whatsoever. The closest I have for friends are the co workers I interact with but when I'm not working I'm usually on my computer or working out. I always freeze up irl social situations and stay quiet when I'm out in public which is very rare as it is. I don't really go out other than to grocery shop or go to work. nnI find it super hard to maintain any sort of relationship as well. I'm not sure if its a kind of personality disorder or mental illness. I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and PTSD but I've read many stories of people having those diagnosis and leading normal lives but I find it almost impossible to even talk another person. nnI'm not sure where else to turn but I think I might need some guidance.
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Thank you for your input. I really do appreciate it. I usually end up getting ignored in these subs Idk why. I guess since I'm nothing special I don't deserve a response which I guess is fair.nnAnyways I don't really do much that could be done in a
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I decided to give Omegle a try because I need exposure therapy. almost everyone I saw on there told me I was ugly and someone told me to kms. now the tiny shred of self confidence I had is gone and I want to sit in my room forever :)
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If that helps, I once tried to bait people by putting a video of some kind of model doing a stream on loop bc I thought it'd be funny to see them simp. nI got “you're ugly”, “mid” “she ain't even all that” at least ten times
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How do you feel while using them as opposed to normal? Does it help calm you down? What about drinking? How would you feel about a girl you liked if she didn't do any of that?
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Smoking weed helped me realize how unhappy I was with my life. Quitting weed helped my take control of my life and start overcoming my anxiety.
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Separate account to get this off my chestnnIt happens so often where someone notices that I don't really socialize in gatherings and comes up to me to say
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Wow that's super lame! I wish people would understand that quiet doesn't equal rude.
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I know we regret a lot of things in life where we didn't pursue cause our anxiety stopped us. What is one thing though, that you wish you could go back and do all over?
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heh, i guess me and u are two sides of one coin
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I've developed an (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.greatbytes.antianxiety) to reduce social anxiety based on a study by the McNally Laboratory at Harvard University.nnnIt uses cognitive-bias modification (CBM) to train you to ignore negative stimuli that may otherwise cause you stress in social situations. CBM's approach is to change harmful thought patterns. Every individual perceives reality differently (e.g. glass half full vs. half empty), which is known as
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I'd like to give this a shot! Sounds like it might be helpful with my social anxiety! And it will definitely give me something to go over with my therapist.
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I'm having an issue with valuing my worth based on the tips I get from my tables, because it's a reflection of how well I served them. And I know I shouldn't do this but I still worry anything less than 20% (especially 10%) means I'm a bleh server. I just want know how to be better and how not to over think.
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Some people leave the same % tip every time they dine out, some base it solely on how well the server did their job, some the overall quality of their experience, some never leave a tip at all. These are just a few of the things people may use to determine a tip. There's much more at play than how well you've done your job.nnThere is no way for you to know what criteria a person uses when they tip you, unless they leave a comment of some sort. If you have self esteem issues that mind is going to jump to the conclusion that you are the cause of any lower tips... That does not make it true. If a co-worker received a low tip would you assume it was because of their behaviour?nnI'd be willing to bet you're an excellent server, you care too much about how others perceive you to not be... Try to be that excellent server without fearing of how others see you, and life will be much easier.
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i always tend to think the worst of others while thinking the worst of myself both at the same time does that make any sense
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Narcissists think they are better than others, that they deserve better than others, that everything they have is due to their own merits only, etc... they pretty much think extremely highly of themselves and believe they deserve attention and admiration, they also tend to lack empathy.nnObviously, to be diagnosed you'd need to see a professional and a narcissist doesn't necessarily have all these traits. With that said, it doesn't sound like what you described.
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(I posted this in /r/Anxiety before I realized this sub existed.)nnI have depression-related anxiety, and while my Paxil CR helps day-to-day and Xanax helps when things gets really bad, I still find myself extremely anxious when I start dating a new girl, and I feel that it's part of the reason that I've been single for so long. Due to my age and social circle, I use Tinder, Match, and OKCupid to meet most of my dates, and while the first date almost always goes well, I soon begin to get very insecure and anxious, get worried about how interested she is in me, over-think conversations or make assumptions about why she hasn't responded or isn't as chatty as she once was, whether or not she'll have another date and like the next guy more than me, etc. Dating should be fun, and it starts out fun, but I always find myself struggling to relax after the first date, and this impacts my behavior both in person and via text which eventually causes the girl to lose interest since nobody wants to date someone that's needy and/or insecure.nnCan anyone recommend ways in which to reduce this type of anxiety?
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Taking a mildly CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) approach here. Your insecurities and anxiety about dating are probably stemming from your mindset. Sounds like you view dating as a competitive and/or highly-judgy type of ordeal. While this is true to some extent, and while some people thrive off of that aspect of it, the other view is that dating is more of a fun/friendly/getting to know you type of deal.nThe perspective you should take is that you want to date someone who wants to date you. No need for convincing, persuading, playing games, etc. If y'all are going to work it will work. If y'all aren't going to work, then it's not gonna work so there's no sense in getting worked up over it. Hope this makes sense.
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it was like my second time meeting them and they kept asking questions and I felt like I was going to faint so I just asked to use the toilet it was so embarrassing and they must have thought I was being so rude :( I'm sad that it's like their first impression of me
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I had a very similiar experience a few months ago, I was late to my girlfriends graduation dinner with 10+ family members. As I walked in the whole room went quiet and about 4 people asked me questions and I was so put on the spot I just sort of frooze and mumbled a few words. After that I told my girlfriend I had a headache when in reality I was about to have a panic attack. She said I couldn't so I sat there and could barely string a word together, eventually as the night went on it got better but I heard her older sister say some mean comments which really shattered my confidence moving forward. I've noticed lately i've been a bit better, calling my friends often, trying to look people and hold a conversation for as long as I can helps. Don't let this shake you up, just challenge yourself and you'll be fine in no time :)
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I have physical impairments combined with ASD, anxiety and panic so I'll never have a job. Trust me I've tried. But I just wish I had a purpose, a goal, something to live towards. Heck something to *do.* I have these bursts of existential crisis regularly, but for like half a day. It's been 2 now and I'm going insane. I don't know what to do with my life, I don't know how to deal with my anxiety, I don't know what I'm supposed to do in literally any situation. I don't know. That's all the thoughts I have at the moment. I don't know and I don't want to. I don't feel like doing anything. Not gaming, not watching tv, not walking the dog, not even sleeping. My hearing's super sensitive again. I'm constantly feeling uneasy, nervous and restless. I'm driving me crazy and I can't do anything about it. I'm already on so many different medications, the doses have been upped multiple times, and yet nothing seems to work *all* of the time.nn&#x200B;nnI'm sorry I guess this has become a bit of a rant. But what about you people? How do you deal with existential crisises? Did you manage to find a purpose? Are days like these common for you?
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I don't know what else there is out there... I've tried different jobs, but being on handicapped benefits and uneducated I doubt that's the ticket. I've considered volunteering, but in my field of interest it's mostly cleaning which would be too physically taxing. School didn't really work out for me either...
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Hi everyone,nnI'm 23 years old and in all my life I have only worked for 4 months. My last job was so stressful that I couldn't go on after two months. I didn't work for almost 2 years now and I feel like it's harder than it ever was to push myself and make the first step to apply for a job. I reserve two hours a day to search for a job (I did this for a few days now) but every time I go through job listings the anxiety gets too intense (for example I think of all the things that went wrong and the stressful experiences in my last job) and after a few minutes I have to take a break. To make it easier for myself I try to find a low stress part time job (with as little social interaction as possible) for the beginning but I still find myself unable to make the first step since most of them still seem very stressful to me. I just don't know what to do. Should I just keep doing what I'm doing and miraculously hope that one day I find the strength to overcome my anxiety and apply for a job? This seems very ineffective though. Did someone go through anything similar and can maybe give me some advice? I would really appreciate it.
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I went through a very similar phase, but I'm afraid I don't have good advice. I was at a really horrible job and the only thing that finally made me apply elsewhere is that my original position at the crappy job was just not tolerable, so it was the less of two evils.nnAre you afraid of applying, or are you more afraid of being called for an interview and then maybe working at the place? For me it was all of the above, everything related to working and finding a job is so damn stressful. The only advice I have is to set aside time, maybe an hour a day, maybe half an hour, maybe even less than that, when you will feel really uncomfortable and anxious and still do all the things that need to be done despite feeling uncomfortable, and then reward yourself afterwards. If possible avoid any other stressors that day, try and stay comfortable the rest of the day, so you don't end up pushing yourself too hard.
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....I'm so fucking lost about how to handle it. Unlike me, she happens to be
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Seize the opportunity, she is someone that might be kind due to the family connection. It may be a dose of good medicine to have someone nice drop in and see how you are doing.
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I've noticed I don't really like giving hugs/physical contact unless I know it's coming. I don't mind it when someone really close does it like my girlfriend, but it feels weird mostly with my friends and family. I hate being tickled as well.
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Yup. I've gotten better at this, but only after trying. I try to be a little more
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For context, I can't work remotely for my job so I've had to be in the office all through the pandemic. Almost everyone wears masks here, and has their own individual offices, so it's easy enough to social distance. But today I had to sit in on a meeting with a group from an outside company in a small conference room, and none of them were wearing masks, nor my two coworkers who were there. (They've almost never worn masks through the whole pandemic). I feel so stupid that I was too scared to speak up about it, even when point blank one of them asked me later if I'd be more comfortable wearing a mask while talking to me. I just said
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Ha, that's a good solution. I can't help but feel they'd be kind of people to joke about it:
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I feel pretty stuck, I can feel another panic attack brewing and I don't know what to do to avoid it happening again. I'm feeling both numb and frozen, but also with mounting anxiety and I'm not sure what to do.nnLast time this happened I almost dropped out of grad school and I tried to quit my jobs and ended up really damaging aspects of my personal life. I'm not sure what to do anymore
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Well.. first I would say that it's a sign of growth that you are aware of the signs that it's coming on and you can take steps to work on it. If it is causing you regular and repeated distress in your life, you may have an anxiety disorder. I would recommend seeking out counselling and possibly getting an assessment. Wish I had more advice but the assessment will help determine a direction moving forward. Best of luck.
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i wanted to eat a chocolate a couple hours ago when i was in the market, i asked my mum if i could buy one, she agreed but only if i go and ask for it. I COULDNT DO IT. anyway after that i came back home and i decided that I'll go to a supermarket where i wont have to interact with a lot of people with my dad. My dad told me that we'll go there but instead TOOK ME SOMEWHERE ELSE, I became even more anxious because it was unexpected and then he started shouting at me in front of the shop owner. I'm still shaking even though it wasnt that big a deal. I constantly get shit from my family about my anxiety, they tell me how it's just
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I just cracked a open my vodka. Prost!
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Hi everyone, so I've been struggling with bad anxiety since freshman year of college. I graduated college in 2019 and am now applying to graduate school. My anxiety comes and goes in phases but ever since COVID hit, I've been struggling with crippling anxiety and driving to work and going to work is becoming impossible. Doing schoolwork and other things seems so hard. I finally made a doctors appointment to get help and she prescribed me Zoloft/ sertraline. I feel absolutely awful after only 5 days on this medication and am having strange side effects. I only take 12.5 mg (25 pill cut in half) so it's weird this little of an amount causes this much trouble. nnI take it at night and develop horrible headaches and nausea. I feel so jittery and spaced out like a weird out of body experience during the day and have gotten awful panic attacks. One day it was so bad I had to call my sister who lives over an hour and away and she had to sit with me while having a terrible panic attack and then drive me to work the next day to work a few hours. I feel like I've gone into a darker hole that feels like it won't end even though I know somehow it will. Anyways, I can't go on like this and have to function and go to work so I called my doctor and asked what to do. nnShe said to go up on the pill and I just don't see how that's possible. How could she want me to go up if I'm already feeling like this. I thought maybe she would try a different med with me and her decision to go up on the dosage seems scary. I don't want to miss anymore work as I've already called out a few times and I know that if I changed dosage the symptoms would be more. nnMy question or asking for advice would be had anyone on Zoloft experienced the same things I am feeling and did it get better? Trying to make the decision to 1- either stop it all together 2- wait until next weekend when I'm off work to increase the pill dosage and see what happens. Any advice helps, TIA!nnEDIT: Hi everyone, it's been about 3 weeks since I have written this post. I would just like to give everyone an update. I ended up stopping the medication because it was just making me worse and I was getting sicker. I tried and couldn't handle it anymore. I had to function and was not able to. My doctor has switched me to buspirone and so far it seems to be working. The plan is to try out this medication and if it does not work, she would give me Xanax as needed. I have had some side effects but nothing like the Zoloft and things seem to be looking up some. I just wanted to thank everyone for the advice and encouragement.
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In my experience, Zoloft created restless sleep which caused me to feel awful during the day. It's a little stimulating, so, unless you sleep like rock, you're probably sleeping less. For some people, the stimulant effect compensates for the unmet need to sleep. But maybe not you. If you're issues are only about anxiety, ask them about buspar. It addresses anxiety only. Depending on the dosage, it's a fairly mild drug though, so may not be enough. Understand and work on your sleep. It's the foundation for all mental health.
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Teenage going to end. And I never tried earlier due to nervousness and religious reasons. Now, am having trouble making good real friends due to declining social skills, and about getting a girl friend seems impossible now.
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How bad is your social anxiety? When I was in high school, I didn't have anxiety but I was very insecure about how awkward I was and my inability to chat up girls whenever I wanted. During my clubbing phase, I tried a bunch of things because there were lots of women whom I'd never meet again to practice and learn. I realize you're quite young but let me give you an idea of what I tried.nnI learned that silence isn't always awkward, it takes two to make it awkward. If you feel comfortable and smile confidently while starring at the other person, they will feel the need to start talking (honestly try it next time you have a silent moment, it really works like a charm). I also tried talking to many people in the club before hitting up girls, I tried hitting up a single girl, group of girls, chatting up girls outside, complimenting them, asking them to dance, ignoring them. There are many things I tried but the most important part is having fun with it. I got rejected beyond belief but I've also had success too.nnIt's also easier to practice in a social setting where people want to be social so that you can easily walk away and talk to someone else if things go wrong. If talking to strangers in general is your issue, try to learn what your strengths are. When you are comfortable socially, how do you articulate? Do you like to crack jokes? Are you a story teller? Do you like to talk about random facts or share what you've learned? Do you like to talk about sports or something else mainstream or something niche? From there, practice steering the conversation towards your strengths. Whether that gets people engaged to talk or listen depends on how you articulate and with what emphasis you express yourself.nnThis will lead to you discovering yourself at a level you never knew you could. Best of luck to you in your journey.
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So a few days ago I saw on TikTok some random Russian girl and I thought she was very pretty and I just got hooked and wanted to know the girls name. And the first few minutes I didn't know who she was until I did a little research and I wish I didn't. Now I probably need to say I am a 14 year old male (introvert) and I never had a girlfriend. So anyway back to the girl, her name is Rina Palenkova. Russian 17 year old girl who passed back in 2015. Normally I ignore this stuff (I don't really mind nasty stuff in general). But this one really hit me, I don't know why but maybe she was the first girl I found actually pretty. So the last few days I was feeling actually shitty and couldn't think about anything else than her (and yes I know its sick and I don't like myself for it ). I have been thinking like what would I do if she didn't do what she did or how badly I would want to save her if I could. Now keep in mind I never knew this girl or heard or seen the girl in real life. Anywhere I go I just picture her there and start to feel shitty again and its driving me crazy and sad at the same time. I am not any kind of psycho or have some sick fetish or anything like that (I never pictured anything intimate). Whenever I go somewhere it feels really depressing like my life had no meaning without her. And I want to ask if someone had similar experience with stuff like this and how did you get out of this state.
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You got a little crush after seeing a pretty girl and found out something sad happened to her which made you upset, it's normal. Don't stress it, the shitty feeling will pass. nnAnd try not to worry too much about being an introvert and not having a girlfriend. You'll gain confidence and find someone when the time is right. When I was your age, most of the boys were the ugliest little trolls, and all of them got so much better looking and more confident with age. One of the most weird and undateable kids I went to middle school with is now super handsome and dating a model, so I promise you it gets better lol. Just hang in there, kid!
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She laughed when i said i have anxiety and said other people have more stress than me. Thanks mom
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thx bro, hope tmrw will go well. Have a great day too!
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I've been reading through this sub and it seems most people have anxiety symptoms because of thoughts running through their head or concern of what others think of them or other
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I spend time alone after to recharge.nnI don't really have a way to treat it yet because of how bad the anxiety is. I'm not that far yet so I can't really give advice on how to get through it.nnOther then I take long breaks after
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Hey guys, I need some advice. I have had the worst social anxiety I have ever felt in my entire life around women recently. Literally the second one starts talking to me I feel my breath get shallow, face get red, and I choke on my words. I have never had this before...struggled a lot with it as a kid but out of nowhere several weeks ago popped back up worse than ever. Some facts about me: I am 20 years old, consider myself to be very attractive (and know I am because girls have told me so) and am in very good shape. I have had a serious girlfriend in the past who I lost my virginity to. I am so confused why I feel so awkward around women recently. With other men, no problem, I am totally comfortable talking. But with women the second I start to speak I choke up and feel so vulnerable. I had a girl come up to me in the gym today and compliment my physique and I just responded
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There are other treatments including medications but studies have found that CBT is the most successful treatment for the majority of people. Only thing better is CBT with medication but if you can avoid the medication that's better .. no side-effects. And don't feel bad 12% of people suffer from social anxiety at some point, so it's not like you're weird or anything!
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I had to do some public-speaking today, where I was expected to deliver a presentation in front of the class. And I messed up. I had the option to do it in front of the teacher only, but decided to take the harder route because I wanted to u201cimprove my social skillsu201d by taking myself out of my comfort zone. It was the worst decision because I initially felt so confident about it but didn't think about what would go wrong. I only managed to say a few words that came out so shaky, before I had to abruptly end the whole thing without even finishing the speech I planned. I forgot everything I had to say and I'm just so disappointed at myself. The presentation didn't last more than 30 seconds and it was actually meant to be a 3-minute one. I'm so embarrassed because mine was the WORST out of everyone's and they know it. I just need to rant because I actually thought I was starting to overcome my social anxiety but it turns out I was obviously wrong.nnEdit: Thank You so much everyone for being so supportive! It really means a lot to me!
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I'm so proud of you for trying, even if it didn't work out how you'd have liked! ud83dudc9c Bravery isn't being unafraid of something, it's being willing to try even if you're scared as hell. nnWe all have our setbacks sometimes, but in terms of social anxiety, being willing to put yourself out there is always a win!
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How do you know that your social anxiety is too serious to the point that you need medicine
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How much did they help and does it reach a point where you don't need them anymore or are they a lifetime medication
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If I sleep 5-5.5 hours max each night, I feel better, have more energy, am less anxious and am far more socially fluent than I normally am.nnAnyone have the same effect? I once spent a week sleeping only 5 hours each night and I felt everything during that week went amazing. I didn't even suffer from the lack of sleep.
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When im tired I feel awkward and not motivated to speak to people, but did notice when I wad really tired at like 4 in the morning wasn't anxious at all, probably cause I had time to break the ice and get really comfortable with everyone I was with
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Has anyone else had this issue? nI also hate flying alone.
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Happened to me, 30 years ago and the airline was very nice about it, reassured me it was not uncommon, and put me on the bext flight with no hassle or change fee. I think that was Northwest Airlines.nnExcept for that one incident, I have always been a relaaxed and fearless flyer. For some reason I latched onto the idea that that particular flight was destined to crash. Of course, it did not.
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I think I have a touch of agoraphobia I can go out and everything but when I do I am like I want to go home I don't like it here.
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Yes, that‘s absolutely possible and normal. Always depends on the trigger/cause.
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Whenever I'm in a store or something my anxiety sky rockets and I can hear people whispering or talking about me. I hear things like “look this guys crazy, look at this psychopath” Idk if i'm making it up or people are actually whispering about me. I sorta think I'm hearing people talk and then my anxiety is twisting heard convos and i'm filling them in w my insecurities. Idk if this makes sense, can anyone relate?
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it's unbearably uncomfortable sometimes
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I think human interaction naturally invites for conflict (taste, opinions, interests...). It's inevitable.nnIn a way it makes sense if the inconscious mind try to keep social interaction to a minimum. After all humans are the most dangerous species there is.nnThe thing is, for a long time I wanted to be social and avoid conflicts at the same time. Which doesn't make any sense.nnSooner or later there will be misunderstandings, arguments, positions you have to defend...etcnnThere is a local proverb that says something like :
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I like your last sentence, i'm going to follow that too...I will also engage/invite even if that opens the door to awkwardness. Thank you!
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I feel like the main reason why is so hard to socialize with social anxiety is those memories ( at least for me) whenever I'm about to meet new people or to be in a social situation I remember all the times in the past in which I've said something stupid and ruined everything before and it makes me feel like is just gonna go exactly like that again. I feel like if I could just forget all those times I've failed at social interaction I would not have social anxiety anymore ( or at least it would not be that bad). nnnSo that makes me wonder, if you could delete all those bad memories would you? or do you think there might be some value in having experienced all that?
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This makes sense, but no. nnYou would just continue the cycle. You could erase your memory, sure, but your present day self would still find a way to screw it up. You need to learn from your original failed social interaction in order to change.
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Hiding in bathroom. Hopefully no janitor comes here again lol. So far everythings been calm here, no anxiety or anything I feel at peace. And I won't be having to feel like a waste of space anymore at gym because these seniors who made fun of me for being frozen and the volleyball hitting me.nnupdate: i think i made a new friend in the bathroom but i never got to ask her namennupdate 2: ok this the 3rd day but this time im not skipping cause i get paranoid about getting caught so yeah here i am in PE now I still hate it. Maybe I'll skip 1-3x a week
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I got lucky pe's my last class of the day, it's tempting to just never show up
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Fucking downvotes... they fuck me up. I'm past social anxiety for the most part, but I still get it, in the place where it should be the safest. I hate my fucking glowing inbox telling me there's 9 replies of 9 angry dudes probably mocking my downvoted comment, telling me that my post is a piece of shit, even if it was thoughtfully written.nnEvery fucking time I gotta head to r/sucidewatch, read the story of someone who has it real bad right now (not like I don't, oh well), concentrate on that miserable person who's been left by a wife, or raped, or just holding a gun to his head right now, and say to myself
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Voting from profiles actually has no effect. The reddit admins confirmed this one. It's to prevent butthurt people from mass-downvoting every comment made by a specific person.
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I know a lot of people that have social anxiety but aren't actually awkward at all. It's all in their heads. But I, on the other hand, make every fucking situation awkward and I don't know how to stop. I say things that don't even make sense and I stutter a lot and mix up words in sentences. My whole aura is awkward and also just the things I say. I hate it, I have moments where I think 'why the fuck did I say that, what did that even mean, that didn't make sense' and where that's a 100% justified because what i say just don't make sense but I can't think under pressure. Honestly this makes me so depressed and I hate it. I also nervous laugh after every sentence and I also don't know how to stop that. Can anyone relate because I'm just so done right now :( Also I'd like to add that what I say doesn't make sense/I stutter/mix up words, even in simple conversations that don't require thinking. Like what is wrong with me :(( another edit: I feel like other people with SA are afraid to talk and don't talk a lot, and I feel that too a little bit, but I do talk a lot but it's just awkward things coming out of my mouth while talking. I have more anxiety afterwards about how awkward I was when I talked, and also a lot of anxiety when I'm talking (which is why I say stupid things), and less anxiety before I started talking. If that makes sense lolnnnThanks everyone for all the comments. It made me feel slightly better about myself and gave me a bit more motivation to work on my SA. I wrote this yesterday in despair after having messed up yet another conversation and I didn't check what I wrote so I apologize if it's not coherent/I made mistakes in my writing.
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What do you mean? English is not my native language.
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I pretend to be relaxed at the supermarket because I think it's embarrassing to be. I'm afraid to look at other people and I can feel the sweat itch the roots of the hair on my head. nnNow I don't usually turn to alcohol for anxiety. But when I'm intoxicated I (~obviously) don't have any issues. nnI'm wondering where on the scale the average person normally lays. Between me normally and me when I've had a few drinks.
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For me, I am completely calm if it's a normal day. No anxiety, no stress, no fear.nnAfter I've left, I don't remember a single person I'd seen, usually. So I know that whatever I do, or whatever I look like, they're probably not going to remember me either. (Unless I have done something extraordinarily standout.)nnI usually just go about my business, meander the aisles. Apologize if I accidentally pull my buggy out of an aisle too fast, or say excuse me when I'm moving past someone.nnnIf it's like.... Christmas eve and the store is overcrowded, I get worked up. But more from a frustration thing than an anxiety thing
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I woke up today feeling a little more anxious than usual. I went to school (currently enrolled in university), was waiting outside class scrolling my phone. I was already in my head that people are staring at me and probably judging me. Maybe the way I'm standing, maybe the way I'm holding my phone, maybe from the outfit I'm wearing today, maybe they can tell that I am feeling anxious right now. These intruding thoughts happen occasionally. Sometimes I catch myself and reassure my mind that these things aren't true and reaffirm with positive words. Then down the hall I heard a professor greeting a student and they got to talking. I realized I recognized the voice of the professor, one that I had last semester and he's been one of my favorites so far. I really admire him as a person as well as a professor. He has such an easygoing and charismatic personality which I already tend to find intimidating with people because I wish I could embody this same personality in every social situation. As he was finishing up his conversation with this guy down the hall and made his way down walking right towards me, I continued looking down at my phone trying to play it casual but my heart was beating out of my chest. The intruding thoughts made their way through, “What if he wants to talk and I say something stupid or sound stupid?” “What if I stutter” “What if these people in the hallway can hear our conversation and hear me sound stupid” “What if I have nothing to add to the conversation” “What if he thinks I'm an idiot”, etc. So many goddamn discouraging thoughts and feelings in that moment but I still mustered up the courage to look up and say “Hey Frank!” He recognized my face (which made me very happy considering the class I had with him consisted of around 150-200 people) and we talked a little. I felt tense with my smile and my movements, even my responses were quick and dry because of how anxious I felt, especially with everyone else around. I felt inauthentic and lacking of my true personality and after he ended the conversation with “Really nice seeing you, have a great class.”, I stood there shaky. I got lost in my head, feeling sad I didn't add more to the convo. Replaying it back in my head and thinking “what if he thinks this is the real me”, “what if he thought I was disinterested in that convo and what he had to say” “I really wish I could somehow explain myself that I'm just so goddamn anxious”. This story went on much longer than I intended and I really appreciate anyone that took the time to read this. Ultimately, I want to learn how to combat or work with these emotions and thoughts that arise in moments of anxiety. I want to learn how to be kinder to myself so that I don't feel like times like these are a huge failure. I want to learn whatever tools and techniques people are willing to pass my way. I really want to overcome my extreme social anxiety so that I can just be myself and be happy.nnnTldr; Had a quick interaction with a professor I really admire and respect. I felt so anxious leading up to our convo, and resulted in me feeling that way in our convo so I felt tense in my movements and my speech. Feel as if my true personality didn't shine through and I hate it because this happens in a lot of social situations. Replayed our interaction back in my head afterwards, lots of negative emotions and thoughts towards self arise. Searching for ways to not feel like a personal failure after times like these. Also how to help myself to the moments leading up to social interactions and during, especially when my anxiety is at an all time high. nnThank you to anyone and everyone who responds to this!
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I think you did better than you think. It's totally fine to be nervous and kind of lose basic speech skills during an impromptu meeting. I'm sure the professor is used to seeing his students feel caught off guard outside of the room. nnIt's ok to have these thoughts of failure as long as you forgive yourself and laugh it off a little at the end of the day. Treat yourself with the same kindness as you would anyone else. If you can't be nice to yourself than you can't really be genuine in your interactions with other people. The guard you built up will always be blocking you.
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why is saying this (or a variation like “you're so quiet i didn't even notice you were there” or “didnt know you could talk”) socially acceptable? even though in a way im glad people dont notice me much because i dont want to be perceived by anyone, it still hurts and is rude. also on the flip side, saying “you're so loud” or “you talk too much” is considered rude. doesn't make sense to me.
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Fuck people man I'm glad I found people who have lived THE EXACT SAME experiences as me.
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I have pretty mild SA and I am really just looking to make a few friends. Is alcohol a good idea to help so that I can socialize easier or will it only make my depression worse? I don't plan on binge drinking or anything, just a few drinks to loosen myself up. I have only drank a few times before (before I had depression).
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it can go both ways. hangovers increase anxiety in a lot of people. not only is it a physiological thing but also if you have a few and do or say something embarrassing you're going to feel even worse. as others have said, this is a slippery slope so be careful.
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So I was looking for a way to stop social anxiety, and I came across NoFap! And one of the benefits of not orgasming to any nontangible item such as porn (you can still have sex with a real girl) was increased testosterone and so I assume increased confidence and less fear. nnAnd as I reflected, I realized periods of non masturbating corresponded to periods of when I was more outgoing. From the 7th-9th grade years of my life, video games took up my entire day, so I rarely masturbated to porn. I was socially adequate, I was able to say, make friends and joke with random people in Spanish class during activities. However, when I quit videogames in 10th grade, porn became my new team waster, and I went from masturbating once maybe every week to 4-5 times every day. In 9th grade, I would frequently get horny in classroom. In 10th grade, now that I think of it, I was not able to get aroused at all in public. Also in those frequent masturbating 10th grade years, my thoughts became more insecure and so I talked less. nnNow that I'm in grade 11, I looked for some way to get back to my old outgoing ways, and so since 2 weeks ago, I stopped orgasming all together and forced myself to stop getting aroused to pictures and porn. nThis video explains why you shouldn't watch porn : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jX2btaDOBK8nnANYWAYS, my question is, does frequent masturbation correlate with social anxiety? For me, frequent masturbation would be 3 or more times in a week. If you have social anxiety, can you give your input?nnThink of it, would you imagine a confident, self assured person masturbating to porn a lot? IN GENERALn_____nnExcuse me if the thread was a little unorganized and wordynnhere's a tally I'm going to use to keep track of any commentsn~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~nSocial Anxiety AND Freq. (> 3 times a week) Masturbation - 1nSocial Anxiety AND Non Freq. Masturbation - 0n
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I was very addicted to masturbation (up to 11 times a day) for a few years. I had ridiculous anxiety, and read on NoFap that it can help. I stopped for 4 months and didn't really feel any improvement, now I've met a kind of compromise so I don't overdo it anymore but it doesn't really help with anxiety, or at least it didn't in my case.nn Any anxious people who are chronic masturbators should try it if they think it may help.
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Does medication help or worsen your social anxiety?
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Depends on person to person. It doesn't have any effect on me.neithet positive not negative. So i left SSRI and also Benzo.nBenzo did show some positive effects but weaning those medicine for as short as 1 month was a nightmare for me.
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After having been pretty much alone in the corridor/dorm (or whatever it's called in English) all summer, people are now returning. It's been really nice not being anxious every time I walk into the kitchen and it's been really nice not going to bed hungry because I don't dare to face people. Guess that's over now. I've wanted dinner for the past hour but every time I open the door to go to the kitchen I hear people talk in there and I just get anxious, turn around, close and lock the door and don't eat. I wish I had my own apartment.nnI'm really anxious about next semester starting as well. According to the schedule for the first course/class, we've got a mandatory lecture/seminar where we have to practice presentations and soon after that we've got a group project where an oral presentation is mandatory as well. I can't. I. Can't. Nope. (Seriously, not even taking beta blockers before presentations has worked for me so far. Speaking to my doctor about it soon.)nnBesides social anxiety disorder I also have depression and two other anxiety disorders and they all affect my studies so yeah, I'm pretty anxious now.nnI guess I just wanted to get all of that off my chest and if someone here understands then that's a plus. Advice is appreciated as well.nnUPDATE: Ok, I finally managed to go get some food but I had to listen closely at the door before I opened it and I hurried like crazy when getting the food as well. The semester hasn't even started yet and I'm already doing these things.
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I close my eyes or look at my shoes.. Probably looks stupid but I really don't want to faint or something worse.. I wish I could have a scarf that covers my eyes like the guy in the movie Ku00e4nn ingen sorg. Haha nnI have no idea, I just had a feeling. I might have a
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I can be driving down the street and I'll see someone on the side of the road either walking or jogging. I'll probably think about that person for the next 5 or so seconds before I completely forget about them and continue on my merry way.nnHowever, once the tables are turned and if I were to be the one jogging down the street, everybody that drives by is going to be judging me and constantly thinking about me for the next 5 years. They might even tell their closest friends about me.nnIt would be nice being able to convince myself that everybody forgets about the person on the side of the road after a few seconds, but once the adrenaline starts pumping and and suddenly you forget how to breath and think, reason kinda goes out the window.
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You've decided that the anxiety feeling is you being afraid of people judging you. I think that's how you justify the feeling but that's not what it is. I think it's your subconscious trying to enforce your perceived social status. Like since you aren't worth a damn you better make sure no one notices you.nnI've been thinking about this a lot and I really think there's something to it.
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text
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Citalopram anti-depressant! It has worked wonders for my social anxiety. I am so social now, I don't even recognize myself sometimes; in a good way!
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I'm not beautiful nor do l stand out in any way or anything like that, so why do people keep fucking staring at me? It's so rude, annoying and unnecessary. I'm literally just minding my own goddamn business and everyone's like:
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I notice whenever I'm turning in or out of a place and car turns the opposite way and we cross paths, they be staring smh. I guess I had to look at them to notice, but it happens nearly every time
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Today I had an interaction with a cashier at a clothing store. I think I came across as confident and friendly during greeting, which I have gotten pretty good at lately. Friendly smile, good eye contact. He, a normal extroverted young guy, was comfortable with me and asked me to join the rewards program they offer. I said yes and filled out a quick application. He looked at the paper and noticed my zip code.nn
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Yeah, you definitely nailed it. I need more practice for sure.
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Guys I'm honestly so proud of myself. I was eating dinner alone and saw this girl who I feel like I've seen a lot around campus before eating by herself so I told myself to go talk to her. I've had this thought plenty of times before but I always make up some excuse not to talk to someone and chicken out. So this time I just told myself no excuses, the worst thing that happens is she thinks you're weird and so what. It still took me another 5 minutes to actually make myself stand up from where I was sitting and my heart was pounding. Anyway, I actually did it and at first she seemed confused as to why I was asking to sit with her but I just pushed myself through it and started conversation with her. It turns out she is also a sports fan and we hit it off and talked for about an hour. I tried my best to be natural and make eye contact with her when talking which I think I did ok at, but could still improve. I ended up asking for her number which she gave me. Overall I am just so glad I pushed myself to do it. Right now I'm just trying to make sure I don't start second guessing myself into thinking that I must have looked/sounded stupid for some reason.
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Thanks. I really hope it gets easier for me.
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I got to thinking earlier, and I realized that one of the main reasons for my social anxiety is me being afraid to say the wrong thing and hurt people or let them down. I know it sounds obvious, but, when I look into it, it's not. It's so much deeper than it sounds, than normal people would understand.nnToday, I literally stayed in a Discord voice chat two hours longer than I wanted because I didn't want to hear my friends' disappointment over me leaving. I left after one had gone and the other temporarily was away from her computer, after quite awhile of trying to type up a reasonable excuse. And I just feel so bad about that.nnI'm not sure what to do with that information, nor am I sure why I'm affected so negatively at the mere thought of talking one-on-one or in front of people. But, hey, I guess this is a step in the right direction of understanding myself a bit more. I'll (hopefully) understand the other factors one day and learn how to fight against them. Or so I hope.
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That makes complete sense, I get you. Honestly, mentioning leaving changes the whole tone of conversations and then it's just awkward and I just want to disappear.
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Idk if this is an inappropriate post given the recent news but I've been thinking about this a lot recently. I'm 19 now and about one year since I graduated high school. It would be an understatement to say I was miserable every day for those four years, listening to others make conversation and friends while I had nothing I could do about it. About the title of the post, there was a surprising amount of times where people would joke about me shooting up the school, which I obviously found incredibly insulting because I would never murder innocent people even if I hated them. I can't really think of many reasons why they would say things like that about me, maybe because I was a depressed white kid who wore hoodies a lot and had no friends, I guess that fits the stereotype. nnIn terms of examples, I remember one time a couple of people were talking to me (most likely out of pity) and one of them asked me what I wanted to do after high school, and before I got a chance to answer, one of them turned to their friend and said
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Screwed up. I'm glad you were able to get through that horrible experience. Nobody should make jokes about such a thing if you showed no signs of racism/bigotry, aggression, or interest in weapons. It would break me if I got tied to something so violent and traumatic, just for being quiet and keeping to myself.
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My mental health (and physical actually) have been going downhill for 6 months. nnIt's now the worst it's ever been and I don't see how I can possibly recover from this.
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Can confirm. My mental health spiraled down a lot in the last.... 48 hours. Not sure I'll recover so well this time around.
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Originally I was supposed to go with my younger brother so he can get a haircut, my mom said she'd be giving me a haircut if I was too uncomfortable.nnWhen I got there, I said
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Congratulations dude ud83cudf89
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so my friends and I decided to meet over spring break at a park and hang out, play volleyball and goof around, we have a group chat to talk to each other and stuff but I'm absolutely terrified because its tmr and I'm scared that they forgot and i don't wanna show up alone at a park with my volleyball for hours waiting for nobody to show up just to call my parents to pick me up and i don't wanna be a nuisance asking in the group chat if anybody forgot bc if they didn't, it would land me in an awkward situation and I wouldn't wanna apologize for asking a dumb questions does anybody have any ideas what I should do? cuz I'm on the verge of tears.
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i just tried that and one of my friends said
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Will going with my gut be more accurate when I read people or in any social situation?
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You need to lear to be semi skeptical of your thoughts, especially ones that seem overly simplistic and negative (ie- everyone hates me, I can do such and such, etc). Those are often wildly inaccurate and as people with SA we train ourselves over and over to think these things automatically. Just because they're gut feelings does make them true or helpful for you.
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I was brought up in a super religious single mother household. It was just me & my mom most of the time. My had me in her late 40s. However my childhood wasn't normal I lacked communication skills & social skills. I talk but sometimes I don't register when people are joking I always sound very professional or serious all the time. Unless I'm with someone I'm comfortable with. But I'm 22 years old having such a problem with anxiety. I always think something is wrong health wise. However I want to mention my mom has a sever mental illnesses. I'm tired of feeling bad. Do you anyone have any suggestions on anxiety to brighten the mood. I also tried weed that just made me even more depressed.
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Thank youuu!!!
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I've recently come into a lot of realizations that have changed my perspective on how to socialize. I started meditating which taught me how to be in the moment instead of in my head during social interactions. I'm not perfect at it but I've improved a lot. It also has taught me the importance of relaxing and being happy. I've made a lot of good headway in that I find myself connecting more with people. However my anxiety hasn't gone away. I still have insecurities about not being entertaining enough for people. I found out I may be in an anxiety inducing situation a couple months away and when I'm anxious I sometimes dry heave or throw up which is what ended up happening today. I've meditated to calm me down and it has helped but its discouraging how I can't seem to get rid of anxiety for sure.
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Yes, meditation is great! I have induced the mindset that comes with LSD/Mushrooms from just meditation. Only the mindset (not the visuals). Deep subconscious thinking is extremely powerful at coming to realizations about any issues you are having.nnYour symptoms sound terrible. I am emetophobic and I use to get extreme nausea from my anxiety when it was bad.
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Have you or anybody else you know recovered from social anxiety, is their any evidence that this will ever go away? if it was you what happens and how has things changed?
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I'm 32 and I have partially recovered. The most effective thing for me is putting myself in situation where I have to rely on communicating with others. I moved to Alaska to work at a fishing resort where it was basically impossible to leave (things like that). I am also a teacher and I dont really have any anxiety at work unless confronted. nnWith that said Anxiety comes and goes and will likely be something that needs to be managed for your whole life. (exercise, diet, support, etc.) My anxiety has been getting bad again because of stress from a new job and depression.
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Hi, I just need to a safe place to say how I feel about having roommates in a house. I usually do not ever want to interact with my roommates. I try my best to avoid all 3 of them everyday and it's getting to the point I'm thinking I need to seek therapy about this because sometimes I won't go to the kitchen and get something to eat because I feel this intense feeling of not wanting to talk to my roommates. I am forced into saying a greeting to them when I come back home but I hate this feeling. I don't understand why I always want to avoid them. And I'm so frustrated with myself. My anxiety is through the roof every time I have to leave the house.
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Thanks I'm going to seek therapy. I can go out and interact with strangers and have small talk and I usually feel ok to be honest but I feel anxious to do basic things in front of my roommates inside the house so I feel weird and embarrassed and I don't know why other than I feel uncomfortable living here
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i don't know what to do, he's one of my closest friends, what do i do?
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it was sexual assault
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For at least about 4 years now I've had bad diahhrea and bowel trouble. I've tried all kinds of meds, doctors and procedures, and no soap. I couldn't figure our what was causing it, and it was really bothering me a lot. Well last Thursday I went back to my primary care doctor and said again how much I hated this because it was really affecting my new job. He said that sometimes meds can cause this kind of thing. So he checked my med list, and gave me the bad news. nnI've been taking Viibryd for my moderate bipolar, anxiety, major depression, and paranoia symptoms. On Thursday my primary took a look at the side effects for the Viibryd, and the first one is diahhrea. So now I have to go to my psych doctor and have her stop my Viibryd and find another medication that can go with my Latuda. nnMy suggestion to you is make suer you check ALL the side effects of the drug(s) you start taking BEFORE you take it so you know what you're getting into. That way you don't have the same troubles I have now.
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https://www.healthline.com/health/food-nutrition/wheatgrass-benefits
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Hi i'm a 30 year old man from Toronto and i still live at home. I grew up with adhd and social anxiety and was really terrible at school. I did end up going to college which is like community college in the us. Kept giving up on school and just had very low self esteem and would just push people away from me because i was bullied so much as a kid. I never felt like i had my own personality, i just judge my self so much and i had people around me who abused me as a child. I tend to push people away even women who liked me i was confused at why they liked me. I just have a lot of self hatred that i'm trying to fix myself. I read alot of self help books and have taken therapy but never drugs but i'm second guessing that now.nnThank you guys for listening.
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finding the right medical drug can be really hard, since you usually have to try a few first before you find one that works and they can fuck you up in tons of different ways mentally and physically, if your thinking of trying make sure you start at a really low dose and work up, also my first acid trip made me a lot less insecure and feel better about myself and that happens for a lot of people, also be careful if you try that as a bad trip on a high dose can literally make you go insane
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Hi, this is a weird thing I've noticed about myself. I don't want to meet anyone to
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I have this issue. I think it's more of a motivational/depression thing than an anxiety issue. I often feel like I don't want to get out of the house even if it's people I like, hell, even with my girlfriend.
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ERROR: type should be string, got " https://nationalsocialanxietycenter.com/liebowitz-sa-scale/nn(Apparently, the maximum value is 144. )nn(https://www.reddit.com/poll/vzw8dw) " |
122! GREAT! nnBut oh man i am so much better now than in my early teens. nnMood still ruined lol
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I've suffered with social anxiety since I was 4 years old. I am now 20 years old. I'm also diagnosed with OCD, generalized anxiety disorder, and persistent depressive disorder. I've done years of therapy and in 2019, I got put on prozac. This year, I got a higher dose of prozac and I am now taking 20mg. Sometimes I feel that it makes me more anxious. I just hate that social anxiety is basically my life. It's all I know. I never talked at school because of it. Like I literally didn't talk to anyone from kindergarten to my senior year of high school. They thought I had Aspergers but I got diagnosed with Social anxiety disorder instead. I hate that it (and my other mental illnesses) make me feel so worthless and that my life feels empty. I can't get a job because of it. I don't have friends because of it…. I just am not happy.
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I'm sorry. I can relate and also I feel it has affected my development because of its overwhelming presence taking away from my focus.
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I think lots of people with anxiety, including myself, express the feelings of
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I think the problem is, I had nothing more to say and I actually did want to go because I was getting anxious. It happens a lot. I can't talk for very long before I start getting really nervous and he just sensed it I think.
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nfrom the moment I wake up until I go to sleep I do the same and in the same order. it's like living the same day over and over again, and I'm already tired of all this.
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Same day, different date...
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Y'all have any tips for how to manage social anxiety? I only get anxious when I'm in a small group setting. I feel like everyone's judging my appearance or how I sound. So in a Zoom breakout room or in a small discussion-based class (honestly screw whoever came up w/zoom breakout rooms). Whenever I have to talk, my hands shake, I speak at 1000mph, my voice gets high and shaky, and I sound stupid asf it's literally so embarrassing :( I know people say you should put yourself in challenging social situations like asking for books on sex at a bookstore or talking really loudly in public, etc but are there any other ways to combat it?
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dude same here, and then after class I have such a massive headache bc of all the stress and anxiety I put myself through ud83dude2d and then I realize like why am I putting so much stress on myself lolnnbut yeah I hope I kinda helped :)
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So today I was at work. A coworker had left her email open on one of the shared computers, and I glanced at it walking by and saw my name. I know I shouldn't have looked but couldn't help it. It was a chat between her and another coworker talking about getting a group together to go out. When I was mentioned, the other one said
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(https://youtu.be/4EcNN7le5N8)
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This is honestly such a huge milestone for me. I'm usually so anxious by myself. But I came here telling myself that if I feel anxious or am not having fun, I'll just go home. I'm not the kind of person to connect or randomly talk to people I don't know, so I haven't really talked to anyone else much, but honestly I don't care! It's so RARE that I don't care in this kind of situations. I'm so chill and it's so relieving. Now I'm going to play Paranoia rpg in about half an hour and I'm really excited!
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Very encouraging to read. I'm brave enough to go to cafes or movies by myself, but not cons. Yet.
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Several years ago, back when things were better, I played in the student play as one of the two narrators. I preferred that role because I can't really act emotions and everything else the regular characters have to act. It was scary, but I made it.nnMoving to the nowadays. There was the festival in the nearby town and its organiser remembered out student play. He asked us to play it again, and I was asked to once again join as the second narrator. Ngl, I almost didn't go because... I guess I was too anxious, scared of messing things up.nnHowever, I still went. The performance was today, with like twenty people in the audience. I messed up a few lines, but managed to quickly come up with something else. It was kinda obvious, as my new
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Thank you very much. I feel like we need more positive posts here.nnI'm really glad I went. Currently gathering the courage to watch the video from the play, haha.
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My work is downtown, and the average parking space is $7-8 a day... plus traffic and wear & tear on car, etc. However, there's a bus stop down the street from our house, and with a 30-day pass, it's only $1 a day. nnLogically, I NEED to use the bus. It'll save lots of money, both in parking and car maintenance... it's good for the environment... and I wouldn't have to deal with traffic anymore. Of course logic doesn't always play into it.nnMy big fear is just looking like an asshole when I try to pay, because I'm convinced everyone else on the bus is a
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> my mind tells me that these people will all know each other... or at least recognize each other. Therefore I will stick out.nnOh. In that case they might notice. What would you think if you saw a new face on a bus that you ride regularly?
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Any insight on antisocial personality disorder would be appreciated. I know someone wirh this disorder. I'm looking for advice how to help them . How do I know when they are truthful or manipulative? I know the symptoms . I also kniw there is a spectrum. Everyone is different. Any insight wouid be appreciated. Thank u
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It is hard to say if you're in any kind of danger. It really depends on severity and level of past treatment. Considering this person is diagnosed, that means it is at least so severe that they had to see a clinician which isn't common for them (they are more likely to avoid clinicians or receive this diagnosis when looking into another issue like bipolar disorder or self-harm). nnI'm not saying to stop being this persons friend, but know the risks and be cautious. Don't be gullible and take everything with a bit of suspicion. nnUntil you know this person better, I would not put yourself in a vulnerable position with them.
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nHey there! I came here looking for some advice and help. I'm dealing with a lot of mental health issues but I have no one to talk to. My mom tells me to talk to her but I feel like whenever I do she just dismiss it because she doesn't think I can have anything wrong with me mentally.(I'm good at hiding things so most times it sounds like I make things up) I think I have depression and adhd(mild) but I can't get a professional diagnosis due to my family and where I live and I'm feeling really helpless. I've thought about doing drugs and alcohol and even suicide but I don't want to die. I don't trust my school and my family as they're the core of the issue. Any help or advice? And FYI I'm a 15(turning 16 in a few months) female if that helps
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That's really helpful!! My moms all about being healthy so I don't think she'll question it :) thank you, I'll try and see what works!
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Especially when it's something you want to know more about but you don't know enough about it to ask directly and they just look at you cluelessly.nnExamplennMe: “Is this a good fishing rod for uh… pond fishing?”nnThem: “Like how do you mean?”nnMe: “for uh… fishing in a pond? Like is there a better rod or something?”nnThem: “Uhh… well that depends really.”nnMe: “Depends on what?”nnThem: “what you want to catch.”nnMe: “well I'm new to fishing so I don't really know what to catch, I'm just trying to catch something.”nnThem: “oh sure that should do the trick. I just don't really understand what you are trying to ask me.”nnAnd that's my conversation but with every single time I have to ask for advice for anyone. They just give me this dead eyed stare.
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Most of my struggles with articulating myself are in situations where I'm deeply afraid that what I'll say will not be received well. But apart from that, I've found that writing (or specifically, keeping a journal) helps me be more articulate in my day-to-day lifennMaybe that will work for you.
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I didn't used to have this problem, I mean I was okay at presentations a few years ago, but since last year every time I have a presentation I start shaking really bad. I thought it wasn't visible to the audience, but my teacher just told me he could see it, and he was sitting in the back of the class.nnWe had to give a presentation about a website we made, and I made this really great website. Probably one of the best in the class (if I may say so myself) and my presentation just ruined it. I got a 7/10 for it (which is equal to a B/B- in US), but I know I could've gotten a much higher grade for it. Especially because everyone got at least a 7 for their website.nnAnyways, any tips for how to handle giving presentations? Most importantly, how do I stop shaking? How do you guys deal with it.
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Can I just say I think it's ridiculously unfair that your grade depends at all on how well you present the website? You're basically grading how well the students handle presentations, not the actual work.nnI know when we did this sort of thing in high school we just fired up a web server and gave the teacher the IP for our workstation for grading..
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i switched my career to tech from my degree specialty specifically to minimize time where id have to talk others throughout the day. because life is about accepting your flaws and persisting despite them, or even existing alongside them, right? well, i guess that “basement coder” trope is a lie cos i cannot believe the amount of meetings im expected to attend, and someday soon, presentations to entire depts/company are expected as well.nnwhat do i do? what could i possibly change my career to now? funeral home embalmer? nnits not just that i would do a presentation once. i could manage once, fail horribly, and live. its the expectation of weekly, monthly, quarterly presentations. i will always have one looming in the future and gives me a lot of never-ending anxiety. as if the learning curve isnt enough! nnfurther, the amount of meetings exhausts me at the same level as my retail job in college. like, just let me work! i want to be a good employee and work and just live my life… is there another field more appropriate for someone like me? is it my company? do other programming jobs have less people interaction? i thought programmers were stereotyped as people like me (awkward, social anxiety). nni am ambitious and curious and cant believe im trapped in this body with limitless social anxiety and shyness. what a curse.
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My experience is a little different. I started as a hobby when I was a kid then did freelance stuff on the side or getting a couple of my full time employers online for probably 10 years. Worked my way from a different tech support job into a legacy codebase and stayed there for 3-4 years, now a few years into what I consider a super fun and challenging Junior spot where I get to work with a ton of smart people, third party services, and current .net code. Technically 7 years but the other stuff is more interesting to talk about.nnDepending on the company you work for, yeah maybe. I count myself super lucky to keep finding companies that reward me when I really put effort in, but I know that can't always be expected. nnIf you feel like you've grown enough to deserve more, by all means, go for better spots. Just keep in mind
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Hey people. I feel so frustrated, I hope that someone can relate to what i'm feeling right now. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years, we are good together and love each other. For the past few months he has been nagging about how I never go out with him and his friends. I believe it's because he moved back to our hometown and he goes out with them pretty much every night. The thing is I dont wanna be a part of it.nnI have social anxiety and I have somewhat told him about how I don't feel comfortable around his friends. Of course I have gone out with them quite a lot of times in these 5 years. But it has been a struggle every single time. I struggle to speak up and laugh and pretend i'm having fun while I seriously don't like them at all! I'm sure he just sees his other friends bringing their gfs along all the time and he once told me about how I never do it. I was hurt by that. Why am I supposed to drag myself and not be myself while the others are having fun?nnWe have talked about it so many times and he never gets it. Recently I found out one of his friends even 'complained' about how I never go and said friend feels offended because I act like I hate them. Why are people so stupidly self-centered? I try but every time it feels like I am choking inside and then I have to do it because whatever. My fellow SAers I ask for help!
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I don't have advice, I can only relate. We went to my husbands best friend's house in Denver (I'm from Texas). Not only did he not respect my personal space but he insisted I leave my 5 month old baby with his wife (who was about to take a nap and of whom I JUST MET) while we go out to buy grilling supplies. I was like HELL to the NO. nn
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I've been feeling like garbage recently. My self-esteem is practically non-existent and I feel so isolated from everyone. I'm afraid that the more people learn about me, the more they'll realize I'm boring. I can't hang out with friends or go new places because I'm afraid I'll embarrass myself. And I'm only in high school. How am I supposed to function as an adult when I'm scared to order food at a counter? But to get therapy I would need to tell my parents how awful I feel. I'm so closed off from my family, I can't tell them anything personal. As far as they're concerned, I'm the kid who keeps to himself but is never a problem and always does well in school. I can't just walk into a room and be like
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Internet hug for you, kid. I had a rough time in middle school and high school too. Things got better for me socially in college. I would suggest talking with your high school guidance councilor first, they are free and don't have to involve your family right away.nnMy brothers have also had issues with depression. I've learned that often chemical imbalances in the brain can cause depression, and medication can help correct those imbalances. It might help you feel more comfortable asking for help if you think of it the same way you would if you had the flu. You can't control if you get the flu, just like you can't control the chemicals in your brain... all you can do is go to the doctor and do what he/she proscribes. nnHope you find the help you need. Feel free to PM me if you want.
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does anyone feel like their anxiety causes them to consistently overthink in every way when it comes to their health? like it makes me a hypochondriac but also the depression worsens it? if so, what do you do to tell yourself you're healthy and okay without always having so ask other for reassurance?
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i work out and eat healthy regularly :(
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the post i made before was pretty pointless apart from the fact it allowed me to get it off my chest.nnanyway as someone who is certain they have social anxiety and bad, but has no clue what so ever how to start getting over it and living with it what are some good tips?nnone thing i want to know is that im pretty bad at conversation, i know the best way to get better is to talk to people, which i do talk over the internet but i don't really feel any sense of getting better. what else can i do is there some books on social skills/charisma maybe? i think having confidence in myself would help getting over SA a little and being a good or at least a better conversationalist would do that.
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The problem with conversation over the internet (text-based/message boards) is that you have time (for as long as you want) to reply to someone.nnTalking to someone in person/having a conversation face to face you sort of have to be able to reply as soon as they finish talking. Taking 5 mins to reply to them would be kind of strange.nnI had to get over my SA rather quick because of a job I accepted. I have to deal with the public face to face daily. However, I have not fully gotten over it. I still have my moments.nnIn order for me to be better at my job I took up a second persona. Sort of like acting. Since I have to deal with the public, and many times they are pissed off, I adopted a
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After having my laptop stolen I was already having a bit of a crappy day then when I was in the supermarket a guy walked past, looked at me and made a disgusted face... I'm not sure what I did to offend him, I then bumped into him in another aisle and he told me to f off. It's days like this that reinforce the idea that I'm better off away from people... But at the same time I feel so alone. nnHow does everyone else get past down days like this and the feeling that everyone has something against you?
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Fuck that guy. I hate people like that. Just remember that not everybody it like that. There are people out there who are nice, decent people who are worth your time and energy. This guy obviously wasn't one of them. Keep your head up and stay cool.
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