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{
"description": "asking my best friend to not bring her boyfriend",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
WIBTA If I (17 F) Asked My Best Friend (16 F) To Not Bring Her Boyfriend (19M)?
|
Hey guys! I am back again with another moral dilemma concerning the same couple as last time!
My previous post about the same couple: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/arhjkt/aita_for_being_mad_at_my_best_friend_for_dating/?st=JT7R3AG6&sh=e0abbeff
TLDR: My best friend says she won’t date my ex after I told her their closeness makes me uncomfortable, suprise, they end up dating, I feel weird and upset with all of it.
Reading the post above might help explain the situation
So Best Friend and I are junior and senior (respectively) in high school, and that glorious hormonal mosh pit of a dance is coming up. That’s right, it’s prom time!
Keep in mind, I’ve been telling Best Friend that I am uncomfortable being around them as a couple. At one point, she reveals to me she’s not even entirely sure of her feelings toward Ex. She’s confessed that there are “unresolved feelings” between her and her own ex, but she insists that she’d never revisit the relationship.
In this same convo, as she’s discussing her doubts about Ex, and I kinda slip up in the moment and say something along the lines of “Oh, thank god. I was worried you were gonna bring Ex to prom!”.
Wrong thing to say, and I feel a little guilty for jumping the gun like that. She gets a weird look on her face and that “we’ll see what happens” before prom, and I shouldn’t worry about it, because “a lot could happen between now and then”.
I am sorry, but I do not want Ex at my senior prom. He’d be going in my group, because we are all in one friend group and those are my only friends. I would feel like total shit all night, remembering the previous two proms I spent with him. As unhappy and embarassed about it as I am, the breakup is still tender and seeing him hurts. I wouldn’t have a problem with them if I didn’t feel so... ouchie whenever I saw him. He’s not even in high school anymore.
I have considered restating this to her. I might’ve been able to suck it up and shut up if I knew they were completely in love, but she’s not even sure how she feels. I don’t know. I really don’t want him there.
I know this story is biased from my point of view, but I will try to answer questions and such as neutrally as I can.
WIBTA?
|
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{
"description": "seeing my friends boyfriend",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for seeing my friends boyfriend?
|
About 1 year ago I started to become friends with my best friends (BF) boyfriend, and he'd occasionally invite me out to do things with him. At the start I was very sceptic about the whole thing, constantly asking BF if it was ok, they aren't uncomfortable with things, and they always said it was fine. So after a while of this I stopped asking if it was ok because 1: It had always been fine before and 2: I felt that now as a friend of her boyfriend it wasn't entirely necessary to ask to see a friend. Occasionally I would still ask if it was ok just to check, and if BF ever brought it up they would confirm that it was alright.
You guessed it though, recently it hasn't been so alright. Apparently BF feels that all of their friends would prefer to see her boyfriend instead of her, and that when I do go to boyfriends house BF feels left out in a way. I'm told (by boyfriend) that BF always knows when we are hanging out, and the issue only really arises after the day. I should mention that nothing has ever happened once between me and boyfriend, it's been entirely friendship.
I want to know, AITA? I haven't had a chance to talk to BF (issue escalated a week ago, and before that they always said it was fine) , and when I do hopefully it'll clear a lot of this up. Should I stop seeing boyfriend? It would suck because they're a good person and a good friend, but I'd rather have my best friend then a good one.
|
HISTORICAL
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{
"description": "teasing my bestfriend of 7 years",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for teasing my bestfriend of 7 years
|
sorry if the formatting is bad i usually lurk and I'm on mobile
It all started when i helped my friend get an expensive gift for his computer, my friend ane i usually teased him on how long it took for him to save up for the computer and he would tease us back respectively.
We had plans on going to the gym but i overslept and he made fun of me for it the next time i did go with him i was sore out or my mind the next day and told him i couldn't follow him to get guitar strings because of it the only thing he called me for the rest of the week was sore and how my excuse was shit.
I then gave him my spare monitor since he needed one for his pc and when i did give it to him i forgot the power cable and when he asked for it i couldn't find it. He got mad at me and wouldn't stop mentioning how i left him alone to get guitar strings.
Fast forward to today and i get a message in a group chat on whatsapp and i made a joke by teasing him about his gift and the monitor which we did regularly. he teased me back about being sore and 'abandoning' him. this is where it all goes to shit a group member asked us to not argue in the group and i said i was stating facts.
He left the group and i messaged him saying i was only joking and messing around he replied saying i was annoying and to fuck off.
I'm honestly lost most of my friends removed me from social media and i just need honest opinions and response on what i did wrong and how i can be a better friend
|
HISTORICAL
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{
"description": "being upset at my step Mom for moving on",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for being upset at my Step Mom for moving on?
|
I've been living with my Dad and my Step Mom for the past 6 years. Her and I started off rocky but came to like each other. My Dad recently passed from a hard battle with very fast moving lung cancer. Her and did our best to help him as much as we could but when we got closer to the end there wasn't much we could do. It's been about 5 months since he passed and she has told me several times that my dad was it for her and that she doesn't think she could love anybody else as much as she loved my dad. They were about to get married before he passed but the paper came to late. Her and my dad frequented online chat rooms and made friends very quickly. After my dad passed she got closer to one of her male online friends. I've overheard her telling him that he needs to make more time for her and stop treating her like she's one of his other friends because she doesn't want to be like one of his other friends. I've overheard that she knows that he loves her and expects something from him for valentines day. I love her like she's my own mother and I know she just wants to be happy and it could be just a hunch that she loves him back but she spends hours on the phone with him and has told him she likes listening to him sleep and video game because it comforts her. Am I the asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
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RIGHT
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{
"description": "cutting a girl out of life because of a stupid decision I made",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA For cutting a girl out of life because of a stupid decision I made?
|
So I was friends with a girl who I really loved and she got into a relationship with a guy, and I didn’t feel good about him. He seemed sketchy. I wanted her to be happy so I didn’t say anything. He ended up almost doing some really bad stuff to her and I cut her out of my life because I felt guilty for not saying anything. AITA?
(This is something a friends asked me, not something that happened to me)
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
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{
"description": "returning my bfs gift",
"pronormative_score": 10,
"contranormative_score": 18
}
|
AITA for returning my bfs gift?
|
Ok so a couple of weeks ago i bought my bf an exspensive set of gamijg headphones. I put alot of research into what would be a really good brand and a really good set considering he does alot of online gaming and he had told me that his previous set had broken.
I struggle alot with money so buying this gift for him really put me in a tight spot but he's one of those people that are EXTREMELY hard to shop for because he doesn't have much interest in anything so i thought this would be an amazing gift.
Its something he actually needed and its something he can use on a regular basis and it something i put alot of thought and care into buying and i expected him to be genuinely happy about receiving.
So imagine my shock and disappointment when he opens the gift and his only reaction is "meh" and he tosses the gift aside like its nothing. Not even a "thanks babe." Just seriously nothing at all. He's kept the gift set aside completely unopened, unused, and collecting dust.
So i returned them for a full refund and now hes pissed. He said he was keeping them as a back up set for when his current set are no longer usable.
So AITA for returning his gift to the store and getting the money back?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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}
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OTHER
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{
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}
|
WRONG
|
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|
b2jovi
|
{
"description": "telling my mom to stop sharing embarrassing stories about me to my gf",
"pronormative_score": 5,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for telling my mom to stop sharing embarrassing stories about me to my GF?
|
Mom... Just stop.
People can't take you anywhere cause you keep embarrassing me.
Gosh!
^(Just a little AITA humor for y'all. But it's also true so AITA?)
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
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}
|
RIGHT
|
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|
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{
"description": "flirting with an ex of mine I thought I'd date again, then seeing that they hadn't changed I stopped",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for flirting with an ex of mine I thought I’d date again, then seeing that they hadn’t changed I stopped?
|
So basically it goes a few weeks ago I texted her to tell her my number Incase she needed anything, after which we started to talk about just everyday things. After awhile we started to flirt and then after a week we started to light sexting, which I will admit I did encourage a bit, after about a week of talking I started to see the same things I broke up with her for, belittling, taking things out on me, general rudeness, so I stopped her and told her I wasn’t comfortable with sexting or anything relationshipy with her. AITA for cutting it off when I started to see that she hadn’t changed her behavior?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
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|
b9u227
|
{
"description": "telling two girls I like them",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA I told two girls I like them
|
So, i know these two girls, one is the cousin of a girl who likes me, call her cousin, and the other is the girl who likes me, now at a disco I started realizing how good looking cousin is, and when after she started messaging me begging me to tell her who I liked, and I said her in a panic!
Cut to later, I’m messaging the girl who likes me, and I can’t hold it in so I tell her that I like her, and I do, I like her for her personality, and after I realize how much I like this girl, I scramble and make cousin promise to never utter a word of this to anybody, she did, just git I message from the girl I like and who may hate me now saying “when we’re you gonna tell me” I feel like an asshole, am I?
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
|
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|
aip3en
|
{
"description": "dropping out of school",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA For dropping out of school?
|
I've always been one of what they call the slow kids. Until 2 years ago I ways had remedial classes and IEP which gives you like more attention or you sit close to the front or whatever they decide you need. Anyway so in my junior year for whatevrr reason they stop doing it and I fail more classes. Even before I fail 1 or 2 classes in semester. So right before winter break I get call onto my councilers office and he tell me that unless I pass all my classes at end of semester and then next semester I don't have enough credits I can graduate. Ok I have never pass all my classes even when ectra help. Then I'm really sad for Christmas and that sucked. We have a big fight on NYE but went out anyway and got really drunk. And they blown up my phone all night but I ignore them. I went home in the morning and they stay up all night for me and pissed off. We have a big fight and I leave. I stay with different friends and my bf which is totally forbidden but I didn't care becos I was mad. After I miss enough days school they call my mom and she calls me and I'm just like it doesn't matter becos I wasn't going to graduate anyway? And they said I can't come home ever if I don't go back to school but its been to long anyway. So I know this is all over a mess but am I the asshole or should they let me come home at least to get my stuff?
I wear out all my friends and broke up with nf over some stupid shit well he broke up with me. I am living in a pay for the week motel and I barely have any money for anything but rent. If I could get my stuff I have some money from Christmas and I could get my clothes and stuff to sell.
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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WRONG
|
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b5zs5f
|
{
"description": "not going somewhere for my brother's birthday",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
WIBTA if I didn't go somewhere for my brother's birthday.
|
My brother's birthday is coming up soon so he has invited some friends to go clubbing the day before. He called me to talk and to invite me to also go with them so we could celebrate his bday all together. I know most of the people he is going with, and though I wouldn't say they are straight up friends, I get along fine with them. My issue is not with any of them, my problem is that I really don't wanna go to any club anytime soon. I've been countless times and have sort of outgrown that whole vibe. I think it's a super shallow experience, straight up just don't like going anymore, would have a bad time, and bring the whole mood down with my not wanting to be there. I have nothing against anybody who enjoys going though, have a good time. It's just not for me anymore. I can try my best to pretend I'm having a good time but eventually the mask would fall off and people would start noticing. To give ya'll a little more context, he did this for his birthday last year also, and that time I actually went, so I feel like he should maybe pick something different to do this year instead. I even suggested this to him over the phone and he won't budge. It's his day though so it's his choice on what he wants to do and I totally respect that. I said that I would think about it and would let him know soon. He pretty much said I would be an asshole if I didn't go. I can't tell if this is coming from a good place or not. I'm torn between thinking he just wants me to be there so bad because I'm so important to him, or if it's his sort of narcissistic personality coming out and demanding that I go or else. He would never let me hear the end of it if I didn't go. He said he would do it for me if he was in this situation, but I don't really believe that. The next day we are also having the family get together to celebrate his special day. We're probably going to a restaurant and just chill all day, so it's not like I wouldn't celebrate his bday entirely. So what do you think Reddit? Should I just make this sacrifice? Just get totally wasted at the club so I don't have an unpleasant time? Or should I just not go because I don't want to and become the asshole I was always meant to be?
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
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|
RIGHT
|
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|
at4ww1
|
{
"description": "having resent for frequently doing tasks/chores for my GF and her sister that I live with",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
AITA For having resent for frequently doing tasks/chores for my GF and her sister that I live with.
|
So I recently moved like a month ago now from my hometown after completing my education to be with my GF who currently lives with her sister. Both do work normal day jobs and obviously for me I am eagerly trying to find work while also wanting to explore the city. However since getting here though I’ve had to accustom to different living habits and noticing the strangeness to not have your own ways. I am in no way a picky person to live with by any means but like basic things to be able to put my clothes in adequate space, to do my laundry my way and keeping a clean kitchen are necessities I need when living somewhere. Now closet space was an issue with my gf that we had to resolve after a few weeks, but all my pants are still hanging by clothes hanger which I am not use to. Secondly my GF’s sister recently bought this place and is trying to save on hydro and water by not using the dishwasher and only doing laundry when she is here on the weekend. Now over the course of living here I have been doing the dishes all by hand in the morning when they have left for work and dishes to do at night as they often don’t like cleaning dishes after supper throughout the week because they claim to be tired after a working day so I have been doing piles at night too. On top of her power saving habits I’ve needed to adjust to waking up in cold temps as she turns heating down to 15C over night in the middle of winter.
Living under what feels like doing the dishes 70-80% of the time I also end up having to shovel whenever it snows by myself (only 1 shovel), clean the baseboards, vacuum the house/week because of her dog, salt the ice laden path to the front door because they both couldn’t shovel it better before I got here. Another time I had to go rent a truck and pickup large sheets of wood for her sister on the complete opposite side of town because she can’t do it during work. I don’t really like saying no to anyone when asked to do things because I don’t like upsetting people and am not lazy myself, but its draining when finding a job is like a full time job and I have a load of house chores to do while they are at work and then when they come home all they do is watch TV and leave dishes. I also have to cook and prep food also or else I get sidekicks or grilled cheese for supper...
All being said I’m grateful for my GF’s sister to allow me to stay here and all, but we are still paying 600 from gf and 300 from myself a month. Additionally I buy basic stuff needed such as a kitchen garbage can, paper towel and not dollar store garbage bags. But it’s getting to the point that I am kind of resenting the fact I feel like I am treated as a stay at home dad or something and get a text or asked on weekends from the sister if I can shovel, clean the bathroom, dust the place, vacuum, start cutting this wood, etc. I’m scared to say no because of ensuing arguments.
|
HISTORICAL
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|
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b2xsf4
|
{
"description": "deflating à tire",
"pronormative_score": 7,
"contranormative_score": 8
}
|
AITA for deflating à tire?
|
A person parks regularly, and for extended periods of time in the only handicap parking we have at the office. The police will come and ticket cars if we call them and if there are no urgent calls. Which means they came only once in the last 6 months.
We went and spoke to the people working in other offices to explain that there are two different businesses that cater to handicaped people so we need this space for real people.
We suggested that every office could mention to their staff not to park there. This was 6 months ago.
I got fed up and deflated one tire of this car yesterday. I did not slash the tire, as I thought it would be too extreme. I want that person to be inconvenienced when they use that spot so they'll stop eventually. So, AITA?
TL;DR: AITA for deflating one tire on a car that keeps using the only handicap parking we have ?
Also, not my first langage so apologies for a n'y bad wording.
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
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WRONG
|
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|
asg9lh
|
{
"description": "wanting to go no contact with my EXGF",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for wanting to go no contact with my EXGF?
|
So I broke up with my ex about the first week of January this year. I was the one who broke up with her to make that clear. Breaking up we still had feelings for each other and wanted to stay together but can't because we both want to go completely different directions in life.
After this breakup, she has drunk messaged, called, or snapped me maybe once or twice a week saying how she misses me, wants to be with me, and physically wants to be me, aka horizontal mambo. Now I never indulged her to go pick her up and bring her to my place or anything. I pretty much just said, "yeah it sucks, i miss you too, we both have feelings still but bad ideas" I tried asking her to hangout when we were both sober but she only wanted to see me when she was drunk, that should have been a red flag.
Yesterday I finally got the box of her stuff together and took it to her place to give it back and help her with her car, it was totaled recently and she needed to go fill out some forms to sell it to the dealership.
NOW I MADE THE MISTAKE. I fucked up here i know and tried to kiss her. She rejected me okay fine, but I was kinda hurt after being told how much she misses and wants me. I then ask if she has been with other people since and if she has a date for her sorority event this friday. Yep, shes been with minimum two guys. Okay i shouldn't care, but after her telling me how bad she wants me that just fucked me up. She then asked if i'd still be able to take her to finish the car stuff on Friday. So pretty much she wants me to be a glorified chauffeur. So pretty much she wants to be friends still but only for me to drive her and never actually hang out.
So am I the asshole for being super pissed for her messages and everything and then being mad that she still wants to be "friends" and have me drive her around when I want to go no contact?
|
HISTORICAL
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| null |
AITA bc I told her to break up with him?
|
Okay... So this is my first post to credit so forgive me if I'm bad at this k?
So background info- I've had this friend since the start of the school year right? And she's super sweet. I also have this dude who sits near me at lunch and is kinda a creep. Like hes kinda
a neckbeard but not full fledged neckbeard yet. No joke, this dude has a fedora. Oh, and my lunch friend has yearbook
Onto the story, I had no idea these guys had any sort of relationship and my pan as* falls hard and fast. Till she starts talking about her bf. Now I'm not the person who breaks ppl up bc I like someone so that gets shoved aside like a lot of my other crushes. But then she starts to complain about her bf right? And its emotionally draining on her to be in this relationships and how hes too clingy for her taste and always touching her. So I tell her to talk to him and tell him he needs to change some of his behaviors bc shes doing all the comprising in the relationship. A month later and nothings changed. So when she introduced me to him when she walked me to lunch and i saw the neckbeard lite? Oof. I thought well maybe he has a good personality ya know? But i follow the neckbeard subredit soo... Anyways he says some creepy shit and takes us being introduced as permission to sit with me (the chick I usually sit with has a page due for yearbook so she'll be late sometimes) he says something along the lines of "You smell pretty good, but not as good as my gf." He then starts talking about why he loves her smell, and I make up some lame excuse of needing to talk to a teacher about a project and gtfo of that situation. I met you five minutes ago pls don't tell me about your fantasys of my friend. End up meeting yearbook friend in the hall and spend the rest of lunch in the library. My friend whos dating him says thats normal for him. Another month goes by and she finally decides to break up with him. She does. It's emotional. She tells me that im a big reason why she did it. But idk man, he was hella creepy but she smiled a lot more and was always out doing things with him.
So tl;dr : My friend I have a crush on is dating a creep and I accidentally cause a breakup I feel bad about bc she doesn't look as happy now.
Am I the asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
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|
RIGHT
|
r3JBHO5ju9QLN5KFPAhiSdCg0s5MgLix
|
b7xcv2
|
{
"description": "fixing my own train station I made in minecraft when my friend redesigned the whole thing",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for fixing my own train station i made in minecraft when my friend redesigned the whole thing.
|
Yes I'm referring all of this drama to a video game.
I created a train station that is linked to my friend's house and the train tracks he made were just linking it to my house. There is another railway which a different friend made which he made connecting to my house. My house is becoming a train station where there is a lot of messy rails. So in a solution, I relinked all of the tracks to a small building that has a track going to both of my friend's house and not including mine
The friend that originally made the tracks got pissed and just made the train tracks messier and linked my house again, but in a lazy way. The tracks took up the whole train station and didnt look pleasing. I got a little pissed by it. I rearranged the tracks and made it more pleasing to the eye. I told my friends that I fixed it and they didn't mind at all (including one of them who made it). I showed it to the friend who originally made the tracks and he got pissed and said all this.
"I want to physically assault you", "Everyone is mad at you." While I said "It's more cleaner and easier to move around."
​
Keep in mind both of our tracks have the same exact function.
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
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|
RIGHT
|
sxVjiGFOSa19JwcTeee1YcdfgpOqaH8e
|
a0mq1f
|
{
"description": "getting revenge on my neighbor",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA for getting revenge on my neighbor?
|
This may be a long story because this has been going on for a year, but here goes. About a year ago, i moved into a trailer park. It's in a very rural area, which is good for me. I like peace and quiet, it's nice and tranquil. Up until my neighbor started to be a nuisance. It was this family, which had a ton of kids, like at least 7 or 8 and a dog, a big dog, a great dane. It was fine for awhile. They seemed ok, they invited me and some other neighbirs for barbecues and everything. But as time passed, they got more and more annoying.
First of all, their dog. They never watched their dog, they just left it outside. He pretty much wandered all over the trailer park. Sometimes, their dog would come over and play with my 2 dogs. But, he also would come over and poop on my lawn. Which is gross, i mean, it's bad enough having to pick up after my own dogs, but then i had to pick up their dog's crap too. So, i just went over and asked them to not let their dog crap on my lawn. But they got rude and defensive about it. "Well, your dog comes over to our yard!". WHich was true, but my dog doesn't crap on their lawn, just to play with their dog (which they said was ok).
So, things were tense after that. Speaking of their dog, it kept coming over to my yard and getting into fights with my pitbull. Which is not good, you can't have these big dogs fighting like that. So i toldthem to keep their dog off my property. They never listened and kept letting their dog run around the neighborhood, and unfortunately, the dog ran into the road and got hit by a car and passed away. Which, was sad because the dog was actuallly pretty friendly. Just had poor boundaries.
So, they got 2 new dogs. 2 Chihuahas. They kept these 2 dogs outside 24 hours a day. During cold, heat, everything. They never let them in. The only place they were allowed to go was the tool shed. They could never come in their house. Their dog kept coming over to my yard, so i complained again. They put their dogs in shock collars.
But, these dogs made me miss the Great Dane. Because these dogs bark at EVERYTHING. It's like non stop. All day it's just BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK. I mean, i know dogs bark, but this was too much. Especially when the owners leave them out for hours, or really days at a time, and don't do anything to stop it. That's not annoying, they're being a nuisance to the entire neighborhood. So, me and a couple other neighbors visited them and asked them to control their pets. They said "Well, call the police if you don't like it!" and slammed the door. This went on for months
It got really bad, because it was an all day, every day thing. So eventually we did call the property owner. So, property management visited them and told them to keep the noise down. It got to the point that i had to call the police or the property owner almost once a week. They'd come over and tell them to keep their dogs quiet. I mean, i know that dogs bark but when it goes on for 2 or 3 hours at a time, then yeah, that's a nuisance. It's not like i was calling on the first bark or anything. It was also made worse by the fact that they would just leave the dogs alone and go away from the house. Just leaving them out in the yard when they're not home
So this went once for about 4 months. And one time, we called and they got a fine. A ticket. They started doing the right thing. For a couple weeks at least. I finally had enough and called animal control and told them about the dogs being out and barking and they took them away. I remember, i went outside and saw their young kids (at least 5 or 6) were crying. "Why did the bad man take Lucy and Diaz away?", then the mother pointed at me. "That man, he did it. He made them do it!"
So, after about a month, I got a visit from the propery manger. They said that my dog had been going onto their property.This was actually really bad timing because it was my son's birthday. I was having a cookout with the family and actually invited them as an apology. They just told me to go to hell. So, i started cooking the burgers and setting up the picnic tables and next thing i know, i see the property manager coming up along with a police officer. She told me that she got a complaint that my dog had been going on my neighbor's property. So, I asked which dog it was, she said it was my pitbull and that he was going over next door every day for the past 2 weeks. But the thing is, my pitbull actually passed away, like a month andn a half prior to this. I actually looked at their trailer and saw them peeking out the window while the manager was with me.
I mean, we have another dog. A Corgi. But we keep him in the house or within my fenced backyard because he couldn't be trusted. He would wander off. A lot. I explained the whole situation, and she understood it, that they were getting revenge for getting their dog taken away. Especially since the dog they complained about is dead. Which was also a low blow to us, because my son loved that pitbull and he was so upset once he heard about the neighbor and it reminded him of his dog.
So, after the party, i confronted them. I almost got into a fight with the dad "You know, if i wasn't in front of my kids right now. I'd kick your ass!", so i walked out and he told me "Watch your back".
So, after a couple weeks, he started up again. His revenge on me.
Keep in mind, at this time, i worked TWO jobs. One was an office job, the other was at the nursing home. i worked all night and would sleep during the day. And becuase of this, i don't like a whole lot of noise. I mean, some ambience is okay, but people being a nuisance is not okay. Here's how they got back at me. The whole clan (mom, dad and kids) all got in their driveway and just started screaming their heads off. Hooting, hollering and everything. And this woke me up, about 3 pm (i usually get up at 6 pm for work). I bought ear plugs, But it got worse. They started blowing air horns, and i swear i heard a saxophone in the noise. Their was a chainsaw at one point as well. This was during the day, at night when nthey weren't screaming, they would blast country music from their car radio. Full blast. I mean, i would sometimes leave at 8 pm and get home around 4:30 or 5 am and it was still playing full blast.
This went on for almost a week and progressed each time. I thought they'd get bored, so i didn't call the police. You know, too much of a hassle. But i did call the police. My son couldn't sleep, he was tired of it. They came, and even when they were over there, my neighbor still had their music playing. So, anyway, they got a warning.
A few weeks went by, i'm mowing my lawn. And his wife came up to me. She actually apoligized and said the father had been drinking too much and everything. That she's ashamed of how petty he's being and that she threatened to divorce him. Then the husband came up and grabbed her by her arm. He scolded her for ''Apoligizing to the bastard". He told me how much the kids loved those dogs and that i'm a homewrecker and his wife is divorcing him because of me.
So, later that day, he dragged out his amplifier to the porch and his guitar and played over and over, full blast. So, that night i had enough. I knew the police would be no help, so i grabbed the trash can from my bathroom, full of used toilet paper and dumped it all over their lawn. I also sent a fake phone call to their home phone, pretending to the the wife's lover.
The next morning, the fireworks went off. They argued, she started screaming "I'm tired of this!" and she divorced him and took the kids with her. He started screaming that he loved her and to come back. "You can't leave me! You can't leave me! Come back! Come Back!"
Anyway, he had a bit of an emotional breakdown on the lawn. Then he started blaming me for what happened. To top it off, i'm actually considering hitting on the ex-wife.
Am i at fault here?
So, am i the asshole for escalating this feud so badly that i caused a man to get divorced?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
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|
WRONG
|
BM1yEqeJBwjBnE3KMV0LkrXB6nLqPRYn
|
asizak
|
{
"description": "reporting my roommate for smoking weed in our college apartment",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 7
}
|
WIBTA for reporting my roommate for smoking weed in our college apartment?
|
TLDR: Roommate lit blunt in front of me in our kitchen while making casual conversation and proceeded to smoke it in his room
A little background, I live in an on campus apartment with a close friend from high school and our new roommate. I'm not a huge fan of the new guy, he's a few years older than us and stays up late most nights playing video games and being pretty but rationalizes it to us by saying he's a twitch streamer so he has to yell and scream. I've been woken up a few times by him jumping or shouting but it's not frequent enough to be a problem, just a nuisance.
Anyway
This happened roughly fifteen minutes or so ago so the smell is still very fresh. I was sitting in our living room doing some last minute studying for an exam I have tomorrow. Our new roommate (I'll call him NR) came out and went to the kitchen which is right next to the living room. Conversation went a something like this:
Me: Hey
NR: What's up man?
Me: Nothing much, just some cramming.
NR: I feel that I feel that
(His back was towards me but I could clearly see he was holding something against the electric burner on the stove)
NR: What test you got?
Me: Thermo
(At this point he was pretending to look for something and slightly bent down to take a drag and get an ash going)
NR: Well good luck
After that he walked back towards his room with his hand behind his back and closed his door. I have nothing against smoking weed and may or may not have done so a few times but never on campus let alone in our apartment. My other concern are the room inspections tomorrow night. Since we live on campus we have room inspections once or twice a semester and I know how long a smell can linger. I'm concerned about this somehow tying back to me or my friend. I just know if I did say something it would turn into a he said vs she said kind of argument since I can't really PROVE he was smoking in the apartment. I'm just honestly torn because I don't really care about smoking weed and don't want to ruin his life over it but at the same time I have my own best interest at heart and don't want to risk anything related to my education because I just got accepted into my major today.
​
So, would I be the asshole for saying reporting him for smoking weed in our apartment?
​
​
​
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
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AUTHOR
|
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|
WRONG
|
f9kreYprqaKvU1IdRgHE8kaQZvmJSKhx
|
a0edyl
|
{
"description": "getting revenge on a coworker",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA for getting revenge on a coworker?
|
A coworker filled all my desk drawers full of shredded confetti from the paper shredder. In return I filled his with extra fine glitter. Some are saying I've gone too far.
https://imgur.com/a/gCQCtpk
|
HISTORICAL
|
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|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
YTHV5i3zMYHWwxk69SclbpGldWzLGJTm
|
aaiy6j
|
{
"description": "flirting with two girls at the same time",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
AITA for flirting with two girls at the same time?
|
As the title suggest, I've been talking to two girls at the same time. The only thing is that I have a preference to one girl, and I know if I do start dating her, I might ghost the other. The second girl is sorta like a back up chick in case I'm not able to get with the one I really like.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
JgWOoD7lGNhNSZyl4zamJmUFkzjzCd6k
|
b4hnxt
|
{
"description": "expecting my future husband to be a house dad",
"pronormative_score": 11,
"contranormative_score": 9
}
|
WIBTA if I expected my future husband to be a house dad?
|
TLDR at the end (I’m a long winded hoe)
Ok so I was on discord with another redditor (yes I’m using my main account, I give no fucks) and somehow we ended up discussing my life goals.
I have very ambitious goals... I’m 23 and within 10 years..
>I want to be making a $200k-ish salary (this is slightly unrealistic $150k range is probably more reasonable but a girl can want)
>Be ready to purchase my own 4-5 bedroom home (maybe around $500k in the suburbs)
>And I want 3 kids total (not within 10 years just in general)
Granted I know these things may *not* happen how I want them to and that’s okay it may take longer or I might have more/less kids. Might have to get a smaller house. Might make a smaller salary. Might get let go. All sorts of things could happen. But this is the ideal course of life events for me. Something I’m working towards.
Then got to talking about my potential spouse and their contributions. I said something rather dismissive I suppose, but I stand by it.
>“If my husband makes less than the full time nanny ($30/hr), or the cost of daycare then we’d be wasting money by hiring a nanny and him not being a stay at home dad.”
Now I find this personally very reasonable and financially responsible.... but he said I was being too demanding in my wants for a husband along with my life goals and it made me feel kinda like an asshole...
so reddit am I the asshole for expecting my husband to quit his job if he makes less than what it takes to care for the kids before school age?
Disclaimer: this wasn’t the only thing he considered demanding but it was a big part. The other things were I wouldn’t go to the gym *with* my husband because I don’t like to exercise with people (maybe it’s cuz I’m fat but I just like to do that shit by myself). And that I want a husband that’s taller or as tall as me (6’0). And I don’t want him to be fat, because I’m working hard not to be fat and I want a life partner with healthy habits.
Disclaimer 2: I make more than the nanny currently and I don’t expect to change my career drastically within the next 10 years. Earn another degree maybe, but no wild changes.
Disclaimer 3: I’m 23 and single as a Pringle. So these are just future projections.
TLDR; if my husband makes less than we would have to pay the nanny or day care I would expect him to quit his job and be a house dad... AITA?
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
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}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
6dKLhxxThKBgING2Edcv41UwuSw1xZEk
|
awj5jb
|
{
"description": "not being attracted to a man bc he \"seems gay\"",
"pronormative_score": 9,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for not being attracted to a man bc he “seems gay”?
|
I went on a date with a guy last week - prior to the date we had been texting non stop, even talked on the phone for an hour, and I was super stoked about meeting him! Got to the date, and my first thought was “this man is gay.” I should say that am a sexually open minded person, I’ve dated trans and queer identifying men, men who wear dresses and makeup - gender fluidity in and of itself is fantastic and not at a deal breaker for me. But pursuing a man who (completely in my opinion) is not in touch with (my perception of) his sexuality doesn’t feel right. Other than that we had a really fun time on the first date and he wants to go out again but I don’t think I want. AITA for superficially judging this man?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
|
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|
RIGHT
|
l1hQ3VAsWcTG7NwTUvsWRXhNhkNtxdWy
|
b82oks
|
{
"description": "being scared of mentally ill people when I'm mentally ill too",
"pronormative_score": 6,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA when I'm scared of mentally ill people when I'm mentally ill too?
|
So, first off, I have bipolar disorder. It's taken decades of trying, but I'm finally on a med combo that works and I'm fairly stable and high functioning. I have friends that I hang around with that are also bipolar, and attend a support group. I'm fairly active in the community.
​
That being said, I wake up insanely early for some reason. Like 3-4:30am early. I just can't sleep. So I dick around on my phone until Starbucks opens at 5. Then I roll over there and study. There's usually the same people there. Older men on tablets with earbuds in, so it's fairly quiet and usually I can get a lot done.
​
Today though as I was waiting for my drink a grizzled guy started talking to me, asking my name, if I was going to work. Along the lines of "Oh, studying? What are you studying for? Oh to be a nurse? You must like money." Then he started telling me all about him and how he lost his wallet and ebt card, etc. etc. It was embarrassing, because I just didn't want to be put on the spot like that in front of everyone, but I felt like I had to talk to him to be polite.
​
Something was just off in him. He was too wired and loud for that early in the morning. Usually everyone there speaks as if they're in a library. I don't know if he was high or drunk or mentally ill, but something was off. So I grabbed my drink and went to sit down. He sat down too and I thought "oh good, now I can study!" But nope! TJ kept started talking to himself, loudly. Repeating "I'm a bad man, I'm a bad man" to himself loudly. Then someone else came in who he started peppering with questions. Finally they just turned around and walked away. TJ started talking to himself more. I covered my ears with my hands to drown him out.
​
Finally some policemen came in and he made a hasty exit- they were just there to get their coffee- no one had called them.
​
It was a big relief that he had left, but I still couldn't concentrate on what I needed to be doing, so I left too.
​
But I felt really bad. Like should I have talked to him more? Should I have been less annoyed for him spoiling my study time? Should I have been more sympathetic? He didn't seem like he needed help or was a threat to himself, he was just very obnoxious.
​
I don't know. WITA for being annoyed?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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|
OTHER
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
KRazUxfeQCpDxpxfSpMTRpWz2Uon2PEP
|
a0mzju
|
{
"description": "calling my dad out on his BS",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for calling my dad out on his BS
|
My dad and me have had a very rocky relationship. It started when he and my mom divorced. This happened after he moved out of are house 2 days before my birthday when I was 8. From there it snowballed into a manipulative relation ship from his part and me feeling bad for him because of his manipulation to make me think there was something to feel bad about.
Earlier this year I was on our local high school football team. I invited my dad to my first game/scrimmage. He said no for no apparent reason and made the excuse he was busy. I asked him what he was busy with. He came clean and said that he wasn’t he just didn’t want to go because the bleachers would hurt his back ( my father has had 2 back surgeries to fix a problem of his but it still causes pain). I said that was fine because I figured it was a better excuse than most and that he would not come either way. A few weeks later I’m scrolling through Facebook to find he went to his fiancés daughters game.
Her daughter is a cheerleader that is all. I later called him out on it and he responded with his fiancé had bleacher seats. He also said that it was a real game not a scrimmage.
I responded with why couldn’t you come to my game after buying a bleacher seat. He said they where to expensive(50$ for those wondering).
I found this complete and utter bull crap because he lives in practically a mansion house and owned a brand new 1794 truck.
I called him out on this and that because one thing led to another. In the end he called me an over entitled brat for wanting him to come to my football game and stop being a manipulative Pearson.
AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
|
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|
RIGHT
|
bmdiy7MRjPBleFZRJU6Lu7lS7Zso9Sd9
|
au9q7v
|
{
"description": "not paying my professor back",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for not paying my professor back
|
I’m in Spanish 101 right now and am not really looking to buy the book for this class because it’s easy and the book is expensive, but the teacher insists I do. I told him I’m not gonna even if it hurts my participation grade a little and he asked if I could split buying a book with my friend who was doing the same thing as me and I agreed. Next week I show up to class and there’s two books sitting on mine and his desk and the professor tells us he paid $100 each out of pocket to rent those and that we just had to return it by the end of the semester. The problem is he wants us to pay him back when neither of us asked him and I clearly expressed that I didn’t want to (and possibly couldnt afford to) pay for a book. If I wanted to rent a book for $100, I could’ve but I didn’t. Anyways AITA for not paying back, and if so wtf do I say to him to be respectful
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
|
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|
RIGHT
|
aBNFswK8HvrP2BDJjXD4EPYw2760eJ3d
|
b2jfdv
|
{
"description": "hating my friends",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA for hating my friends?
|
I know the title seems heartless but let me explain.
I have 2 friends who I’ve know for 1-2 years, R and D. They’re good friends and we like to joke around a lot but recently they’re behaviors have been getting more and more on my nerves.
Let’s start with R. R has no respect for my personal boundaries and constantly touches me in places which are triggers for me. For the past year I’ve continually asked him to stop touching me but he never listens. I think it’s worth mentioning that I’m trans (ftm) and he’s threatened me by saying he’ll call me by my deadname if I didn’t do something for him. This is a big trigger for my dysphoria and he knows this. When I call him out he paints himself like the victim and says I took whatever he did the wrong way, wether it be him belittling my mental health and making it seem like not a big deal or touching me when I tell him not to, and he rarely apologizes. How hard is it to just apologize and move on, seriously? He does tale it to the extreme sometimes and even went as far as to one time tell me that he should just “stop talking” and I told him how ridiculous he was acting but he didn’t listen.
D is childish and annoying. It’s like he still stuck in elementary school (we’re in high school) and he acts very immature. I’ve only ever told him once to “grow up” bluntly but that was only because he was getting on my nerves. When I do hint that I want him to act maturely he takes it to the extreme and acts like a stereotypical asshole. He also has a habit of running in really stunted steps (basically he barley brings his foot up and drags it along the ground as he runs) and it really annoys me.
I have another friend who’s just a whole other story. He’s all around mentally unstable and ill probably write another post on him some other time.
So yeah, AITA for hating my friends because of their behavior?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
|
{
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|
WRONG
|
7hr8weQihPXAPN9a9u2agZrW5hpZ2ztQ
|
ax9uat
|
{
"description": "being upset that my parents keep forgetting what they owe me",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 5
}
|
AITA for being upset that my parents keep forgetting what they owe me
|
So I'm an adult finishing college, and my parents sometimes struggle to make ends meet. I have no problem loaning them money sometimes, but they CONSISTENTLY forget to pay me back. I feel bad pushing them and I know they have more to be concerned about, but it would be nice to not be met with a "Huh? Didn't we pay that back already?" every time. These are hundreds of € usually and I am a student with no income so it's a large sum of money to me. If I had a job I would have no problem with paying part of my parents' bills.
Additionally it was my birthday in January and I asked my mom for Clip Studio Paint for Christmas. She forgot and they got me something else, so I asked for it again for my bday. They didn't get me anything else on my bday and it's been 2 months, I have reminded them 2-3 times and they haven't gotten to it at all. It hurts a bit to feel like a side thought sometimes. AITA for being upset? Should I be more understanding that they have other things to think about?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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"OTHER": 3,
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|
OTHER
|
{
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}
|
WRONG
|
1BCXlLXCNnNUtYKxfX1ZSsOL9TZgc3OK
|
b1us4e
| null |
AITA for this fan fiction I wrote as a child?
|
This was 8 years ago or so. I was between the age of 11 to 12. At this point I was still new to the internet and in my world things like homophobia and racism didn’t really exist yet. Anyway, I had written a fan fiction for some white band and they were playing football and I had written that one of the characters got so muddy he ended up looking like a black person... TODAY I would have never. I got a bunch of hateful comments about how it was super racist and I remember having to google racism. There was nothing hateful about the way I had written it, it was meant to be a harmless, silly joke. I’m not from America, btw.
Anyway, I didn’t change it, because I didn’t see anything wrong with it and eventually the comments were 50/50 defending me or hating on me. I still wonder tho, was I the asshole? Was that wrong to write? I’m just looking for different perspectives, cuz I can see it from both sides.
(The fan fiction has been made private since)
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"description": "asking a personal question",
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AITA for asking a personal question
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okay.so for context i've been friends with this girl for about a year.i know her friend group but i don't hang out with them
so i saw her holding hands with one of her friends,which i thought was strange because i'd never seen that before and she had called him creepy before and told him she didn't have the same feelings as him.
i asked her over dm's if they were dating and she said no.she then asked why when they hold hands he's being "creepy" and "too touchy" but when i try to talk to her and she avoids me and says to go i don't leave.i never did either and it was my friend who said it was creepy,but she insisted that because i didn't stop my friend from being rude,i was still being rude and compliant.i told her that i'm sorry for my friend being rude and told them to apologize,which they did. i explained that i wasn't trying to be intrusive;i was worried because of the avoidance and curious about why they were holding hands even after she told me she didn't have feelings for him.
was i the asshole by asking????? it was a innocent question but i feel like she took it way out of context and brought up things that i hadn't said and done,to make it seem like i had done something wrong.
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AITA for disapproving of my friend’s relationships?
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TL;DR: Friend started dating a guy three years, four grades below her. I teased her about cradle robbing without knowing thay it actually upset her. We got in a fight and her 28y/o friend stepped in and made everything uncomfortable, so Friend and I didn’t talk for four months.
(Note: this happened awhile ago so the issue is technically resolved by virtue of We Don’t Talk About It, but it caused a huge rift in our friendship.)
At the time of this story, my friend Emily and I are both juniors in high school (17ish). Emily is super into horses and spends most of her out-of-school time at her neighbor’s barn helping out. (Neighbor is 28F and married to Neighbor’s Husband, 38M)
Another guy starts coming to the barn, an 8th grade boy called Mattie. Now Mattie had been held back a year because he briefly lived abroad and ~foreign school systems~ or whatever, so he‘s 15 and should be a freshman in high school. But he’s not. He’s still super in 8th grade.
Sure enough after a few months Emily and Mattie start dating. My friends and I initially make a few cradle robbing jokes because c’mon, but we‘re for the most part cool about it. However, when Emily goes on vacation with Other Friend, Neighbor, and Neighbor’s Husband, it comes up that a friend in out group, June, doesn’t actually know who Mattie is. (She didn’t go to school with us at the time). So within our group chat I was playfully teasing Emily about his age OR SO I THOUGHT when all of the sudden she hands her phone to Neighbor and shit gets real.
Now I deleted the screenshots as an act of goodwill, but I’ll try to paraphrase our conversation below. M is Me, N is Neighbor, J is June. Also J and I are lesbians which comes up in the conversation.
N: I had to take the phone because Emily is so upset during what was supposed to be a relaxing vacation. Wow OP, for someone who likes to think of herself as progressive you sure are intolerant of other people’s relationships!
M: Excuse me? I don’t “think I’m progressive”. Are you saying that because I’m gay?
J: Emily is gonna turn 18 soon though and then their relationship won’t be legal.
N: It’s not because you’re a lesbian, I’m bisexual and I’ve probably hooked up with more girls than either of you! (OP’S NOTE: i am 17. everyone else in the gc is 16 or 15.)
J: that’s really creepy. Why are you bragging about that to a group chat full of teens, aren’t you like 30?
N: 28 actually, but thanks! Also it wouldn’t be illegal for Emily and Mattie to date so long as they don’t have sex. I met my husband when I was 14, he’s ten years older than me. We didn’t get together until I was 19 and we’ve been together ever since!
M: That’s fucking disgusting and it seems pretty pedophillic that a 24 y/o dude met a tween and decided he was gonna marry her.
N: It wasn’t abusive. Love is love, right?
J: Fuck off you homophobic freak.
And that’s pretty much where the conversation ends. I don’t speak to Emily or Other Friend for a week or so, but once school started I send her an apology. I basically say that I was sorry about making hurtful jokes about her relationship and that I didn’t realize they upset her and wouldn’t make comments like that again. I very carefully don’t mention anything about Neighbor because I felt like I wasn’t in the wrong there. I also send an apology that June had written up but couldn’t send directly which said she hadn’t meant to attack Emily and was sorry that she seemed aggressive.
Things go back to normal-ish for a while, but Emily has been skipping out on group hangs on account of being busy. I plan a movie night and as we’re discussing it in the group chat, Emily texts me that she won’t be going if June is there. I’m pretty confused because as far as I know, June apologized and all was well. However, Emily tells me that she never got a genuine apology from either of us because we didn’t apologize for arguing with Neighbor and neither of us admitted we were wrong. (this is why she had been skipping hangs). I tell her that it’s unfair of her to ask that of me and that I would never believe that Neighbor was right and I was wrong.
We get into it a bit more, I bring up that Neighbor was being weirdly homophobic by comparing gay relationships to legally pedophilloic ones, Emily says that Neighbor couldn’t possibly be homophobic because she’s bi and “was a lesbian.” This pisses me the fuck off and I say, “for you to look me in my dyke eyes and tell me im overreacting for being pissed at your shitty friend making homophobic comments is unbelievably shitty” (to which she replies “can you fucking not right now”) and I shut the conversation down.
Four months pass. I act ambivalent at this point because she has to spend more effort to avoid me than I have to to avoid her, but it still kinda sucks. We were best friends for like five years and now our friend group is split down the middle as she won’t go to anything that June and I are at. Eventually she contacts me and we smooth things over with no actual apologies or admittance of wrongdoing, and go back to business as usual.
But I want to know, because it still bothers me sometimes: am I the asshole for unknowingly making fun of something she was actually sensitive about and then shit-slinging with her other friend? Or am I right that it’s weird for an 8th grader to date a Junior in high school and for a 28y/o’s best friends to be some teenagers?
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AITA for resenting my sisters
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I adore my older siblings, but I do hold some animosity for what they did to me when I was younger. I'm the youngest of my full-siblings (I don't live with my half-siblings), so I was an easy target, but I could usually retaliate in some way. When I was about seven though, my siblings and dad were watching Chucky and I was kinda lonely, so I asked if I could watch and my dad agreed, but told me it would be scary and because I wasn't willing to be a coward in front of my siblings, I sat and watched part of it, all I remember was I saw Chucky murder someone and this terrified me, which my siblings realized when I asked my dad to turn it off and seeing as I was close to tears he did, my siblings were rightfully angry about, but left me alone about.
It was around a week later and I still had an irrational fear about the doll and I wouldn't allow the light to be turned off, because I thought he could get me in the dark. I eating dinner and I assume being an annoying little sibling, it was clear my older sisters were getting annoyed and both went to the room I shared with my second eldest sister (it was the largest bedroom) and I followed them, they noticed and let me enter first which I found a bit odd, but didn't really care, until the closed the door and turned the light off, telling Chucky was going to get me and even though I was able to turn the light on, I was still scared and by this point bawling and they only let me out when my dad heard the commotion and went off on them, so they let me out of the room. Unfourtanetly they continued to do this to me when I got on their nerves, or our dad was gone
Even years later I can't have the light off without the door open and the hallway light on, or I start panicking. Both my sisters have apologized, but think I am being a bit of an asshole for holding resentment for it and I starting to think their right, but I still can't shake it off as me being irrational.
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AITA for using my grandfathers computer when my cousin regularly played with it?
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Hello guys, for a little bit of context me and my cousin lived and very near to our grandparents and we always came to them after school as our parents were working. They loved us all equally. So lets jump into the story
Whenever me and my brother came to our grandparents house we would play Roblox \[a game\] together. He was quick-tempered and became angry really fast.
Fast forward to 2 months where I got my laptop damaged in which I played Roblox. So I started playing on my grandparents computer where he also played.
​
We would obviously take turns of one hour each. He would say things to me such as you are stupid,poor and he would also say that I was a moocher at my grandparents house.
I really felt guilty. Am I really the asshole here?
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AITA/am I a bad friend for begrudging my friends their lottery money?
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Title says it all. I played the lottery with two friends; it was my idea, at first they weren't interested at all, but then I convinced them that it would be fun so they agreed. I went and bought our tickets, let them choose and took the remaining one.
They won a significant (but not huge) amount of money, whereas I won a few bucks. Instead of being happy for them or being happy about the money I won, I'm extremely envious about it, especially since they do not want to share with me. I know they don't owe me anything, but I feel just so entitled that money, since basically I'm the reason they have it in the first place. Now every time they tell me about what cool things they bought, I feel resentful towards them (but haven't said anything about it and don't intend to). AITA?
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AITA for my friend making mistakes?
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Basically, my friend and I were on a bus together and she had my crush’s number from being on a group chat with him a very long time ago. I had not added him but rather her and I had permission from the group to do so. She starts texting him weird stuff, keep in mind it’s almost impossible to stop her from doing stuff like that, and I told her to stop when it seemed to be getting out of hand. She did not stop. He was asking her (not very politely) to stop texting her, but she continued because she found this hilarious. I ended up texting him that I was sorry for my friend and that I had told her to stop, but she would not, but he said to her that he never received those messages. So I tried again on WhatsApp later (there’s no WiFi on the bus and I don’t get much data) where I saw that he had blocked me. He also went onto a group chat with a load of our mutual (can’t remember the spelling I’m sorry it’s early: ah-quaint-tans-is) and told me to p*ss off with my friend and to stop adding him to group chats. I had only ever once added him to a group chat and when he didn’t want to be there I never added him again. My friend had added him to another group chat weeks ago but I did not say she should and, yet again, I said not to do this, but she did not listen. Luckily, in the group chat where he told me to p*ss off, I did manage to explain to people what happened but I’m reconsidering whether I am a bad person, because he is half ignoring me whereas before we were really good friends. I will describe what I believe to be his point of view but I don’t know 100%.
His point of view (in first person):
My friend added me to two group chats where her friend got my number. She was texting me in a really weird way and she kept insulting me. She said that my friend tried to text me as well (probably to do the same thing) but I never got the messages so she was probably lying. I had just got out of school which just was the cherry on the cake. I was really p*ssed at my friend for letting her friend do this to me, and so I took a bit of revenge and told everyone on a group chat that she was a bad person to make sure she never did that to my other friends. Now I don’t know how to talk to her because she looks scared around me. Another one of her friends keeps telling me that she hates me, which doesn’t get to me but I just don’t really appreciate it. I know that this girl likes me but geez she was like a creepy stalker. I have blocked her on WhatsApp and now she’s ignoring me a bit in addition to looking scared. I mean, that could be down to a lot of things but I don’t know.
(Keep in mind that his view isn’t perfect because I am not him but I tried to keep this as unbiased as possible)
(Sorry mods I don’t really see anyway to implement paragraphs so sorry)
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AITA for pulling the seat from underneath someone in the bar
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So it's new years eve, alcohol is flowing and everyone's having a good time, I'm there with girlfriend who sees some people she knew from her childhood in the neighbouring booth. Now things are all good, we are having fun and are both intoxicated by British standards (which is like 5 times the socially acceptable amount for Americans), and then one of her friends gives me a nudge and says /u/viralmelon go over there she is being harassed.
Lo and behold, they're a bunch of ugly cunts with even uglier personalities, no sooner I walk over, they start saying things like 'oh yeah he has to be with her' And calling her a slut and saying she's unfaithful, pretty sure they said I was rapey and a paedophile as well as a f*****. I have general anxiety disorder and am incredibly awkward and uncomfortable-looking, they would have a field day with me. Now I've never been jealous in my life and if I wasn't told what was going on I may not have noticed, but I wasn't going to stand there and have the 2 of us be humiliated by a bunch of toothless Neanderthals.
However I'm not the strongest guy, nor was I stupid enough to fight them, so in a flash of rage I pulled one of their seats out from under them as they moved to sit down. The guy landed flat on his ass in a drunken mess.
Now this was a monumental Fuck up, but for a split second I felt like the awkward protagonist of an early 2000s coming of age film. This feeling evaporated as they all squared up to me and told me to go outside, pure screaming at me. This rage was impotent, I just calmly sat down and smiled at them, inside the bar they couldn't do shit.
Afterwards, as we were leaving, we found out they were kicked out of the pub and one of them saw me and punched me in the back of my head. I just walked off and didn't express pain, I was kind of laughing inside.
Anyway we moved to another side and my friends calmed them down, while I briefly felt moderately proud, I'm guilty that I placed my friends and girlfriend in danger cause my feelings were hurt, which is very weak. However, there are too many homophobes and just general degenerates in the world, I figured even if it was underhanded, i dealt a small amount of comic justice.
I just feel guilty for acting like a child, and scaring people by putting myself in danger, afterwards I apologised to my friends and said there was only so far I could go, before it got too much.
So yeah, am I an asshole? If the answer is yes, I'm not a misogynistic homophobe, so there's that.
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|
AITA for not doing the dishes?
|
My mom runs a daycare in our house. When they're napping, she opts to sit in the kitchen and read a book instead of the living room. Fine, whatever.
When I get home, I ask if she wants to go downstairs to watch TV (we have a TV in the kitchen but the chairs are wooden, whereas we have comfy couches and a recliner downstairs). She usually says no because she has trouble with the stairs. I've suggested we put a TV in the living room many times over the years and she always says no. She claims we have nowhere to put it but if we rearranged things, we'd have room. Alternatively, we could just mount it to the wall above the piano. We have a spare wall mount that she bought for my sister's room (but my sister didn't want her TV mounted) and I have one in my room so it's not like she has issues with wall mounts.
She usually ends up doing all of the dishes. Most of them are from her daycare anyway. I do most of the cleaning (her bathroom is always absolutely disgusting - she claims it's used the most but it's not). I got her a Roomba for Christmas because every week she put the vacuuming off until Sunday at 10pm and then would yell because she still had to vacuum. Now it vacuums every night at 9pm so she can't say the vacuuming doesn't get done. Other than that, I clean the bathrooms, vacuum the basement, and dust both levels. Also, every night I take the garbage out, and I do all of the laundry (3+ loads/week) because again, stairs. She does also usually cook dinner, but when we order in I pay 50% of the time. I also do *all* of the shoveling and lawn mowing because of her arthritis.
The other night she bitched at me because I never do the dishes. I told her that's because I take out the garbage, do most of the cleaning, and do all of the laundry. Those are my chores. She says she's frustrated because she feels like she never gets out of the kitchen. I pointed out that there are plenty of other rooms in the house that she could spend time in, but she chooses the kitchen with the hard-ass wooden chairs and that's not my problem.
Also keep in mind that I pay rent (she asks for $150, but since she's on my phone plan it makes more sense for me to just pay that and then pay her the difference than for me to pay her $150 and then have her pay me $50 back a few days later), saved her $10/month on her phone bill by adding her to my plan, and pick up stuff all the time on my way home from work (full time) that I never ask for payment for (she used to bitch because my sister asked for payment so I just don't bother).
I know she works hard, but I do too. My job is a desk job, but one mistake can cost clients and my boss several thousand dollars.
So, AITA for not doing the dishes?
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|
AITA for moving into my boyfriend’s grandmother’s house
|
My boyfriend and I moved into his grandmother’s old house (she died and his parents wanted family to move in) and the rent we pay goes to the house tax and insurance. Mind you, there were several major things i wanted to happen before we moved in. There is asbestos down in the basement, along with a big pile of trash and random things that need to be gotten rid of, the stove broke and needs to be replaced, we currently are still without a dryer and it’s been 6 months since moving in, the fridge is on the verge of breaking down, and my boyfriend’s dad keeps piles of garbage bags full of clothes on the front porch and thinks nothing of it and when we bring it up that we want them gone, he throws a fit like a two year old. Am I the asshole for caring so much about this, even if we have a place to stay and rent is pretty cheap? Or are all these warranted? Oh and the parents think they can let themselves in whenever they please, even when we aren’t here.
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|
AITA for laughing at my wife for being afraid to go into a room at night because a lightbulb is out. (lighthearted topic)
|
(Written on phone sorry for any grammar/spelling issues)
Now hear me out before you immediately say that I am. I NEVER go into this room, it's her room where she does her makeup and such. I didn't know this light was out or I would have just changed it, also my wife can't change it because she is to short to reach
Tonight, before I go into work my wife says she has a chore for me to do. She tells me "I need you to change some light bulbs" and starts naming a few that have been going out. Each light has 2 bulbs so when only 1 goes out I don't usually notice. She continues telling me about that both in her room have gone out and she's afraid to go in there at night (I work late shifts 2 days of the week and over night shifts 2 days of the week) and can't do any of her chores in there while I'm at work (NO I DONT GIVE HER CHORES TO DO). So as she's telling me all of this she has an embarrassed infliction on how she's explaining it to me and I can't stop laughing. She keeps going on about how it's not funny it's serious she doesn't know why I'm laughing because she's afraid of the dark and what if there is someone living in there and only comes out at night and I about cried.
So without going into too much detail AITA for laughing? (more details can be explained if needed, but I don't think I'm totally TA.)
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"description": "threatening to throw the previous home owners mail from the IRS in the garbage",
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|
AITA for threatening to throw the previous home owners mail from the IRS in the garbage?
|
For Context, I purchased a home about 7 months ago. The previous home owner must have owned somewhere around 6 small businesses all related to the oil field. On a weekly basis i bet about 40% of the mail i receive is addressed to one of his many small companies. I have reached out to him multiple times to get him his mail, Ive given it to my neighbor who goes to church with him to deliver it, Ive left it on my front porch and told him its here and looks important and every time he has come and gotten it but now hes getting more and more distant and not answering my texts. I figured he would eventually do a simple mail address change and fix all of this but that hasn't happened even after i have asked him to do so. Now i have mail piling up on my kitchen table that has been here for almost a month, some of which are from the IRS to one of his companies and yet he has failed to pick up. Im getting pretty tired of being his personal assitant for his companies and thinking about throwing all mail from this point forward away. AITA?
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{
"description": "pointing out why my roommate is fat",
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|
AITA: For pointing out why my roommate is fat?
|
So my roommate keeps always going on and on about how I eat "more" than him, and how he "only eats a meal a day" and doesn't get why I'm so thin. In reality he eats 3 peoples worth of food (not trying to be mean, its legit that much) and its all VERY high calorie meals. VS me, where if I do go to Mcdconalds I get like 2 hashbrowns and a soda, and I usually eat a lot of vegetables, rice, home cooked soups, ect.
I've had to start eating a lot better and usually eat multiple very small meals a day. Like one small baked potato and corn, or rice and miso soup. But he still insist I eat more and doesn't know why he's fat.
Finally I had enough and said "Its cause you eat very high calorie meals and a lot of food at once..." and he's been quiet since and just generally moping all day.
He's been the kind of person to play off doctors saying "You need to eat better and exercise" as fatphobia, on seriously. And keeps INSISTING he has chronic fatigue syndrome when doctors keep saying "No you legit just need to fucking eat better and not sit at your desk all day playing WOW!!!!"
He also keeps insisting he's "bit boned" and "just has a bad metabolism." when at this point I don't think that's true. He was a very thin kid before he started sitting inside all day playing WOW and eating food. Who knows, maybe if he worked out, age well, he'd lose the weight drastically.
But anyways, am I in the wrong for pointing this out? My bf (who's fat I might add. more to love) says I'm in the right. And if you're gonna be fat just be fat, don't blame it on shit or BS us with "no I eat so litttleeeee" because We know its not true. But I don't know man. I was a fat kids and am now skinny, but any time I point out weight things to my overweight friends they get pissed and say I "don't get it" and have "thin privilege" (I wish to god I was joking...) and I'm just not sure what to believe anymore.
​
TLDR; Rommate is huffy I said he eats a lot of food at once and a ton of calories even though he eats "one meal a day" vs my "many meals" and how unfair it is I'm skinny.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 5,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 5,
"INFO": 1
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 10,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
yACZvBnWC2i2cTllwoyfPukQ0gxqx7vY
|
ab4b8r
|
{
"description": "sleeping with my neighbor's wife",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 10
}
|
AITA for sleeping with my neighbor's wife?
|
Anywa im 20, and about a yearago, I had sex with a cougar. A married cougar. She was older, i think 38, in that ballpark.
It started off rather innocently though, she'd just make comments as I would pass by her house, like "hey handsome!", and after a few days, I helped her with carrying something in her house, when I did, she invited me for tea. And, after that, she started to invite me over rather frequently, sometimes to hang out. Other times to help with things around the house.
I started to get curious, since she seemingly lived alone. When I asked If she was married, she told me she was, but her husband had been deployed for almost a year and she was incredibly lonely.
She started to get more aggressive with her advances. And she promised she'd keep it a secret if we tried anything. That was all I needed.
We were intimate that night. Needless to say,it was great, most of the women Ive been with were very shy during sex, but she wasn't, she was more of a take charge person during sex. We hooked up a few more times after that, but stopped when her husband came back.
They divorced after awhile.
But, am i the asshole for doing this? I mean, it was an impulse choice, but he kind of chose to join the military and leave her behind like that.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 5,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 5,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 10
}
|
WRONG
|
dVdO5gj09cfRFJXgYXb493IjkqHREHio
|
aowvda
|
{
"description": "telling my so off for being weird about me cooking for his kids",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
AITA for telling my SO off for being weird about me cooking for his kids?
|
Text convo went like this. He usually isn’t so blunt which is why I felt like he was being purposely difficult.
Me: buying groceries for dinner right now (making a chinese food his kids liked at a restaurant but that I’ve never made before)
Him: You aren’t coming over until 2 then i guess
Me: i’m hurrying. Your kids are gonna hate it lol
Him: oh well
Me: Oh well, your kids are gonna hate it?
Him: I haven’t the faintest idea and cannot offer any reassurance. Depends on their mood I guess. You don’t have to get it if you aren’t confident.
Me: wow okay I won’t make it then? What did I do to deserve you being an ass.
Him: I’m not being an ass just saying idk.
Me: alright.
Did I overreact? Or was he being an asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 3,
"OTHER": 3,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
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"WRONG": 3
}
|
RIGHT
|
jr5LrtCtzK3I0jJr2czYzM5lkThhfR2G
|
b36jdq
|
{
"description": "thinking my 13yo daughter should make her own lunch for school",
"pronormative_score": 37,
"contranormative_score": 24
}
|
AITA for thinking my 13yo daughter should make her own lunch for school?
|
I have 2 kids a 13yo and a 6yo. The wife has asked me to make lunch for the both of them. I have no issues making lunch for the 6yo, I feel like the 13yo is old enough to make their own lunch. Now me and the wife are in a little aurgument. AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 21,
"OTHER": 21,
"EVERYBODY": 3,
"NOBODY": 16,
"INFO": 4
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 37,
"WRONG": 24
}
|
RIGHT
|
iCjPTMUecJ7r1DiOcigvEdsVeOhcw38Y
|
a0he1z
|
{
"description": "calling out my ex",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for calling out my ex?
|
Throwaway account for starters (also, I'm a girl). So this all happened within the past couple of hours. My ex, M, and I have been broken up for several months but have continued to be friends and still hang out frequently. When we were dating, there was this guy my roommate was hooking up with who I was friends with who would come over and hang out. For some reason he mainly would talk to me and would purposely bump into me or something and although I could see how it could be taken as flirting, I always thought of it as friendly banter.
M, however, thought it was super disrespectful because it was in front of him and he definitely thought it was flirting. This became a big deal because M grew to hate him and never wanted to be here when he was over.
Fast forward to today, M and I are broken up but still hang out frequently. We were just casually talking when he told me that his ex from 4 years ago messaged him out of the blue and apparently wanted closure on their relationship. However, this same ex has also been married the past year and a half. At first I figured it was whatever, and M and I just continued chatting as usual.
After awhile I asked him if they were still talking and he said yeah and I thought it was kind of strange, given the fact this girl is married and it started with them talking about their past relationship that was years ago. So I asked him what exactly he was doing. Maybe it's just me, but I would't really feel comfortable talking to an ex that's married, especially if our past relationship was what started the conversation. Early in our conversation he had even stated that he wouldn't feel comfortable with his wife talking to an ex she was intimate with if he was married.
So I basically was like, "dude, she's married. Do you not find it weird that out of the blue, 4 years later, she suddenly wants closure? Don't potentially become a homewrecker." His counter was along the lines of that it wasn't his job to make sure she sticks to the marriage and that he wasn't the one that signed the marriage license. At this point I was kind of at a lost for words because to me it basically sounded like he didn't care what happened to this girls' marriage even if he potentially had something to do with it.
To try and keep things as short and to the point as possible, he felt that there was nothing wrong with being a person for her to talk to and that if their marriage doesn't work out then oh well. I tried to explain that he's being disrespectful to her husband and that maybe he isn't the person she should be talking to and that he could be the bigger person and just not talk to her so as to not become a reason for this couple's potential split. Along with this he's said that it's not his job to make sure she honors her marriage, plus he said that he's aware of the possible repercussions to her but that apparently she seems willing to take the risk.
I just feel like overall he's a hypocrite and doesn't care about what he's doing, plus, I feel like he's being even more disrespectful than the guy he ended up hating.
But anyways, AITA?
TL;DR: Called out my ex for talking to his married ex and he doesn't see the problems there.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
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}
|
OTHER
|
{
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"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
StqtZpirWhVvsz1O5xZbnl5ee7XfchVD
|
9w9bgg
|
{
"description": "taking money from my neighbour after she died in 9/11",
"pronormative_score": 13,
"contranormative_score": 13
}
|
AITA for taking money from my neighbour after she died in 9/11?
|
I have never told anyone this. One of my neighbours died in 9/11. In fact, her car had broken down the previous night and I gave her a lift that morning (it was a day off for me), to ensure she was at work ahead of time.
When I found out about the attack, I was heartbroken as she was a dear friend. However, I had finished doing work for her on her house and was waiting for her payment at the time.
I didn't want to be behind, so I went into the house (using a key under her plant pot) and took the money that was owed me. She lived alone and so no-one else knew. I only took the money that was due to me. However, years later I still feel a bit sad.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 13,
"OTHER": 13,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 13,
"WRONG": 13
}
|
RIGHT
|
tkC9beHL5JJLCktgOE9ruRmzjaSgAtB0
|
b5jqtp
|
{
"description": "indirectly hitting a close friend in the head with a water bottle",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for indirectly hitting a close friend in the head with a water bottle?
|
Y’all I know it’s obvious by the title that I fucked up hard, but I can’t tell if it’s YTA or ESH and I wanted to get y’all’s input.
So the story is pretty short, me and two of my friends were fucking around and just like bumping into each other and like pushing each other and being stupid. I accidentally push one of my friends off balance, so he fell on the ground, but he’s okay and we would have laughed it off.
However, he was carrying a metal water bottle and when he fell, it swung over his head and hit another one of my close friends. She’s not very social, but her and I are really close. However, she sped walked away before I realize she got hurt. I was helping my other friend up. She seemed really hurt, and ignored me the first time I tried to apologize. I tried again, and she said “well it’s y’all’s fault for being stupid.” She ditched class after that, and seemed really hurt. I tried to apologize again and I genuinely feel very bad.
How much of an asshole am I in this situation? I know I made a mistake and fucked up but I’m not sure how in the wrong I am.
Also sorry about format I’m mobile.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
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}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
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}
|
RIGHT
|
EB5aBk9IUHwIMxwOT6inLbVlUDB3uFER
|
ac6p8c
|
{
"description": "critiquing someone's Instagram posts, even if they're factually incorrect and could cause harm",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA for critiquing someone’s Instagram posts, even if they’re factually incorrect and could cause harm?
|
For those who don’t know, there was an issue about a number of fake Lululemon Instagram accounts being made. They promised that you could be a Lululemon model if you followed their recruitment account, tagged them in a post and had at least 150 followers. Lululemon has stated that they are in no way associated with these accounts and are working to get them removed.
One of my aquantainces whom I follow on Instagram, who I will call S, made a post tagging a fake Lululemon recruitment account. After seeing it I immediately messaged S to tell them that it was fake. S simply responded “Ok” and I thought that would be the end of it.
Two days later, I saw that S had tagged the Lululemon recruitment account again, and, I messaged S saying “Why are you still tagging them?”
S responded quite quickly “because I can”
I cringed at that and responded “That’s not an argument. You’re implying that there is no harm in tagging them”
“There isn’t”
“There is”
“What is it?”
I gave S a long paragraph but, basically, when you follow them, they follow you back, which allows them to stalk your account. And by tagging them, S might cause someone else to follow them and get stalked.
I guarantee you that she didn’t even read it because after 3 seconds, S replied “O my god. Stop harassing me”
At that point I was starting to lose my patience, so I replied “How is that harassment? You ASKED for that explanation”
She responded with “People don’t like you critiquing everything they do. Mind your own business. I don’t care if it’s fake.”
We’ve argued over this 2-3 times and it usually just boils down to that.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 3,
"OTHER": 3,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 4,
"WRONG": 4
}
|
RIGHT
|
hZFVjoUaP3eRvaeDbU4qHdkCV69MWZkt
|
acx25o
|
{
"description": "not wanting to go to a little brother's birthday when I am unable to do anything",
"pronormative_score": 18,
"contranormative_score": 14
}
|
AITA for not wanting to go to a little brother's birthday when I am unable to do anything?
|
So I'm a young teen and I've recently broken my leg (think full leg cast) and my half-brother's (6 turning 7) birthday party was coming up. The party was going to be hosted at a sort of bouncy house area (lots of big blow-up inflatables). We had already celebrated his birthday with our family at home, this was just going to be for him and his friends.
​
The body of the party is the inflatables, which is about 1 1/2 hours. During this time I was basically just sitting on a bench by myself browsing Reddit. Afterwards, they sang Happy Birthday and served pizza and cake. For a bit of clarity, I really don't eat pizza or cake unless it's a certain type I like (it wasn't).
​
I had wanted to stay at home and just chill, but my dad forced me to come because my little brother would be "upset that I wasn't at his birthday party". The entire experience was very awkward and boring.
​
Am I the asshole for just wanting to stay at home?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 14,
"OTHER": 14,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 4,
"INFO": 1
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 18,
"WRONG": 14
}
|
RIGHT
|
FhxHK9fykz7U25tqRp4cqkRtgKmr1mKO
|
aa0zl6
|
{
"description": "telling my ex girlfriend that cheating is fucked up",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
WIBTA for telling my ex girlfriend that cheating is fucked up
|
My ex girlfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago. When we had gotten together, she cheated on her girlfriend at the time to be with me. This was my first relationship and I didn’t know she was dating someone at the time. Had I had a fraction of the life experiences I gained through the 1.5 years of dating this girl, I would have walked away from the beginning (but there’s no sense on dwelling over something I can’t control). Big surprise, she cheated on multiple times. I’m really caring and nice so I stayed with her despite everyone telling me not to. Recently, she’s started talking to someone or seeing someone. That same person is the reason we are broken up, as he had drunkenly kissed my ex at a party, prompting her to end it with me. On top of all of this, I have plans to hang out with her ex (the one she was dating before me) so we can match up our stories. I’ve heard that she had cheated on her ex despite her adamantly denying she had to me multiple times. I could care less what she does with her life. I’ve blocked her on all social media, deleted her pictures, blocked her number and told her I don’t want to speak to her. But this was all before I learned this new information. So, WIBTA if I were to call her out?
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 2,
"OTHER": 2,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
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}
|
RIGHT
|
oHGrwZMDfAP50KU8TwtBLnfYPLYmNv8q
|
axq20m
|
{
"description": "awnsering a question a student in my class asked",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for awnsering a question a student in my class asked?
|
Al little background: I'm a student in high school and when this happened the lesson was going on. One of the students asked where we could find the homework planner: the teacher answered that she probably put it in the wrong folder(all homework planners are put online in a single folder for every class at my school). She said she would look it up and put in the correct folder if needed.
I had already looked up the homework planner the day before and saw that it was in the wrong folder indeed, so I said this. The teacher said that this was irrelevant and that it was totally unnecessary to say. But I just thought it would be a confirmation that the planner was in the wrong folder and I thought it would be the awnser to the question the other student asked. So AITA for saying something that was pretty relevant from my point of view? Cause my teacher thought I was.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 1
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
DxJxmvWAi8OxVcUgljqSJBvQUgu9X9Ef
|
b68kms
|
{
"description": "not leaving the room when my brother was masturbating",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for not leaving the room when my brother was masturbating
|
This happened a few years ago but still haunts me over who was the asshole in this situation, if anyone. Throw away because...subject matter.
So, my brother and I were both college students at the time. We were back in town visiting my parents. I was feeling ill and left the dinner table early and laid down on the couch. I guess I ended up falling asleep there because I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of my bro masturbating. Now, this was 100% unintentional. He had no idea I was there. I was on the couch in the living room and he was sitting on the floor on the other side of the living room. So I wake up, I'm confused and don't know what to do. Like...I just froze. Fucking...what are you supposed to do in that situation? So I panicked and did nothing. Well. Whatever. He finishes, goes to his room, and scurry off to my room, the end.
It was a few years ago so I don't remember the exact details but I was pissed and told him so the next day, fully expecting him to be like, "oh shit I am so sorry I fucked up I didn't mean to" BUT NO he was pissed AT ME.
My reasoning for being mad: it's not like it was some secret that I laid down on the couch (he was there during dinner when I wasn't feeling well), didn't intend to fall asleep there, and the responsibility is his to make sure there is no one in the room when he is masturbating in a common space?!
His reasoning for being mad: I irreparably (I dunno, maybe an exaggeration...) embarrassed him by not making him aware of my presence and waiting until he finished/left to leave.
My response to that: I had just woken up and freaked out and didn't know wtf to do.
His response to that: I don't remember, but he definitely stood by his position that I was the one at fault here.
For context, I am pretty sure he was in the living room because the internet was super shitty/spotty in his room and was probably watching porn or something. I certainly didn't look, and I don't think he ever specified that this was the case, but that's my assumption.
We both wanted the other to apologize, neither would, our parents started getting pissed that we were having some mystery fight we wouldn't tell them about and ruining family time, eventually we just agreed to never speak of it again and that was that. It hasn't ever come up again in the years since and I love the fuck out of my bro, he's a great dude, and this was a weird blip on our relationship. BUT STILL he was so adamant that I was the ass in this situation and I really didn't think I was, so here I am for judgment. I've tried to represent the events and both sides fairly. So, AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 3,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 3,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 6
}
|
WRONG
|
vJJTKCIsFMEFiNZItOSGMaj2M2QWxP7v
|
a38mfc
|
{
"description": "not going to visit my girlfriend",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
AITA for not going to visit my girlfriend?
|
So today I was supposed to pick up my girlfriend from her mom's and go hang out at her place. I was already iffy about going out since I lost my driver's liscence and would've had to drive out 20 min without one, but against my better judgement i went anyways, because I love this girl and promised her we'd hang out. Anyways, I arrive, and call to tell her i'm here, but she doesn't answer. So I call on another social media, and still no answer... I didn't know exactly which appartment was her mom's, and I have pretty bad anxiety, so instead of knocking on random doors, I just waited in the car.... A few minutes later, still no answer from her, so i wait some more. After 20 missed calls, and 2 and a half hours (no i'm not exaggerating, that's how long I waited outside in the parked car, in the cold), I just said fuck it and left. A few minutes after I arrive home, she calls me crying, telling me she fell asleep (for 2 fucking hours), and that she was sorry and really wanted me to drive back out to go hang with her. Now I'm a pretty patient dude and would bend over backwards for this girl, but I was kind of pissed off at that point and told her I wouldn't see her tonight. Her mom ended up driving her home, but now she's very sad and is sending me messages implying she's sad and crying, and I'm kind of guilt tripping myself into wondering if it was wrong to refuse to see her now.
AITA for not wanting to visit my girlfriend, after waiting 2 and half hours outside her house and eventually driving back home?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 1,
"OTHER": 2,
"EVERYBODY": 2,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 3,
"WRONG": 3
}
|
RIGHT
|
FyscVZOgorK7tUjXpacgQUOEEyc5W456
|
aaivw4
|
{
"description": "not respecting my gf's mothers boyfriend",
"pronormative_score": 0,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
Aita? For not respecting my gf’s mothers boyfriend
|
Am I the asshole? My gf wants me to treat her mothers boyfriend as a father bc she was somewhat raised by him. But I don’t respect him since he is an asshole and doesn’t respect me or her. I tried to respect him but he isn’t a father in any way. I’m using my friends acct to post so she doesn’t see.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 2,
"OTHER": 0,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 2
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 0,
"WRONG": 3
}
|
WRONG
|
NSqBS85sloC7lKSe356HOkBYoqAqnnTx
|
al7mm7
|
{
"description": "not going for a girl that was giving me obvious signs",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for not going for a girl that was giving me obvious signs?
|
This one isn't as intense as some of the other posts I've seen on here but it has been bugging me for a while now and I want to see what you guys think.
​
I have this friend and for this post I'll just call her FF (female friend) and we talked here and there in school but never really hung out outside of it and didn't text each other that often usually for help with homework and projects. One night we started talking and the conversation kept going for hours. Toward the end of the night (pretty much the morning of the next day) I found out from her that she broke up with her boyfriend at the time. Not a lot of people knew they were dating because they kept it low so no one would know, including me. I didn't think that much about it but felt bad for her because I knew her ex and he can be an asshole sometimes. For probably the next week it was constant talking and texting each other until 3 am. We started to hang out outside of school and there were even more obvious signs that she was willing to give me a chance.
​
I knew at the time that she was giving me obvious signs but kept it going. My last 2/3 relationships ended up in me just being the rebound and it made me insecure going for girls that have recently broke up with someone since I think I will just be another rebound.
​
I did think she was pretty and have had small crush on her for a while even before she broke up with her bf. I told my good friend Rob (told me I could use his actual name for this) about everything that was going on. I told him that I was going to wait a week or two more before I actually ask her out on a date. He knew about my past relationships and he understood why I would wait a while. Just like high school is word got around and through mutual friends she found out that I liked her as well. After a couple days she gradually stopped talking to me and stopped hanging out with me and things went back to the way they were before. I found through mutual friends that FF though I was leading her on and that she hated me for it because I knew that she just broke up with her boyfriend. So am I the asshole?
​
​
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 2,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 2,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 4,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
jRt3U1rkJu1t6XZFdsvBtwYyvi6htyBu
|
9vf0ps
|
{
"description": "taking abandoned gas",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for taking abandoned gas
|
Take it easy on me - ltl, ftp, on mobile, etc etc.
So, yesterday morning I'm on my way to class and my gas light comes on, so I pull into a gas station. I'm flustered because it's already been one hell of a morning - running late, screeching toddler in the backseat, rush hour, you get the idea. I'm talking to kiddo (3m) through the window trying to explain yet again that no, throwing a fit does not mean you get candy for breakfast, yes, you have to wait until dinner for candy, no, we don't throw toys in the car. I'm distracted, so it doesn't really click at first why the gas pump won't let me run my card.
I decide it's not worth it, I'll pull around to another pump that has the card reader working, and hit cancel payment. Displayed on the screen: "Please see cashier to cancel prepay." ....what? Prepay? I didn't prepay?
I'm one of the only people there. It's a big station that has 24 pumps, and maybe 5 or 6 are taken. The closest person is several stalls away, so it's not like it was an error where the person on the other side of my pump or the space behind me told a clerk the wrong number. For all appearances, it looked like someone just prepaid for this pump and just.... left. But why would someone do that? My best guess is maybe it was one of those "pay it forward" moments...
Reddit, I'm not proud... but I used the prepay. It was $20 worth, over half a tank for my car.
It's no excuse. I should have gone in and told the clerk, and made sure it wasn't a mistake. But there was no one, and I was in a hurry, and I'm a single mom doing school full time. I'm not proud. But $20 is $20.
Reddit.... AITA for taking advantage of an abandoned prepay?
|
HISTORICAL
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RIGHT
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NGEJR3CpvDq8Afu55FpU1wRUL6GFAHwe
|
a2is90
|
{
"description": "not paying for my girlfriend's flight on a vacation I invited her to",
"pronormative_score": 5,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA For not paying for my girlfriend's flight on a vacation I invited her to
|
I invited my girlfriend (we've been together for about 9 months) to Florida with me during Christmas break, to stay at a condominium owned by my parents. I told her that she would have to pay for her own flight. We are both young and still in school so buying a flight is a rather significant purchase for either of us.
She would rather have me pay for it now then pay me back over time, but to be totally honest I have no desire to do this as it has been a hassle in the past to get the full sum of money I am owed from her.
AITA for this?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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RIGHT
|
EvXoQ7AdYljrnzrXWyJsWayoXB0k5vQM
|
a0bwst
|
{
"description": "wanting to play a fair game",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for wanting to play a fair game
|
This past New Year I was at a party with some friends and one of them brought out the game Scattergories. In short, each person draws a card and puts it in front of them. The card has a symbol and a category, and if you match someone else's symbol you call out something from their category to score.
M matches a symbol with R, and has to call out a "Famous Cowboy" a he says, Dak Prescott. Dak is a football player, not a traditional cowboy, but by all means is famous and is on the Cowboy's team. I thought this was a really fun loophole to get a point.
At this point D says no and denies M the point because she is a huge Eagles fan and will have nothing to that football team. M and I agree whatever it's a game, but we'll keep the loopholes out.
Next I match symbols with R and she has to say a "Monster" to which she says Harvey Weinstein and picks up the card for the point. I think that is a great and hilarious answer and would have been happy to give her the point, but we established a precident. M and I say no that's not a real monster and if M can't call Dak Prescott a Cowboy, they can't call Harvey Weinstein a monster.
We got a look of horror from D and R at the idea we wouldn't consider him a monster. I have no sympathy for that guy and think he gets what he deserves, but I just wanted everyone to follow the rules. Loopholes are allowed or they are not.
It ended with R mockingly saying to D, "Don't worry they're cool guys," and then we moved on. I just wanted it to be fair and came off as a sympathizer to a bad man. Maybe I am the asshole for taking a New Years game too seriously, but I like knowing rules.
Thank you for reading, I accept my fate asshole or not
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
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uCpl2vtC09GLGcvv9ce4mViLSGbDrGX2
|
a7q6rw
|
{
"description": "getting upset at my boyfriend for not wanting to go on vacation",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for getting upset at my boyfriend for not wanting to go on vacation?
|
Hi everyone! My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years, he hates conflict and is generally happy to go along with plans I’ve made (doesn’t force himself to, just is an easy going person). I’m a big planner and want to go on a vacation somewhere together.
He has financial concerns because we have a few bills recently from our cat going to the vet. He makes enough to cover living expenses and food, but barely. We have a travel fund explicitly set for him with $540 in it (only for him because I make enough to have extra / have ample savings).
We had talked about going on a trip to NYC because my friend would be gone letting us stay for free, plus I offered my JetBlue points (I have enough for 2 FREE round trip flights) because I know his financial concerns. We could also use the travel fund for food, etc. He dragged his feet on asking his manager because he was scared and then the tickets were too expensive so we couldn’t go. It then came out that he was also still concerned about finances. This is fine, but it was MONTHS of planning and him saying “that sounds fun” etc. We fought, and he let me know that he’d tell me his concerns in advance next time.
Now anytime I try to bring up travel, he resorts back to “that sounds fun” and agrees with my financial planning (“oh it’s cheap enough you could use the travel fund” “we could stay for free with your parents”) but doesn’t want to commit to anything because of financial concerns. I don’t quite understand these concerns because we have the funds, we can stay for free at places, etc.
So the question is, am I the asshole for getting upset at him for wanting to travel but not committing to anything? I get frustrated because he says he wants to go, and when I make arrangements for it to be financially possible he still has problems with it.
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
|
3RPG4FBOQqXJKbqFiaZcTquR4Dd6x7jS
|
anspol
|
{
"description": "not wanting to vacation with my parents",
"pronormative_score": 10,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for not wanting to vacation with my parents?
|
I am in my 30s, married and have a son. My parents want me and my family and my sister and her husband to rent a condo on the beach for five days this summer. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents and we have a good relationship. But I do not want to vacation with them. Here are my reasons why...
The trip will probably cost about a grand total. This includes splitting the cost of the condo, gas, meals, dog boarding and any planned activities. Could we afford this trip? Yes we could and it's not a terrible deal. But I don't like the beach. I burn easily, sand sucks and gets everywhere you don't want it, I am not a beach person. I don't want to spend $1,000 of our hard earned money on a trip that I am not excited about. Originally they said that we could use their friend's condo for free and we wouldn't have to pay anything for lodging which is the only reason I was considering it. Turns out we can't use it this year.
I have been trying to get pregnant for a while now. Had two MCs last year and my husband and I have been trying again for the past six months. Basically all of my free time is spent thinking "what if I get pregnant" and I really don't want to use a week of vacation when I may need it for maternity leave. It's frustrating for everything to revolve around this "what if" but what if I do need it? We have had full fertility work ups and no issues were found so the chances of it happening soon is very high (fingers crossed).
The week they want to go falls on my husband's and my anniversary. We've had a tough year with the two MCs and our marriage has only gotten stronger. We want to do something for just the two of us on our anniversary. Sleeping on a pullout couch in a condo with my family does not sound special.
Honestly, these are my current reasons but I can't foresee a situation where I will ever want to vacation with my family aside from a long weekend getaway. My parents and sister are great people and I love them dearly. My sister has actually become one of my best friends as we have entered into adulthood. But it's odd to me to go on a trip with my parents as an adult. I have my own family now and want to go on our own vacations. I feel like saying yes now will turn this into an annual thing and I don't want to have this conversation every year.
I know they only want to spend time with us and to take my son to the beach. We live about 3 hours apart and see each other every couple months for weekend visits so we don't spend a crazy amount of time together but it's also not like we only see each other once a year. In theory it sounds like a nice trip, but there are so many reasons why I just don't want to go. My sister and parents are asking every day if I am on board and I don't want to hurt their feelings but I don't know what to say. So tell me Reddit, AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
dXd6Ise7jHRzLdJsgYpieYt5m4RmkGOE
|
aqk4gx
|
{
"description": "absentmindedly making fun of the cashier",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA For absentmindedly making fun of the cashier?
|
So last Christmas season I went to buy groceries and at the checkout the cashier greets me with this bright red spot right on the tip of his nose, I noted this went on thinking about how I'd prepare dinner and what kind of wine to drink when I suddenly catch myself whistling rudolph the red nose reindeer... The cashier luckily didn't make the connection and i stopped as soon as I realized what I was doing.
Still am I the asshole?
Is my subconcious the asshole?
Maybe the person who wrote rudolph is the asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
ChjcbJOGvcK8btNvskv5P6QXLiT1ixUE
|
a7xkx0
|
{
"description": "bursting on2 girls I work with",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 4
}
|
AITA for bursting on2 girls I work with
|
So im M(19) with social anxiety in the Israeli army my job is helpdesk and I got to my new base 1 month ago when i got there i tried to connect with the girls that know each other for almost 2 years
In the begining it all went good than i started noticing they were talking about me behind my back when they don't need something from me they would just ignore my messages
Instead of talking to them because of my f*cking social anxiety I just kept it in until I couldnt hold it in anymore and i just blew on them and told them everything i thought about them and how they behave me (like 500 words ) instead of answering me they just kept ignoring me for 3 hours (even though they read all the messages) until. I couldnt take the stress and blocked them
Ever since whenever we see eachother (which is like 8 hours a day 5 days in week) they just ignore me like I don't exist
I don't know what to do and im really not sure weather im the asshole or they are
Sorry for bad english its not my native langauge and im writing from a phone
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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WRONG
|
9nNOrpNXsvSwI3hMmjSoLWhQEPA5FEhd
|
b941a1
|
{
"description": "not picking up a homemade lunch from my girlfriend's job",
"pronormative_score": 5,
"contranormative_score": 8
}
|
AITA for not picking up a homemade lunch from my girlfriend’s job?
|
I’m sure many of you will think this post is dumb and I am a clown for posting about this, but my girlfriend is so upset I need to know if maybe I am underreacting...
Background: My (24M) girlfriend (26F) have a pretty solid segregation of household chores that works for us, some weeks I’ll do more other weeks it’ll be her. What never changes, though, is that I do all the dishes and she does all the cooking.
Last night GF asked me to take some chicken out of the freezer so she could cook it after our show was over to take for lunch the next day. Show ends & the chicken is still pretty frozen, so GF says she will wake up early (7:15am, when I also wake up) and cook the chicken for both our lunches.
Next morning comes and GF really wants to have sex, I’m tired and really want to shower, but hey it’s sex so of course I comply with her request. After she gets off I let her know that I’m running late for work and need to shower, so I don’t finish, I just run to the shower.
At this point it’s late (around 8:20) and I obviously know it’s impossible for her to cook our lunches before I leave, so I (apparently passive aggressively) ask her if she’s going to cook the chicken and have me pick it up from her job at lunch time.
Lunch time rolls around and GF let’s me know that she had indeed cooked the chicken. I had training for a new product today, basically all day, and was invited to have lunch with the instructor. I tell GF to leave my lunch in her job’s fridge for me to pick up tomorrow instead of today.
SHE GOES OFF. “I was late to work for you” (she gets in around 10am usually, today 11am) “I’m never fucking cooking lunch for you again” “I don’t know why the fuck I go out of my way for you” “fuck off” “don’t talk to me” “get off your fucking high horse”... I’ve not seen her get THIS mad in a while. She even blocked my number for a few hours afterward.
AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
|
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WRONG
|
Z0rSgpAq0GODmItc7wbRlzyMqN6yeW2y
|
aufynr
|
{
"description": "not supporting my bastard brother",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for not supporting my bastard brother?
|
Hello, everyone this is my first time writing something like this so bare with me.
Without a doubt I despise/resent my older sibling who I'll call Zach for now. For years now Zach has been raised like a fucking king by my parents, they always let him off for stupid shit he does, and has grown a serious self centered ego because of this. Zach has always gotten on my nerves and has been a terrible role model for me growing up.
As I get home from school my parents are frantic because Zach's not answering his phone and the truck he uses gone. 2 DAYS later we're eating dinner and the fuck just walks in like he never even left. safe to say parents were pissed and yelled at him for once. Couple months later, my parents, little bro, and I were shingling a clients roof. Mom gets an overwhelming pain in her stomach. We were asked to finish today so dad had to keep working while I resorted to calling Zach to come pick her up and take her to the EM.
He didn't pick up.
A near hour goes by while my mom's crying in pain and he doesn't answer his phone or our house phone. I had to drive her to our house so she could change, holding her hand while driving as her face is beet red. We arrive and I bang on his door cursing at him while mom changes. She was in the ER until 2 am as she was passing large kidney stones, I don't know what would've happened if we were too late but thankfully she recovered.
This fucking guy has gone nearly a year without working with my parents, nearly wasted all of his money by getting takeout with “Jackie” (his gf), and dumped his workload onto me. I had some hidden anger for him but this takes the fucking cake.
Halloween of last year, my parents called me, I go and ask what's up. They give me two photos of an ultrasound. I didn't believe it. I gave it back to them and asked if they were scaring me. They were looking at me with smiles. FUCKING SMILES. Maybe I'm just overreacting, its a good thing to have a child but then I remembered. HE'S ONLY FUCKING 20!
About 1 week ago my parents decided to make a room in our garage into a room for Zach and Jackie. They have been working all week, my parents and a close friend. I'm getting called to help out and notice that Zach isn't with them, he's in his room. He’s watching hulu, in his bed with Jackie. I'm busting my ass to move all the materials into making this room for him and he's not even helping. I sit back in my room while my parents keep calling for me so I tell them to call zach instead. Dad ended up so frustrated that he ended up disconnecting the power so everything was down but for now I have a hotspot.
Am I the asshole?
TL'DR: My brother has always been a pain in my side and has done bad choice once after another to the point where he's going to be a father despite not being able to even legally drink. I've shown no support for him and my parents have asked when I'm going to. Am I the Asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
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RIGHT
|
KJmOcrTvP6hvIUnvIUL7UPUDZyS72Qcz
|
amcoln
|
{
"description": "telling her father she may get raped",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for telling her father she may get raped?
|
So, its been a while since my ex broke up with me but its been eating my mind and no one else has given me good opinion what was right or wrong.
Some background before starting, So we were in 3 year long distance relationship.I had met her whole family and stayed at her home for a week, got lots of love from them and I loved them too. she had stayed with me for 2 months there was up and downs a lot but we made up every time.
Her family was financially stable until her father lost good job after that they were in huge debt. I kept helping her a lot both mentally and financially even my parents agreed to pay for her college but she wanted to do job to help her family and not go to college. I told her she can get good paying job if she goes to college first but she never listened and just wanted to help family.
So, after doing few jobs she got job at a resort and one first day her staff(will call him X) forcefully kissed her, she slapped him few times that's it. I told her to complain to superior but she said she don't wanna create trouble or lose this job. After that, X kept kissing her and touching her whenever he liked and she did nothing, didn't slap him or oppose him, not complaining to superior and kept doing job like its nothing wrong while breaking inside mentally.
After a week I couldn't just watch her like that and told her father that please force her to quit or complain to the superior personally else she may even get raped, even I don't know how far X has gone with her. She got mad at me as she had told me to do nothing and then forced me to tell her father that I have lied about whole thing and make up some excuse else she will hurt herself. So, I did that and after few days of not talking she told me everything has ended and just to forget her.
I didn't even get to have closure or to know anything, If you guys have any questions about missing info feel free to ask. I just wanna know Am I the asshole here?
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
|
YRJZJmVFO5Vj7K6tSHeZS6h52p57HQp9
|
a3mmlq
|
{
"description": "asking someone to allow me to use hotel elevator without key access",
"pronormative_score": 8,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for asking someone to allow me to use hotel elevator without key access?
|
My mom and brother are visiting me here and have a 2 bedroom hotel room. My mom came early and hung out with my 2 kids for the day and checked into the hotel. Its 9:30pm-ish and my mom and kids are waiting for me and my brother to come up to the hotel room.
​
So I go and pickup my brother from the airport. We are both freaking exhausted. We both had long days. We get to the hotel elevator, both carrying luggage. I push the button for the 10th floor and the elevator doesn't move. I quickly realize you need a room key for the elevator to move. I start texting my mom to come down, but she's not responding. I'm pretty sure she's asleep as she has stopped responding to group text awhile back. So we're both just standing in the elevator. It's not moving.
​
All of a sudden two girls show up. Obviously hotel guests. I'm thinking "oh we're way lucky. I'm just going to push the button for the 10th floor after they use their room key to push their room number". This scenario has happened like dozens of times in my experience in hotel stays in the past.
​
Right as the girls start walking in, my brother jumps out of the elevator.
​
I'm shocked and say, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" to him.
​
He says, "It's not right."
​
I start trying to convince my brother to get back into the damn elevator. He's refusing, saying "it's not right." WTF. I realize the girls are just standing there bewildered, so I start trying to explain the situation to them. "Can we please use your room key to get to our room? My mom...."
​
"It's not right." My brother interrupts.
​
"Uhhhhh…..I'm not comfortable...." Girl #1 says. Both girls are staring at me like I'm crazy and about to murder them. Sigh. Frustrated and tired, I give up and get out of the elevator.
​
Me and my brother start arguing and he's like, "We can just go to the front desk and get room keys."
"No, we can't. The room is reserved under mom's name only. Not ours. And I'm pretty sure she fell asleep! We could have just pressed the elevator button right after them without even saying anything!"
​
"It's not right. We cant do that. It's not rig...."
​
Just then, some guy shows up to use the elevator. I quickly follow him into the elevator, leaving my brother mid sentence as we are arguing. Surprisingly, my brother quickly follows me into the elevator as well. I push the 10th floor right after the guy uses his room key.
​
We get to the hotel room and of course my mom was asleep! My son answered the door.
​
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
cxCmREAuqwjNofCrfZ0nbVQnYIKI3Z9F
|
b4zv91
|
{
"description": "being tired of my best friend",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for being tired of my best friend?
|
(throwaway account)
My best friend (BF) and I have been friends since 4th grade. Ever since then, a lot has happened - she changed schools, moved away to another state, college, etc.
The thing is, BF's life is slightly messed up. Absentee dad caused her parents to live separately for a long time finally leading to a divorce. She then moved away with her mom and brother to live with her uncle to cut back financial costs.
Ever since the move, her life has been a roller-coaster. In many cases she has been enjoying her life - especially academically (compared to me) but her home life is a little sadder compared to mine because her uncle is often an asshole.
Because of the uncle, she finds her home life to become difficult because she finds the uncle to be pretty controlling. Alot of times I've agreed because he does sound a little harsh, BUT he's the sole earning member of her family (which is her, her mom, her brother, her grandmother, the uncle and his wife and three kids) so I mostly try to understand if he says something strict. There's some sound reason behind it.
Whenever something like this happens, she complains to me about it. I always try to reason it out and make her feel better or give her solutions or some help.
Alot of our conversation topics are related to some problems she's having either in school or life.
Over time, I personally believe we've grown apart. I definitely love her and care for her, but I've made newer friends and grown closer to my existing friends. So has she.
I also think she finds it difficult to believe that I've changed. I'm more of a 'out of sight, out of mind' kinda person so I kind of get how she could've sensed that I'm a little more distant.
But I feel like I'm her agony aunt or something. Because of her stressful life, I've always told her to rant to me whenever she feels upset because going to a therapist isn't a really viable option for her, but now I feel really tired.
I love her (not so much as I used to if I'm being honest) but I'm trying not to invest myself too much in her problems because then I get affected too.
Also, when I was going through some tough shit and was seeing a therapist, if I called my BF for help, it wouldn't be too great. She's not the best consoler to talk to when crying.
And, ever since we've started college, I've made new friends who I like alot. Because we're in same classes I talk to them more. I think because of this I've been neglecting her a little which also makes me feel really guilty.
A few weeks ago she asked me if there's something between us that has changed. I fibbed and said that it must be stress (we're having tests and shit) because I don't want her to know how I feel - her life is stressful enough. (No one likes to find out that their best friend might be tired of them.)
So, AITA for feeling tired and distant from my best friend?
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
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RIGHT
|
xbi8XoA2QvhNULsIO9ocNRzV7K3Ich9z
|
aygida
|
{
"description": "not wanting to celebrate my sisters birthday",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for not wanting to celebrate my sisters birthday
|
I [19M] have an older sister turning 30 in just a few short days. i don't really want to celebrate it and i told my mom this and she said i should quit being an ass and that I shouldn't ruin my sisters birthday with my attitude
am I the asshole? my older sis and I used to be real close. but shes kind of become a huge spoiled brat over the years. we both with my mom and my mom works 1 full time job and a part time job to support them. my sis has never had a job ever and brags about how she never has to work even though my mom's getting kind of old and even with her 2 jobs she struggle to pay bills. my sis stays at home and cleans and stuff but complains about it all the time. I told her if she hates it so much she can get a job and do something but she literally refuses. she spends what little money my mom has on dumb shit and wonders why my mom gets pissed.
my sister, who is turning 30, will literally throw temper tantrums and will pout if things don't go her way. it can seriously last hours or even days. she lies, constantly, about anything she can. she's a habitual liar (I used be too but I'm trying really hard to work on it and be more honest and open).
I'm not perfect either, I don't have a job right now because I'm a full time student (my sis isn't. she doesn't want to go to college/they can't afford it) but I have had jobs in the past which is how I'm even affording being a student (I paid for everything myself). other reasons i suck:I'm a slob, I'm lazy, I smoke a lot and I still sometimes lie about dumb stuff. I probably contribute daily to the mess my sis cleans up.
it frustrates me that my sister acts like a spoiled toddler but she's still family. birthdays are a huge thing for all of us but I just can't bring myself to care about hers this year. my mom says I should suck it up and be nice to her and not ruin her birthday for her. I do feel slightly like an asshole if I hurt her feelings (especially on her birthday), but like a justified asshole?
AITA?
tldr; I've got a spoiled brat/drama queen for an older sister, her 30th birthday is coming up. mom said I need to be nice to her and not ruin her birthday
oh and I live in New Mexico.
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
lp6m1SyoPitRIsTgYJqNWVzGQBJDVrXA
|
b52ngu
|
{
"description": "turning ex's friends against her",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 3
}
|
AITA for turning ex's friends against her?
|
So about a month ago my gf of 2 years and I broke up. Her friends came to me asking what had happened between us, claiming a story completely different from what had happened. So I went through the details of how she had emotionally cheated and broke up so she could have sex guilt-free because she wouldn't technically be cheating. I showed some texts I'd gotten from her to prove my point when they wouldn't believe me. Since then most of her friends have turned against her, and my ex hits me up calling me an ass, and that it was none of my business what she'd been telling them, and that I should've just dismissed it. I get that if I hadn't told her friends what had happened (and to be honest, I did include some personal, intimate details) then she wouldn't be getting so much hate for her actions. I know that the way I displayed my viewpoint to them was filled with a lot of spite, and my personal hope is to ruin her life the way she did mine (she quite literally gave me a mental illness and some issues and habits I won't include here). I don't really care that she thinks I'm an ass, but it got me thinking about the issue.
AITA for turning my ex's friends against her by telling them about her cheating and abuse? Or AITA because of my motivations for doing so?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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OTHER
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|
WRONG
|
cdrKnT04kq3iNKoe5BokbEunVcUDmiMc
|
b28qlo
|
{
"description": "not paying the full price of attending my friend's bachelorette",
"pronormative_score": 8,
"contranormative_score": 11
}
|
AITA for not paying the full price of attending my friend's bachelorette?
|
My friend had her bachelorette a couple weekends ago. The two ladies organizing her bachelorette sent out an email about the bachelorette in September (6 months prior) asking us to RSVP. I initially said I could go, but between September and March my work schedule changed (which is not unreasonable I don't think?), and I was only able to spend the Saturday night instead of both Friday and Saturday. I emailed them a few weeks prior to the bachelorette about this (even though I hadn't heard from them at ALL yet), and I got no response. Five days before the bachelorette, I got an email detailing the entire weekend and the costs, which amounted to $430 per person, for approximately 15 girls. I told them I could only make it the second night, and they said that since everything was already booked, I would have to pay for the AirBnb, bus and driver they rented out for the weekend, the prix fixe wine tasting and luncheon on Saturday afternoon (which I couldn't attend). They were able to exclude the cost of some miscellaneous items (not sure which) but that I would still need to pay $370.
Am I being unreasonable in thinking that paying $370 for one night (which basically included dinner, a bus taking us to and from the club, and a bunk bed for the night) is WAY too much? They didn't consult us at all about costs, or what we would be doing, etc. in the six months between the invitation and the email outlining the event. I emailed her back saying that I was surprised at the costs, and I offered to pay for the AirBnb, (because obviously they had to book a house big enough for everyone for the whole weekend - they weren't going to get a new AirBnb the next night to accommodate changes in numbers), the private bus (even though it would've been WAY cheaper to get Ubers) and the Saturday night prix fixe dinner. She responded saying that they already paid for everyone's wine tasting and luncheon ($150) on the Saturday morning/afternoon, and that it would be unfair for her to absorb the costs because I RSVP'd initially. The poor bride got sucked into it, because she then ended up texting me separately asking me what the problem is, etc.
Am I being an asshole here?!
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
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WRONG
|
7ik4h6sfeXTJTxcEuEdBhiLscq73AYh3
|
ajrnrh
|
{
"description": "wanting to spend more time with my girlfriend",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for wanting to spend more time with my girlfriend
|
Well, I don't know if girlfriend is the right word anymore. We have a highly romantic and sexual relationship and she's even called me her boyfriend before but now she just says I'm a friend.
She's been spending a lot of time with her friends over the past few days and she's been saying shit like it's the first time in years she's been happy. I'm fine with her having friends and hanging out with them but whenever I suggest hanging out she always declines because she has plans with her friends and when I confront her, she says I'm creepy and obsessive. My friend thinks she might be hiding something but I don't think so. Sorry if my grammar is bad
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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OTHER
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
murWU3pdOO4EDWbMiI1fZq1N8Hs1HIcB
|
b3dfbz
|
{
"description": "stopping at a blinking yellow traffic light and flipping off another driver",
"pronormative_score": 5,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for stopping at a blinking yellow traffic light and flipping off another driver?
|
Today, while driving home from work, I was approaching an intersection on a side road with a blinking yellow light. I know this means “yield” not “stop” but I’ve been through the intersection before & it’s never been a blinking yellow so my initial thought is that the stoplight isn’t working properly. Since this particular intersection has a blind left turn, I slowed down significantly (almost stopping to peek around the corner) to make sure no one was coming from the other direction even though the stoplight gave me the right of way. I just didn’t want to wind up t-boned because an overzealous left-hand turn.
As I came to the rolling stop, the gentlemen in the car behind me decides to lean on his horn, excessively so. Not just the quick tap of the horn to remind you the light has changed but the “how dare you drive so horribly, asshole” beeping. I get through the intersection & he continues to beep so now I’m a little peeved. When he finally passes my car, my road rage gets the best of me & I flip him off.
Unfortunately, we’ve now approached another intersection & the light is red. So he then proceeds to stop about 15 yards short of the car in front of him so he can line up with my car & share a few choice words.
He yells that I’m “not supposed to stop at a fucking blinking yellow light” to which I responded “It’s not usually like that...there could have been a car coming, asshole.” So he said “go back to driver’s ed dumb bitch!” and drove off.
The whole interaction really pissed me off because I felt like I had done the right thing by slowing down (not necessarily the textbook choice but given my familiarity with the road n’ such, a logical choice) & I thought the other guy was being a TOTAL asshole.
I talked about it with a cousin and he said the guy wasn’t really an asshole because I *hadn’t* been following the traffic laws and I had just decided I knew what was best despite being familiar with the road rules. He said I also could have caused an accident by improperly slowing down at the intersection.
TL/DR: Guy excessively beeped at me for stopping at a blinking yellow (with good reason) . I got pissed and flipped him off. We exchanged words where he gets called an asshole and I get called a dumb bitch.
So, AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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|
OTHER
|
{
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|
WRONG
|
pZxWTan5SYsK4FgBXUlkRJuYkBZ1hUbz
|
b44rno
|
{
"description": "using the Table for its Purpose",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 14
}
|
AITA for using the Table for its Purpose.
|
So let me start this by saying that I (21M) have been with my Girl (21F) for around 18 Months now.
We have a relatively okay relationship, I feel like it may be on the down fall as instances like the below, seem to be happening more and more.
So lets just jump to the thing that happened that has me Questioning whether I was the Asshole or not?
​
So me and my Girl were watching TV, chilling on the sofa. She does this thing where she will lay her legs over my knees and sort of dangle her feet on the edge / near the Coffee Table. Now this Coffee Table had a Drink that I had just made for myself plus a Rolling Table for my Weed which had some already grinded out, ready to make my next Joint. My Girl who decided she was no longer Comfortable, kicked her legs off mine.
As she kicks her feet off of me, she kicks my drink over, manages to spill the contents all over the table (Weed included) and smash the Glass in the process. So as you can Imagine, I'm Pissed that my weed is now fucked and that there is glass and Fizzy pop everywhere. I rather angrily say "This is why you dont put your feet on the table/over the table, because shit like this happens". She then gets defensive and says "If you didnt leave your Glass near the Edge, it wouldnt of got knocked over"
​
This comment has me Fuming, Are you actually Joking? I put something on the table, regardless of whether its in the middle or on the edge, because its a Table and that its purpose is. Its not a bloody Foot Stool for your feet.
Anyway so the outcome to this was that we didnt speak to each other for a couple of Hours. She feels that she did nothing wrong and im just being Shitty. She hasnt even apologised for knocking the drink over, let alone for ruining my weed. I just want to know, was I the Asshole for having a go at her? or was i justified in my doing?
​
|
HISTORICAL
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AUTHOR
|
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}
|
WRONG
|
ab3xJMF8n4m4mgQwxBcq6nxwuTBUXGql
|
a5oglp
|
{
"description": "hitting my mom on the forehead",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for hitting my mom on the forehead?
|
I had a violin recitial and I had come there to warm up with the group, and then wait for concert time. After warming up, my mom wanted me to continue warming up but since no one else was, and I didn't want to, I told her no. She kept on badgering me to practice until I decided to go into a room to keep her from bothering me. I was holding the door shut while she was trying to open it, and in my infinite wisdom, I decided to open the door so I could run out. She was pulling on the door as I pushed it, so it slammed on her forehead where it started bleeding. She then had to go to urgent care and had to miss the concert.
AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
WRONG
|
noFYSpixOHcyuNoDTNl7Mi4Lm99la2kq
|
atvtuy
|
{
"description": "getting angry about being left outside a club",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for getting angry about being left outside a club
|
I'll try and keep thing brief cause my other post was too long
​
I hate going out. Every single time I've been assulted - kissed against my will, grabbed, creeped on, touched etc, so I just don't go out.
​
However, it's my universities O week so I decided that I would go out with some of my new friends to a couple bars and have fun. I was sober D so while I didn't drink I did have a pretty good time.
​
Until, after deciding to get some food from a nearby McDonalds with a friend, we decided to leave. We went back to the bar to find them and I waited outside while he went in cause I've hurt my leg and didn't feel like trying to navigate a packed bar of drunks. I also didn't expect to be waiting that long.
​
However, my friends decided that he wanted to dance a bit more and told me he would be staying for a while. Okay, I'm not happy with this as I am already scared being outside alone even though I was near the security guards in a lit area, but, I decide sure whatever, he's having fun, I can wait a bit longer.
​
Not even 2 minutes after that decision a lot of loud aggressive people show up and are denied entrance to the bar which freaks me out as the loiter a bit nearby me. They move off, but now I'm really on edge and just want to go. Then again, a minute later, a very drunk man who was denied entrance several times started to talk to me, and started leaning on me heavily, trying to make me look at him etc. I move off and stand just inside the bar by the guards scared out of my mind, unable to actually reach him cause of the amount of people around me.
​
Friend shows up and as we walk to my car I have a go at him saying that I didn't like being left outside and that he shouldn't have changed the plans like that when we didn't have very good contact with each other, and that I had been terrified.
He apologised, and I appreciate that, however, due to me being fully drained and very close to a meltdown I didn't really talk on the way home which I don't think he liked.
He started saying I shouldn't have gotten so angry, and at least he waas honest etc.
​
Now it's about 45 minutes later and I've been home for a while and I feel like shit. I'm thinking I shouldn't have been so angry, and that he's right and I am overreacting, and that this is a situation I put myself in.
​
So Reddit, I think I ATA, what do you think?
|
HISTORICAL
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OTHER
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RIGHT
|
nG1jnclWi3Tji9paboe2jxlyxm6GQBPI
|
adqhiw
|
{
"description": "telling people to do their own research",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 5
}
|
AITA for telling people to do their own research?
|
So this scenario happens with multiple people and it really pisses me off. The basic premise is that a friend or my gf will have a problem, and I would try to help with what I know. Then I would get asked more and more questions, as if I'm suddenly an expert on every topic. Then I would tell them I don't know and to do their own research, which results in a passive aggressive "ok I'll figure it out myself".
Seriously this just makes me boil. We're in 2019 and people still don't understand to fucking Google their own questions and finding solutions online. I try to help and suddenly I'm responsible for fixing your problem? How fuck do you think I solve my own problems? Fucking Google.
So AITA for telling people to basically research online?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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"OTHER": 4,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
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}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
WRONG
|
ErVdAPsV8xKzidU19C5kCq8WM47uitSy
|
aidl4v
|
{
"description": "wanting time apart from my boyfriend",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for wanting time apart from my boyfriend?
|
I (23f) knew my boyfriend (21m) for 9 years before moving across the country to be with him. I got my own apartment. He lives with his sister (25). We have been together in person for 7 months now and we have been spending a lot of time together. We spend nearly every night together and he stays at my apartment. 2 nights a week we stay at his apartment. He used to be very close to his sister and since he and I have been dating he is not as close with his sister anymore. This past weekend we have not seen each other for 3 days due to conflicting schedules. He said that this time apart made him realize that he spends so much time at my place because he hates his apartment and just don't care to be there. That since I came we just had so much history and background that we got super intense super quick. He said that this isn’t a bad thing, it’s good actually but yesterday he had to ask his sister what was going on in her life and she had to ask him too, and he feels like they just lost the connection they had. On top of that their refrigerator is empty af. He said he spends so much time at my place bc his place is loud and everyone above him is stomping and having parties. But he realized yesterday that in doing that he’s just kind of stranding his sister to deal with it all herself and that that’s not fair. Now he no longer wants to sleep over at my place. This hurt me a bit and I told him maybe it’s for the best that we spend some time apart. That tonight we can hangout as planned but after that maybe we just need some time apart from each other. I told him I understand completely about his sister. AITA for asking for some time apart to take a step back from our relationship? I thought this is what he wanted anyway, to spend more time with his sister. I am just confused on what he wants me to do and I feel I’ve grown so dependent on him that I need to take a step back.
TL;DR my bf is very close with his older sister and no longer wants to sleep over my house so he can spend more time with her. AITA for wanting time apart to distance myself from the relationship as I’ve grown very dependent on him?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
|
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|
RIGHT
|
b9gFuQ6yLSwQS8EXEsStTRsqgtFSxzZO
|
affgiz
|
{
"description": "practically ghosting a friend because she was a flake with our plans and didn't responded to my text after three days",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for practically ghosting a friend because she was a flake with our plans and didn't responded to my text after three days
|
She confessed to me that she was gaining a lot of weight because she was eating uncontrollably and that she was getting depressed because of it.
So I encouraged her to get fit and made plans with her to go running 3 days a week, we sorted out our schedules so we both have the time to exercise and compromise.
We decided to walk and run progressively so she didn't burn out, I offered her to drive in my car to a mountain 20 minutes out of our town it was a nice place and a lot of people were there to exercise.
We did go one time and after that we made plans to go again in 3 days, the day before she texted at 3 am to tell she wasn't going to go, fine I told her it wasn't a problem so we reeschudule. And again at the last minute she told that she couldn't make it, after rescheduling for a third time she did it again but the day before she texted me saying she had a headache so wasn't going, I texted her to rest and if she was feeling well to text me so we could go, and she didn't in fact she didn't have the courtesy to let me not that she wasn't coming and ignored my texts when I texted if everything was alright for 3 days, she later told me she was sick because of her period but I was tired of her excuses and flaky behavior and stopped talking and texting her.
So Am I the asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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OTHER
|
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|
RIGHT
|
pOqjUWHi8VUImCuSN7jD9aZGzVy93erU
|
b4psom
|
{
"description": "telling a friend that another friend isn't comfortable with their constant physical affection",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for telling a friend that another friend isn't comfortable with their constant physical affection?
|
First time poster warning.
One of my friends seemed to always be unomfortable with physical touch and always looked disliked it. Unless friend would intiate it. The problem was that another friend, (I'll refer to her as K to avoid any confusion) was very into physical affection (hugs, in your space, shoulder touches). K would often hug my friend who always seemed to be a little distressed whenever it occurred. K and friend were friends, but friend was too nice to tell K that their affection made friend uncomfortable.
K happened to hug friend and I made a comment about shipping them since I often do make comments like this as jokes. I think I made Friend even more uncomfortable(in hindsight I probably shouldn't have said that) and once K left, friend started to complain slightly how K always invades their personal space but doesn't want to be mean and tell them that they don't like it. So I went up to K, while friend had a look of 'wtf are you doing' and said something along the lines of 'Friend gets uncomfortable when you hug them'. K just looked at friend and said ok. When I went back friend was super distressed about it. Friend asked me why I would do that and now friend and I both will look like assholes. Friend also said that I shouldn't have stuck my nose into their business and that they'd just get used to it despite how uncomfortable it made them. Friend has been avoiding K since I told K about their discomfort and I can't help but wonder if I damaged Friend and K's friendship. So Reddit, AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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|
AUTHOR
|
{
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|
RIGHT
|
53M1EVNNmEuSP1IFAJXNqiMiJlQeUcJw
|
9thkao
|
{
"description": "taking screenshot of raunchy dating profiles and sharing them with friends",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for taking screenshot of raunchy dating profiles and sharing them with friends?
|
Usually women with their asses hanging out, general trashiness, ridiculous profiles asking for money, sugar daddies, etc
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
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OTHER
|
{
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|
RIGHT
|
W1bWldDgxGuBDsY0ypW0XIJ3TWobVJH9
|
a83ta2
|
{
"description": "asking someone not to park in front of my house",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for asking someone not to park in front of my house?
|
I live in the first house on a private drive that is maintained by HOA. The way it works is everyone in the HOA pays dues and then all of us that live on the multiple private drives pay an extra amount (usually more than the overall HOA dues) that goes into a private drive fund to pay for repairs, plowing, etc. of the private drives. Since I'm the first house on the private drive, in front of my house is a no parking zone because there's a stop sign where the private drive ends into the county owned public road cul-de-sac.
Often times someone visiting one of the houses on the cul-de-sac will park in front of my house. It makes it more difficult for me to back out because it's hard to see around the car in that direction and forces me to make a multi-point turn when I'm backing out of my driveway. Anyways I normally don't really care because usually the car is just there for a short time and hey if it's closer than a legal spot so you don't have to walk as far go for it.
Lately though there's been 1 car in particular that will park there on Thursday night and leave their car there until late Sunday or Monday. It's just kinda annoying and I feel like if you're going to leave your car there for several days you should park it in a legal spot. It's also annoying because it feels like I'm paying an extra couple hundred dollars a year just so someone not paying can park there whenever they want. So today they happened to be sitting in their car waiting for the neighbor they're visiting to come home and I said "Hi, I'm not asking you to move or anything, just in the future if you're going to leave your car here for a while can you park it somewhere else?" She replied with "What's the problem?" and I just said that it makes it more difficult to back out because I didn't want to get in to telling her it's no parking and a private drive an all that. She just said "well I won't be here for a while" and rolled her window back up.
It seemed pretty clear she didn't take my request well. So was that an asshole move?
|
HISTORICAL
|
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AUTHOR
|
{
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|
RIGHT
|
re5wifNuPwwwUKpscGN76WMyTMo0mmkw
|
b8tq3f
|
{
"description": "telling my best friend she shouldn't adopt children",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 8
}
|
AITA for telling my best friend she shouldn't adopt children?
|
My ex best friend (female) and I (also female) had been friends for ten years. I had never had a true best friend before so I kept hanging on, despite the fact that she didn’t always treat me the best. For example, she never supported the relationships I was in and she would poke fun at me for gaining weight off and on.
When we hung out, it was always where she wanted to go and we did what she wanted to do. She loved going to clubs but it wasn’t my thing. When guys would approach me, she’d tell them to get lost because we were having a girls’ night. I didn’t mind chatting with them but she would be annoyed that I was giving them the time of day: “They only want one thing. Quit wasting your time.” (She always considered me a bit naïve in the guy department.)
When my boyfriend and I started getting serious, he said he wanted to meet my best friend. We decided to meet up with her and her new boyfriend. Afterward, my friend called to tell me that her boyfriend said he once bought drugs from my boyfriend. I told her I didn’t believe him and her boyfriend told me the story. I was taken aback and asked my boyfriend about it. He said no, he’s never sold drugs and had no idea what her boyfriend was talking about. My friend was adamant that her boyfriend was correct and that I shouldn’t be dating a drug dealer. (Her boyfriend is over here buying drugs and my boyfriend is supposedly the problem? Also, my best friend used to have a drug problem and had to drop out of college as a result. I’m not sure if she was using again at this point.) She never wanted to hang out with my boyfriend because he’s supposedly a drug dealer and, obviously, she didn't approve of the relationship.
Months later, my friend came out as a lesbian. (When we first met, she told me she was bi but preferred women.) Her new girlfriend never wanted to meet me because she has jealously issues and didn’t think we should be friends. We hung out alone without our significant others and could never get together as couples. It was also weird that, as best friends, we couldn’t talk about our significant others since they didn't like us as individuals.
At some point, we’re chatting on the phone and my friend states that she wants to adopt a child. I’m not sure where this was coming from since she’s never expressed interest in having children, didn’t have a stable or well-paying job, just started dating someone new (the girlfriend that doesn’t like me), etc. Taken aback, but still annoyed about the whole significant other situation, I blurted out, “But gays shouldn’t adopt children!” I have no idea where that came from and I certainly did NOT mean it or believe what I said. I don’t really remember how the conversation ended but we haven’t talked in years as a result of my comment. I tried to reach out to her but she wasn't interested in maintaining our friendship.
AITA or was our friendship doomed anyway?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 4,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 4,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 8
}
|
WRONG
|
VAwACI2aFwqTYaMJylxnu5Q8xT5k2LzA
|
alknlw
|
{
"description": "muting others to end an argument",
"pronormative_score": 0,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for muting others to end an argument?
|
Me and one other kid in a discord always argue back and forth over stupid things because he takes a lot of it away too personally. After the argument was entirely resolve, he acted like he didn't partake in it and was a third party just watching the conflict. To prevent another petty argument, I muted him and when other people in the call argued that it was equally petty to not hear him out on why he wasn't part of the argument.
AITA for muting him in order to avoid another petty conflict?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 0,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 1
}
|
EVERYBODY
|
{
"RIGHT": 0,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
WRONG
|
Iw19mSpr2O2Kbf7nchkgKUQgJ678ELaC
|
avycig
|
{
"description": "tipping really well the first time I vist a place I know I'll be a regular at",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA i tip really well the first time i vist a place i know I'll be a regular at.
|
Basically as simple as it is, I tip really well the first time a vist a new bar or restaurant or anywhere that takes tips (40-50% ) in the hopes that every time I go in I get better service .
(Side note I usually tip 25-35% almost every time, unless it was absolute horrid service controllable by the staff)
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 1,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
RIGHT
|
6txyaaeIv1q8txVhszjCqKP28FGJhtte
|
aksqq5
|
{
"description": "wanting my friend to include my other friend",
"pronormative_score": 0,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for wanting my friend to include my other friend?
|
In this I am "Sky" and she is "Madi" and this argument is about my friend Jen. The other people mentioned dont matter that much. Im just gonna copy and paste the discord convo but if you want me to email you screenshots or something then I will. Also if you have questions or are curious about something, please ask.
Sky 09/29/2018
With all due respect, I really don’t think it’s nice to uninclude Jen. She’s one of my best friends at the moment and I really don’t think what you’re doing is nice. I’m sorry if this makes you hate me too, but if Jens not coming, I don’t think I want to be included. I just can’t respect that you would uninclude a friend this way, it’s not cool to me. I get you’ve had arguments, but is she not still your friend? You invited her to your birthday party, you sat with her at lunch, and now your casting her out cause of your silly fued? That’s uncalled for. If you want to invite me back, add Jen first. Then, I would absolutely love to go camping with you.
Madi 💕09/29/2018
I guess good for u and all but id rather not spend my time with someone who knows nothing about me but continues to talk about me like they do. Notttt into that at allll. And I actually consider u a friend while i thought jen was for about 2 seconds but was civil cause i didnt want to break the group chat so i kind just delt with it. But then they talk about Alexa in a bad way when they dont know what they r talking about and then they try to talk about ME like im a 2 faced bitch when i have literally never done that??? And like i like u as a friend but i dont like jen and if u cant be friends with me because u feel that me not liking someone’s personality is too much then i guess thats sad but ill have to deal with it
Sky 09/29/2018
First of all,, did you seriously just call toast by their real name when you know full well that toast goes by toast because of gender stuff?? Like, they’re your best friend?? Seriously??? Like I’m not even that close with toast but when I talk about them I call them by they/them and by toast because that’s the name they wish to be called. Second, Why the hell would you pretend to be friends with Jen if you didn’t like her, Like even when she’s not at the school anymore? Just break it off with her if you don’t like her. Plus, you can still be friends with m e even if you don’t like my best friend, I don’t care. But my view of it was that you were purposely avoiding your friend cause of a feud, which is uncool. I want to be your friend, and I’m going to continue to invite her to hang out with us. Because she’s not just my friend, she’s also friends with maverick and Ryan. Also, you don’t want to break up the group yet you uninvite jen while still inviting mav, me, and Ryan? How do you think that makes us feel??
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Toast is fine with being called Alexa we talked about it in pride. Second i never pretended to be friends with Jen. Plus ur view was wrongfully guided by one side of the spectrum (Jen). I dont want to continue to hang out with her because i dont like her. I had to not invite river to parties because she didnt like river. Im not going to cater to someone when i dont even want to be around them. Im not going to uninvite river and toast because they dont like them. Then it wouldnt be fun. Also im not damaging anything by inviting people to something because i thought she knew we werent friends like??? Ud think after calling me 2 faced and childish and all that shit that the friendship is over dont u think? How do u think i would feel having to be around someone who said that shit about me. Did it not occur to u that i had feelings too or did u forget that every doesn’t revolve around Jen.
Sky 09/29/2018
Why the hell,, ok why the fuck would you not invite river to shit cause of Jen. I’m inviting toast and jen. I expect them to be civil and to get along, if they don’t, that’s not on me. You shouldn’t not invite river cause of Jen, rivers your best friend, not jen. That’s so fucking weird that you would say that. Second, I’m not wrongfully guides by Jen. Jen and Mav and Ryan are the only ones that seem to care about me, Jen has been a positive impact on my life, she’s made me more confident in myself and made me feel stronger. She has guided me positively and I definitely view her as a role model to me. Also, “did it not occur to you I had feelings” oh? Did it not occur to you that I had feelings when you left me sobbing on the ground? :) cause it really made me feel insignificant and like you didn’t care about my feelings. Cause listen up, I care about you more then you fucking think, so don’t you dare fucking say that. Jen is just the one who seems to actually be there for me when I’m in dark times, so yes, i want Jen to be included. Also sure, maybe not everything revolves around Jen, but not everything revolves around you either. Did you ever think about that?
Sky 09/29/2018
Listen. I’m kinda stressed by this whole thing and I don’t want it to go on. So let’s make this simple. I want to stop arguing right now, I want to stay your friend and I want to be friends with Jen. If I plan I hangout I will invite both of you because you’re both my friends, I don’t want this to break our friendship or make you not want to hang out tomorrow, I’m sorry I even brought it up, it’s making me really sad and upset. I really did think you were friends with jen, sorry if that makes me ignorant, that’s just what I saw. So seeing you not include her made me sad, I guess I get it now. Sorry. Can we just forget about it?
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Sobbing is a cute word for silently ignoring me with headphones. i left because my ride was there and i tried to talk to u and u ignored me and u were not being kind to anyone at that time so i wasnt about to defend u and tell u that “its ok u were right!!” When u were calling someone horrible names that they did nothing to deserve. U are wrongly guided by Jen. U might not think so. But u definitely are. I just wanna know when iv told u about whats happened between me and jen. Cause i know i didnt say anything soooo where r u getting ur info from. Its definitely not biased or anything. :)))))). Never said the world revolved around me so thx for ur random comment. And to round things up, just to learn u, u dont invite 2 friends who dont get along to a party because that really rude. Neither will have fun and just cause tension and nooo one likes that. No one. Fun ruined. Party ruined. Being civil wont fix anything. Anyway river didnt even like know jen at all. I was friends with her at that point and didnt want to have a shitty party because she wouldnt get alone with someone no matter the chances that they might get along tell me one time u came to me and expressed in anyway that u needed help? And then tell me when u did that to Jen. Both u and Jen said mean shit to toast which really hurt their feelings over nothing and really expected me to not be angry with u. Wow. Just really proves how u dont think about anyone elses feelings.
Sky 09/29/2018
Bitch I wasn’t fucking wearing headphones?
I was crying my fucking eyes out having a panic attack
When I have panic attacks I can’t fucking speak
Madi 💕09/29/2018
U were watching a video on ur phone
U literally were
Thats what u were doing
It was shane dawson
Sky 09/29/2018
That’s not what I fucking remember
I wasn’t watching shit
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Well :shrug:♀️
Sky 09/29/2018
I also just said I wanted this to stop and you ignored me
And now I feel like shit
I’m fucking shaking madi
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Well that sucks
Why dont u talk to ur mentor
Ahh yes the old 5 second ignore
Sky 09/29/2018
Are you fucking serious?
Don’t show up. Don’t talk to me ever again. I can’t believe you just said that
Madi 💕09/29/2018
I wasnt going to but ok
Sky 09/29/2018
I loved you madi. I cared about you more then you could know.
You did not just fucking say that shit to me
Madi 💕09/29/2018
U know what me too until u called me bitch lol
U dont say that shit to me
Goes both ways
Sky 09/29/2018
YOU JUST FUCKING TOLD ME WHILE IM HAVING A FUCKING PANIC ATTACK AND WHILE IM SHAKING SO BAD THAT IT HURTS MY HANDS TO TYPE THAT “OH WELL THAT SUCKS”
YOU EXPECT ME TO BE N I C E?
R e a l l y???
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Cause u just called me a bitch and blaming me for not helping u when I literally couldnt soooo no u i didnt expect u to be nice cause u already werent
Sky 09/29/2018
Yes you fucking could’ve.
Jen came to me
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Nope
Sky 09/29/2018
Jen and Mav and Ryan? They came to me
I never asked for their help
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Really thought they went home?
Sky 09/29/2018
Point is Madi. You just said you cared about me and then you tell someone diagnosed legally with anxiety that “oh well that sucks” Did you know panic attacks can make someone feel like they’re dying? Cause that’s how I feel right now.
I feel like I’m fucking having a heart attack
Madi 💕09/29/2018
So then why would u continue to text me with perfect texting abilities if ur shaking and im the one making u have it. U already said im incapable of helping so i dont get ur point
Sky 09/29/2018
Everytime you send a message its shittier then the last one
Madi 💕09/29/2018
:shrug:♀️well thats ur opinion
Sky 09/29/2018
Maybe cause I like letting my anger out on you? I’m fucking pissed if you can’t tell
No all my friends agree with me uwu
P sure it’s fact at this point
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Pretty sure its not lol
Sky 09/29/2018
My friend wants to talk to you by the way.
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Like im positive all ur friends dont agree
Well I literally dont care
Sky 09/29/2018
Wow you really d o hate being wrong, my theory was correct uwu
Madi 💕09/29/2018
Theory means its not proved
Literally what r u saying
Sky 09/29/2018
I’m saying I thought you were an asshole and surprise you’re an assh
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 1,
"OTHER": 0,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 1
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 0,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
WRONG
|
QA0JwITqi3NSmNvvkwfukjS1ofoVSDe6
|
a3novy
|
{
"description": "telling her fiancé about me",
"pronormative_score": 12,
"contranormative_score": 19
}
|
WIBTA If I told her fiancé about me?
|
I (F24) have been friends with Megan (F26) for close to 15 years. She’s kept me a secret friend for 7 years. She’s been engaged for 4 years to a woman she met at college, yet she tells me constantly she’s with her for convenience.
We went through our childhood crush faze years ago, but she has always honestly told me she loves me, & that she still loves me now. Ever since she was young she saw a future with us together, & honestly I could never see her in that way. We tried a few times over the years, but I could never get past kissing as it just felt strange & wrong. It feels natural holding her hand & hugging her when she hugs me, but anything sexual just doesn’t click.
I can appreciate she’s a good looking woman, but I’m not sexually attracted to her.
Being such good friends, we are both pretty honest & open, & we’ve talk repeatedly about how we love and respect each other, but how I can’t see her more than anything but my best friend.
She really is a wonderful friend, she knows I’m there for her 24/7 & it’s mutual. I’m so proud of everything she achieves & has already achieved in her life, & honestly I wish I was allowed to be publicly proud of her. I spent my birthday away from home, & she travelled three hours to spend it with me and other friends. When it’s her birthday my birthday card is hidden & presents are passed off as gifts from family members.
I won’t be invited to her wedding.
Her fiancé knows stories about me when we were younger, & she knows through mutual friends of ours how much her fiancé was in love with me, but we’ve never met. I’ve never been allowed to meet her.
Megan keeps me a secret. We have to hang out in secret, yet we talk every single day. Her family love me, she’s always taking me to go visit her grandparents & her parents. My family love her too, but she’s straight up lied to her fiancé that we’ve been talking ever since they got together. It’s now been close to 7 years I’ve been a secret, & honestly the fiancé deserves better.
Megan told me today whilst watching Netflix that if I wanted her, she’d end the engagement & be with me instantly.
This is not fair to the fiancé. Should I tell her that I exist? That the woman she’s in love with has lied to her face for years on end, & will continue to do so?
Or do I carry on having my friendship be kept a secret?
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 7,
"OTHER": 12,
"EVERYBODY": 12,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 2
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 12,
"WRONG": 19
}
|
WRONG
|
qdomyxZeQ3tFGaMlzKwS7Z4SbDgATTTk
|
b5yjme
|
{
"description": "confessing to my ex's girlfriend",
"pronormative_score": 5,
"contranormative_score": 7
}
|
WIBTA if I confessed to my ex’s girlfriend?
|
My ex Tom started dating this girl, let’s call her Lily, a couple weeks after we broke up. It’s been a couple months since they started dating. He recently asked me to hang out and I agreed, and we ended up hooking up. I feel terrible about it (I already know I’m the asshole in that scenario) but now I’m worried because I don’t think Tom is going to tell Lily what happened, and if he doesn’t tell her I feel that I would be even more of an asshole for keeping silent as well. I told my friend about the situation and she’s of the opinion that it’s not my relationship and not my responsibility, and that I’d be the asshole if I did tell Lily. So WIBTA for confessing to Lily what happened?
|
HYPOTHETICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 5,
"OTHER": 5,
"EVERYBODY": 2,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 5,
"WRONG": 7
}
|
WRONG
|
3Mf4wvgMnTjzzNF2eXevCFtae5UdGH9z
|
a61jw4
|
{
"description": "saying my mom's coworkers husband (repeated drunk driver) should have died in his accident",
"pronormative_score": 18,
"contranormative_score": 20
}
|
AITA For saying my mom's coworkers husband (repeated drunk driver) should have died in his accident?
|
Greetings. will probably delete this post because I will be thumbed down into oblivion. Recently my mom's friend at work had a dilemma: her husband was involved in a bad car accident. Currently, he has broken ribs, dislocated shoulder, he is on breathing support etc. He is in rough shape. As it came to be, it was not just any old car accident; he was drunk at 8:17 in the morning and lost control of his car and was gravely injured. Now, after hearing my mother and sister talk about this mishap, I chimed in with a little of my two-cents. I told them that I feel he should not be alive after his accident. Him still being alive is too good for what damage he has caused in his time, as well as what could still possibly happen. For years, he has been driving drunk due to his alcoholism and has little to no regard for others around him as long as he has a cold one in his hand. He has put his hands on his family or basically been a dead beat dad for the entirety of his children's lives. My mom informed me without being so straight forward, that it is not my place to judge. I got a little heated saying his injuries were too good for someone who drives drunk frequently and hope he learns his lesson.
Now, I work in customer service for a phone company, and come across many men who cannot drive due to not having a license. (Have to validate cell phone accounts at work through a scan-able ID. I usually ask why they have an ID instead of a license and they usually laugh and say one too many DUI's. This infuriates me. I have family members injured by drunk drivers, friends killed, and relatives and other acquaintances who have lost loved ones due to these foolish people. It makes me think what if I would lose my family or my girlfriend due to someones poor choice. This being said, I have developed a strong prejudice against alcoholism and drunkards. Drunk drivers to me are some of the worst scum of the earth who always seem to take some of the best people from this world way before their time.
​
With all this being said, AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 18,
"OTHER": 18,
"EVERYBODY": 2,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 18,
"WRONG": 20
}
|
WRONG
|
Nnu895gAP2fQk7rmO7Kt4mqZOjp9WvVV
|
9wixg3
|
{
"description": "feeling kinda fishy about a friend and not really trusting her anymore",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for feeling kinda fishy about a friend and not really trusting her anymore
|
So i've been wanting to post this for ages. Just didn't really know how to write it all out, still don't know so i'll try.
So what happened wasn't really anything serious. I ranted about another friend to her, we'll call the friend i ranted about J.
Basically what happened between me and J was this:
1. I came to school a few minutes too late and saw J sitting on a bench, in the hallway crying. She was surrounded by friends.
(they weren't comforting her btw, they were just sitting across her. Minding their own business, Idk if they tried to comfort her but the whole time while i was there no one said anything to her. For all i know they might've tried).
2. No one said anything to her so i tried to talk to her, to see if i could help her and maybe say the right thing to her to make her feel better.
3. This is where i try to reach the core of the story. Mind you, all of her friends already knew this WAY before this happened. It has been going on for a long time.
She said to me that her parents were yelling at her last night, because she wanted to discuss smth and what she said came out wrong. She then proceeded to cry some more and because i felt bad and kinda awkward
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 1,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
RIGHT
|
0y4wGmypZz85ouoEmdznADSB8lhFwPBP
|
b8ohxv
|
{
"description": "pointing out to the guy on my flight that he has really obnoxious BO",
"pronormative_score": 4,
"contranormative_score": 16
}
|
AITA for pointing out to the guy on my flight that he has really obnoxious BO?
|
This morning on business travel, I was stuck on a flight with a guy who has really, really bad body odor. He wasn’t dirty or anything. He was dressed normally. But for whatever reason, he had REALLY bad BO.
At first I asked for a different seat, even in economy cabin if no seat was available in business. But the flight was over sold. I tried adjusting the air conditioning to blow directly in my face, spritzing some eau de toilette on a napkin and holding it to my nose. I could still smell the BO.
So finally I said something to him. I told him I didn’t know if anyone had said something to him before, but he had really bad body odor. I told him he should consider using a strong deodorant before going into public spaces. I said maybe it was his diet or his culture (he’s Indian/Southeast Asian) or a medical condition, I don’t know. I encouraged him to have a little consideration for the people around him who may have sensitivity to odors and to use a deodorant.
The flight attendant was very apologetic and came by frequently to make sure I have everything I needed (snacks, drinks, etc). At least she was sympathetic to my plight. A few other passengers around me came up to me after we deplaned to thank me for saying something. But the Indian guy gave me the nastiest look in the terminal on our way out.
I don’t think I could have handled this any differently. AITA here for saying something?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 8,
"OTHER": 3,
"EVERYBODY": 8,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 4,
"WRONG": 16
}
|
WRONG
|
dMo3esflqXbHuAOAvFBuFrHDd98iLc9d
|
b17rv9
|
{
"description": "abandoning my paranoid friend",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA For abandoning my paranoid friend.
|
I apologise for my bad english in advance, I'm still learning.
So, last week I was with my best friend and some other friend when he told us about his cousins who didn't talked to him or came to visit him for a long time. I was surprised and say "What?" But i guessed he didn't hear me. The next day he texts me about the thing happening with his cousins, saying I didn't care about him because I didn't listen to his confession. I ask "what confession?" He answers "oh yeah the stories I keep telling you since january" But I don't remember such a thing and I tell him that I do care about him since he is one of my best friends, but he doesn't believe me. Now everyday he keeps texting me with the same sentence:"Say it, you don't want to be My friend" and everytime I just tell him that he's My friend. Until yesterday, I told him he was just a paranoid freak and I never answered his lasts text.
I remember he told me that his entire childhood was horrible, that he's been bullied and that he had no friends, or the ones he had would be bullying him in the end. But I feel uncomfortable now.
So, am I the asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
RIGHT
|
3YYFbfRI9ckFKvIubhnamqfmruJ711KA
|
au9eij
|
{
"description": "wanting to kick out a band member who I live with",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for wanting to kick out a band member who I live with
|
So for the past few years me and my roommate (who I will call Guitarist, because he plays guitar) have played in a band together. We didn’t know each other before being in a band together but have become close friends since then. A few months ago, Guitarist and I moved into a place together, as it was mutually beneficial for both of us and we both figured we’d make good roommates.
Recently Guitarist has gotten more and more flaky about band commitments, including regularly missing band practices with flimsy excuses, missing shows and generally not showing any sort of interest or initiative about the band. Me and the other members have talked to him about this and expressed our concerns, but he insists he is still invested in the band. I have also noticed since moving in with him that Guitarist doesn’t to play guitar in his own time and has also been flakey about commitments to his other band.
During December last year we played some shows interstate that Guitarist was unable to make due to work commitments (which we completely understood). We had a couple of friends of the band fill-in for us, who did a great job and we had a lot of fun playing with them. Both of our friends have expressed interest in joining the band, and myself and the other members of the band agree they’d be a good fit.
My issue is that at the end of the day I still think Guitarist is a great guy and I’m concerned about creating tension at home if we kick him out of the band. I’m torn between this and what’s best for the band, as myself and the other members have dedicated a lot of time and energy to it.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
QnW5Ujl3kVQ1at5NiwZRscnCDkbWQ9Ax
|
an7460
|
{
"description": "making fun of my best friends girlfriend's weight after she hit my dog and kicked me out of her house when I was drunk",
"pronormative_score": 0,
"contranormative_score": 32
}
|
AITA for making fun of my best friends girlfriend’s weight after she hit my dog and kicked me out of her house when I was drunk?
|
Hi everyone, throwaway here. Sorry if this is long.
Backstory: my friend has been with his current gf for a while, she definitely has a weight problem but it’s never something I have brought up.
Anyways,
I was at at my best friends Super Bowl party yesterday, he invited about 10 friends and told a couple of us to bring our dogs. I have a 95 lb German Shepherd, and he has a 60ish lb pitbull mutt. These dogs are literally best friends for over 2 years and do everything together. We take them everywhere together and they absolutely love each other. Most dogs are scared of my dog for how big he is, and this is literally the only dog friend he has so he gets a little crazy when he sees him. They love to play..they are both extremely energetic and have spent 3+ hours nibbling and chasing each other before. It’s always super cute and we just let it happen because they love it.
Now, we were watching the game...most people were just drinking or talking and at this point I’m pretty drunk. Now our dogs are in the other room making a bunch of noise chasing each other, me and my buddy have no problem with it. At some point my friends GF, asked us if we could shut them up or if I could put my dog in their kennel. (My dog never goes in a kennel at this point in his life). We both insisted that it is fine, and yelled at our dogs to keep quiet. They immediately stopped making noise but kept playing. At some point our dogs knocked over an expensive clock they had while we were playing a drinking game. Friends GF instantly screams, gets up, and hits both of our dogs. My dog instantly growled and snapped at her but did not bite her, and then ran over to me.
I got mad and asked her why the hell she hit my dog, she went on a rant talking about how annoying my dog is and how she doesn’t want him in her house anymore. She proceeded to yell at me for how untrained my dog was (he isn’t, however I got him from a German Shepherd sanctuary when he was 2 and he was a handful back then) he’s perfectly trained now that he’s older and I haven’t had a problem with him since he was adopted. At this point I got mad and told her to stop bitching..she goes off on me and calls me an asshole. Best friend gets involved and yells at us to stop. We stop.
30 mins later I’ve drank a bit more and our dogs are still playing, causing no harm just messing around with each other. I can tell she is fuming because she is just staring at them. She asks me “why the fuck is your dog so annoying” and I’m pretty hammered and I respond “maybe your fat ass ate all his kibble, I know you always eat Stella’s (friends dog). She goes irate and tells me to get out of her house with all her friends backing her up. I yelled a couple of a pretty mean insults at her involving her weight and a lot of the guys started laughing which didn’t help. My best friend also hasn’t said a word during this.. she tells me to leave and I tell her fine but she needs to wait because I’m hammered and need an Uber. She says no and starts pushing me out the door. She’s a pretty big girl and I’m struggling to stay inside while her and her friends are pushing me out the door. (I didn’t even have my dog packed up). My other drunk friends are just laughing.. my dog sees what is going on and runs over and bites one of her friends on the arm who was pushing me, he drew blood but I later found out he didn’t get her too good. Anyway, after this they start yelling how they’re gonna get my dog killed for biting and call the cops.i grabbed him and got the fuck out of there and drove home with my dog (real bad choice I know, but I was being drunk and was emotional)...After last night my best friend won’t talk to me or respond to any of my calls. I know i shouldn’t have made fun of his girlfriends weight but I really feel like she overreacted.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
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|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
WRONG
|
L7SLkMUMqwY7hC7IGMruhBoThXBobNLX
|
a1hvox
|
{
"description": "ruining a friendship for a stupid reason",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for ruining a friendship for a stupid reason?
|
My friend and I recently got into an argument. It was because we were playing a game and I said this character was amazing, and he disagreed. Here's how it went.
​
Me: this character is amazing i swear i got 10 kills.
Friend: that character is shit lol 10 kills isnt good
Me: u do u i guess i think its good
Friend: Like I said, if u use it u must be really shit in this game
Me: ok then u can use other characters i guess
Friend: Like I said, you're fucking shit lol.
Me: ?? why are you getting so worked up it's just a game
Friend begins shouting: I'm not worked up and ure the one being toxic??
​
basically it escalated and we broke our friendship. i said to him if you aren't worked up why did you repeat the same comment twice when saying it once was enough? and he got really pissed off and just stopped talking to me.
AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
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"INFO": 1
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
RIGHT
|
r9z7dWSBLZarFjE8xJnnlSG8KnylZB8v
|
b607ka
|
{
"description": "falling asleep in my girlfriends lecture",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 5
}
|
AITA for falling asleep in my girlfriends lecture?
|
My girlfriend wanted me to go with her to watch this guy give a lecture. She is in college so it was required for her to attend. She knew I didn’t want to go but if I didn’t she was gonna be mad so I went. Then I fell asleep in the first 15 minutes and slept through the whole thing. So am I an asshole?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 2,
"OTHER": 3,
"EVERYBODY": 3,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 3,
"WRONG": 5
}
|
WRONG
|
4LxgQqqfl9s4wjHSOfWeiDRObcjiXbqf
|
a3j29y
|
{
"description": "anoying my neighbor",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 1
}
|
AITA for anoying my neighbor
|
I live on road at the far right of 3 houses. In the middle house is my neighbor and the far left house is my retarded best friend. My friend and I very obnoxious to our neighbor because we usualy hang out in his yard while he is painting or practicing his instrument, very badly i might add.(lets just call him mr.t) mr. T and i work together in a resturant together. I am a frycook, he is the cashier/waiter. My friend sometime comes over to the resurant and orders an amount of food no one should eat and one time he had to bring him about 300 hamburgers. And afterward he didnt even pay him. The worst part is that lives in giant Tiki head and I live in a pineapple.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 1,
"OTHER": 0,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 1,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 1
}
|
RIGHT
|
RiYBQQYrmEyVKaZd7A5gAPhsqXV5ujgG
|
amjg1h
|
{
"description": "dumping my boyfriend over a hug",
"pronormative_score": 2,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for dumping my boyfriend over a hug?
|
Basically, my boyfriend (14m) was caught hugging another girl in the bus line at school yesterday. My best friend told me about it and so I told him "leave me alone". Today I asked him why he would do it and at first he lied and said it wasn't true but then he told me it was true and apologized. So I broke up with him for basically cheating on me behind my back and lying about it. Did I overreact! He's begging for me to take him back
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 3,
"OTHER": 0,
"EVERYBODY": 3,
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"INFO": 3
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 2,
"WRONG": 6
}
|
WRONG
|
ggDIrVkp1IYuE5TA6srFg89Nmh9oZSYK
|
awwkj5
|
{
"description": "staying with my bf instead of going to my parents' country house",
"pronormative_score": 1,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA for staying with my bf instead of going to my parents' country house?
|
I live with my parents and brother (12yo) and they went today to our country house but I made some excuses to stay in the city because I want to go out with my boyfriend (I see him once a week). I went to the countryside with my family last week, but my brother felt bad because I wasn't going and he wanted to stay as well, but my mom refused (I didn't have any problem with him staying with me).
Now I feel guilty for not going. AITA?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 0,
"INFO": 1
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 1,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
3ECmtesvGehKEMq3LnYuTvxcIfKgCEzK
|
atznpe
|
{
"description": "expecting him to drop his online friends and look after me while I'm ill",
"pronormative_score": 8,
"contranormative_score": 6
}
|
AITA for expecting him to drop his online friends and look after me while I’m ill?
|
So I’ve been pretty ill for the last week but today it culminated in me needed to go to see the emergency GP with acute bronchitis.
Most of the day my boyfriend has been in and out running errands and doing jobs around the house, while I mostly just try to keep breathing on the sofa!
Around 4 hours ago, after completing the things he wanted to get done, he starting gaming on his PC. His PC is set up in our open plan living room. After an hour or so I asked if I could have some cuddle time. I have been feeling really down in the dumps, especially having to spend the warmest weekend of the year inside!
He didn’t want to come cuddle with me because he was in the middle of a game, so I asked if he would later. He said yes. 40 minutes went by and I asked again. Same response. Another 40 minutes and I ask again. He says he doesn’t see the point because he’d be bored and it wouldn’t make me feel better anyway. He says he’s been supportive by getting my drinks and food all day, taking me to the hospital etc but all I want is a little bit of emotional support!
I know he’s been there’s for me all day physically but it’s been 4 hours and I just want a hug. On a normal Saturday night we’d cuddle and watch a film but he’s just not interested. For the record, it’s not that he doesn’t want my germs, we’ve still been sharing a bed etc, if he was going to get ill, it’s too late for that now!
AITA for expecting him to drop his online friends and look after me?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 5,
"OTHER": 5,
"EVERYBODY": 1,
"NOBODY": 3,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
"RIGHT": 8,
"WRONG": 6
}
|
RIGHT
|
U77hEi7ROdqGHpRL7cxiPFcfHofwqb2X
|
apivmg
|
{
"description": "not wanting to play a human character in dnd and upsetting my fiancé",
"pronormative_score": 3,
"contranormative_score": 2
}
|
AITA for not wanting to play a human character in DnD and upsetting my fiancé?
|
I'll get straight into it - I love playing RPGs, but I always prefer to play nonhuman characters. It's tough for me to explain why, but basically I have some social issues and find it a lot easier to act as something nonhuman than as a human. I've mentioned my preference in passing a few times, but most settings accommodate this easily, so we've never had a lengthy discussion about it.
My Fiance likes to be the DM. He runs games at the weekend for a few mutual friends sometimes, but I can rarely attend due to work obligations. In a couple of weeks, I'll have a day off at the weekend, which is rare, so I asked if I could play that week. He was happy to let me into the game, so I asked him about a few character concepts for the setting they were playing in.
This is where it turns out that he was planning to run a one shot that week in a setting where 99% of the characters are human. I asked him if there were any nonhuman options and he responded with "There are a lot of different types of human." I told him that I'd think about whether it was a good idea for me to play - I really don't like playing humans and I knew that even if we could compromise, he probably wouldn't be happy. He likes to keep things lore accurate and he's very conscious of the "DM's girlfriend" stereotype.
He was upset, saying that he really liked this setting, he'd thought I liked it too and wanted me to be excited and happy to play like he was.
This whole conversation took place over text, so we'll talk about it and find a compromise later, but AITA here?
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 2,
"OTHER": 1,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 2,
"INFO": 0
}
|
AUTHOR
|
{
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}
|
RIGHT
|
vdzfvoWZHVpkAQzbA3W8Djc8E6saYkjl
|
avlwpk
|
{
"description": "not paying my parents rent",
"pronormative_score": 6,
"contranormative_score": 0
}
|
AITA For not paying my parents rent?
|
I saw a post on here where someone asked if they were the asshole for not wanting to pay rent to their parents. I am 19 years old and I am in college. My parents have never asked me to give them money for rent, but I'm worried that they might not want to ask me, because we live in a country where it is common to live with your parents longer than in the USA. I am worried that I might be an asshole for not volunteering money to my parents. At the moment I am not working, I am only studying, as it takes up a lot of my time.
|
HISTORICAL
|
{
"AUTHOR": 0,
"OTHER": 3,
"EVERYBODY": 0,
"NOBODY": 3,
"INFO": 0
}
|
OTHER
|
{
"RIGHT": 6,
"WRONG": 0
}
|
RIGHT
|
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